Chapter Four
"Yes, sweetie?" Ziva asked as she turned to her son and stroked his dark hair as her other hand wiped tears from her cheeks.
"Why are you crying?" he asked as he let his mother lead him back into the hotel room.
"Tony and I were talking about something sad." Ziva said as she pulled the covers back and Thomas crawled back into the bed.
"Why were you in the desert?" Thomas asked as his big, tired green eyes looked up at his mother.
"Remember how I told you I had a really bad summer? That it is a story I will tell you when you are older?" Ziva asked as she sat on the edge of his bed and kissed his forehead. Tony stood at the foot of the bed watching. "Much older."
"Uh huh." He yawned.
"The desert is part of it." Ziva said as she stroked his cheek. "Did you want to get in your pajamas, or are you comfortable in that?"
"I'm comfortable." He said with another yawn. "Can you read me a story?"
"You know who is really good at reading stories?" Ziva asked with a smile.
"Who?" Thomas asked excited.
"Tony." Ziva said as she motioned back to Tony, who had a stunned look on his face.
"Really?" Thomas asked as he looked to Tony who nodded and shifted his weight nervously. "Do you want to read me a story?" He asked shyly as he leaned into his mother.
"Yeah." Tony said with a gentle smile as he gave Ziva a silent thank you.
"I'll get my book." He said as he hurried out of the bed towards the suitcase.
"I am going to change." Ziva said as she went to her own suitcase and pulled her pajamas out then headed into the bathroom.
"Here you go." Thomas said as he handed the book to Tony and hopped back into bed, burying himself under the covers.
"Love You Forever." Tony read aloud as he ran a finger over the thin book. A baby boy on the front in a messy bathroom.
"It's my favorite." Thomas smiled as he looked at Tony expectantly.
"Where would you like me to sit?" Tony asked as he looked around the room. Ziva exited the bathroom in a pair of baggy pajama bottoms and his old Philadelphia PD t-shirt. Her make up was gone and her hair pulled back and he found it hard to catch his breath as he watched her get into her own bed.
"Right here, silly." Thomas said with an almost duh tone as he patted the spot next to him on the bed.
"Okay." Tony said as he glanced at Ziva and walked around the bed. He flipped on light that sat on the nightstand and went to sit on the bed.
"Take your shoes off." Thomas ordered before Tony could sit down.
"Okay." Tony laughed as he kicked off his sneakers and sat next to Thomas on the bed. "Ready?"
"Uh huh." Thomas said as he lifted Tony's arm so he could cuddle into his side as he read.
"Okay." Tony said as his breath caught in his throat and he fought the urge to pull Thomas closer.
Ziva smiled as she watched her son cuddle with his father. She fought the urge to cry as Tony started reading and Thomas rested his head on Tony's chest with a yawn and draped his arm around Tony's stomach. Instinctively Tony wrapped his arm around Thomas instead of having it lay on the pillow behind him.
Soon the soft sound of Tony's voice lulled both Thomas and Ziva to sleep. He was determined to finish the book though, having never read it before. He finished and didn't bother trying to hide the hitch in his voice or the tears in his eyes since his audience was asleep.
"I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always, as long as I'm living my baby you'll be." Tony promised in a whisper against Thomas' hair as he pulled the little boy closer to him. Thomas stirred and Tony was terrified he would wake up scared and confused but he threw his leg over Tony's, nearly kneeing him in his groin as he sighed and settled back into a deep sleep. Tony knew he should go home but he was too comfortable and content he wasn't even considering moving from his son's embrace.
He was too terrified he'd never have a moment like this again.
"Tony?" A little voice whispered a couple hours later. "Tony."
"Yes, Thomas?" Tony groaned as he opened his eyes, the light from the lamp he left on making it tough to keep them open. "Are you okay?"
"Yes." He said as his green eyes searched Tony's. He was obviously debating whether or not to voice what he was thinking.
"You sure?" Tony asked and Thomas nodded.
