Chapter 10

A/N: I am totally going to finish all of these SM stories, I freaking promise. But as always I need your reviews to keep me motivated. Hint, please review.

Rating: M (for language and dark themes)

Disclaimer: I don't own SM

He sat quietly, the confines of the empty, barren space providing comfort to his mind that was ridden with the prevalent traces of fear and guilt. After learning news of Serena's current predicament, he isolated himself from her fearful gaze, keeping within him the result of their secret union. A child. His child, growing slowly, steadily within her. How could he go before her and look into her eyes, captivating and deep, and tell her that the consequences of their short lived union would cause Serena more pain than she would ever imagine? That her regrets would never overcome her suffering. How could he regale with news of the agony she would endure of both body and mind? And even more than her predicament, he feared for his own, he was the king after all. He had taken a solemn oath of solidarity, vowing to ensure the everlasting purity of their race, to observe their laws, to protect his people. He had forsaken his heritage for her, betrayed the law of his land, opened her to a new world that she should have never been involved in. Now she had to suffer for his weakness. Her and their child.

The fever was overriding her thoughts and as she lay there, trembling in a puddle of sweat, her mind reached out to him. She needed to feel his comforting embrace, his reassurance that she was going to be okay. She hadn't seen him since her appointment with the doctor yesterday and had wondered why he had abandoned her.

In her fatigue she could hear footsteps darting about her room, removing her clothes, placing a warm cloth on her forehead and a female's voice muttering something in a foreign tongue that she could not understand. She wanted to cry out his name, to feel his arms around her, to cling to him as he comforted her in her time of distress. But as her arms flailed about and her back arched in pain, she reached out and touched the cold truth of nothingness. Her consciousness waned momentarily as another bout of sickness came and passed.

She opened her eyes slowly, the moonlight glow greeting her blurry vision as she looked around to find an empty room. Her body was still trembling and her breaths were ragged and harsh. She sat up slowly, clutching her stomach, wiping her brow as her eyes tried to focus on an object in the darkness. She considered trying to crawl toward the door and find her brooding counterpart, but relinquished the thought when another wave of nausea burst within her. She groaned outwardly, closing her eyes and waiting for the spell to cease.

As her stomach settled, she listened intently, her ears focusing on the distant sounds of hustle and bustle as the castle came to life. It must have been just after sunset as the living dead seemed to be rising from their tombs.

Despite the clamoring noise that filled the hallways she heard the sound of persistent treading and knew that it was him coming for her. After what seemed like an eternity of pain and doubt, he was finally coming to comfort her. To lay his hands on her and ensure her that everything was going to be alright.

He entered her room silently, wondering if his presence would wake her. He figured that it wouldn't matter, that if she were sleeping he would wake her regardless, to tell her of their predicament, to inform her of her sentence.

His eyes fell upon her figure, the white silky chemise clinging to her damp body as she watched him, the paleness of her skin glowing in the moonlight. He faltered in the wake of her beauty and wanted nothing more than to drown himself in her glory, forgetting his news and the bleak future that was teetering upon the horizon.

"Where have you been?" It was an accusatory whisper, quiet and powerful. He remained silent and kept his distance, his back against the wooden door. "What's wrong with me?"

He almost chuckled. The poor thing. She probably thought she was ill and that in a few days her torment would pass and they would carry on with their secret fling. He had been avoiding this confrontation with her since he had discovered the news himself. There was no point in keeping things from her any longer; he was only trying to prolong the inevitable.

"You're pregnant." His tone was angry, filled with accepted finality. He might as well say you're pregnant and you're doomed. Don't be happy, this baby is going to ruin your life.

"What? I…you're lying." Disbelief was laced within her voice. Her proclamation wasn't at all accusatory, she simply didn't believe him.

"No, I'm not," he said and frowned.

She stared at him quietly, her breathing coming in sharp, painful breaths. Her stomach knotted, her throat closed, she couldn't focus her mind enough to even find a proper response. "That's impossible. You…I thought-"

"Joshua told me. Four weeks or so."

Four weeks? Four weeks or so to the day that they had first made love. She had conceived that night and had been carrying within her a direct result of their secrecy, their unbridled little tryst. She blinked once, twice, three times. A baby? There was a baby inside her. She looked up to him. He looked angry; she felt defensive.

"Don't blame this on me!" Her voice was low and harsh. "I didn't do this on my own you know."

