This is just a different start to the one-shot previously shown. It's from Sakura's perspective instead of Syaoran's. I wanted to squeeze it into the actual story, but with the song and all, there was no room. So, here it is!

It's so special that it gets its own little chapter.

X X X

It had been raining, but no rainbow gleamed in the darkness. The sky was gun-metal grey and a cold wind blew, howling like something alive. The world smelled: trashy, grimy, dirty, like death and sorrow and pain. Cars screamed by on the deserted street below the grungy ash-colored apartment building.

She was coming home late, exhausted, face gaunt, grey, and drawn like that of a corpse. Clutching her coat closed to guard against the chill and ignoring the ribbons of her skirt at her legs, Sakura dragged herself into the disgusting place.

You brought that bottle home in a paper sack

She set the bag down on the wobbly table and pulled back a chair for herself. Groaning in anguish, she heaved her crippled leg onto the chair next to her and stared at the gleaming metal brace. Her leg looked thin and weak and sickly inside of it, lost to the brutal intensity of the metal and black cloth.

Drew the blinds and locked the doors

She limped the expanse of the ugly room, stepping over weak spots in the grubby floor. Kurogane, Fai, Mokona, and that Syaoran would be home soon, but she didn't care. She locked the door and drew the heavy greasy blinds.

Then, she went to Fai's spotless kitchen and got down a glass. She returned to the table, dragging her leg behind her in exhaustion. Dropping into the chair again, she poured the first shot of the burning alcohol and drank it in one clean hacking burning gulp.

And there's nothing but empty there inside that glass

For a moment, she stared at it, knowing that what she was doing was a bad idea, but she didn't care enough to stop.

So you pour a little more

Fill and drain. Fill and drain. Pour and sip. Pour and sip. Empty to full. Half-full, half-empty.

Her mind felt hazy and thick, slow as snow, as clotted blood spreading across both Syaorans' white chests.

Her jade-green eyes burned.

And there's no one there to judge you

She was so completely and totally alone here. Kurogane couldn't glower at her, Fai couldn't offer her comfort, Mokona wouldn't be cuddling against that Syaoran on the sofa, that Syaoran wouldn't be staring at her with those beautiful straight-forward amber eyes of his.

At least that's what you tell yourself, but…

So completely alone.

Tears burned in her eyes, threatened to spill. She couldn't feel her leg, her skin was tight and painful, her body felt too large for her soul. There was a sucking, gaping hole in her chest where her heart should have been.

Don't you know
Nobody drinks alone?

God, she wanted her Syaoran back! That was all she wanted, just him.

Every demon, every ghost

He was her demon and her ghost. He was everything to her and now he was gone.

Gone!

Gone, gone, gone, gone!

Vanished.

Just poof.

From your past

She didn't remember why she needed him so much, why he was so precious to her. Yes, he was getting hurt and working so hard to restore her memories to her. He had to be more. He just had to be.

But she would never know now.

Never know, because he was gone!

And every memory you've held back

A clone, the word just was lost on her. How could he be fake? Was everything she felt for him fake, too? Was his dedication to her all farce?

A clone.

A clone…?

Follows you home

Sometimes, all she wanted was to go to this new Syaoran. She wanted to touch his face, feel his heartbeat, thread her fingers through his soft chocolate hair, breathe the scent of his skin. She wanted to find similarities between them.

She wanted to trust him, need him, as she had the clone of him.

Nobody drinks alone…

X X X

First, drop a review and let me know what you think! Are the characters way out of character? Does everybody hate everyone? Think I torture everyone way too much (but it's because he's so easy to be mean to, though there's no real happy ending in this story!)? Are permanently disgusted and can no longer even watch Tsubasa thanks to me? Loved it? Hated it? Are scared for life because of all the drinking? (Flames will be used to roast marshmallows and weenies!) Think I need to do more editing before I post chapters? Post to slow? Yada, yada, yada…

Also, please, check out my first ORIGINAL NOVEL! The Breaking of Poisonwood by Paradise Avenger. (Summary: People were dead. When Skye Davis bought me at a slave auction as a birthday present for his brother, I had no idea what my new life was going to be like, but I had never expected this. It all started when Venus de Luna was killed and I was to take her place, to become the new savior… Then, bad things happened and some people died. In the heart of the earth, we discovered the ancient being that Frank Davis had found and created and used to his advantage. The Poisonwood—)

Questions, comments, concerns?