Chapter 2: Buford

Here we are, at chapter 2. You get to meet an unsung hero of the battle, General John Buford, and see how the guys deal with being trapped in 1863! But before we go on, I don't own Invader Zim. All the Civil War characters are REAL PEOPLE, and based off of those people through letters, photos, and journals kept by the people, or those around them. And I don't think it matters, but I don't own Gettysburg PA either...or I would have made Lee attack the Union left flank instead of the center. Ah well, read and review.

The four awakened from the painful lethargia brought about by the time/space device. Dib opened his eyes, groaned, and sat up. He was in a small field flanked by groves of trees. He silently prayed that Zim's machine hadn't worked, but he didn't recognize this strange area.

"Ughhh…" Zim groaned as he came to. "Stupid Dib-monkey…" He muttered. Before he could sit up, Dib had sat on top of him, and gripped the front of Zim's shirt.

"ZIM!" Dib cried angrily. "What did you do?! Where are we? When are we?!" Zim shoved Dib off and sat up.

"Well I would know if you and Tak hadn't interfered with the programming of my INGENIOUS time machine, Dib-worm. It's your fault we're lost, and when I get back, I may just leave you two here for causing me so much trouble." While Zim ranted, Tak came to, and proceeded to approach Zim from behind, and clobber him with a fist to the back of the head.

"You're DEAD, Zim!" Tak yelled. She dove into him, and the two Irkens rolled in the grass, each trying to get the upper hand.

"Guys." Dib said. Zim and Tak continued fighting. "Guys? GUYS!" The two invaders looked up at Dib. "Not to interfere with your killing each other, but we do have a serious problem, you know?" Tak and Zim released each other, and stood up.

"We're trapped who knows where and who knows when." Tak scoffed. "What do you plan we do, Dib?"

"I…I dunno." Dib replied.

"Well…" Zim said as GIR awakened from snoring away. "We're going to go find a way back. You can do whatever you want. Come on, GIR!"

GIR let out a very bad "aroof", and leaped up to joined Zim as he walked off into the trees.

"Zim, wait!" Dib called.

"Let him go." Tak sighed. "We stand a better chance trying to find our way back without that idiot screwing with our attempt."

"We?" Dib asked, surprised that Tak was willing to work with him on something.

"Yes…we." Tak replied. "Despite what goes through Zim's empty head, a good soldier knows when to ask for help during a mission."

"You know," Dib said. "I never really understood the…allure in being a soldier. Devoting my life to fighting, dying in someone else's battles, it never seemed very…enticing." Tak narrowed her eyes.

"Being a soldier, training to be the ultimate warrior means reaching the pinnacle of mental and physical evolution." Tak explained. "It strengthens your body, and your discipline, and nothing is more important than being an Irken elite, fighting and dying for your loyalty."

"Still…" Dib admitted. "Going out and dying for honor and other people …it just seems a little stupid and barbaric to me, I guess."

"So I'm stupid and barbaric, am I?" Tak asked snidely.

"No, no, no…" Dib replied, blushing a little. "I just meant that…I mean…." Tak smiled slyly.

"Save the explanations, Dib." She said. "Let's go. We gotta try to find out exactly where we are." The blue-haired alien-in-disguise began walking along the path, in the opposite direction Zim had taken a few minutes earlier. Dib followed behind Tak, looking about the countryside, trying to find something, anything that looked familiar to him.

In topography, the land was rolling country, composed of low hills, with higher areas in several places. Between himself and the horizon, Dib noted that the land was divided into large acreages, fenced off from each other, with small groves of trees scattered throughout the paddocks. Dib thought the place somewhat picturesque, and if he weren't in such a dire predicament, he may have actually liked it. He began to wonder if crop circles ever appeared in the fields.

"Dib, hide!" Tak called in a harsh whisper. She took him by the hand and pulled him into a bush beside the lane.

"What is it?" Dib whispered.

"Shhhhhh." Tak shushed. She looked down the road anxiously. Dib listened, and after a few moments, he heard a strange, staccato thumping sound. The rhythmic beating grew louder and faster, and the ground began to vibrate. Suddenly, from around a bend in the road came two horsemen, followed by a large group of riders in well defined columns, four abreast. As the riders passed, Dib noted their strange attire. The men were all dressed in dark blue caps, and jackets with gold buttons. They wore light blue pants, and many had on tall, black boots. The rider in front wore a lighter blue coat than the others, and a black hat with crossed swords on it, and held a smoking pipe in his mouth as he rode. As Dib and Tak watched silently from the foliage, the rider in front, an older man with a graying moustache, held up his right hand, and reined his horse to a stop. The other riders stopped as well, and the older horseman's companion turned toward the mass of mounted men.

"DETAIL!" He called. "Diiiiiiismount!" Upon the order, eight of the horsemen climbed off of their horses, retrieving rifles from scabbards on their saddles. They began looking about in all directions. Dib and Tak all but tried to melt into the ground.

