Author's Notes: I had already written this before seeing the Rei-lovers react to the last chapter, so I'm glad I made this one Rei-centric. Actually the whole story is quite a bit more Rei-centric than the other one, which is what I wanted. Anyway, enjoy (hopefully).
Gunman – this chapter is kind of an interlude until the battle you're looking for takes place, and then after that, the meeting with Asuka in the chapter after that ;-p I'm definitely not rushing this one, when Asuka makes her appearance, things really start heating up, so enjoy the peace while it while it lasts ;-)
kknd – somewhat right, somewhat wrong, but all your questions and observations are good ones. All I'll say is you'll find out before too long ;-p you definitely have a unique way with words
Chapter 3 – Sempai
Preread by Fanf1cFan
Except for the never-ending contest between the air-conditioning unit and the cicadas, Rei's apartment was silent. It's two occupants sat in folding chairs eating breakfast from a card-table, she on one side and he on the other, the both of them dressed in their school uniforms. Her arm was still in a sling, and a bandage encircled her head, protecting her still-tender right eye, but she had recovered enough to be able to get up and move around.
She contemplated the plate before her, and the two slices of toast artfully arranged thereon. It was no different from her normal breakfast except for one small detail. "Cinnamon toast," he had said, responding to her questioning gaze. "You've never had it?" "No," she had replied. "It's good," he had said, then he had fallen silent. It was good, she decided, and the three weeks since she had started eating it had not changed her mind.
She watched as the butter melted into the crisped bread, blurring the pseudo-random swirls of cinnamon until they were nearly the same color as the background of the toast. Her life before Third Impact had been as dull as the plain bread she had every day for breakfast. What was the point of anything else? Her sole purpose in life had been the Evangelion, and that only so that she would eventually be granted the oblivion she had so long desired. Things like a clean living environment, variety in choice of food, and friendship meant little when your main priority was to be allowed to die. What was the point of trying to make a friend, only to hurt them and yourself when your purpose was fulfilled? Why risk rejection when Instrumentality would make it all meaningless? This had been her mind-set before Third Impact.
Picking up half her breakfast, she bit into it, pondering the subtle sweetness the spice gave the bread as she methodically chewed. Much like the swirls of cinnamon that laced her toast, Shinji had woven his way into her routine. Quiet and withdrawn though he was, the kitchen was his domain, and mealtimes were no longer three pointless speed-bumps along the dull monotony of the day. It was not that she disliked cooking, it just hadn't seemed worth the bother. She was well aware of her nutritional requirements, and had a set weekly schedule of what to eat to ensure a nominally healthy diet with a minimal amount of effort. It was with some trepidation that she had shown him her eating schedule, and explained the reasoning behind it. He had simply smiled a little, nodded, and reached out his open hand expectantly for her NERV expense card. Although she had shown no external hesitation or anxiety as she put the piece of plastic into his hand, she had wondered just what would become of her perfectly organized life.
As she ate her toast, she still wondered, but she no longer worried. At least not about her meals. A sharp burst of sweetness startled her taste-buds. A raisin, she decided. Two of them, she amended chewing carefully as the intensity of the flavor slowly died away. If the toast represented her life, then the raisins were the physical points of contact she now had. Touch. The warmth of his body next to hers in the night. The feel of his heart-beat underneath her hand. These memories brought with them a feeling of melancholy, for she knew he did not feel the same need for touch that she did. Although he no longer outwardly manifested signs of fear, she could still sense his slight discomfort whenever they were close. Were it not for the problem of their shared nightmares, he would undoubtedly prefer to sleep separated.
And then there was the kiss. Though she no longer blushed when she thought about it, three weeks had in no way dulled the memory. There had been no further chances for a repeat of that incident. Or rather, neither he nor I have made any chances. He would not, of course. She had seen the panic in his eyes when they both had awoken from that rather intense dream, and it was only because of curiosity brought about by the dream itself that she had decided in the moment to kiss him. She closed her eyes, letting the recalled event wash over her. The soft warm feeling of movement against the sensitive areas of the mouth. The speeding up of the heartbeat, and feeling his answering life-pulse through their shared chest contact. What resistance she felt from him had melted away as the kiss continued, but she had finally relented. The only thing left on his face had been embarrassment, which had relieved her. But why embarrassment over something so tender and pleasurable?
"Help me," he had said as they both lay on the beach in that strange reality. How was she to do that? Between the two choices of talk and action, she had initially chosen action. Since it was closeness he feared, she had begun putting her hand over his chest and snuggling herself up to him before he went to sleep, as opposed to waiting until he was already unconscious. Except for an initial flinch the first couple of times, he had shown no resistance, but then again he rarely showed overt resistance to anything.
"Is something wrong?" She opened her eyes at his words. Her plate was empty, as was his.
