Chapter 18: Getting It On For The Good Of All Mankind

Dean was awake, waiting for Eli with crossed arms when she crept back into the house later that night. He flicked on a light as she entered the kitchen and she squealed, spinning around with her hand clutching her chest.

"Damnit, Dean, you nearly gave me a heart-attack!" she hissed. He stared at her thunderously. "What's the matter with you?"

"Let's go for a walk," he said, jerking his head to the side door. Eli raised her eyebrows.

"Okayyyy." She followed him out the door and into the moonlit night, jogging lightly to keep up with his long strides. He walked until they were a sufficient distance from the house, surrounded by mountains of old cars, close to the place where Dean swore to Castiel only hours before. Then he slammed on his heel and spun around, facing her with a furious look in his eyes.

"Dean, what's going on?" she asked nervously, backing up. He advanced on her.

"Where were you tonight?" he asked, his voice deathly calm.

Eli felt something hard and sick lodge itself in the pit of her stomach. Oh shit. "I was just… running some… errands," she stuttered. "Personal things."

"Oh, it was personal things, all right," he hissed.

"What are you talking about?" she asked, her heart fluttering wildly in her chest.

Dean came so close to her that she could smell the leather of his jacket, then yelled in her face: "I followed you!"

Her cheeks went deathly white. "Oh my God, Dean, I can explain…" she gasped.

"Can you?" he thundered. "Really? 'Cause Sam might have lied to me about the demon blood, but that's because it's an addiction. He at least told me about sleeping with the demon bitch! But you! Sneaking around behind our backs and putting our lives in danger…"

"Dean," she pleaded, backing up frantically.

"What I've seen cannot be unseen!" he yelled crazily. "Damnit Eli, it can't be unseen!"

"I'm sorry!" she cried. "Dean, really I am! It was stupid, is stupid, I know, believe me I know."

"I just fucking sold my soul to those bastards and you're screwing one of them? You could bring the wrath of Heaven down on our fucking heads!"

"I KNOW!"

His voice was suddenly calmer, almost sad, his eyes old. In the starlight he looked washed-out and grey, a ghost of himself, like he could flicker and vanish at any moment. "Then why did you do it?"

Eli gazed at him wearily. "Because…oh hell, Dean." She sank down onto an old tire and stared into space, her face hollow and wan, shoulders slumped. "I don't know. A lot of reasons. The apocalypse is coming, and there's a snowball's chance we can stop it. Most likely we'll die trying. All of us: humans, angels, everyone involved in this war probably won't come out the other side. You know this better than anyone. And I just…I just wanted to be happy, just for a little while, before the lights went out." She sounded close to tears. "I know it's wrong and I'm sorry, I really am, but I'm not regretful, Dean. Sometimes we need something to keep us going. You've got Sam, and you're so lucky to have him. I just…needed this. I needed it. And I didn't want to die without…" She trailed off, choking on her words. After a moment, Dean realized she was crying.

"Aw, fuck," he muttered. "Don't think I'm gonna go easy on you because you start bawling." Eli sniffled, taking a shaking breath to steady her nerves, and stood, brushing dirt off of her jeans. She smiled weakly at him, the tracks of her tears glowing silver in the moonlight.

"I know. You want to take a swing at me?"

He was taken aback. "What?"

"A swing. I know you want to. You don't have to feel bad about hitting a girl. I can take it. Come on. I deserve it." She squared her shoulders as if really expecting him to throw a punch.

"Eli, I'm not going to hit you," he said flatly. Her shoulders dropped.

"Oh. What do you want, then?"

"Preferably some brain bleach," he snarked. "But since that's not gonna happen, I'll settle for you not lying and sneaking around behind my back. I've already been through this with Sam, I can't go through it again with you."

Eli stared at him for a long moment, then nodded. "That's reasonable. No secrets."

He sighed and shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket, staring pensively around the junkyard. The moon bathed everything in an eerie glow, as if the husks of old cars were skeletons, watching him. Beneath his feet the wind swirled up little clouds of dust that whipped at his ankles. "So I take it the other angels don't know about you boning one of their own, huh?"

