Don't You Get It?
Chapter 4
SasuNaru
You don't understand. I never wanted to do this.
I can hear them talking. Their voices are whispers. Too quiet for me to understand what they are saying. I don't want to open my eyes. If I do they'll be disappointed. What if they ask me why I did this? What the hell am I supposed to say?
I forced my eyes open to the white ceiling. They lights are dull, yet still harsh on my eyes. I look around. No one is in the room with me. Those voices must have been outside the room or something. I pushed myself into a sitting position. I winced at the pain that shot through my stomach. I recalled the events that took place at Naruto's.
I'm afraid to look down. I'm not sure of what I'll see if I do. My wrists. What will they look like now? I cut pretty deep.
I slowly pushed my head down. I sighed in relief when I saw the bandages wrapped around them. I feel nervous. I want to jump out of the window and run away. I don't want to face my family. Itachi will just laugh, dad is going to not want to look at me and mom, she'll probably cry her eyes out. She'll ask me all these stupid questions that I wont want to answer.
I hear the footsteps outside the door. I expected to see my family walk through the door and cloud me with question. But no, it was just Itachi.
"Hey... you're up?" His voice was quiet and soft. Not like other times when he was being a jerk and calling me names. He smiled softly and walked to the bed. What the hell is his deal?
"Do you need anything?" He asked. I couldn't help but glare at him. It made me mad to see him acting so different. I shook my head no. I wanted to speak but the words but I couldn't get my voice box to work. "Okay." He sat in a chair next to the bed I was in. He didn't look at me and I didn't really look at him either. I really wanted to know what he was thinking. I wanted to talk to him. For some reason, I wanted him to beat me up and make fun of me like he always did. Whenever he did that I knew he loved me. That's how most brothers show love. But now what? I knew he wouldn't want to do anything to me.
"Where's mom and dad?" I asked. My voice was rough. It sounded like I hadn't talked in twenty years. Itachi looked at me. He looks tired. "Um... they left." What the hell is he talking about? "Where are they?"
"Don't you remember?" He said. His voice was still like a whisper. "They had to go on that trip with dad's boss. They're trying to get that deal with the printers. They left a few hours ago."
Well... Isn't that sweet. My parents leave after I try to kill myself. I don't care. It's better than them being here acting all different like Itachi.
"D-did you want to talk to anyone?" His voice shook as he leaned closer to the bed. "Like who?" I asked stupidly. "A therapist maybe." He avoided eye contact. He's making me feel like some hideous monster. I don't like this. Don't get me wrong, I understand that what I did is going to change things, but why do they have to change so fast? He has a right to not want to look at me. I'm sure the bruises on my face have gotten worse, I probably do look like a monster.
"Why can't I talk to you?" I wanted to smack myself after sounding so childish. He looked at me this time. I noticed his eyes moving around looking at my beat up face. "You can if you want. But you'll have to talk to the hospital therapist later. They need to ask yo questions." Aha! So instead of my mom, some stranger will be asking stupid questions.
I looked down at my hands folded on my lap. "What do you want to talk about?" I asked. I knew what he wanted to talk about. I'm not stupid. "How about we start off with what happened to you. Who the hell beat you up?" Itachi sounded a little angry. I couldn't tell if he was mad at me or the fact that I was beat up. "No one." I lied. I wasn't going to tell him Naruto did it. I didn't want to cause him any more trouble. "Sasuke!" Itachi raised his voice to a normal speaking tone. It sounded like yelling after whispering so much.
"Ok. I got into a fight with these kids on the way back home from Naruto's party."
"Do you know who they were?" He asked. He seemed to serious to be Itachi. "No. I never seen them around before." Itachi leaned back in his seat. He pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers and sighed. "So... Why did you... slit your wrists?"
How am I supposed to lie about this? I don't know what to say. Seriously, there is no easy way to answer a question like that. Especially when you don't want anyone to know the reason.
"I don't know." There. That should hold up for a while. "No. You do know. If you didn't have a reason you wouldn't have done this." He was getting mad. Maybe 'I don't know' wasn't a good idea. "Tell me why you did this!" He grabbed my hand and held it up forcing my to look at the whit cotton bandages. I pulled away quickly. "I said I don't know!" I screamed.
Everything was becoming annoying. The way he talked, all the questions, the fact that the whole fucking place was so fucking quiet. It's all so fucking annoying!
"Ok." Itachi stood up and glared at me. "You don't want to talk to me, you can talk to the therapist!" He walked back to the door. I don't want him to leave. "Itachi!" He stopped and turned around. "What?" I couldn't look at him.
"Don't hate me, ok?" He didn't say anything. He opened the door. "I'll pick you up tomorrow."
He was gone.
I didn't want to do this.