"It is nothing," she answered, putting to use one of the phrases he so often used himself. No, she decided, questions would only ruin the bond she already had with her fellow pilot, and she would do nothing to jeopardize their shared touch each night. She slid back her chair and stood.
"Ah..." His vague utterance caused her to pause momentarily. He was smiling a little, so she assumed it was a laugh. He happened to catch her glance, and looked down momentarily before continuing. "Misato once told me that whenever I said 'nothing,' I was looking for attention."
"You asked if something was wrong," she said, correcting his misunderstanding. "Nothing is wrong." Things are going right, and I don't want to ruin it.
"Alright, alright, sorry I doubted your motives." Oddly enough, his smile twitched a little, becoming larger. She replayed her words, trying to discern the humor in them, and failing. Perhaps it was simply the way in which she spoke. She never engaged anyone other than Shinji and the Commander in any kind of extended conversation, so she had no other experiences with which to gauge the validity of such a guess.
"I accept your apology," she said demurely, turning to leave the small kitchen area and go back into the main living room. Behind her she heard him clear his throat in what sounded suspiciously like a choked laugh. Such occurrences had been happening every so often when they spoke, but despite her attempts, she could not puzzle out what it was about her speech that was funny. She had attempted to make a joke once, and it had fallen so far flat as to strengthen her resolve never to try again in her lifetime.
Checking the small clock on her rolling bedside table to make sure she was still within schedule, she began to stretch carefully, keeping constant awareness of her still-healing injuries. She was about halfway through her normal routine which she had resumed six days prior, when the soft clatter of dish-washing ceased. He was slightly behind his usual schedule by her estimation, but it did not matter since he usually spent the remainder of his morning time listening to his portable music player. She had inquired once out of curiosity as to what music he played, and was not terribly surprised to find that it was mostly classical, which seemed to fit his personality.
As she began on the more difficult and painful stretches, she reflected on her room-mate's most recent behavior. The past week he had begun to deviate from his norm, expressing a more intent interest in her daily routine. She was almost certain he was trying to establish a more intimate rapport with her, but as with all matters of the heart, it was difficult to be sure. Her thoughts on the matter were conflicted. While a closer relationship was more appealing in that the possibility of shared touch was increased, it was also far more dangerous. A closer relationship would only accentuate how little she knew of the subject, and increased the likelihood of a mistake that could cost her everything.
Something prickled the back of her neck, and she noticed out of the corner of her eye that Shinji was standing in the doorway between the two rooms. The kitchen was undoubtedly warm, and he had just finished washing dishes in hot water, but his face was a little too flushed even given those circumstances. She considered and immediately discarded the possibility that his reaction was to her physical appearance. In her own eyes her physical attributes were utterly average, with the exception of her hair and eyes. Other than assuring it was properly washed and free of tangles, she gave no special attention to her hair, but she had directly observed the attention her eyes had drawn when she had first begun attending school. It did not take long at all for the other girls to start belittling her. It did not occur to her that they were jealous of her most striking feature. She only knew that her red eyes drew unwanted negative attention and rude stares.
Shinji cleared his throat nervously. "-ah, is that physical therapy assigned by Ritsuko?" Though his tone was covered by the more overt worry that she might injure herself, she detected a hint of the interest he had begun to show in her daily life.
"No," she answered, deciding that if she offered an explanation on her own, it would save them both the time it would take for him to decide he wanted to inquire further. "Stretches to aid in the practice of gymnastics." She saw his eyes widen slightly.
"Wow. I didn't know you did gymnastics. But isn't it too early to be starting back on something like that?"
"It is," she responded. "I am merely doing the stretches." Almost she let her attention drift away, but when he paused, wavering for a moment, she knew he was not yet through. He appeared to be having some kind of furious internal argument, before eventually pushing through and speaking.
"I wonder if that kind of thing would help. Me, I mean," he hastily amended. "Or do you think it's too late to start?" Wheels seemed to be turning in his head, pushing him past his initial hesitancy. "I wonder if I can use this thing we're in to make up for lost time..."
His question was not completely unexpected. Though they had not yet talked in depth about their separate experiences, she had given the matter serious thought. The real question, she knew, was not whether or not it would be good for him to train, but whether or not it would be good for them to do so together. She knew the request was coming, and had considered its ramifications. A blunt rejection would harm what she was trying to preserve, while going along with his potential request would bring them closer to a possible misunderstanding and separation.
"My personal experience is that all physical changes are erased each time we return to the beginning. With the exception of the brain, and possibly the nerve impulses, everything is returned to the state it was in at that moment in time." He nodded slowly. "Such training would likely prove fruitless." She saw his face fall at her subtle decline of his unspoken request. "I will be returning to school today," she continued, hoping to take his mind off the unpleasant topic.
