Wanda sat on the chair with her arms crossed across her chest.
"Name?" the Voice asked cautiously.
"Wanda Maximoff," Wanda answered with sheer boredom.
"Codename?" the Voice asked, if at all possible with even more caution.
Wanda leaned forward a smirk slipping onto her face, "The Scarlet Witch," she said in a low tone.
"Do you have any hobbies or interests to declare?" the Voice asked swallowing a hard lump.
Wanda made a subtle gesture with her hand, "Typical girl things… causing chaos, manipulation, destroying my enemies…" she trailed off a smirk gracing her lips.
"Fire!" the Voice exclaimed in panic, "There is fire coming out of the speakers!"
"I'm a peaceful person, who… just happens to be filled with a violent rage," Wanda said with a shrug.
-Thirty minutes after arriving at S.H.I.E.L.D. Headquarters-
General Fury was pissed. He stood in the middle of a room that was formerly the hangar. He looked at various piles of smoldering scrap metal and turned his attention to the cause of the destruction, "You crashed every vehicle in the hangar! Do you have anything to say for yourselves!?" he exclaimed, eyeing the Brotherhood with his only functional eye.
"Todd can't drive stick," Lance said with a shrug.
"It's true," Todd confirmed with a small nod.
"Yeah, that's nice but why aren't we allowed to have side arms like every other S.H.I.E.L.D. agent ever?" Pietro asked tapping his foot impatiently.
Fury only glared at the speedster.
-Flashback to fifteen minutes ago-
"These are your SHIELD issued side arms, take great care not use them outside of combat situations," a random S.H.I.E.L.D. agent said, distributing firearms to the Brotherhood members.
Todd cocked his side arm and aimed it at Freddy, "Check this out!" he exclaimed as he emptied the entire clip at Freddy.
Freddy began laughing, "Quit it! It tickles!" he shouted as the bullets bounced off his impervious flesh and ricochet into valuable S.H.I.E.L.D. equipment.
"Hey boys check it out! I found where they stashed all the vehicles!" Lance exclaimed pointing to a large room.
-Present Time-
Lance promptly threw up in the wreckage, "I hate flashbacks…" he said wiping his lip.
"Oh yeah…" Pietro said with a surreal smile, "Good times."
"That was fifteen minutes ago!" Fury exclaimed getting into the speedsters face.
"You expect us to remember every time we've caused an organization thousands in property damage?" Pietro asked with a smirk.
"This is all coming out of your paychecks!" Fury exclaimed turning his back on the Brotherhood, "I don't want you to move from this spot until your liaison picks you up!" he then took his leave.
"We're getting paid?" Freddy asked in confusion.
"Well now that I have a pension," Regan said as she reached into her sleeve, "There's no need for this," she then pulled out her bra.
"How the hell did you do that!?" Lance asked in shock, "I need both hands, a circular saw and after twenty minutes of aneurism inducing migraines I start asking for a little teamwork!"
"It's not like all girls can do it either," Wanda said crossing her arms.
"I smell a flashback," Regan sang with a smirk.
Lance held his stomach, "Oh no…"
-Flashback to a happier time-
Two bodies wrestled for dominance beneath a large blanket.
"What's wrong haven't you ever taken off a bra before?" Jean asked from under the blanket.
Wanda threw the blanket off of herself, "Not someone else's!" she exclaimed with a pout.
-Present Time-
Lance emptied his stomach once again into the wreckage, "I hate you guys…" he stated just as a short curvy blonde woman walked into the room.
The blonde looked over the various Brotherhood members and approached Freddy. She stuck out her hand and Freddy shook it meekly.
"My name is Eileen Harsaw and I am your mutant liaison to General Fury," she said in a kind voice, she then walked right up to Freddy, "Judging by your intimidating frame, you must be Lance Alvers."
"Uh… Lance?" Freddy asked in a slight panic.
Lance stepped forward, "I'm Lance," he said crossing his arms in pride.
"Really?" Eileen looked at him from head to toe, "I'm not that impressed," she said with a shrug.
Before Lance could unleash a tremor, Raven stepped forward.
"You said 'mutant', what can you do?" Raven asked sizing up the other woman.
"I can sense and manipulate electromagnetic energy fields," Eileen stated offhandedly.
"What's that mean yo?" Todd asked slinking over to the new woman.
"What Magneto does with metal I do with electricity," Eileen smiled at Todd, "Including bio-electricity," her eyes took on a yellow sheen and Todd dropped to the ground in a twitching heap, "He'll be fine, or what passes as fine for him."
"Hey!" Lance exclaimed stepping in front of the blonde, "When do we get paid?"