"I know," Darien said tiredly, rubbing his temple. He was being an ass and he knew it. He had to be, there was no point getting attached to her right now or this baby. There was no reason to imagine what she would look like swollen with his child, to imagine her holding their baby for the first time, to think about its first words or steps. This baby was dead the moment it was conceived.

"You know? That's all you have to say?" Her fists were her shaking with unkempt fury.

"What do you expect me to say?"

Serena was so irritated by his eerie calmness that she could slap him. "What do you expect me to say? I don't know…I didn't even think…" What did she expect him to say? "Tell me, tell me everything is going to be alright. Tell me I'll be okay, that the baby…that we'll both be okay." He turned away from her when she started to cry, heaving sobs, heavy with dread and shame.

"I can't do that Serena," he said solemnly. "You know I can't."

She cried harder. "Why not?"

"Because we never should have…I never should have-"

"But we did! We did and now…I don't…what are we going to do?" Her tears were falling quickly now, tiny little ponds of salty liquid forming small circles on her hands and they clutched and kneaded the blanket that was idly covering her waist.

He sighed. Rubbed the bridge of his nose. Scratched his neck. "Don't get attached."

Don't get attached? She knew what he was referring to. How could she not get attached to something that was growing inside of her? That in a few months, she would feel swimming around in her belly. "How can you say that to me?"

"I'm saying it out of necessity!" It was the first time he had shouted at her tonight. "You can't keep this baby. At best…at best the council will rule in your favor to banish you from the castle, maybe the planet, but-"

"But what?"

"The baby…will be executed."

"You mean, terminated? You mean they're going to force me to have an abortion?"

He grimaced. "No, the council will want to see the child for…various purposes first."

Her stomach tightened as her mind explored the meaning behind his words. "Your council is going to force me to carry my baby to full term just so they can study it? And once they're done, they're just going to kill it? You can't let them do that. You can't let them do that to me or our baby!"

"I don't have a choice!" he screamed, rushing toward the bed until his body was parallel to hers. It was the first time she had seen his face since their meeting began. It was haggard and sallow and there was a definite puffiness to his eyes, a sadness that betrayed his dismissive attitude.

"Bull shit! You're the king of the whole fucking planet!" she yelled, balling her fists beside her. "Tell them that they can't have this baby!"

"Which makes what I've done even worse! There are laws about this Serena, to prevent this from happening, there's a council of elders, and there are repercussions for breaking those laws."

"Even for the king?"

"Especially for the king. I promised…I promised that I would never…." He put his head in his hands, the corner of his eyes stinging. He had betrayed the memories of his father and mother and those who had come before them. For a moment he had lost sight of his destiny and now she would pay for it. "I'm sorry, there's no other way. You must meet with the council…tell them about the child from your own lips. We'll take the matter from there."

She frowned, trying to form words, but barely being able to breathe made talking considerably difficult. "What's going to happen to us, to you?"

He sighed. "I don't know. They'll probably send you away to have the baby, away from me and I…I'll be relinquished of my title. They may let Raye rule, if she finds a reasonable suitor to rule with her."

She had cost him his throne. There was the brutal truth of it all. Her baby was going to die, she was going to be probably held in some form of captivity and Darien would be exiled. The world was crumbling before them, burning and turning to ash as they watched and there was nothing they could do about it.

"You'd better get dressed," said Darien, turning away from her. "The council's expecting you."

He turned away quickly, exiting the room before she could even respond. Serena clutched her belly and cried out. Cried for her unborn child whose fate was already sealed, cried for her king who had lost it all because of her, and cried for what she knew the future would undoubtedly bring.

Their eyes were boring into her, watchful and full of disgust and disdain over the abomination that was growing within her. She sat still under their watchful eye as they whispered and hissed above her. They could see her from every angle; the circular room provided an unyielding view from every seat of polished wood that sat high above her.

"Silence," cried Tiberius, the eldest man and leader of the high council. He peered over her, his hooked nose making his sneer all the more prevalent as he waited for the room to quiet. "I expect you know the fate you have brought upon yourself and your…child."

Serena nodded. "Then you will take your punishment with haste and without struggle. Your lack of self control has brought this sentence upon you and your child. Weep for the poor choices you have made and not for the ball of sin that is writhing in your womb." The man paused, turning to Darien at his far right. The boy's face was stoic, pale. He felt for him, he had befriended her and she had committed the most ultimate of crimes. "You are hereby banished to the mining guild of Embria. As you love the human slaves so much, you are sentenced to rot with them until the birth of your fetus. After which you will return to the castle for the trial and execution of said infant."