"Oh?" an interrogative expression erased the former sadness. "Are you sure you're up for it?" The care in his tone was obvious, so she overlooked the likely-unintentional insult of her self-observation skills.
"Yes. I have already been through similar circumstances once before," she reminded him.
"Okay," he responded, turning to go back to the kitchen. "I'll pack your lunch with mine, then."
"Thank you," she murmured.
The morning sun crawled up the sky as the two pilots made their way along the undulations of the sidewalk towards school. So she doesn't want me to practice gymnastics with her. He had been around his fellow pilot long enough during the past month and in the months of his previous life to know that she had turned him down even though he had not managed to properly ask. Then why are we walking to school together? He filed the question with all the other why's he was collecting about the enigmatic girl he slept with.
Slept with. Even a month had not managed to dull that novel experience. Truthfully, he was rather glad to be in a position where Rei needed him, where she relied on him for meals and anything else that required the ability to move around. It meant he was safe from abandonment, or at least he had been safe. She had almost completely recovered. Perhaps that was what had pushed him out of his comfort zone and enabled him to consider trying to get closer to her. Or it might have been at night when she had started moving close to him immediately, instead of waiting until he went to sleep.
He had yet to decide if he was in heaven or hell. Unlike the kiss, which he could pass off as her being curious, she really seemed to want the physical contact they shared at night. It was strange, because he had never known Rei to want anything apart from her work with Eva.
"An Angel should attack today." Her calm tone belied the subject matter.
Ah, so that's why we're walking together. She simply wanted to discuss the Angel attack. Even though he had expected something like this, it was still kind of a let-down. Even if she does care, in the end she's using me, just like Misato. I'm just part of her work.
"Will it attack?" he wondered idly.
"By all previous indications, you will have to fight it at least once," she replied. "Whether it will mimic the previous Angel and decide not to attack after that, I do not know."
"I've got a lot more experience than when I last faced this one," he reasoned. "I shouldn't have any problems."
She nodded, contemplating what she was about to suggest. "We should leave school and be at headquarters before it attacks."
"That's a good idea," he admitted.
It is as long as the Angel keeps to schedule, she thought, but did not say. It was difficult enough putting forth a plan that had them risking suspicion, or even discovery.
Silence gave way to subdued chatter as they approached the main subdivisions and entered the sparse flow of other students heading in the same direction. He could practically feel the stares that he, or rather he and his blue-haired companion, were attracting. He wondered idly if Rei would notice, and decide she would rather walk alone. Part of him almost hoped she would do that, since he would then no longer be in the spotlight, but in truth it felt good to walk beside her to school.
I wonder what Kensuke or Touji would think if they saw this. He could imagine Kensuke's camera somewhere nearby filming every expression on Rei's face, and him beside her. He knew the class otaku would not hesitate to sell him down the river over something this new and intriguing. He smiled a little. Kensuke wouldn't hesitate to sell him out even if he remembered the six months they had spent as friends. At the moment, they were barely acquaintances.
Wait. Kensuke and Touji... His smile disappeared as he considered their role in the Angel attack.
"What is it?"
He jumped at Rei's words, and then realized he had been ignoring her questioning gaze for some time, forcing her to speak.
"Kensuke and Touji were outside during the attack last time." The battle would be a lot smoother without them being there. But it's not like they'll listen to me. Or rather, Kensuke wouldn't listen.
"Yes," she observed. "Class Representative Horaki was lax in her duties that day."
"Don't let her hear you say that," he muttered, his mouth twitching.
"Why not?" Rei's innocent question took him by surprise. "Perhaps hearing it would make her more attentive."
"Ah... That's true, I guess." It would mean coming up with some sort of believable story, and talking to her, but talking to Hikari would doubtless be more effective than talking with Kensuke.
Immediately after following Rei into the classroom, Shinji found himself dragged bodily aside by one Touji Suzuhara and his bespectacled accomplice.
"Dude, you totally left us hanging!" Touji's implied humorous threat niggled a bit, but he was still a little startled at the abrupt kidnapping.
"Hey, guys, I didn't know you cared..." He raised both hands in surrender, grinning a bit. He had started walking to school with them earlier than he had originally, but it had not changed much.
"We're your friends, of course we care," Kensuke chided him.
"...about how you managed to break through the ice wall around Ayanami!" Touji interjected.
Of course, Shinji sighed. "Guys, it's really not like that..." He knew it was useless though.
"Hard proof, Ikari!" Touji said adamantly.
"Yours for a price..." Kensuke added enticingly, waving the camera back and forth.
"...aah," Shinji was just beginning to sweat when a quiet voice interrupted the byplay.
"If I have to do so, I will have NERV Security confiscate that."
Rei eyed Kensuke as if he were some sort of insect, before turning to go back to her desk. Touji sank into a seat, smoothing back his unruly hair as he watched Rei's departing form.