Eileen began digging in her pocket; "With all the damages you caused?" she asked flipping a nickel to Lance, "Try to save some of it for that pension."
"I like her," Todd said from the ground, his foot twitching involuntarily.
"Now, I will show you your temporary living quarters," Eileen said motioning for the Hood members to follow her, "After you've rested up, I can take you on a tour and you can meet the other divisions."
-A few hours later in Pietro's private quarters-
Pietro laid on a steel framed bed staring up at the ceiling as a lazy grin donned his face. As was usual for the speedster, he couldn't sleep without the little woman in his bed but alas she was off getting her arm buffed for bed.
A knock rapped at the door gaining the speedster's attention.
Pietro smiled to himself, "You know you don't have to knock right?" he asked pushing himself onto his elbows.
The door swooshed open to reveal the object of Pietro's nightmares.
Carol Danvers, Ms. Marvel stood at the door, "That's so sweet Pietro… I didn't think you still cared," the buxom blonde said, a sinister smirk set upon her face.
"Carol!?" Pietro exclaimed leaping to his feet, "Hey! Uh… I'm kind of involved with someone…"
Carol sighed, "Pietro…" she studied him for a moment, "First that dreadful Goth and now that glorified toaster with a vagina… what am I going to do with you?" she asked slowly closing the gap between them.
Pietro stood tall against the blonde, "Don't ever say that about her again," he warned dangerously.
"Oh, you're so full of fire," she said taking a few steps toward the door, "So am I," with that Carol unleashed a radial wave of energy photon energy.
Pietro had nowhere to run as the room was engulfed by the strange yellow energy. The only thing his amazing speed would allow him to do is sit and wait for the inevitable.
The energy made contact with his chest, thrusting him against the wall with a sickening crack.
Pietro slid to the floor clutching his chest.
Carol smiled down at the speedster, once again closing the gap, "It takes a few days to recharge after that attack but it was well worth it, wouldn't you say?" she asked as Pietro began gasping for air, "Oh… did I break your ribs?"
Pietro couldn't speak, only clutch his chest.
"You know… It doesn't matter how much training you have; a broken rib is a broken rib," she said as she cocked back a leg and sent it flying into his side.
Pietro let out a groan, "Lance… Wanda…" he tried to call out, but only mustered a whisper.
"Oh they can't hear you, lover," she said with a smile, "These rooms are soundproofed for agent privacy," she kicked him one more time, "It's just you and me Pietro."
"Pietro's still trying to talk me into a three way. Guess he got his wish."
"The toaster…" Carol trailed off as she raised her hands in surrender, feeling the cold steel of a Sentinel Cannon poke her in the back, "You know… they have your blueprints on base," she said in a sickeningly sweet tone.
"Why should I care?" Karima asked, a steady hum emanating from her Sentinel Cannon.
In one swift motion, Carol spun around grabbing Karima's forearm with her left hand and palm thrusting Karima in the bicep tearing the artificial appendage from her shoulder, "Your shoulder joint was made in Taiwan," she said a sick smirk on her face.
Karima dropped to her knees, clutching her shoulder in obvious pain.
Carol looked at her with interest then turned her attention to Pietro's gasping form, "How many of your girlfriends do I have to rip apart before you get it?" she asked crossing her arms in annoyance.
"Someone forgot to take their Midol this morning."
Carol whipped around in shock, "How are…"
She was promptly interrupted as Karima shoved her fingers into the blonde's mouth, clutching her jaw with her thumb, "You'll ruin the mood," Karima shushed her then sent every ounce of electricity her cybernetic body could generate through the blonde's body.
After several moments and several thousand volts of electricity, the blonde was finally sent into unconsciousness.
Karima sighed dropping to her knees in pain. She made her way to Pietro, who was now sitting against the wall simply staring at her.
Blood ran from his lips as Karima crawled to the speedster until he could hold her in his arms.
"Are you okay?" she asked weakly.
"I'll heal… what about your arm?" he asked in return, holding her tightly against his body.
"Just… just hold me," was her only response.
-Fifteen minutes later-
"I want her head," an irate Raven said in a dangerous tone, "Lance wants her scalp to hang from his rearview mirror and Wanda wants to traverse time to take it out on her ancestors," she placed her hands on the desk, "What do you plan on doing about it?"
Fury sat behind his desk staring at the blue woman in her teddy, "It's been taken care of," he said in a dark tone that nearly caught Raven off guard.
"You sent her there," Raven said in a much calmer tone.
Fury turned his chair to look out of the window, "S.H.I.E.L.D. now has a base in the Savage Land."