CHAPTER TEN: black and blue
Alex sat back, crossed her legs and raised an eyebrow. A move guaranteed to make Marissa melt. She smirked slightly as Marissa bit her lip and glanced out the window.
"What's the secret Riss?" Alex asked, her voice low and soft, using her old nickname for the younger girl. Marissa glanced back at Alex. She knew exactly what the other girl was doing and she also knew that it was going to work way too well. But two could play, right? Marissa stretched her legs out and crossed them at the ankle, her dress sliding away to reveal two long, long legs. She watched Alex's eyes travel down them slowly. The thing was, Marissa didn't feel used or abused like she did when some random guy looked at her, she felt gorgeous and loved and like she was all Alex's.
"It's a secret, Alex. Where's the fun in knowing what's gonna happen?" Actually, Alex didn't really care what Marissa had been talking to the driver about, but she was loving driving Marissa crazy and was loving getting driven crazy by Marissa. She slid down the seat, right next to Marissa and folded one leg under the other.
"C'mon, tell me. Don't make me beg." Alex slowly slid her hand from Marissa's knee up to her thigh, then to the inside of her thigh. Marissa glanced away outside the window, then back to Marissa. She leaned forward suddenly and kissed Alex slow and sweet, something she so shouldn't have been doing, but something she really really wanted to do.
Then the car pulled to a stop and Marissa pulled away slowly. She smiled softly when she saw Alex's closed eyes and she brought her hand up to brush away a lock of blond hair. Her smile faded when she caught sight of her gold wedding band on her finger and she dropped her hand back to her side. She turned to the door and opened it, letting in the sound of crashing waves. Alex's eyes opened quickly. She smiled at the brunette, unaware of the feelings the other girl was wrestling with.
"Is this where…", she left the sentence hanging, not quite sure how to put what had happened on the beach. Marissa nodded.
Alex lay on the sand, her hand entwined in Marissa's, watching the sunset. She sighed happily and looked over at the younger girl, who was smiling softly. Alex glanced down at her left middle finger and Marissa moved her left hand next to Alex's. They both had identical, simple, black butterflies right there. Alex touched her finger to Marissa's and then kissed her softly.
"I love you Marissa." Alex said softly, right in Marissa's ear. Marissa sat up and put one arm on the side of Alex. She looked down at Alex, her brown hair forming a curtain around the two girls.
"I love you Alex." She said, then leaned down and kissed the other girl. Alex grinned and ran her fingers through Marissa's hair.
Marissa stepped out of the car holding her hand out to Alex. Alex took it and entwined her fingers with Marissa's. Surprisingly Marissa didn't pull away. Instead, she squeezed Alex's fingers lightly, but didn't look at her.
"Come back in an hour Jack." Marissa told the chauffeur, who nodded, without even blinking at the two girls holding hands intimately. He got back in the car and pulled away. Alex was thoroughly confused. She knew how she felt. She would leave Rachel in a heartbeat for Marissa, but she wouldn't mess with Marissa's marriage if Marissa was happy. But, first Marissa had kissed her, then told her that she couldn't 'do this'. Then, she had stayed away, but slipped old memories and old feelings into their random conversations. Now, she had played 'let's see who can seduce the other one first' and out and out kissed Alex again. Now they were walking down the beach were they had first admitted love, and they were holding hands.
What the hell? Was all Alex could think, her hand still entwined with Marissa's. They walked down the beach, the waves lapping at Alex's feet. She looked over at Marissa, who was staring out at the last of the setting sun. Everything was quiet except for the water. Alex let go of Marissa's hand on dropped to the ground, out of the way of the water. Marissa stopped and looked down at her, considering something. Then, she sat behind Alex, putting her legs on either side of Alex, her arms around her shoulders. Alex sighed and leaned back against her.
Marissa's mind was going in way to many directions. Ryan, Alex, love, marriage, kissing her. . . she was wrestling with the feelings she held for Alex and she was losing badly. Ryan was a distant memory in the back of her head, but the one thing that was yanking her away from Alex. She could leave him, but it would break his heart, and what about the hotel? What that all she cared about? Other people's lives and feelings? What about her? What about her feelings? Her life? She looked at the blonde in her arms and kissed the top of her head. Then, she saw a freckle behind Alex's ear.
"Found that freckle." She whispered. She kissed it and felt Alex shiver in her arms. Marissa tightened her arms around her. Then, the older girl pulled out of Marissa's arms and turned to face her.
"What are we doing Marissa?" She asked, hurt and love and confusion that she couldn't keep down anymore, swimming in her eyes. Marissa's eyes flicked away, out over the beach.
"I have no idea." She admitted. "I love you Alex, so much, but I love Ryan too." Marissa finally met Alex's gaze.
"Not like this." Alex said, brushing a strand of hair out of Marissa's face. "And he doesn't love you like I love you." Alex was breaking her cardinal rule, messing with other couples. And she didn't feel one bit guilty. "If you don't want me, then just tell me to leave. And stop doing this." Marissa sat there, faced with and ultimatum. Her face was torn as well as her heart. She reached up and kissed Alex on the forehead. Alex sighed, hiding the tears forming in her eyes. She stood up, brushing sand off her jeans. "Alright." She said, and turned and left.