"Man, you just got burned," Shinji heard him say to Kensuke as he made his own escape. It wasn't until he was halfway across the room that he remembered he had chosen to sit behind Rei's seat a month ago.
The long dreary class day was interrupted by a question blinking expectantly on his computer screen. Well, it was only a matter of time. Reluctantly glancing back behind him, he caught the smile and wave of the cute black-haired girl who had sent him the electronic message. Akira, if he remembered correctly. After a moment of further consideration, Shinji signed away his fate with a three-letter word. Not ten seconds later, practically the entire class surrounded his desk.
"Oh, wow...!"
"What's it called?"
"-we're so proud of you!"
"...what's it like?"
It still felt good to be the center of such adulation. Half a minute and half a dozen questions later, he remembered that Rei's desk was immediately ahead of his, and that she hated crowds. Her empty desk, he realized. Looking around, he finally saw her making her way out of the room, probably to visit the facilities until the flash-crowd died down.
"You just had to say yes, didn't you?" It was something she would never put into words, but her slender back spoke eloquently enough as she quietly slipped out of the classroom.
Rei methodically ate the lunch Shinji had packed for her. The boy was sitting across the lunchroom, still surrounded by his impromptu crowd. Were it not for the fact that she was in the middle of it all, it would have been interesting to note how circumstances could change so drastically in just a few hours. Earlier that morning she had carefully rebuffed his attempt to get closer to her, and she was already regretting it. Or if she were being honest, she was regretting it more than she had immediately after making the hard decision.
There was no predicting how he would react this time around. Perhaps he would decide to initiate relations with one of the many girls surrounding him. He had not the last time, but he was a different person now. How would such a relationship change what she had with him? Again, there was no way to predict such things, since she had no actual experience in those matters.
What if he grew more distant from her? What if he subsequently decided to stop sleeping in her bed? What if he even decided to move out? As long as he is happy, she thought, quashing the obstinate feelings. I do not care what he does in relation to me, as long as he- A sharp pain constricted her chest at the lie. I do not wish to lose his touch, she admitted to herself. Yet how could she tell him that? He did not know, and had no way of knowing without guessing from her actions. To tell him would be to risk embarrassment and rejection. She was so engrossed in her thoughts that she did not notice the unobtrusive raven-haired girl that sat down a couple of seats away and began eating.
Kensuke's voice startled her. "-umm, did your boyfriend abandon you?" The boy set his tray down beside her place at the long table, and she looked up in time to see him blanch, as if he had just heard his own words. She took a moment to observe her nearly empty lunch box, decide she was done, and rise smoothly from her chair. Ignoring her two would-be tormentors, she walked slowly back to the classroom.
"Real smooth there, Kensuke," the jock needled his friend. "I think you're making progress."
"Wait!" Kensuke called. "I didn't mean it like that...!"
"Then how did you mean it?" Touji asked pointedly. "Just apologize, give her the tape, and be done with it."
"Why don't you guys leave her alone!" Rei was somewhat surprised to hear a new female voice, but she did not turn around. Behind her, the girl's dark purple hair shook as she berated the two stooges. "Can't you see that she's worried about something?"
The sun stood high in the sky, baking all beneath it in the permanent summer brought by Second Impact. Shinji couldn't help but cast furtive glances behind him at the now-toy-sized school that was slowly shrinking into the distance as he and the First Child made their way towards the nearest access route down to NERV headquarters below.
"Your worry is out of proportion to the danger we face." Rei glanced at him side-long as she spoke.
"-ahaha..." He cleared his throat of the nervous laughter before continuing. "You mean from the Angel, or from the Class Rep if she finds out how you set up Touji?" He imagined he could still hear the boy screaming, undoubtedly from a certain female dragging him off by an earlobe.
"Did we not escape undetected?" Rei's questioning tone sounded just a little too innocent, but he was sure he was reading too much into it. "Loose lips sink ships, Ikari," she said, returning her gaze to the front as they walked. "I am aware that you have not been trained to resist interrogation techniques, but surely you can hold your own against a fourteen year old female."
"-ah. Umm... Are we talking about you or Hikari?" he asked hesitantly. "Because that's two right there that I'm not too confident about." At that he could have sworn that a bare shading of pink crossed her cheeks for an instant, but he put it down to his own imagination. In any case she did not respond. Several minutes later he broke the silence again. "I didn't know you had an interest in war history." Referring to her 'loose lips' quote.
"I don't," she answered simply. "The Commander suggested it, among other things, as an area of study while I was growing up."
"...ah."
A minute or two passed before she continued the line of thought.
"For you to recognize it means you studied it yourself," she observed. "Your personality does not suggest that such things would interest you."
