Wrong Kind of Hero

Chapter 6: Poisoned Apples and the Fairest of Them All

Their first kiss was sweet, gentle, chaste and very short, due to all the people watching them. Their second was not. Lily was ever the model student, so she had an excuse to be wandering the school grounds late in the evening for her Herbology something-or-other project with Snape in tow. Why she was doing this on the night of the Yule Ball, still in her dress, was slightly more questionable.

"Can I kiss you again?" She heard herself asking, and Sev's grip on her hand tightened as he drew in a sharp breath.

"You could," he hedged, "but perhaps it would be better if I kissed you first." Lily had worried about knowing what to do when a boy finally kissed her, but all her older friends had told her it was instinctual and if she just stopped thinking about it too much, her body would take care of the rest. Severus was lowering his lips to hers now, intent on kissing her and nothing else, and she shut out all other thoughts.

First kisses are awkward, and second kisses sometimes even more so. Take Sirius and Remus, for example. During their first kiss, Remus was so nervous he tried to turn it into a forehead peck and Sirius tried to follow his lips up with disastrous results— Remus turned at the last second so all Sirius got was a mouthful of neck and hair, with a trembling, nervous Remus trying to turn the whole affair into a platonic hug. Sirius eventually got fed up with waiting, took matters into his own hands, tilted Remus's chin toward him and kissed him anyway. Then neither of them were sure how to end a kiss, so they sort of kept at it for five minutes until Remus forgot to breathe through his nose and almost fainted. Even James bumped noses with the girl in question on his first kiss, and then got part of his lip caught in her braces. He still winces whenever he sees wire cutters. The point is not whether the kiss goes smoothly and without incident, or whether nerves and madly scrambling brains get in the way of the intended romance. The depth of feeling on both parties involved makes all the difference. If there is love enough, and desire enough, all other faults can be glossed over.

And so it was that despite inexperience on both parts, Lily and Severus were able to enjoy their first few kisses immensely, if only because the long anticipation was finally over and the sensations were new and different. Lily pulled back between kisses, breathing heavily and with a strange heat pooled low in her belly, feeling Sev trembling like a leaf as he held her against him, hands tangled in her hair. She dived back in just as enthusiastically, remembering the truism practice makes perfect, and (eventually) it did.

"Enjoy the dance?" Lily asked Remus when they got back to the dorm that night. Remus colored slightly and nodded.

"Did you get to dance with Sirius at all?"

"We managed," he acknowledged. "We each took half of a lesbian couple who also weren't quite out of the closet yet, and then we swapped partners. Sirius's dancing, on the other hand, was abysmal. I suspect he had a hand in spiking the punch. And you? Was it everything you dreamed and more?"

"Yeah," she said quietly, smiling. "It really was."

"Then I'm happy for you," Remus said firmly, squeezing her hands. "I think maybe I should go be the voice of reason now. James is threatening to fly off the Astronomy tower, and Sirius is egging him on. I love the boy, but you have to admit they're idiots when you put them together."

The night Lily saw the three Marauders in their Animagi states was the night she began to soften toward Sirius, if only for Remus' sake. She hadn't realized it was him, of course. She'd just been about to head back to the castle as the sun went down, carrying her broom under her shoulder, hair tousled from a wild and exhausting race against Sev that had culminated in a thrilling mid-air almost-collision and kiss. Then the black dog pranced up to her. Really, that was the only way to describe its goofy walk. It looked at her expectantly with intelligent eyes and cocked its head, then made like a retriever and pointed its paw toward the Forbidden Forest.

"You want me to follow you, boy? Is something wrong?" The dog just wagged its tail impatiently and panted at her. She shrugged and followed it toward a clearing where a huge stag was drinking from a pool of water. The stag lifted its head at her approach and looked toward her.

"Oh, my…" Lily stood completely still, not wanting to startle the creature, but it slowly made its way toward her and bowed its head to her.

"Go ahead and touch him," said a voice behind her that sounded remarkably like Sirius Black. Lily leapt back, startled.

"What are you doing here?" Sirius cocked his head to one side and stared at her with the same expression that the black dog had earlier. "You're the dog!"

"Padfoot at your service. Remus told us you'd guessed our secret, so we figured you might like to see what we've accomplished." He shrugged eloquently. "We're showing off, really; none of us are at all impressed by the Animagus thing anymore since we've been doing it for years. But the look on your face—" A rat squeaked from its perch on his shoulder. "Oh, yes. Say hello to Wormtail."

"Peter?" Lily said, still astonished. The rat twitched its whiskers at her and squeaked some more. They'd really managed to do it. They were really Animagi, and they'd done it all to help Remus. Now this was a side of the Marauders she'd never seen before. The stag nudged her hand with his velvet-soft nose and she turned back, remembering.

"And this is Prongs," Sirius said, snorting softly. "I know, he just had to get the best animal, right? Lucky bastard."

