Thanks for the reviews, for both stories. I'm glad you all enjoyed the epilogue. I would have updated this sooner, but after posting something like seven chapters in as many days I felt like I needed to take a few days off. ;)
As promised, there're some more familiar faces in this chapter, and a couple of Jate moments. For those of you who are getting impatient, it'll be the second last beach one, then, in chapter 6, they'll head off.
Chapter 4. Selective Amnesia
The more people that she and Jack spoke to, Kate noticed, the more distinctive the pattern became. Either they had blacked out like her, and weren't conscious during the actual crash, or like Jack, they didn't remember anything after the plane started to lose altitude.
"You see it in trauma patients all the time," he explained as they made their way further up the beach, to a new group. "I'm not sure what the technical term for it is – psychology was never my strong suit – but it's not uncommon for people to develop a kind of selective amnesia after living through an event like this."
His words were meant to comfort her, but Kate felt herself getting more and more frustrated by the idea. "So what do we do if no one remembers anything?" she asked, remembering what he'd said the night before, about not wanting to go into the jungle blind. "We just give up?"
"No, we try something else," he told her patiently, flashing her a gentle, reassuring smile. "If Kevin's alive, we'll find him, Kate, I promise. It just might take a while." His smile wavered at Kevin's name, and an uncomfortable silence fell over them, causing him to look away, towards the ocean.
"Do you mind if we take a little detour?" he asked finally, his eyes falling on a blonde girl curled up on a bank of airplane seats. "There's someone I really should talk to."
Curious as to their connection, Kate followed him down the edge of the surf, where the girl was writing in a little book suspended over her heavily pregnant belly. She was too young to be in a relationship with him; even though Jack's colouring was darker, Kate thought that there was a slight resemblance there, but when Jack spoke, it was with the kind of politeness normally reserved for strangers.
"Hey, Claire."
Sliding her pen into the book to mark her place, she looked up at Jack, her face breaking into a grin. "Hi. Jack, right?" When she struggled to sit up fully, Jack took her arm, helping her shift her weight.
"You remember?" he asked, looking surprised.
She flashed him a grateful smile as he let go. "Of course I remember. You only saved my—our—" she amended, cupping her belly with her free hand, "—lives. I would've been crushed by that wing if you hadn't dragged me out of the way."
Her face was full of such unadulterated admiration that Jack looked away, letting out a self-deprecating laugh as he stared down at the sand. He was so unaware of how amazing he was that, while she wasn't going to start gushing like Claire, Kate couldn't help admiring him too.
"Looks like your contractions stopped," he said, changing the subject when he looked up again.
"Yup. Yesterday, thank God," Claire agreed, letting out an exaggerated sigh. She set the book down against her thigh, prodding at her belly with one finger. "Now if he would just start kicking again it'll all be good." Her brow creased in concern as she waited, seeming to feel nothing. "You don't think it means anything that he's not, do you?"
She looked so young that Kate couldn't help feeling sorry for her, facing the possibility of losing her baby after everything they'd been through. At the same time, she found herself feeling a little envious, because in spite of everything she'd said to Kevin since the wedding, she really would have liked to start a family with him.
Jack must have felt sorry for Claire too, because even though he looked like he agreed with her, he said, "No, not necessarily – just try to take it easy for a while, and let me know if there's no change."
She relaxed a little on hearing this, seeming to take his word for it as she sank back into her seat. "Is this your wife?" she asked, looking curious as she glanced over at Kate.
Jack coloured slightly, and Kate could feel herself flushing too. Everyone they spoke to seemed to think they were a couple, even though they'd only known each other a grand total of about eighteen hours.
"No, this is Kate," Jack explained, recovering first. "Her husband was in the back of the plane when it crashed." Kate felt her stomach tighten again when Claire offered her a sympathetic smile, as if she too believed he was dead. "We're actually thinking of heading out into the jungle to look for it – you don't happen to remember anything from when the tail broke off, do you?"
Claire closed her eyes, shuddering. "No. I remember feeling the air rushing past me, and hearing people screaming, but I didn't look, if that's what you mean."
Out of the corner of her eye, Kate saw Jack glance over at her, concerned at how she might be handling this, but she ignored him, staring out at the ocean as she only half listened. So far this morning, she'd had to endure at least ten different accounts of what happened when they lost the tail, not one of them useful. If it was all for nothing, she wasn't sure she could hear any more.
"Sorry if I embarrassed you when I asked if you were married," she heard Claire say to Jack. "You guys just seem so comfortable together I thought…"
"It's okay, it's an easy mistake to make," Jack cut in, and Kate saw him glance over at her again, looking guilty this time. "If there's nothing you remember, we should probably keep going."
After saying goodbye to Claire, he turned back to Kate. "If we're going to do this, I want to head out before it gets dark."
He didn't seem to know what to say to her after the mix up with Claire, so once they were out of earshot she said, teasing him, "So you saved her life, huh?"
He lost his awkwardness in favour of embarrassment, running a hand over his hair. "Not really. It wasn't as big a deal as she made it sound – I just helped her get out of the way."