She remained quiet, willing the tears to remain within her. They were savage animals, just as she had thought. In her weakness, she had let Darien try to convince her otherwise. But they cannot deny their true nature and neither could she.

"A question remains, for you are not the only culprit in this crime. Which one of our men had let himself succumb to your wiles? Which dog did you lead astray? Who, Serena, is the father of your child?"

Darien waited quietly for her omission. He would take his sentence calmly; he had resolved to serve his punishment willfully. "I am both the mother and father of this child, as I am both the nurturer and the executioner, as my body is the womb for my baby and the coffin."

He shivered at words, and shocked at her omission of his name. What was she doing? If she didn't tell them it was he who impregnated her things would get far worse, for everyone.

"You choose insolence then?" asked Tiberius, leaning back in his chair and watching the girl as she sat stoically beneath him, the iron chains of her binds resting heavily against her thighs.

"This burden to bear is mine alone, I will relinquish to exile with my child, and love the creation in my womb as long as I can. And even though my baby will not know life, at least it will know that its mother loved it." She looked to Darien at her final omission. There was a questioning look in his eye.

"You will tell the council who the father is or you will suffer the consequences. Pregnant or not I will have you flogged."

Serena laughed, a bitter chuckle of amusement and resentment. "You will take everything from me soon. Am I to fear a bit of pain when eight months from now I will breathe agony for an eternity? Do you worst elder. I have no fear."

Tiberius smirked. She was strong and stubborn. He admired her for that. "As you wish, human. Bring in the-"

"Enough," said Darien, rising in his chair. His voice was tired. "She will not be flogged, nor touched by anyone in this audience. Her will is brave and she is resolute, but she cannot and will not take the blame on her own. I-"

"Yes, my lord, she will," she said, staring pointedly at him. "Let my suffering appease the anger of your gentleman and your gods. Why break a man when his spirit is already broken? He is losing a woman that he loves, and a child with her, that they created out of love. Let her grant this final gift to him. That he may continue with his life without castigation and fulfill whatever destiny that lays in wake before him. For he is man of character who is meant to do great things."

He understood the meaning in her words. She was trying to take the fall for him, to prevent his exile. He shook his head at her as his eyes stung. After all she was facing, after the way he reacted towards her; she was still trying to protect him. It made this simple fact that he loved her so, and their child so, cause him to tremble at the thought of living without them both. But she continued to stare at him and he knew her will was set and that only death would break it.

"Serena has spoken," said Tiberius. "We will find the man by, other means. Take her into custody and remove her from my sight. She shall be shipped to the mining guild. Tomorrow."

Darien watched as they removed Serena from the room in chains, wanting nothing more than to free her from her confines. And as the final elder left the room, he found himself on his knees, his palms pressing into the ground as he sobbed painful tears, crying out loudly into the darkness, shaking as he let the most ultimate of agony overtake him in the stillness of the empty room.

"Why?" he asked, approaching the iron bars and focusing on the woman dressed in white as she sat atop the filthy dungeon floor.

She laughed bitterly. "Why do you think?"

"I never asked you to do this," he said desperately, clutching the bars, his lips trembling as tears fell from his eyes.

"There's going to be enough suffering, Darien," she said.

"I'm so sorry," he sobbed against the bars. "I'm so sorry."

"Are you?" she asked, looking at him, her gaze harsh. "You didn't even try to defend me. You didn't even ask them to spare our child. Calling out for mercy for me would not have been an admission of your guilt!"

"Serena, there are laws that ban this kind of thing. Laws that have been around before time was time," he said.

"Fine," she said sternly, catching his gaze. "But don't think what I did absolve you from what you didn't do. You just sat there and watched them condemn our baby to death without as much of a flinch. I will never forgive you for that. I never want to see you again, I never want to hear your voice again. Years from now when I die, I will die hating for you for what happened tonight."

He opened his mouth to find the words to express his remorse, his shame, the desperation he was feeling, but she had already turned her back to him. He watched her for a moment before sinking against the bars, his head resting upon his knees, his tears flowing freely. He had lost her; he had lost everything.

He would never get the chance to make things right.