"Did you know my daddy?" Thomas asked in a whisper. He was obviously nervous as he broke eye contact with Tony and toyed with Tony's shirt.
"Do you know who your daddy is?" Tony asked as he tilted his head in an effort to have the little boy look at him again. He was pretty certain Thomas didn't who his father was, or was highly confused on who he was.
"Yeah." Thomas said as he pulled away from Tony and left the bed. Glancing to make sure his mother was asleep as he searched his suitcase and pulled a photo from his shoe. He returned to the bed and showed the photo to Tony. "Him."
"McGee?" Tony yelped as he gave Thomas a horrified look, then looked to see if Ziva had woke. "Who told you that Timothy McGee was your father?"
"I guessed." Thomas shrugged as he looked to Tony still waiting for his answer. His eyes filled with tears as he realized he was wrong. "I'm not right am I?"
"No, Thomas, you're not." Tony said as he reached up and wiped a tear from Thomas' cheek.
"But you know him?" Thomas asked as he looked back at the picture in his hands.
"Yeah, I know him." Tony said as he glanced to Ziva real quick finding that she was awake and watching them. She nodded and Tony looked back to Thomas who was still staring at the photo.
"Is he in this picture?" Thomas asked hopefully as he looked up at Tony, his eyes still watery.
"Yeah." Tony smiled. The picture contained several men: McGee, Gibbs, Ducky, Palmer, Dwayne, Tobias, and himself. "Right there." Tony said as he pointed to himself. He was standing in between Ziva and Abby and was curious as to how Thomas made the jump to McGee.
"But that's you." Thomas said as he continued to stare at Tony in the picture.
"Yeah." Tony smiled as he withdrew his hand and waited for a reaction from Thomas.
"You're my daddy?" Thomas chocked out as he looked up at Tony confused, hurt, yet hopeful. Tony nodded yes not trusting his voice. "Where were you?"
"Thomas." Ziva said startling both Tony and Thomas. "Come here."
"What?" Thomas asked softly as he moved from the bed to stand next to Ziva's bed.
"I love you. You know that right?" Ziva asked as she cupped her son's cheek.
"Yeah." Thomas nodded obviously confused. "I love you too."
"I know, sweetie." Ziva said as she fought her tears. "But there is something you should know."
"Ziva." Tony tried to interrupt but she sent a glare his way that shut him up.
"Tony is your father, yes." Ziva started as she stroked the little boys hair. "But he did not know that he was your father either until we saw him in the park."
"You didn't tell him?" Thomas asked as he dropped his mother's gaze and stared at the sheets.
"No, Thomas, I did not. I didn't know I was pregnant with you until I had already moved away from D.C. to Annapolis." Ziva tried to explain as she let the tears fall from her eyes.
"Why didn't you tell him?" Thomas asked confused as he pulled at the sheets. "Were you gonna be mad?" Thomas asked as he looked back to Tony.
"No." Ziva said drawing Thomas' attention back to her. "I did not tell him because I didn't want to share you with him." Ziva said trying to keep it as basic as possible.
"That's not fair." Thomas cried as he looked up at Ziva.
"I know, love, and I am so sorry." Ziva cried along with her son as she scooted closer to the edge of the bed and hugged him tight against her as they cried.
"Am I allowed to know him now?" Thomas pleaded as he pulled back from the hug and looked at Ziva.
"If you want to." Ziva said as she looked to Tony, who she was pretty sure hadn't blinked or breathed through the entire conversation.
"Okay." Thomas said as he crawled back into the bed next to Tony. "Do you want to know me?"
"Yeah, I really do." Tony said as he wiped another tear from Thomas' cheek. "If you want me to."
"I do." Thomas said as he got back under the covers. "Are you gonna get under the covers?"
"Sure." Tony said as he settled himself next to Thomas.
"I love you, Daddy." Thomas whispered into Tony's chest and he cuddled against him.
"I love you too, Thomas Zane." Tony smiled into his son's hair as he let a tear escape. He looked to Ziva who was still crying, but this time it seemed like happy tears.