He smiled wanly. "Well, it's not like I'm an otaku, but I did pay attention during history, and maybe I did a little extra reading. I guess I'm just like most other guys when it comes to wars, as long as they don't involve me." He knew he should have been happy talking with her like this. It had been over a month since the last time he had been forced to use the power he had for whatever reason been given. Almost he could imagine that everything was normal. That he did not have the power to alter reality by killing himself. It would have been easier were it not for the fact that he was about to go into battle. If the Angel killed him, he would be forced to go through it all again. And again, and again, until he got it right, or decided to give up. It seemed too much like a cosmic prank when he thought seriously about it, which was why he did not often do so.
"It's laundry day," he said, reaching for something, anything, mundane.
"Yes," she affirmed. Half a minute later she continued. "Later this evening I will be undergoing a full check-up, and tonight the Commander will doubtless request that I dine with him."
He nodded absently. He was beginning to recognize the schedule his father kept. "I've got training, but I'll be home before you, probably."
Half an hour later they reached the Linear Rail Line down into the Geofront, and were slowly descending towards the beautiful vista below, facing each other in the small compartment as they often did.
"The Angel is off-schedule."
He nodded at her comment, not surprised that she had timed it so they would still be on the way. It might have seemed suspicious if they arrived too early. Of course this meant that things were already different, which did not sit well with his fluttering stomach. What else is going to be different about this fight? he wondered, glancing out towards the massive pyramid of Central Dogma as the train came level with its apex and continued downwards.
The Angel still had not appeared by the time the train landed. The two meandered their way along the grounds, eventually sinking down against the trunk of a giant tree, enjoying its shade while they waited. The afternoon sun, transferred through the complex mirror systems built into the many skyscrapers of Tokyo-3, filtered down through the canopy of greenery surrounding them laying diffuse patterns of shade onto the forest floor. He glanced over at Rei. Her eyes were closed, her hands clasped over her chest, mimicking his own posture. Or perhaps he had mimicked hers. He closed his eyes, waiting for the alert siren. It never came, and the light filtering down played hypnotically over his closed eyelids. At some point he fell asleep without realizing it.
"We are expected at headquarters soon." The six-word statement drew him back to wakefulness, and he squinted his eyes. The late-afternoon streamers of light from overhead were at a much sharper angle than he last remembered. He resisted the urge to ask the useless question of whether there had been an alert. The past month had been enough to reacquaint him with Rei's dislike of meaningless questions.
Getting to his feet, he walked with her until their paths diverged somewhere deeper inside NERV proper.
Washing the dishes after his solitary supper, Shinji reflected on the fancy stepping he'd have to do the next morning at school. It was fairly common knowledge that he and Rei were both NERV employees, but their schedules almost never took them away from school in the middle of the day. They either had the entire day off, or just went in at night. Maybe I can say it was an unscheduled drill. Of course no amount of explanation would stop his two friends from cross-examining him.
Having stretched the dish-washing out as far as humanly possible, he reluctantly approached the washer and drier in the short alcove next to the door of the apartment. The very threatening door, he realized, gazing at it with some trepidation. The door through which Rei would doubtless come right at the moment he was putting her unmentionables into the wash. Blushing, he hurriedly measured soap into the machine, and carefully but quickly loaded the laundry into it. It was only the second time he had done laundry since moving in, and lady luck was apparently smiling, for he finished without interruption.
He showered and dressed for bed, pausing momentarily at the light switch. The apartment was mostly clean by now. It had not been nearly as wrecked as Misato's when he had first arrived half-a-subjective-year ago, which was surprising. Or not, considering the woman's lifestyle. The wave of melancholy at the thought of his former guardian was no longer overwhelming. Switching out the light, he slipped into bed. Questions and scenarios chased their way around his mind until Rei entered the darkened apartment half an hour later.
Hovering on the edge sleep, he heard the now-familiar sounds of her going through her nightly routine, not even requiring what extra light would have been provided by the overhead fixture. He felt the depression of the mattress to his left, and the usual thrill of electricity shot through him as her unbandaged arm threaded its way under his own and onto his chest over his heart. He suppressed a sigh, knowing it would be yet another hour until he would calm back down and get to sleep.
"-m-maybe we won't have to fight the Angels after all. Maybe they've given up." It was a forlorn hope, but still it was there.
"Maybe." The word whispered its way past his neck.
Shinji opened bleary eyes to find the room still cloaked in darkness, and Rei missing. He came awake instantly, sitting up and looking around in confusion until the soft rustle of cloth told him where she was.
"Rei?"
The light snapped on, and he blinked a couple of times as he adjusted to the relative brightness.
"Shinji." She turned around, slipping the remainder of her school uniform in place onto her shoulders. "We are to report in. The Angel has been found."
Found, as opposed to "...the Angel is attacking." He quickly dressed, catching up to her outside the apartment.