"Classy, Dean," Eli said, visibly calmed by the fact that he was speaking civilly again. "And no, of course not. If they found out, there would be—"

"Hell to pay," Dean finished for her. She nodded.

"Literally."

He met her eyes. "You're screwing with a lot of lives here, Eli."

She stared back unflinchingly. "I know."

His mouth twisted a little, but in the darkness Eli wasn't sure if it was a grin or a grimace. "But seriously, Cas?"

"He's a good man," she said evenly, and he shot her a look.

"He's not a man, Eli. He never was. Never will be."

She stared at him coolly until he gave up and turned his head away, the moon casting shadows on his handsome face. "Don't worry, your creepy secret is safe with me," he said in a resigned voice. "Let's just hope those fuckers don't find out before the big showdown."

"Yeah," Eli said as they headed back to the house, two small figures walking through a maze of cars in the moonlight night. "Because I don't think our lives can afford to suck any more than they already do."

"Amen to that."

It happened the next afternoon, after they were forced to chain Sam to a cot in the panic room. There was nothing to do but wait. Bobby was out looking for leads. Eli and Dean were side-by-side on the couch, heads nearly touching, feet propped up on the battered coffee table, trying to ignore Sam's shrill cries by drinking beer and playing a game of "anywhere but here."

"I would be in the Florida Keys," Dean said dreamily, his head tilted back. He slowly put the bottle to his lips and took a deep drink. "A busty, loose-moraled woman on each arm, eating a steak dinner. With French fries. And cheesecake. And sex."

"Nice," Eli said, shimmying deeper into the couch. "I agree with the beach idea. If I could be anywhere, I would be in Bali right now, toes in the sand, sipping a heavily-tequila spiked drink with a little umbrella in it." She sighed. "I've always wanted to go to Bali. Wish I was there right now."

She fell suddenly silent. Dean rolled his head to look at her and nearly spit out his beer, jumping from the couch in confusion.

Eli was gone.

"Eli? Eli!" he yelled, circling the couch. "Come on, this isn't funny!" He ducked his head into the kitchen, but it was empty. He reentered the den and paced, checking the corners like she would be hiding among the guns and dust bunnies. "Where the hell are you?"

"Here," gasped a voice from the other side of the room. Eli was standing there, looking so shocked it was almost comical. Her hair was frizzing as if from heat, and sand clung to her socked feet.

"What the hell?" he snapped. "What happened? Where were you?"

Eli licked her lips nervously, twisting her hands together in front of her. "I, ah…I think I was in Bali."

Dean shook his head as if to clear water out of his ears. "What? But you can't teleport, that's not something you can do, right?" He stared at her, hard. "Right?"

"I can't! I don't know what happened. One minute I was on the couch thinking about how much I would like to see Bali, and then…I was there. I don't know how. Then I thought about here and I was back. I mean, I can't teleport. Not like the angels can. That's crazy, right?"

"I don't know," Dean said, running his hands through his hair. "Uh, think of someplace now."

"Where?" she demanded.

"I don't know! The kitchen. We need more beer any—"

Eli vanished, then ran out of the kitchen excitedly.

"I can teleport!" she yelled triumphantly, throwing her hands above her head and waving them around like a muppet. She was running too fast for socks and slid into him, grabbing his arm for support, beaming. "This is awesome!"

Dean was more sober about it. "Yeah, but the question is, how?" he asked suspiciously. "I mean, new powers don't just pop up out of nowhere."

"I might have an answer for that," a gruff and somewhat sheepish voice said from behind them. They whirled around to see Castiel standing in the doorway.

"Well, if it isn't the perfect obedient angel," Dean snapped. Castiel just shifted on his feet, looking discomfited by Dean's display of anger. Eli sighed.

"He knows, Cas."

Castiel's blue eyes shot up with something close to fear in them. Dean shook his head.

"Oh, I know, all right. I wish to God I didn't, though."

"You understand that this information can never be revealed," Castiel rasped, suddenly looking fiercer and more dangerous, like the warrior he was. He crossed the room and came very close to Dean's face with an intimidating scowl. "If it were to become known it would ruin the lives of everyone in this room, at the very least."