"Do you really think they'll come into town from this direction, general?" The man who had given the order asked the older man. The general took the pipe from his mouth and still staring forward said:

"I reckon they will. Old Heath is still around somewhere, and my guess is he's gonna try to sweep into town…maybe Hill's entire corp, right down the Pike."

"What are we to do, sir?" The other man asked.

"We'll ride into town, make the people happy. But Colonel Devin, I do believe come tomorrow, we're gonna have to fight like the devil until we get support. Maybe we can hold 'em off till then.

"So…" Dib thought to himself, "It's some kind of war. But when? It's somewhere in America, but the men are riding horses. Soldiers haven't rode horses since the late 1800's, right?

"Damn." Tak whispered, shaking Dib from his thoughts.

"Hey, you kids! Come out of there! One of the soldiers yelled, pointing his rifle toward the bush. At the alarm, all of the dismounted men moved to stand beside the one who had called out, and pointed their weapons. Several of the horsemen pulled rifles and pistols and aimed them. Dib looked nervously at Tak.

"Tak?" He whispered.

"We can make it." She said, starting to draw back.

"They have guns!" Dib argued. "They've got us."

"Blast it…" Tak growled.

"Don't shoot!" Dib called, raising his arms, and standing.

"Come on out of there!" One of the soldiers ordered.

"Alright!" Dib said, Tak rising beside him. They started out of the bush. "We're not the enemy or whatever, okay?"

"We'll be the judge of that, son." A man with a pistol and yellow stripes on his sleeve replied. As the two stepped toward the soldiers, they were partially surrounded by the men. The general and his companion rode over to get a better look at their new prisoners.

"What were you kids doing hiding in the bushes?" The man the general had called Devin asked. "Spying, perhaps?"

"No, no, no." Dib stammered. "We're not spying on anyone, we just heard a noise and hid, and…"

"We don't have to tell you people anything." Tak said defiantly, crossing her arms.

"Well, missy," The general replied. "I'd think you do, and you'd better. These fellows here may get it in mind to shoot you for being spies if you don't convince 'em otherwise.

"Well," Tak began. "Like Dib here said, we were walking down this road, and we heard your horses coming, and jumped into that bush. Who wouldn't want to hide from a bunch of soldiers riding beasts toward them?"

"You don't know Harry Heath?" Devin asked. Dib and Tak both raised their eyebrows.

"Never met him." Dib replied

"What do you know of A.P. Hill?" The general asked.

"I don't know where that is." Dib said, confused. The general nodded to Devin.

"At ease." The colonel ordered. The men lowered their weapons. The general and Devin dismounted and walked up to Dib and Tak.

"We're sorry about that, youngsters." The general said. "With the enemy so near, we can't take any chances. I'm General John Buford. This is Colonel Devin, one of my best field officers. To whom do I owe this pleasure?"

"Huh?" Dib said. "Oh. My name is Dib Membrane, and this is Tak." General Buford squinted an eye.

"Awful strange names people a' givin kids these days." Buford said. "Strange outfits too. Where you all from?"

"Pretty far from here." Dib replied, avoiding the question. "But what we'd like to know is where are we?"

"Left home, eh?" Devin asked. "Well, if you're going to run off and wander about and try to live on your own, you'd best know where you are, I guess. You two are a couple miles outside of Gettysburg."

"Gettysburg…" Dib repeated in a whisper.

"Um…we came into this area last night…" Tak lied, using her information-gathering training. "The guy that dropped us off didn't tell us much about where he dropped us off, and we've come really far in the last couple of days." She looked at Dib. "Are we still even in the same state?"

"Pennsylvania?" General Buford asked.

"Okay." Tak said. Dib thought on this for a moment. Gettysburg Pennsylvania…soldiers on horseback…a war…It suddenly struck him, and his legs felt weak. He realized to his horror that they'd been stranded in the middle of the bloodiest battle in the Civil War.

"We have to move out." Buford said. "And I'm sorry, but given the circumstances, I reckon I gotta take you two with me." Dib looked around at the still-armed men, eying them cautiously.

"Do we…really have a choice?" He asked.

"No other that you'd be interested in." Buford replied with a slight smile. Two of the soldiers half-helped, half-forced Dib and Tak onto their horses before climbing on.

"Troop!" Devin called. "Mount up." A bugler played a call on his horn, and all the horsemen climbed onto their steeds and holstered their weapons.

"We'll set up overlooking the Chambersburg Pike." Buford said to Devin. "We'll have a good position near the Seminary, and get online, maybe we can stall the Rebs from coming into town until Reynolds shows up."

"Tak?" Dib said from his seat on the horse next to Tak's. She looked at him, hearing the fear in his voice.

"What, Dib?" She asked. The boy had a look of worry on his face, and she could sense his apprehension.

"This is gonna get bad."