A/N: I changed the name of this story because I discovered another SasuNaru story that was also called "Missing Pieces" (it's by RosaLui. You should totally go look it up, it's awesomesauce.) Hers is much better, and so it wins the name. I apologize for any confusion, dear reader(s?)

As always, reviews are cherished and held dearly for all time to come. Eheh, but I never reply to reviews... too lazy...

In Which People are Jackasses

Naruto reached out with his hand. "Now help me up." Sasuke chewed his lower lip for a moment before raising his foot and stomping it back down on Naruto's hand.

"Ow!" Naruto exclaimed angrily, glaring up at Sasuke. "Bastard. I have enough bruises already without you adding to the mix."

But Sasuke didn't seem to care. Naruto inspected his face and realized that the guy looked fucking pissed. There was a vein popping out on his forehead, and his jaw was set.

"Holy shit. You think I did it on purpose, don't you?" Naruto managed to get himself up and smack Sasuke lightly across his head. "And you call me a moron. I was three. See, my dad was a policeman, and his gun –"

"I don't care."

Naruto stopped short. "Just a few minutes ago, you were demanding that I explain to you why people think I'm a devil child. Now you're telling me to shut up. Hey, are you bipolar or something? Not that I care, I mean, Sakura's told me on occasion that she thinks I have ADD, but – oh my god, I just realized that your hair sort of looks like a duck's ass!"

Sasuke turned around slowly and walked away, and Naruto remembered that he was supposed to be the angry one here.

"Not so fast!" he shouted, but Sasuke kept walking. "I wanted to fight you, and I still do!"

Sakura had probably already left for the university by now. Crap.

"Go home," Sasuke called back. "They said you were a good fighter, but you're just a moron. Waste of time."

"Huh? Who said what?" Naruto shook his head in confusion, and then the last part of Sasuke's sentence registered in his brain.

"Hey!" he managed to make his aching legs move, running until he caught up with Sasuke. He grabbed a hold of the white-clad shoulder so that Sasuke had to stop, but he still avoided Naruto's eyes.

"You can call me a moron if you want." Naruto's eyes were narrowed, and his voice was quieter than usual. "But don't you ever call me a waste. Got that?"

Sasuke shrugged off his hand and continued on in the opposite direction.

"Bastard!"

"Why don't you come up with a larger variety of insults, moron?"

…

Sakura, Naruto discovered when he made it back to her house, had already left. Her mother would probably be waking up soon too, so Naruto retreated back to his own home.

Iruka was waiting for him there, and when he saw the bruises covering Naruto, his jaw unhinged.

"Wha – you – I" He stopped spluttering only to throw his hands up in disbelief, giving the sky a 'what did I do wrong?' look.

He sighed and motioned toward the couch, going over to the fridge to get Naruto some ice.

"Think you'll be okay?"

"Yeah. Nothing fatal."

Iruka handed Naruto a baggy of ice, and Naruto smiled gratefully. He put it on a black-and-purple spot on his stomach, wincing at first, but soon the area became numb.

"And you were doing so well at the whole 'avoiding fights' thing." Iruka muttered. "I thought you'd grown up."

"Wasn't my fault."

"It never is, is it?"

"Look," Naruto said defensively, "I'm eighteen now. A legally independent, responsible adult. You can't ground me, or whatever."

"Ah, but you still live in my house."

"It wasn't my fault!" Iruka rolled his eyes.

"Really, it wasn't. I just – uh, made a morning trip to Wegman's, and Tayuya attacked me!" Iruka still didn't look quite convinced.

"Really! She's crazy! She practically worships Orochimaru. Scratch the practically part. She flunked her SAT's, so she felt the need to take it out on the 'spawn-o'-satan'." He looked up at his legal guardian hopefully, begging the man with his eyes to understand. Iruka seemed to come to a decision in his mind, and he nodded.

"I'll go make you some ramen." He stood up, but before going into the kitchen, he asked: "Didn't you just go to Wegman's yesterday? What were you doing there today?"

"Uh – erm, I was, uh –" Naruto was not that skilled at lying. He took a deep breath, then said it all in one rush: "I was supposed to meet this guy for a fist fight."

Iruka's shoulders sunk a little bit, and then he went into the kitchen to make Naruto his ramen.

…

As Naruto sucked the noodles into his mouth like some kind of living, breathing vacuum, Iruka was tapping his fingers gently on the living room coffee table.

"Did you propose the fight, or did he?"

"…"

Iruka snatched the ramen bowl away.

"Alright, already! It was my idea! But only because –"

"No 'buts'. You were right; you're much too old for me to be grounding you. Instead, you're going to apologize to this boy."

Naruto stared at him in disbelief. Apologize? To Sasuke? The very thought made him gag.

"But… I don't even know his phone number!" he lied.

"That's good, because you won't be apologizing over the phone; too impersonal. You'll make a sincere apology to his face."

"Don't know where he lives."

"Then find out. Until you do, no ramen." Iruka stood up and went back into the kitchen. Naruto cringed as he heard box after box of ramen hit the inside of the garbage can.

"We'll buy more once you make this right."

"I'll just buy my own," Naruto muttered angrily.

"And I'll throw it away," Iruka said. He didn't sound angry anymore, but he looked determined; "You've got to learn to respect people more, Naruto. You'll never go anywhere in life – let alone become the Mayor of this town – if you don't get it through your head that a) people are jackasses, and b) you've got to accept them for all their jackassery, because chances are, you're a jackass too."

"What an inspiring speech."

"I try my best."

Naruto stared at the ice pack resting on his stomach. "You really think apologizing to this guy will get me any closer to mayor-dom?"

Iruka nodded, and Naruto groaned. "Fine. I'll do it."