A/N: I'm back! :) I had a great trip and was able to actually gather some inspiration back to finish this chapter...maybe I should take vacations more often. XD Anyway, today's Mother's Day, so Happy Mother's Day to all the mama's out there! (that includes Ursa) :D Please let me know your thoughts/suggestions you have for my story.
Song: "STAY IN MY MEMORY" by Bim.
Why?: The minute I first heard this song I got hooked. It has beautiful lyrics and a haunting yet pretty voice. Enjoy. :)
Chapter Nine: Heart Sacrifices
The people of the Southern Water Tribe wasted no time gathering their injured and dead. In the sudden surprise attack that had lasted only about fifteen minutes, the tribe had suffered a lot of damage. To both their fort and people. Everyone did what they could in suffering silence. It was a low blow to think they had finally found peace...and how quickly and unjustly it had been disrupted.
Hakoda, Bato, and a couple other leading men gathered inside Hakoda's igloo to discuss what had happened and what to do. In the quick count that had been made there were ten injured, four dead, and five missing. Among those missing was Sokka.
The chief was a wise and efficient leader, as he always had been, but he talked in a different tone now. A tone of deep sadness for his missing son, plus his scatter-hearted people.
Katara was with the men that were gathered, staring into the crackling fire pit with Gran-Gran. Both women were silent, since it wasn't there place to talk about tracking strategies, even though Katara might have helped since she saw where the ships were heading. But no one had asked her yet, and she didn't care to give out the information. She had her own plans as she was listening to those of her father's.
Bato was resting his chin on his hand, focusing his intent eyes on the snow-packed wall. "I just don't understand it...they came in Fire Nation ships but weren't Fire Nation..."
"How can you be sure? It must have been the Fire Nation for who else would attack us?!" A chestnut-haired man interrupted, making a disgusted expression whenever he mentioned the words Fire Nation.
"They were envious for they never got to dominate us during the war." The other man agreed, his features similar to the other's, making them seem related.
Hakoda shook his head, "I know Lord Zuko. He would never let any of his people send an attack toward us. This must be from the people of Lord Ozai's reign. Whoever is against us is against the new Fire Nation too."
Katara flinched when Zuko's name was mentioned but no one noticed except Gran-Gran who gave her a knowing look.
Bato straightened, "Regardless, what's important now is finding our missing people."
The chieftain nodded but Katara saw the hopelessness in him. She spoke before thinking,
"He's not dead."
Hakoda's eyes were filled with grief when he looked at his daughter, "Katara..."
"He's not dead dad!"
Katara stood, a fierce glare in her ice blue eyes. "I'm going to find him."
She fastened Sokka's sword, which she had held unto the entire time, with a ribbon around her waist belt. She felt the same reckless rush of determination she had had to find her mother's killer. She knew it was dangerous, and she didn't have Zuko around this time to help, but she couldn't give up on the little family she had left. Especially when he was most probably still out there...somewhere.
"Katara, I know what your thinking. But you can't just rush out after him."
Her eyes closed, "You don't understand..."
She was using the same line she had once used on Sokka, but her father wouldn't budge.
"Of course I do! Don't you think I want to do the same?!"
She yelled at him, "Then why don't you?!"
His voice rang, "Because I don't want to lose another child!"
There was a pain filled silence in the room. The other men avoided their eyes and Gran-Gran's were teary. Katara's throat felt dry.
"I'm sorry."
She whispered, and wiped away the leaving curtain.
When Aang got back to the hospital one of the healer's instantly informed him that Earth Master Toph was awake...and raging.
Aang didn't need to be told for he could hear the rocks being thrown from half a hallway away. He apologized to the healer though he was grinning from ear-to-ear; all he cared about was that Toph was ok. Now it was a matter of making sure no one else got injured on her account.
The Avatar raced to the room and ducked at the doorway in time to avoid a mini boulder that dented the wall. Aang frowned slightly when he thought about how much that would cost him.
Toph stopped her ongoing assault when she heard the familiar footsteps, "Twinkle Toes?"
Aang smiled again and stood by her bed, "Hey Toph! How are you feeling?"
Toph frowned deeply, anger and annoyance written all over her expression. The Avatar instantly regretted asking.
"Like smashing somebody all the way to Ba Sing Se. I keep telling these damn healers that I'm fine but they won't let me get up!"
Aang looked at his friend worryingly, remembering the fragile state he had found her in. "Toph, what happened? Back at...the Academy."
He thought she would start throwing rocks again, but instead Toph hunched her shoulders and spoke in a low sad voice, "I...don't remember. One minute I was there, the next I fall down and wake up here. I never even felt it coming."
This worried Aang even more but he kept his thoughts silent. Toph was one of the best masters he knew and if she hadn't even felt this attack coming then the Spirit's only knew...
"Where were you? I asked and they told me you had left and would come back soon. You took awhile."
The Air-bender glanced at the nearby window, not sure how long he had taken but it must have been long enough for Toph to realize something was up. He couldn't lie to her anyway, so he told her the truth...partially.
"I went to look for the others but couldn't find them. Iroh was walking by and we talked and I found out Zuko and Katara are in some kind of trouble. I'm going out to find them."
