&&&
The next day saw Rahne and Tabby standing at the door of the Institute with packed bags, waiting to be transported to the Pit. The others stood with them and waited for the Misfits to show up.
"So, this is it!" Tabby said excitedly. Rahne nodded. Sam just looked glum at the prospect. "Aww Sammy," Tabitha said as she noticed. "Are you going to miss me?"
"Yeah, I guess I am." Sam said dourly.
"Isn't that sweet?" Tabby crooned as she hugged Sam's face to her chest.
"Ahem." Storm coughed in disapproval.
"Spoilsport." Tabby sighed as she let go. "I'll see you soon Sammy."
"We'll miss you—especially me." Sam told her. "And you too Rahne." Rahne nodded and gave a weak grin.
Lina appeared via the Mass Device a moment later with her own bags. "Hi." She waved.
"Hey Lina!" Rahne and Tabitha waved.
"You ready to go?" She asked.
"As we'll ever be, I guess." Rahne answered honestly.
"Well, I brought you both a teleportation watch. The Pit's location is already programmed into it. You just have to hit the button and there you are."
"Thanks." Rahne and Tabby accepted their watches.
"Bye everyone, but have no fear. Boom Boom will be back!"
"That's what we're afraid of." Someone groaned. Still waving and calling good-bye, Rahne and Tabby disappeared, Lina turned to the X-Men.
"Welcome to the Institute." Professor Xavier said warmly. "I trust your stay will be a pleasant one. The students are all very happy to have you here." He wasn't just being polite. Several of the boys in particular were very looking forward to having Lina—an attractive and gentle soul—live with them and having Tabitha and Rahne (who could beat any of the guys up as needed) absent for a while.
"I'll take your bags!" Bobby said eagerly.
"No, I will!" Ray argued.
"I'll show you to you're room." Everett offered.
"Over my dead body!"
A small scuffled broke out as the boys started fighting for the privilege of taking Lina up to her room—formerly Rahne's.
"Don't worry." Jamie told her as he clapped his hands and created half a dozen clones. "We'll take you bags and show you up to your room."
"Why, thank you." Lina smiled warmly as she planted a kiss on his cheek. "You're sweet."
A blushing but beaming Jamie squad quickly took possession of Lina's bags and escorted her in. The boys who had been fighting glared balefully at him.
"Lousy squirt." Ray grumbled.
"He gets all the breaks." Bobby groaned.
"And here I thought that there would be less fighting with Lina here instead of Boom Boom and Wolfsbane." Logan winced.
"I wonder what the Misfits have planned for them." Hank wondered.
&&&
As it happens, Rahne and Tabby appeared at the Pit, just in front of the Misfit's home. They looked at each other and then again at the Manor, which for some reason had a strange banner strung across the front. "Welcome to the Misfit's Happiness Hotel." Rahne read. "What's that about?" Tabitha shrugged.
"Knowing those guys, it could be anything. We might as well go in since there isn't a welcoming party out here."
"You first."
Tabitha opened the door. When nothing happened to her Rahne followed. Just inside was a peculiar sight—as if there were another kind in Misfit Manor. It was Todd standing behind a makeshift desk with a clipboard and a bell.
"Are you checking in?" Todd asked. Rahne looked at Tabitha questioningly, hoping she would have some idea of what was going on. Tabitha shrugged.
"Yes…we're checking in." She confirmed. Todd smiled and hit the bell on the desk.
"HEY! Somebody's checking in!" Todd shouted up the stairs. The rest of the Misfits poked their heads out of their rooms.
"Somebody's checking in?" They chorused. From somewhere music started to play. Rahne looked confused but Tabitha seemed willing to go along with it.
Todd's started bobbing his head from side to side and started to sing. "Oh there's no fire in the fireplace, there's no carpet on the floor…Don't try to order dinner, there's no kitchen anymore—" He pointed into the kitchen where Wanda was hexing all the appliances to chase after Pietro and wreck the place. "But if the road's been kind of bumpy and you need to rest a spell—"
"Well welcome home, to the Happiness Hotel!" All the Misfits sang together.
"Is this what it was like living with the Brotherhood?" Rahne asked Tabby.
"Pretty much." Tabby agreed.
"Hey, how are you guys fixing to pay?" Todd asked.
"What are our choices?" Tabby inquired.
"A) credit card, b) cash, c) sneak out in the middle of the night." Tabby pretended to think it over.
"Hmm…we'll take 'c,'"
"Very popular choice." Todd commented as he snagged a fly out of their air with his tongue.
Trinity flew over and grabbed their bags. Before they could say a word, Trinity had flown off again.
"If you've got luggage keep it handy but you're runnin' out of luck, cause the bellhops ain't too organized and the elevator's stuck." Lance sang as Trinity fought amongst themselves over who would carry the luggage to what room.
"So if you don't mind friendly animals—" Angelica continued as Polly flew past with a beer can in his claws and Shipwreck chasing after him.
"And can learn to stand the smell—" Althea chimed in as she held Barney and Claudius in her arms, both of whom badly needed a diaper change.
"Well welcome home, to the Happiness Hotel!" They all chorused again.
"Tabby, I'm starting to wonder if this was a good idea…" Rahne said.
"Why?" Tabby questioned.
"Welcome home!" Half the Misfits continued, "Welcome home!" The other half chorused. "Welcome home! Welcome home! No matter where you wander you will never do as well!"
"Okay the lobby's looking shabby and it's got the wrong address—" Pietro admitted.
"And the whole dang thing has been condemned by American Express." Shane added. Spyder went next.
"Still the management is cheerful though the whole joint's gone to hell!"
"Well welcome home, to the Happiness Hotel!
"So you guys live here now?" Tabby asked Todd.
"Yeah but only when we're not kicking Cobra butt or hanging around Xavier's."
"So that means that you're hardly ever here?"
"Something like that." He admitted.
"Oh there are bugs." Arcade sang.
"There are bugs." Todd licked his lips.
"And there are lice." Trinity chimed in.
"There are lice." Todd repeated happily.
"Sure, we have our little problems, but you'll never beat the price!" Fred proclaimed.
"You've got every kind of critter." Tabitha said as she cuddled Baby Beaky, breaking into song as well.
"You've got every kind of pest." Rahne agreed as she warily eyed Pietro kissing his reflection in a mirror.
"But we treat 'em all as equals just like any other guest!" Todd promised.
"Though you're cleaner than the others, still as far as we can tell…" The Misfits started up again. "…You'll fit right in at the Happiness Hotel!"
"We'll fit right in!" Tabby sang as she put her arm around a now thoroughly daunted Rahne and sang.
"At the Happiness Hotel!" Everyone save Rahne concluded dramatically. Beach Head, attracted by all the noise, poked his head in the door and looked around. He shook his head.
"You are all…weirdoes!" Beach Head pronounced before closing the door again.
"He said it!" Rahne groaned.
&&&
A/N: With respect and apologies to Jim Henson.