"They didn't tell you anything else?"
"No."
The barest hint of pink was showing on the horizon behind them as they jogged through the darkened streets of Tokyo-3. The early morning was slightly chill, and the lack of sirens and calls for evacuation gave a surreal edge to the atmosphere. The buildings had not even retracted, which seemed to indicate that either the city itself was not in danger, or something was going on with the attack that NERV wanted to keep secret. By the time they got to the nearest Linear Rail station, he was completely out of breath, while Rei showed almost no signs of fatigue except for a spot of pink on each cheek.
"-may... maybe I should start training on my own anyway," he managed to gasp out as he gulped lung-fulls of air while she calmly swiped her NERV card through the reader.
"...maybe," she replied cryptically, and she almost looked like she wanted to speak further, but Shinji was in no condition to do any kind of psychoanalysis, he being too busy trying not to pass out in the street.
The F-Type airframe that carried his Eva through the sky did not so much as rattle or bounce, except in extreme turbulence, which was not surprising since it was very nearly capable of vertical take-off. The last time Shinji had been in the F-Type was when he and Asuka had fought against the twin Angels, and here he was about to engage an Angel still in its embryonic form. She was the only one with experience in such matters, and had he not been there to save her, she would have been crushed in the volcano along with her Unit-02. Besides his strange circumstances, he had no backup, since Rei's Eva had yet to be reactivated. The meandering coastline drew closer, lit-up city and suburbs giving way to a spreading pool of midnight blue that was the sea.
"It's the Eva's diving equipment." Ritsuko's words still played through his mind, as he had looked on at a slightly-more-buff-looking Unit-01. The Eva appeared to be wearing a kind of full-body-suit that hugged its armor-plating like a second skin, except for a rather bulky-looking back-pack. "The Evas were never made to take extreme pressure, which is one of the reasons they don't function well underwater."
"Why not?" he had asked.
"Well, for one, Eva's armor binds under pressure," she had explained, switching over to 'lecture mode.' "The diving equipment has ridges on the inside that fit between the armor plates and prevent binding. And over the long term, the chances of infection and necrosis increases dramatically if any contamination, even sea water, gets between the armor and the Eva's skin and is not thoroughly and quickly cleaned out. It's part of the reason we keep them in the ultra-clean environment NERV provides. The diving suit takes care of both issues."
The giant flying wing traced a slow circle above what showed up on his display as one of the older CGN(X) Nuclear Guided Missile Cruisers that had been part of America's Pacific fleet before it was absorbed into the UN combined fleet. "It's the closest ship we have that's big enough to power the Eva," Misato had told him during the briefing.
"Drop-off in three, two, one, release!" Hyuga's tense voice called out as the restraining bolts retracted, sending the Eva into free-fall. Dark waters rushed up to engulf him, the impact muted by the suit his Eva wore.
"Looking good, Shinji!" Misato's boisterous voice echoed through the comm channel. "I'd say that's a nine point three, right?" It sounded as if she had turned her head to the side to speak to someone.
"Eight point five," Rei's muted voice responded. A bunch of choking and spluttering ensued.
"...Rei, was that a joke?" Misato finally got out. Shinji couldn't help but smile.
"No," Rei said simply.
"...umm, guys, my power," he muttered, glancing at the red numbers counting down as he rebounded off the sea bottom and rose towards where his sensors told him the ship waited.
"-oh, sure," Misato replied. "Drop that thing!" she yelled off-mike.
Shinji heard a crisp "-yes ma'am," followed by a splash above. He caught the power cable on his way up, plugging in as his Eva's head broke the surface of the wave-tossed sea.
"See?" Misato crowed. "Positive buoyancy, just like Ritsuko said! Nothing to worry about..."
"Yeah," Shinji mumbled noncommittally, as the cruiser/Eva combination set off towards the open sea.
Rei stood on the fore-deck of the cruiser with Misato, watching the power umbilical spool out over the edge of the ship via heavy-duty crane and into the water. By now the horizon showed a definite pink, promising a sunrise in the near future. The VTOL which had transported them to the ship rested on its skids on the aft hangar deck, engines still idling.
"As long as his suit holds up, Shinji should be in no danger at all," Misato spoke, Rei supposed, more to calm her own nerves than for any other purpose. "We're directly over the last detection point, and even if he drops to the sea-bed, he's still well within tolerances."
I am worse than useless at this point, Rei decided. Anything that cripples Shinji and forces me to act in my role as backup pilot would be cause for us to return to the beginning and redo the events in hope of a better outcome. In essence, I am his insurance. If he is too crippled to kill himself, I must find some way to do the deed. Is this humor, or irony, I wonder? She pondered whether to ask him later when they were alone.
"Shinji, you should be approaching the target depth," Ritsuko's calm clipped tone betrayed no tension at all, unless you knew what to look for.
