Delta of Voyager Part 13
Rated T for Teens
Still some slashy stuff, but nothing porno. (sorry) Mostly shippy shippy shippy stuff. Some new revelations. And, hopefully some fresh ideas! Chakotay is my main character with Janeway, Tom, B'Elanna, The Doctor and some neat Tuvok stuff, who I had been neglecting. He's great to write for. And, I can't seem to write w/o Q. He pops in all the time, serving as a guide and maybe even Greek Chorus. Poking, prodding, punctuation, illuminating and best off all, keeping me out of having a too dreary angst-only content.
As always, "canon smannon". James R or James T? Who cares? Voyager characters are somewhat like tofu, esp.--they can be fashioned to be almost anything, esp. my beloved Chakotay who was not only under-developed in the series, he actually evolved backwards or downhill into being another martinet like Riker. You know I hate that! Still, I've been able to work that aspect of the character in. Or my crazed muse has to be more accurate.
This has become quite a writing adventure and as always I'm doing it to see how it ends! Or IF it ends. Enjoy!
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Delta of Voyagerpart something or other….
"Commander!" her familiar address assaulted him just before he could exit her quarters.
"Yes, Captain," he responded formally without turning to reveal his reddened eyes and dampened cheeks.
"The ship!" she said. He anticipated that it would be her first thought. She pulled the sheet around her naked body and rose from the bed.
"All systems are at optimal conditions," he reported, the ever-dutiful martinet. "I've ordered the crew to finish operations that are absolutely necessary and then take at least day of rest before resuming full duties."
Janeway looked around her quarters in bewilderment. She began gathering all the sex toys, costumes, and debris that laid strewn around the room. She quickly tossed them into the replicator for recycling, while taking a moment here and there to gawk at several odd pieces.
"All these things will need to be recycled as soon as possible," she ordered.
Chakotay heart felt like pulverized eggshell. "I've assigned several groups to that detail, but I made their rest a priority," he stated flatly. "We need everyone at 110 percent to get the ship back to her best and be on our way."
"Good," she approved. "I also want each crewmember to report to sickbay. Have the Doctor and Paris coordinate that."
"Yes, ma'am." Those familiar words had never ripped into him with more force. He clenched the fabric on his pants, nails into palms for control.
"You can speak to Neelix about morale issues if you haven't done so already. Obviously, there will be an adjustment period after this…experience. You and I will also be available as councilors, however not everyone will feel comfortable…"
She halted in mid-command. She was closer to Chakotay who had still not faced her. The spot lighting in her room illuminated his side like a finger-painted slash of glowing paint streaking down a dark canvas.
"Yes, Captain?" he prompted. He wanted done with this interchange. He knew enough from the mind meld that this would probably be her next step. Back to business, as if nothing has ever transpired between them.
Well, maybe it was for the best and he should follow her example. Pretend. Compartmentalize. Stop allowing himself to feel anything. Starfleet, Starfleet uber alles! The good of the crew and all that.
If only he could turn the switch on or off the way she did, like an android. Erase program. If only he could dam up his feelings and set them aside for everyone else's sake. There was one giant stumbling block to that: he did not believe as she did that their relationship could cause any harm to anyone or the ship. That was the essential difference between them. He could not accept the lie she told herself to fortify her defenses and get herself through.
"Chakotay?" she began.
Razor shards slashed into his stomach at the sound of his name.
"Will that be all, Captain?" he attempted again, trying to conclude this meeting. He felt dizzy with grief. To have her, to have held her, love her, feel her and then…the nothing. It felt worse than when they had returned from New Earth where she had drawn a virtual line in the sand between them. Now he had experienced the love he wanted to give her only to have it ripped away. It was unbearable.
"I'd like to return to my quarters," he said as calmly as he could, yet he heard his voice quaver.
"No," was her only verbal response.
"Was there something else, Captain?" he closed his eyes against the pain.
"Chakotay…"
His name?
"I… yes, there is one more thing, Commander," she said as she tried to face him.
He was completely at her mercy, which she seemed to possess in short supply.
Her mission was once to apprehend him, make him her prisoner, and bring him to justice. Given those aims, she had succeeded in spades, even if it were not according to Starfleet regulations. She captured his heart and held him in thrall to her wishes. He could not escape. Was it justice to have him so much her willing slave? Perhaps it would have been better for him to be physically slammed into her brig. Then it would not fall into the category of cruel and unusual punishment. Living in between like this was worst than molecular dissolution!
"I think we should aim to meet within the next day and check on all stations."
"Very good." he told her. "Now, if there is nothing more, then I would like to get some sleep."
"Of course," she dismissed.
"Wait!" she said, "There is something else…"
TBC….