Pride and Prejudice: Abbreviated and Un-fabricated

The second part of Phlegm. Double the Phlegm.

"Sometimes I wish I had a lightsabre."

"What?" Danny asked as he set down his espresso. Danny drinking espresso is a funny image. They gave him one of those tiny little cups with the cute little saucer. He looks like a giant living in the Top Secret Elf Kingdom. But then I remind myself that Danny probably doesn't even know about the Elf Kingdom. That's why they have the "top secret" in there. I'm one of the few who know… and only because I'm part fairy and elves really like fairies. Do you think that Danny's part gnome? They say gnomes are telekinetic…

"How do you know French?" I asked, hastily changing the topic of conversation. I didn't want to hint too much about the Top Secret Elf Kingdom just in case Danny might be a part gnome. Gnomes and elves don't get along too well.

"My mother was French," Danny replied taking a sip of his miniature cup that he stole from the elves. And gnomes wonder why elves hate them…

"Oh really?" I hadn't known that. "I thought she was from Lithuania."

Danny smiled and laughed softly, which was weird… was I unintentionally making a joke? We have confirmation. Danny has had a lobotomy.

"She grew up in Paris and met my father when she was doing her schooling in America," he informed me.

"So your dad was from Lithuania?" I asked.

"What? Carly no. No one I know is from Lithuania. Just American." He took another sip from his miniature cup. Sometimes I seriously wonder how they make cups that small. Honestly, it would be impossible if not for magic. Magic is the greatest thing ever. That's why I need a lightsabre. "What about you?"

"No. I'm not from Lithuania." That was a silly question for him to ask.

Danny shook his head sadly. "Carly! I mean, what's your story?"

"Oh." Honestly? How was I supposed to get that from his ambiguous question? "Um. I was born. I went to school. I went to college. I worked at a newspaper with a very jerky boss the next thing I know I'm here. And the rest is still being written."

"Hmm. That was oddly specific."

I laughed. Who knew Danny could be funny?

"So the jerky boss. Was that me or… or-"

"Stephen?" I asked. He nodded. "You were a pretty good boss."

"Were?" he asked. He seemed quite confused by my tense. In truth I hardly thought of Danny as my brooding boss anymore. It's hard to consider someone as the person that pays you when all you want to do is kiss them… except maybe if you're like a you-know-what. (Notice: That's a You-Know-What not You-Know-Who… but I do think that Voldermort might complete that sentence as well.)

I shrugged to Danny and, once again, spoke without thinking, "Danny have you ever been in love?"

Danny's eyes became comically wide and his cheeks turned a flaming shade of pink. But, before he could answer… or stutter for a prolonged period of time, a man came up to our table and held out a bright pink rose that, ironically enough, was the exact same shade as Danny's cheeks. "Une fleur pour votre amour?" he asked Danny.

Danny looked at me and I smiled, trying to remain composed, even though I had no clue what the man had said. Danny turned back to the man with the flower and said, again in perfect French, "Regardez-la. Une fleur limiterait la comparaison."

The man smiled and nodded, while laughing softly he muttered, "Vrai. Vrai," and walked away. I got the unmistakable feeling that he was laughing at me. I blushed almost as pink as Danny was, out of pure mortification. Danny didn't want me to get that flower and obviously didn't still like me. I was a complete idiot for thinking that Danny could forgive me and like me again, and this stupid French café suddenly seemed very cold, and I just wanted to go home and take a nap under my desk like I normally did for lunch.

"Danny, can we go now?" I asked, standing up abruptly and walking out of the Café. I just wanted to go back to America now, where there are no raisin-y old men that won't let you eat grapes, or men that laugh at you when the guy you like won't get you a flower.

I'm no French… speaker, but I know what "amour" means. And I am obviously not Danny Dardy's. But, I tried to tell myself, I'd have rather have a lightsabre anyway…

What the flower man says is: "A flower for your love?"

Danny says: "Look at her. A flower would pale in comparison."

And "Vrai" means "true."

All together now… Awwwwwww!

... Short Chap? Ya. I know... :(