"-yes ma'am, but I don't see any... wait, I think I see-" static crackled through the air, gobbling up whatever words might have been uttered by the young pilot.
"Shinji?" Misato nearly shrieked. The lines swayed gently as the sky brightened noticeably. Tension and static crackled through the air, fighting for attention with the crane, which began creaking alarmingly.
"-gaged the electromagnetic cage. I said I've engaged the electromagnetic cage, is anybody up there?"
Misato let out her breath all at once, sinking into a chair. "Thank God. Don't do that to me Shinji."
"...do what?" he asked innocently.
"Never mind. We're bringing you back up."
"Roger. The Angel's secure, I guess."
"Wow, gloomy atmosphere!" Misato exclaimed, dropping her tray onto the table next to Ritsuko's. Besides the two of them, Rei, and Shinji, the NERV cafeteria was empty. "We won! Lighten up, guys..." She fell on her tray like a one-woman pack of starving wolverines.
"-eh, sorry," Shinji gave a wan smile, scratching the back of his head. "Just thinking."
"You're too young to be thinking," Misato said around her food. "Enjoy life! You don't get another shot, you know... what?"
"No, nothing," Shinji averted his gaze, going back to work on his breakfast and trying to wipe the smile off his face. Rei continued to eat quietly and methodically, ignoring the banter. Misato's grin turned feral as she sensed the strange mood.
"You know, Rei, I'm actually kinda jealous," the woman began in far too innocent a tone. "Rits tells me what a great house-keeper Shinji is. I could use some of that around my place, haha..." She might as well have been talking to a brick wall, though a bare hint of pink may have crossed the girl's cheeks momentarily.
"...haven't found anyone to clean up the pig-sty?" The words were out of Shinji's mouth before his brain could intervene. It had been such a hot-button issue with him, he hadn't even thought. He paled as Misato colored.
"And just how do you know the state of my abode, young man?" She spoke with mock fury, but the 'mock' part was lost on the panicking Eva pilot.
"-don't ask me how she gets drunk at such an early hour," Ritsuko said in an undertone, rolling her eyes.
"...um, ah-" He fidgeted and sweated furiously. Fortunately Misato was too buzzed to notice. "-well, the state of your apartment is kind of legendary around NERV depar-"
"-damn that Hyuga!" the raven-haired Captain interrupted Shinji's attempts at an explanation, crossing her arms in frustration and looking to the side as she jumped to exactly the wrong conclusion. "Invite the man over for tea once, and he back-stabs you!"
Sorry Lieutenant, Shinji thought, going back to his meal as Misato launched into a diatribe on the man's perceived faults. Several minutes later the feral look returned.
"-say, with the two of you living together, don't tell me you two are an item!" she stabbed her fork in Shinji's general direction for emphasis. He managed not to blush, and Rei gave no indication she was even aware the three of them were there. "Hey, Rits, have you had 'that' talk with the two of them yet?"
The two teenagers stood up at the exact same time, and Misato burst out laughing. Shinji looked at Rei, who calmly stared back, and the two of them picked up their trays and walked away.
"-ehehe, I think we embarrassed them!"
"Hey, don't drag me into this," Ritsuko insisted. "I still have to be their guardian after today..."
By the time the two pilots had returned to the surface of Tokyo-3, the morning sun had moved its way up to a dominating position in the heavens, and it was very nearly time for school to begin.
"You know, for some reason I'm actually kind of looking forward to school." At his words, Rei glanced over, noting his calm expression, and his hands, which were in his pockets as the two of them walked along. "Maybe it's because I already know the material, so there's less pressure..."
Logical, she decided. Of course it also led right back to the core issue. With less time needed for classwork, he had more time to spend connecting with his classmates in a way he had not the first time around, which would undoubtedly affect his bond with her. She needed more experience with conversation, but the only earnest and heartfelt conversations she ever had were with the Commander concerning their shared purpose. Despite Shinji's deep-seated dislike of piloting, it was the only thing she knew, and so she turned to it as a first attempt.
"The dive to recover the Angel was new for you," Rei began. "And for me as well. What was it like?"
"...um, well, the equipment itself was some kind of form-fitting material that went between the armor somehow to keep it from binding as the pressure increased, and to enhance the Eva's movements-"
"I know the unit's technical specifications," she interrupted, fixing him with her suddenly expressive gaze as they walked. "How did it feel?"
"Um," his surprised glance lingered on hers for a moment. "-it... it felt kind of like wearing another plug suit on top of the one I already had on, actually," he said slowly. She nodded, then noticed that his eyes seemed to shimmer for a moment, before he turned away, blinking rapidly.