Aang had left out the whole Sun and Moon Destiny conversation along with the vague details of Ursa's reappearance, and Toph could sense it, but she didn't persist yet made a very determined nod.
"Good. Then I'm coming."
Aang's eyes widened, "You can't! Toph, you may feel fine but your pulse was very weak when I found you."
"Pht." Toph snorted, "You'll have to come up with a better excuse than that Twinkle Toes."
The Air-bending Master grimaced, "What about the Academy?"
"They can live without me for a couple weeks."
"What if it's more than a couple weeks?"
Toph gave him a look that ended that reason. Aang sighed and wanted to force her to stay but knew that would result with more boulders crashing and him most probably losing anyway.
He sat on a chair, resigned. Toph felt the mood change and slightly softened,
"I'll be careful. I mean...ya know I haven't totally lost my touch."
Aang couldn't help smiling ever so slightly, "No. Not at all."
Toph did her signature punch which, curiously, widened Aang's smile. "Watch it Twinkle Toes. So, when are we headin' out to save the Yin Yang couple's butts?"
The Avatar frowned again when he answered, "Right now. And let's hope we don't have to do any saving."
Toph lifted her eyebrows as she stood, "Are you kidding? Knowing those two their most probably getting into some sort of danger as we speak."
Zuko was just wandering. Aimlessly wandering until he could clear his mind and heart. Sure that the former would kick in sometime, while he wasn't so sure of the latter at all. Then again, when was he ever sure with matters of the heart?
So many things had changed. So many things were wrong. How had it come to this point? For his mother to strike him without reason, and how he was wandering through a lost trail with his love miles apart. As he thought and thought, another realization hit Zuko fast and hard.
He had abandoned his government, his Nation, on a whim to be with his mother. To believe his mother's lies. For what else were they if he didn't know the truth? Katara was right. He should have stopped and listened to reason instead of blindly diving into a mess of emotions. All his life he thought his father controlled him, but it was his mother who held the lock and key. Her absence in his life had scarred him more than the mark on his face. And now he was rightfully paying for his stupidity.
As the Fire Lord was walking he heard a rustle of leaves and stopped. Anyone would have thought it was the breeze's movements, but Zuko knew better. Or at least he should have since he had had plenty of experience "bumping" into strangers while strolling through some wooded area.
He tensed when he heard the sound closer and remembered he had no weapon since he had left his duel swords with Ursa.
Oh well. Zuko thought as he got into a bending stance.
A minute passed...then two...Zuko kept his pose despite the complaining ache from his still sore body. He decided jumping from a fifth-story building was not as easy it looked.
Just then a body swung from the trees and Zuko was face-to-face with...
"Ty Lee?"
Zuko was so stunned at first he didn't even blink. But soon realization sunk in and seeing a familiar face in all this chaos was such a relief that Zuko shocked them both further by embracing Ty Lee on the spot.
Ty's big eyes widened even more but she returned the hug and smiled when he awkwardly let go.
"Good to see you too Lord Zuko. But what are you doing here?"
Ty Lee's voice and expression understandable changed to one of worry and confusion. Zuko almost forgot his brief escapade was supposed to be a secret. Besides, the situation was too complicated to explain. Even he didn't understand it. So instead he said in a sterner voice,
"I was about to ask you the same. The Kyoshi Warriors aren't supposed to be stationed here are they?"
Ty Lee furrowed her brow but kept her tone in it's usual upbeat lightness,
"Oh, no, my Sisters are still stationed exactly where The Counsel told us. But the death threats and mobs for you have been going down and they could spare me so I came to visit some family and check out the woods while I was at it."
"Ah...well, that's nice."
The young Lord knew what Ty Lee was saying sounded perfectly reasonable while he...didn't. It was recently attained that Ty Lee had been Fire Nation bred, but Earth Kingdom born. Which explained her different eye color and features. So besides her regular sisters, she had some Earth Kingdom relatives.
Zuko wasn't sure what to say next, but just then Ursa appeared and Ty Lee's face was one of complete and utter shock before she remembered her manners and deeply bowed in front of the former Fire Lady. Ursa herself was a bit taken aback. Zuko frowned and introduced in a cold voice,
"Mother, you remember Ty Lee don't you?"
Ursa put her royal red lips in a very thin line, "Yes, of course. How are you Ty Lee?"
The circus entertainer rose her head and gazed with a sort of twinkle in her eyes, "I...I'm well Lady Ursa. How is your health?"
"Hm. Yes, well, fine I suppose." She looked at Zuko, "Perhaps we should settle down and have some tea darling?"
The former Prince narrowed his eyes but nodded, "As you say Mother dearest."
Ursa frowned with such grief in her heart as she watched her beloved son turn to gather firewood. All that grief was tucked away in a flash though, when she was left alone with her daughter's companion.
"Alright, enough of the act. What is your purpose here?"
Ty Lee blinked rapidly in confusion, "My Lady, what do you mean?"
For a face so delicate and sweet, Ursa could look quite intimidating when she so desired. "You know exactly what I mean. Speak of your intentions with my son now."
