Wow! You guys have waited a bit for this. It's a bit longer than I thought it'd be, so does that make up for the wait and the seriousness of the last chapter?

How about the fact that I hope to have another chappie up on Friday? Ha! And I'd like to have it finsied by the time I'm back at school... which is only a week away so...

Read on! Read until your dreams come true!

Pride and Prejudice: Abbreviated and Un-fabricated

Potato.

I walked into the meeting room humming a little tune and contemplating the squeaky noise my new black shoes make when I walk. I'd been doing a fair bit of shopping lately and had a whole new wardrobe picked out. Unfortunately my mood has been so bleak that most of my new clothes are plain black. So there I am, walking into the meeting room in my black clothes and heavy black eyeliner, humming the tune to "My Girl."

I had been sitting, quite complacently, in my usual chair when Miranda coughed and I looked up to notice everyone staring at me. Well… everyone except Adam, who was staring at Sarah Golden, but as soon as Miranda noticed this she kicked him under the table and his eyes snapped to me.

It was quite a disarming effect. I stopped humming right in the middle of the chorus and the only noise in the room was the squeak of my new black shoes- which are super cute, by the way!

Miranda coughed again.

"What's going on?" I asked, half eyeing them suspiciously, half eyeing my shoes. They're just so pretty I could stare at them for hours!

"An intervention." Miranda was obviously relishing in controlling the room. I gave her another four minutes before she broke out the hand cuffs and started chaining people to their chairs so she could maintain authority forever. The thought of Miranda chaining people to their desks and whipping them made me laugh, but Miranda's glare was so intense that I quickly stopped.

"Good!" I was quite excited. I'd never been to an intervention before. I turned seriously to Adam and knew exactly what I should say. "Adam," I threw a hefty amount of compassion into my voice to make sure he wasn't offended. "I know you love Jell-O, but the rampant amount of sugar is causing you to get a bit edgy… and kind of gassy. Cut back on the juice man, for all our sake!"

Adam looked quite confused… not that this was much of a difference. "I've been gassy?" he asked Sarah, the hurt evident in his voice.

"Yeah sweetie," I said. "But we'll get through this together. Once you get past the pudding withdrawal, you'll be a whole new man."

Miranda stared, quite angrily. I had another frightening image of handcuffs… except this time they were pink and fuzzy. Hmm, those would probably feel soft against my skin, but they'd clash horribly with my black monotony.

"Carly! This isn't an intervention for Adam's Jell-O addiction!" Miranda shouted eventually. She was quite domineering and had been so angered that I'd taken control of the intervention that she was shaking in rage.

"Oh right! I forgot… that's scheduled for tomorrow." That was a stupid thing for me to forget. But wait! If Adam's intervention is tomorrow… then whose intervention was this? My brow creased in confusion. For a second I was worried that I looked like Adam, all blank faced and googly-eyed, but that moment passed as soon as Sarah Golden spoke.

"Carly, this is your intervention," she said sweetly. I would have been shocked and angry had Sarah's tone not been so compassionate and sugary, so instead I was merely shocked.

"For me?" I gasped. The room nodded. "W-why?"

Miranda snapped her fingers and pointed to Adam. Adam jumped, muttered a quick, "Oh right. I forgot I'm first," and pulled out a small note card. "Carly," he read robotically. That was the intervention we had scheduled for Friday: Adam's robot voice. It seems to take over his body every time he reads. "You have seemed sad lately." He stopped and smiled triumphantly.

"What?" Miranda screeched. "Adam! That's all you have?"

Adam shrugged and looked embarrassed. Miranda glared and finally laid her pair of handcuffs on the table. (Exactly four minutes after the intervention had begun… Who called it?!) I knew she had them because she never leaves the house without them, but I was still shocked to find that they were pink and fuzzy. How cool is that? I'm pretty sure this means I can see the future. Although… if that were true, you'd think I'd have seen this intervention coming. Miranda tapped her handcuffs and Adam's eyes widened in fear.

Sarah Golden then looked off her pink flowery notepad and began to read. "Carly, I'm a bit worried about you. The black you wear, although very slimming, speaks volumes about your disposition. We just want to see you happy again, sweetheart. Whatever- or whoever- it is that has you so upset, we just want to help you fix, so we have convinced administration-"

"That means me!" Adam pointed out proudly, but shut up when Miranda tapped her handcuffs.

"And decided you should go on assignment in France to help you get over the corporate blues." Sarah smiled her golden grin and passed a plane ticket across the table to me, ignoring Adam as if he weren't present and having a mental staring contest with a pair of pink, fuzzy handcuffs.

"France?" I asked in awe. I once dreamed I went to France and the locals threw French fries at me and called me and evil senorita… which makes no sense since "senorita" is totally a German word.

"Oh shut up. It's my turn!" Miranda bellowed. She read her note off the back of her hand because Miranda never seems to find paper when she needs it. "Carly, you gothic whore. Get over yourself, cheer up, and go to France so you can bump-uglies with our sexy boss and get over him. We're all a bit tired of your lovesick stupor so please just leave." She stared rigidly at me. "Leave!" she shouted after a few minutes of my staring back.

"Leave?" I asked dumbly.

"Yes," Miranda commanded. "Right now!" I just sat there. Miranda grabbed her handcuffs and stood up, coming toward me. "LEAVE!"

Needless to say, I got out of that building quite quickly. It's too bad really- I was rather looking forward to the Jell-O intervention…