Once again, Kate was impressed by down to earth he was. He didn't seem to have an ego, or if he did, he kept it well hidden. "Yeah, well, you obviously didn't see the way her face lit up when you came over to talk to her. It was a big deal to her," she told him, her smile turning wistful as she added, "Must be nice, fixing people, saving lives."
"Yeah?" He let out another laugh as he asked, "What makes you say that?"
It wasn't something she wanted to talk about, so she shrugged. "I just wouldn't say the difference I make in people's lives is positive."
Jack looked over at her again, surprised, and curious, at this.
He probably thinks I'm just being hard on myself, she thought bitterly. If only he knew…
"I don't believe that for a second, Kate," he said in a tone that was so warm and kind and not what she deserved that it made her want to burst into tears. "You must have made a difference in Kevin's life."
She couldn't tell him the truth, that she had, by lying to him, so she said, squeezing her eyes shut to keep from crying, "If I hadn't married him, he wouldn't've been on that plane…"
She opened them again when he put a hand lightly on her bicep, his brown eyes full of sympathy. "Hey, this isn't your fault. You didn't know the plane was going to crash."
He was being so sweet and forgiving that for some reason she wanted to break down and tell him everything: who she was, what she'd done, how she'd hurt the people she loved, but she couldn't, so she settled for letting him in on the fear that had been plaguing her since the crash. "What if it is? I still don't know where he went before we crashed – what if it had something to do with me?"
His hand slipped from her arm, his expression a mixture of sadness, guilt and pity as he stared up the beach, steeling his courage for whatever he was going to say. "Kate, there's something I should—"
It was the second time he'd started to tell her something about Kevin, but before he could finish, he was interrupted by a Middle Eastern man in a stained wife beater. "Excuse me," he said in his accented English as he came to meet them a few paces ahead of the group. "Did I hear that you're planning on going into the jungle?"
Jack stopped at these words, looking surprised. "That's right, as soon as we can get a lead on the tail."
The Middle Eastern man frowned. "Are you sure that's wise? The rescuers…"
"If it's on the island somewhere, there could be survivors," Jack explained with the same stubbornness as the previous night, only this morning, his position was reversed. "We need to make sure they get picked up too."
Behind them, a blonde man in a striped shirt stood up from the piece of wreckage he was sitting on. "The bloody tail broke off in mid-air! How could anyone survive that?" he said in a thick British accent.
"Hey!" Jack flashed him a warning look, gesturing to Kate. "This woman's husband was in the back of the plane. A little empathy."
"Oh, right." Cringing, the British man flicked his eyes over to Kate. "Sorry."
When the Middle Eastern man followed this up with a sympathetic look that might as well have been his condolence, she thought about reminding them all that they didn't know Kevin was dead, but decided that there was no point. They would continue to believe whatever they wanted to believe, so she just nodded to show the British man that she was okay.
Waiting for them to move on to something more productive, Kate glanced in the direction of the jungle, noticing, for the first time, an Asian woman kneeling on the outskirts of the group, sifting through a pile of luggage. She flashed Kate a sad smile when she saw her looking at her, as if she'd heard what Jack said about Kevin, but when Kate tried to make eye contact with her, she returned her attention to her work, ignoring her.
Figuring that she must be shy, or that it was a cultural thing, Kate shrugged, tuning back into the conversation in time to hear the Middle Eastern man say, "If you're going to search for the tail, then I would like to come with you."
Seemingly annoyed at his interference, Jack ran his fingers over his hair, offering him a polite smile. "Thanks, but we've got it."
The other man's expression darkened, his tone taking on a hint of menace. "I wasn't asking for your permission."
Jack looked taken aback by his quiet assurance, as if he wasn't expecting further argument, and Kate couldn't help wondering if the other man was a soldier of some kind. She'd been around enough military men in her life to recognise one when she saw one, and he had that vibe about him.
"I'm sure you have your reasons for wanting to come along," Jack said, and Kate could tell that he was trying to be diplomatic in case their new friend was dangerous, "but someone has to stay behind to talk to the rescuers. I don't think it would be a bad idea to send a group out to the cockpit, either – if we had the transceiver, we could radio for help."
The Middle Eastern man nodded, considering this. "I'll go," he said finally. "I was a communications officer in the military – if we find the transceiver, I might be able to get it working."
Seemingly relieved that they'd been able to come up with a plan they both agreed on, Jack nodded. "Good."
After exchanging names, the two men parted ways, Jack continuing his rounds with Kate while the Middle Eastern man, Sayid, headed off to make his own preparations. The British man followed, and as he scurried after him, Kate heard him say, "I'll come with you," to which Sayid shook his head, the two men arguing all the way to the fuselage.
So there you have it: Claire, Charlie, Sayid and Sun (as you might have guessed, we haven't seen the last of her!). I know a few of you wanted Hurley, but I don't get the whole California slacker thing so I find him hard to write. Maybe later, if it fits. I was going to include Locke, but this is when he was still in his creepy silent phase, so I figured he wouldn't be much help...