"Hello, Prongs," she said carefully, placing a hand on the stag's neck. She ran her fingers down the stag's side, feeling rather weird about the whole thing. On one hand, this was toerag James Potter she was touching so gently, and he was clearly enjoying himself. On the other hand, this was a stag named Prongs. It was very confusing. "I think it's wonderful that you guys did all this for Remus," Lily said, attempting to gather her thoughts. "You're really good friends to him."

"Oh, it was nothing much," Sirius said, attempting modesty and failing miserably.

"Don't listen to him," a new voice, Peter's, said. "It took me a lot longer to learn than those two. It's really difficult magic." Lily heard a woof from behind her. She turned and laughed. Sirius had become Padfoot again, and he was doing dog tricks. He really was showing off.

"It's a shame, you know," she said casually. "Prongs is a beautiful animal." Prongs raised himself to his full height and puffed out his chest, as much as it was possible for a deer to do so. "If only James Potter could be as noble," she added, and stifled a laugh as she watched Prongs deflate.

"That's something you'll never hear about my Animagus," Peter said sullenly, to break the tension. "No one ever talks about the noble rat. Or even the clever rat. No, people will be forever swatting at me with brooms and setting traps for me, while if Sirius here ever had need, he could pass himself off as a house pet easily." Padfoot demonstrated what he thought of this comment by lifting up his back leg and wetting Peter's shoe.

In his shaggy black dog form, Lily quickly discovered, she could even take Sirius to the girls' dormitory with her and absentmindedly stroke his silky hair as she studied. He almost made a better dog than a boy, she reflected as she threw a stick for Padfoot again and again and he returned to her, joyfully wagging his tail and licking her face.

"Hey, cut that out- ugh, dog slobber."

Lily and Sev were blissfully happy together, oblivious to the forces surrounding them that disapproved thoroughly of their association, plotting their downfall. Theirs was an innocent courtship, and not that much different, really, from when they were strictly best friends, except that now they didn't have to hide their feelings. Now, they could walk arm in arm with each other through Hogwarts and the teasing they received was justified. Now, they could steal private moments to kiss and hold each other close, and while they were still fuzzy on exactly what should follow the kissing, they were subtly making inquiries and doing research, each in their own ways. Lily preferred to read trashy romance novels and Witch Weekly for advice, and when she discovered necking— and hickeys, which were a strictly Muggle problem, it seemed— they spent an entire week perfecting their technique. Both were painfully shy when it came to physical intimacy, since they feared to seem too bold or weird or somehow wreck their friendship, which they understood was a common problem when couples broke up. Lily and Snape never dreamed they'd separate, of course. Neither had ever felt this way before; it was bloody brilliant in every way. It was impossible that these feelings would just disappear or transfer themselves onto someone else, they felt sure of it.

Just as James Potter felt sure that he could push Snape past his breaking point, push him to a place of such humiliation that Lily would feel it absolutely necessary for her to intervene. When she leapt in to save him, Snape would be in such a dark place, he'd lash out, James felt sure. Lash out at Lily, who would be so hurt and offended, she'd never forgive him. And she'd run straight into James's arms for comfort and understanding, realizing that he was right about poor old Snivellus after all. It was not, James reflected, a very Gryffindor-ish thing to do. It was poor form after all, but all's fair in love and war, as the saying went, and he must have Lily Evans.

He'd known it was destiny ever since he'd seen that her Patronus was a doe. His was a stag. She was the one for him, he just knew it, as everyone had always said he would 'just know'. They were meant for each other, if only she'd see how wonderful he could be. He wasn't fumbling and awkward like Snivellus. He knew how to please a woman, how to make a woman happy. How to make Lily happy. She hadn't taken too well to his former wooing techniques, that was certain, and his friends had counseled him against those tactics. Remus, the one closest to Lily, had explained that his public displays of undying affection were embarrassing Lily and made him come across as a prankster, not serious about winning her. So he'd planned to demonstrate the softer side of James Potter at the Yule Ball. He'd had it all worked out in his head: how chivalrous he would be, presenting her with an ever-blooming rose, paying her compliments on how lovely she looked and how gracefully she danced, telling her he had noticed her smiles. He was going to ask for another chance at wooing her, and he'd be so polite and charming that she wouldn't be able to resist.

But then that damned Slytherin had gotten there first, and she'd said yes! James had no idea what Lily saw in the boy, stringy and pasty as he was. But it was no matter. Whatever slight attraction she might feel for Snape would surely pale when she saw what James was capable of, how much he truly admired her and could understand her as a fellow Gryffindor. First, though, he had to get rid of Snape, and reveal him for the Muggleborn-hater he secretly was.

"Oi, Prongs? Why are you steepling your fingers together and cackling like a mad person?"

"C'mere, Sirius, and I'll tell you all about it."