The so-called Circus Freak still looked puzzled until clarity slowly reached her eyes and she lowered her voice as she answered,
"I see...Lady Ursa, I understand your impression of me, but I'm not with your daughter anymore."
"My concern is not with Azula, at least not with what I'm talking about now. I know her fate, and to an extent, I know Mai's as well. But yours is shadowed from me and I must know it."
A filmy gaze suddenly appeared over Ty Lee's eyes and she spoke with a creepy grin, "Do you know your fate my Lady?"
Ursa's resolve slightly shook with fear but she swallowed it down.
"Yes. I do."
"Then you know what you must do."
The elder woman sighed, knowing she couldn't get more information from this girl. She turned her eyes to the afternoon sky and whispered,
"The night approaches. Go meet your master."
Ty Lee bowed and left. Ursa almost felt sorry for the girl. Unlike herself, she had not chosen her fate.
Zuko came back with the firewood and quickly analyzed the new scenario. "Ty had to go?"
Ursa sadly nodded. The royal Fire-bender made a careless shrug and dropped all the wood. As he knelt down he grumbled,
"Then it's just you and me again I guess."
Mothering eyes grew sadder still and she sighed while kneeling beside him. "It's time for us to talk."
Zuko snapped his golden stare at his mother, his heart pounding to know the truth but his injured pride was more persistent at being stubborn. He went back to putting sticks in a pile and whispered,
"It's not important."
Ursa's roughened fingertips lifted Zuko's chin up and she met his gaze levelly.
"It is important. I'm sorry. I am so, so, so, so sorry. For everything. For abandoning you, lying, hurting you..."
She lay a hand gently on her son's scarred cheek and caressed it. Her eyes dimming with emotion,
"I don't deserve to be forgiven. But if you could ever find it in your heart...perhaps my soul can rest in peace someday."
Zuko's eyes watered and his pride shut up and shut down. He held his mother's hand and nodded, his throat too filled with emotion to speak. Ursa shook her head and continued,
"You are apart of a great destiny, my son. You can lead such a rich, full life and spread that richness throughout your reign. But there are so many dangers for you as well. Others will always want to corrupt and destroy you...I know one of those destroyers. He was the one that kept me hidden all these years. He let me go only now...so I could capture you."
Zuko's eyes widened and he jumped back, more shock and pain written across his face. Ursa stayed on her knees, she looked up. Shame, fear, pain, sadness. All of that and more written across her face.
"I know what I must do and what will happen if I don't do it. But I can't. I won't. I know he will kill you to cut the bond and I rather burn than let that happen."
Now Zuko's head was spinning. Nothing was making sense in the world anymore. Not when the bit of real family he had left was telling him she was meant to betray him. Not when his heart, right along with his life, rose and fell so rapidly it left him breathless and unprepared. Zuko hated being unprepared. Now that he thought about it, he hated everything right now. Ursa could see that rage fueling and tried to calm it,
"You apart of the Sun and Moon Destiny. I knew so since the moment you were born but I tried to protect you. I could, but only for a little while and what I did in the long run has hurt you more. The man I work for and that is after you and your girlfriend is called The Shadow. I don't have time to reveal more for more of the same men that attacked us earlier are coming to this very location in a few minutes."
Zuko was stunned into silence. He supposed nothing should surprise him anymore but the next words of his mother almost threw him under when she said,
"You have to go without me now. You must go to your love and be together and protect each other. Tell her...tell Katara that I am sorry. And...I am proud of your choice Zuko. She is a beautiful and caring woman and you two will last. I can see it in you both."
Zuko didn't try to hide his shock, "But...I thought you hated her."
Ursa's eyes softened and a small smile almost reached her lips, "No. I respect her. I wanted to blame her for you falling into this destiny. But I see now it could not have been prevented, as much as I wanted, for your sake...and mine."
Zuko nodded and slowly went back down on his knees, in front of his mother's loving face. He would always remember that face, all the sacrifices and pain she willingly went through for him. All the trials he would never know. A mother's love was, indeed, priceless.
He gently laid a hand on hers. The same hand that used to fit inside hers was now bigger, yet still held that same little boy vulnerability now as he whispered low,
"I can't leave you."
Ursa's heart was breaking but she stayed strong for her son.
"You must and you will. My love, I have always told you to never forget who you are. But what is more important still is to never forget your mistakes and learn from them. Learn from the past, from my mistakes and others around you and grow. Don't let the past hold you down. Let go, run, and be free. Remember I will always love you. Always."
She bent his head and kissed the tenderest spot on his forehead. Zuko knew from experience this was goodbye for real and his throat felt too tight to speak once again. He also felt like he couldn't move either, so Ursa helped him up and looked at him sternly,
"Run Zuko. Run."
Zuko was about to shake his head when an arrow whizzed by it and Ursa shoved him away, taking another oncoming arrow to the shoulder. She pulled it out with a cry,
"RUN!"
Zuko didn't want to run but knew if he didn't they would both die. He thought of Katara and gathered the strength he needed to move his limbs.
He ran and looked back, tears spilling out of his golden eyes when he saw his mother fighting alone. Knowing this was one battler neither of them could win.
"I will always love you too."