"Jeez, yeah, of course. Not a word," Dean said, holding up his hands. Castiel retreated a little, looking satisfied. Dean couldn't resist getting the last word in. "But don't you think you guys should have thought of that before you went and did anything?"

"Drop it, Dean," Eli growled.

"Fine, whatever, bone or don't bone, I don't care," he snapped. "Just tell us what the hell is going on with Eli's mojo."

Castiel tilted his head. "I believe it may be a …side effect," he said slowly.

"Of what?" Dean and Eli asked simultaneously. Castiel glanced around the room, not meeting anyone's eyes and looking uncommonly uncomfortable.

"Well, it's just a theory, but…" He trailed off, then started again, his rough voice coming out jerky and stilted. "Sam derives his power from demonic sources, so he increases his abilities by imbibing the blood of demons. Elijah…derives her power from her angelic father. It is my theory that a Nephilim who maintains a certain level of… closeness with an angel might find their powers temporarily…enhanced." By the end of his speech he was nearly stuttering, his hands awkwardly balled in the pockets of his trench coat.

There was a moment of silence in which Eli's face turned brilliant red and she studied her dirty socks like they were the most fascinating things in the universe.

"I don't get it," Dean finally said, and both of their heads jerked up to look at him in surprise. "I mean, Eli's been close to angels for months, why is she suddenly showing effects now?"

They stared at him, hard. He looked between them. Eli raised her eyebrows pointedly.

"Oh. Oh! Close. Close-close. Okay. Got it," he stammered, embarrassed. Eli felt like slapping herself on the forehead. "Oh, shit. So you guys are like… getting it on for the good of all mankind?"

"Dean," Eli groaned, burying her face in her hands. Castiel's mouth thinned.

"This effect was … unintended," he said, glowering at Dean. "But it could end up being beneficial in your fight against Lilith, provided no one realizes the origin of her new abilities."

"How?" Dean asked, but at that moment the door opened and Bobby entered.

"What are you two standing around like idiots for?" he barked. Eli and Dean shared a look before turning back to Castiel, but the angel was gone.

That night, Sam escaped.

He stole two different cars and drove all night, calling Ruby desperately. Finally he found a hotel and holed up in it, waiting for her to arrive.

She knocked on the door a few hours later, a smirk on her pretty face as Sam opened it. "Honeymoon suite, really? I'm flattered," she said as she swept inside.

Sam closed the door and bolted it, his fingers trembling so badly he could barely slide the chain into place. "Did you bust me out of that room?"

"How could I, Sam?" Ruby scoffed. She perched on the edge of the bed and crossed her long legs daintily. "The whole thing's engineered to bite me in the ass."

Sam was shaking and sweating at the same time, sweat rolling furiously into his eyes. He blinked rapidly, feeling the sting of salt and dirt. He didn't even know how he was still standing straight. "Then how did I get out of there?"

Ruby shrugged, looking supremely uninterested. "I don't know. I don't wanna know. You're out. That's all that matters." She smiled at him seductively. "I'm glad you're here."

"Yeah?" Sam asked aggressively. His stomach rolled and the room pitched. His tongue felt thick in his mouth. "Where have you been?"

"I got here as quick as I could," Ruby snapped.

"I mean the past three weeks. I've been calling." Sam's voice was rising into a deadly whine.

"I've been pretty deep in it trying to dig out Lilith," Ruby said with an irritated flounce, tossing her shiny black hair behind one shoulder. "Sometimes I can't sit around and check my voicemail. I'm sorry you're hurting. Really. I had no idea that Dean would do that to you."

Sam sighed. He knew that he shouldn't trust Ruby but she had done so much for him, saved his life on so many occasions, and right now she was the only one who seemed to understand him, who was even willing to talk to him. He felt a new respect for her rise up as she spoke sympathetically about his fight with Dean. Demon or no, she was on the right side, his side. He knew it with every fiber of his being.

