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"You're telling us that Arcade got sucked inside his computer?" Cover Girl asked. The Misfits had immediately brought Arcade's disappearance to the attention of the Handlers.
"I warned him that he was spending too much time in front of his computer." Spirit said.
"Well, there's no doubt, we've got to get him out." Roadblock added.
"Maybe if we break the screen…" Shipwreck suggested as he unholstered his pistol.
"NO!" Everyone shouted at him.
"Maybe we should call Dr. Strange." Wanda suggested. "Magic Arcade out."
"Or one of our computer geniuses." The Blind Master suggested.
"Present!" Trinity grinned.
"I said geniuses, not maniacs." The Blind Master said firmly.
"Do you think Forge—never mind, dumb idea." Tabby said.
"Yeah, we want to HELP Arcade here." Fred agreed.
"Maybe if we—" Todd started. Althea rolled her eyes and casually pressed the 'escape' key. The screen started to glow and Arcade flew out, landing none-too gracefully on the floor.
"Why didn't I think of that?" Shipwreck wondered as he scratched his head.
"Because Dad, your brain is like the four headed, man-eating haddock fish beast of Milwaukee." Althea explained.
"In what way?"
"It doesn't exist."
"Wow, what a rush!" Arcade breathed.
"Are you all right?" Angelica asked.
"What happened?" Spyder asked.
"Are you real or a digital projection?" Spyder asked.
"Maybe we should call Lifeline." Low Light said. Arcade held up his hands to ward off the questions and concerns.
"You guys, come on I'm fine! There's no need to freak out!" Suddenly an electrical worked its way around Arcade. The Misfits and Handlers shielded their eyes. When they looked again, they saw Arcade wearing a red one-piece jumpsuit with white gloves and boots and on the chest a black circle with a gold 'F!' emblazoned on it. He was also wearing a black mask around his eyes. Arcade's hair stood up straight as if he had been electrocuted, with a white streak going along either side. But most shockingly, his skin had turned bright blue.
"Arcade? Is that you?" Tabby gaped.
"Wow…this is super neato!" Arcade said as he looked himself over. "Let's wrestle!" He shouted as he leapt on Pietro.
"Get off me!"
"Say, 'I'm a little tugboat!'" Arcade said as he sat on Pietro's back and bent his leg back in a hold.
"I'm a tug—boat!" Pietro gasped as he pounded his fists on the floor. "Get him off!"
"Aw nut bunnies!" He grumbled. "I wanted more of a challenge!"
"Arcade, what—" Althea started to ask.
"Will you go out with me?" Arcade asked.
"WHAT?!" Althea, Todd, and Shipwreck exclaimed. Far away Amira shuddered and got so mad that she punched Bobby in the face.
"No! I'm in love with Toddles!" Althea shouted.
"What? After all this time, you were just stringing me on?" Arcade said in a wounded voice.
"Hey! Who do you think I am? Kitty?" Althea asked indignantly.
"If this were an after-school special, ooh, you'd pay a bittersweet price for your little deceit, like getting big oily zits! Or eating off the same plate as David Lee Roth!" He threatened.
"He's acting freakier than usual." Wanda said.
"Then just call me…" Arcade grinned insanely. "Freakazoid!"
&&&
"Call me surprised, but I don't think this is how I expected to see you Brock." Logan said gruffly as he shook his old friend's hand. "Running herd on a pair of teenagers?"
"You seem to have quite a herd yourself Logan." Brock returned as he took a drag on his cigarette. "So I hear you've got some Monarch troubles. I'd be glad to help out."
"Can we come too Brock?" Dean Venture asked.
"Yeah can we? We can make sure the kids don't get hurt." His brother Hank boasted, indicating the X-Men.
"Is he for real?" Jean asked.
"All right." Brock groaned. "You kids can come; just don't get in my way."
"So long as you don't get in ours." Amira growled.
"Go Team Venture!" Hank and Dean shouted.
The flight on the X-Jet was getting a bit cramped, with and the Ventures joining the X-Men…and boring them with completely improbable stories of utter crap.
"Mecha-shiva! Mecha-shiva! Mecha-shiva!" The Venture Brothers chanted as they retold one such story.
"Stop that! You're giving me a headache." Scott moaned.
"So you guys turned into a giant robot. Sure." Amira said skeptically. "Just like a bunch of hippies and their dog came and broke into your lab thinking you were ghosts."
"Seriously, only a total idiot would buy those stories!" Bobby said.
"And there's our expert opinion on the subject." Rogue rolled her eyes.
"So tell us, what's with that guy?" Hank asked, pointing at Logan. Amira grinned.
"Him?" Amira said. "That's Wolverine. Canada put him in their secret Weapon X program because of his healing abilities. He was the only one who could survive the process of having adamantium—an unbreakable metal—bonded to his skeleton. There were two side effects. One: He can mess up a guy with those claws of his. And Two: He became a humorless dick!"
"I heard that twinkle-toes!" Logan said, without looking back.
&&&
Back in the Flying Cocoon, Lina's heart leapt into her throat as the door to the Monarch's bedroom was opened. A woman with black hair and a purple out grumbled in a deep, masculine voice.
"Oh brother, I can't believe he trotted out that old Halloween costume." Dr. Girlfriend sighed. "What a shmuck!"
"Who are you?" Lina asked nervously.
"The Monarch's girlfriend." Lina gulped nervously as Dr. Girlfriend glared at her, looking over Lina's skimpy costume. Lina blushed.
"This wasn't my idea!" She moaned.
"Honey, if it were your idea to dress up like Princess Leia, you'd be going out with Number 21, not the Monarch." Dr. Girlfriend sighed. "I tell that idiot that I just have to go pick up some of my old stuff from the Phantom Limb's place and he thinks I'm cheating on him! Honestly, I don't know what's wrong with Mr. King Butterfly Man!"
"So…you're not mad at me?" Lina asked hopefully.
"Girl…" Dr. Girlfriend sighed. "What would be the point? I mean it's pretty obvious that you don't want to be here…"
"That's true." Lina nodded eagerly.
"…Or dressed like a slut." The Doctor continued. Lina flushed and looked down.
"Honestly it's crap like this that makes me wonder what I see in him. I mean, what kind of idiot would kidnap a girl in order to get her to like him?"
"Well…" Lina winced, that sounded too much like what Fred did to Jean way back when. "Maybe he's just lonely and feels desperate because other people don't see the real him."
"Honey, he dresses himself and his men up in butterfly suits and constantly attacks a 'sworn enemy' who barely gives a crap that he exists. What you see is pretty much what you get." Dr. Girlfriend snorted. "Still…I love the idiot. No matter what other people think."
"Yeah…" Lina said, thinking of Fred and how she sees him, instead of the way nearly everyone else does.
"I should make it clear that I love him, now and forever!" Dr. Girlfriend declared.
"Yeah!" Lina agreed.
"I'm going to go and tell him that right now!" The Doctor said as he turned around and marched out the door.
"Yea—wait! Wait, could you let me out of here first?" Lina asked as the door closed again. "Or at least give me some pants?"
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