"What is it?" she asked. Her interest was purely out of curiosity as to what part of his piloting experience would make him react so, but she had no way of knowing that the very fact that she showed interest at all was what had made him nearly break down. He looked back into her face, as if to assure himself of what he had seen there, before turning away and smiling a little.
"It's just that I've only ever seen you look like that when you talk with my father," he murmured. "You seem cheerful when you talk with him. Happy, even." She pondered his words as they walked along in silence for half a minute. When he spoke again, it startled her, for she thought he had finished his thought. "I remember watching the two of you talk after the successful reactivation of Unit-00, and I remember wishing that just once someone would talk that way with me." As they got closer to the school, the number of students walking around them increased. "I guess I was too busy waiting for someone to just walk up and talk to me like that, I never really thought about what would make two people show an interest in each other in the first place," he admitted. "A common interest," he amended. "Two people talk like that with each other because they have a common interest." He fell silent for another half minute. "I guess what I'm trying to say is, if that's what it takes, I'll be interested in Eva for you-"
"Shinji." The word functioned as she had intended, cutting off his self-destructiveness. Though she had little experience in these kinds of matters, she saw exactly what he was doing, since she had done the same thing herself to try to get closer to the Commander. He was willing to change himself, even painfully so, in order to put up a false front that might bring them closer together. It was something she could not allow, and yet one wrong move here might destroy his ego, or at the very least damage the bond they shared. "What interests you?" she asked carefully. His mouth opened and closed once, and he obviously thought for a moment. "-not Eva," she clarified. "If you are willing to lie about such core matters, there is no point in further conversation."
He looked down, kicking a pebble from his path as he walked, his expression having degenerated almost to anger. "To be honest, before I came here, I really didn't have any purpose at all," he muttered. "Piloting is painful, but at least it means something. At least people praise me for it. Other than Eva, I'm no good at anything," he mumbled. "Without Eva, I'd be nothing." The way he phrased it gave her pause.
"Do you truly wish for Eva to be your purpose?"
He looked into her face as if trying to memorize her features.
"I just don't know."
He turned away, and again she felt the pang of regret from earlier in the day. He had already shown an interest in the gymnastics she practiced, and she had turned him away. Perhaps that had been more of a mistake that she had thought
The two pilots walked into the classroom to a chorus of cheers and clapping. Not prepared for such a show, Rei simply walked over to her desk as if nothing had happened.
"Hey, why didn't ya just tell us you had a drill or somethin'?" Touji said, clapping Shinji on the shoulder. "This guy here was so desperate for battle footage, he practically begged me to help him sneak out!"
"Yeah, I know it's classified and all, but it's kind of obvious since you two are almost never called out in the middle of the day!" Kensuke said excitedly, his camera ready in case Shinji accidentally spoke some state secret.
"You gotta be careful," Touji warned, crossing his arms and striking a pose. "Less honorable people might think you two had snuck off and was behind a building getting it on-ow-OW-OW!" His face contorted as the Class Rep took him by the ear.
"Suzuhara, shame on you!"
Still kind of embarrassed, Shinji smiled and turned to go to his seat, nearly running into Akira.
"...um, congratulations on your successful mission," she said softly, meeting his gaze for a moment.
"How did you guys know about it?" Shinji managed to get his voice back. "I mean, I know Kensuke and the others could have guessed, but-"
"My dad is a Squadron Commander of the fighter wing that was to provide your air cover," she explained, appearing surprised at his interest, and not wanting to ruin the chance to talk. "Since you're back, I assume it went well."
"Ah, yeah, it did." He suddenly looked a little frantic. "-eh, I guess it's not classified that it went well, that is... I hope..."
"-oh! Haha, sorry, putting you in this kind of position...!" she backed away, bowing a little.
"No, it's okay," he replied quickly.
Rei watched from across the room as Shinji conversed with Akira. After an initial conversation, they had drifted away from each other in the original time-line, but Shinji was being more open this time. She was so engrossed in her thoughts that she did not notice the raven-haired girl approach her desk.
"...excuse me, I didn't mean to bother you, but I know you're the top grade in the class." Rei looked at the girl, searching for a name to go with the face. Surprisingly she came up blank. Though she was close with none of them, she thought she knew the names of almost everyone in class.
"Who are you?"
"Oh! I'm Maki. I was just... If it's not too much of a bother, I wondered if you could help me with a few questions I had about our classwork."
Rei considered the request, and what it might entail, glancing back at Shinji who was still chatting with Akira. She seemed to dimly remember a few similar requests in the original time-line, and she remembered rebuffing them, preventing anyone from getting close enough to possibly hurt her. Perhaps allowing this girl to get close would give her insight into what to do with regards to Shinji.
"Alright," she said turning back to Maki, who beamed briefly.
"Thanks so much! Do you mind if I call you Sempai? I know we're in the same grade, but... well, anyway..."
"I don't mind."