Still, he couldn't hold out forever. He pushed her so that her back was pressed into the mattress, sliding down her body in search of the knife he knew she would have on her. It was tucked into her boot, all sharp and silver and beautiful. He was just about to slice open a vein and drink when she stopped him, putting a hand on his shoulder and pushing him back.

"Sammy?" she asked innocently. "Before we do this, I have to know. Did you remember to bring me what I asked for?"

Sighing in pain and irritation, Sam got off the bed and rummaged around in the duffel bag he had thrown on the floor. "Yes, finally. I've been trying to get a hold of it for months now. I thought it was in one of Dad's safe houses, but it turns out it was in a secret safe of Bobby's. Nicked it as I escaped." He held up the object, a slim, unbroken circle of silver. It glinted eerily in the light. "What is it, anyway?"

"Oh, nothing," Ruby purred, pulling him back to the bed. He slid the knife along her arm, bringing up a deep well of blood, and leaned down to suck deeply at it. "Just a collar," she said, stroking his hair as he drank. "Just a very special collar for a very special person."

Sam wasn't even listening anymore.

Eli sat in Bobby's house, scanning the weather reports online. "Here!" she called. Bobby held out the phone so she could yell into it. "Massive lightening storms, hail, you name it. All happening in a town called Cold Springs."

"You got that, Dean?" Bobby asked, placing the phone next to his ear. He listened for a moment, nodding. "Listen, Dean. Us finding Sam? It's gotta be about getting him back, not pushing him away." He paused again, then said in as empathetic a tone as Eli had ever heard him use: "I know you're mad, Dean. I understand. You got a right to be, but I'm just saying. Be good to him anyway. You gotta get through to him."

He stopped, waited, and then sighed, looking at Eli. "He hung up."

"He'll be okay, Bobby," Eli said, pushing the chair away from the computer. "He always is."

"You just tell yourself that," Bobby said. She looked at him, confused, brushing messy hair out of her eyes. "I know how this is worrying you, Eli. You shouldn't have to try and stay strong for me."

"Bobby," Eli started, then looked down, fiddling with the cords of her ratty sweatshirt, remembering how distraught Dean had been after Sam escaped, how he didn't even seem like the same person. He had screamed at her before he left, his eyes wild and hysterical. Just stay out of this! We're not your family! Deal with your own problems and leave my brother to me! "I just wish I could be there with him now," she said finally. "I wish he would stop cutting me out. I could help, I know I could."

"I know that," Bobby said gently. "But this is more than the apocalypse. This is about two brothers. And some things Dean just has to do on his own. He'll get Sam back."

He didn't get Sam back.

Eli had finally fallen into a troubled sleep on one of Bobby's spare beds when she heard raised voices coming from downstairs.

"You stupid, stupid son of a bitch!" Bobby's harsh drawl was unmistakable, though it was angrier than she had heard it in a long time. Quietly she got up and edged down the stairs. "Well, boo hoo, I am so sorry your feelings are hurt, princess! Are you under the impression that family's supposed to make you feel good? Make you an apple pie, maybe? They're supposed to make you miserable! That's why they're family!"

Now she could see them. Dean was standing by a window, staring out of it with such concentration that it looked like he was holding back tears.

"I told him, 'you walk out that door, don't come back' and he walked out anyway!" Dean insisted gruffly. "That was his choice!"

"He's sick, Dean," Eli said from her place on the stairs, and both men whipped around to look at her. "And deluded. And you pushed him away?"

"You don't know what you're talking about!" Dean snapped. "No matter what's going on, he's still Sam, and he made his choice."

"You sound like a whiny brat," Bobby said fiercely, then paused. "No, you sound like your dad. Well, let me tell you something. Your dad was a coward."

Dean went deathly still. "My dad was a lot of things, Bobby, but a coward?"

"He'd rather push Sam away than reach out to him. That don't strike me as brave. You are a better man than your daddy ever was. So you do both of us a favor. Don't be him."

His rant finished, Bobby turned and stomped away. Eli approached Dean with trepidation.

"Dean," she whispered, reaching out a hand. He turned to look at her, unmistakable tears in his eyes.

"Eli," he croaked desperately. "I think I've made a terrible—"

And then he was gone.