Secret part 6
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When Kakashi woke up again from a dreamless sleep, it was dawn. The chilly air of early morning tingled one of his cheek, and the other was tickled by soft strands of hair. Even when he could not see anything, he knew it was a girl, collapsing her head beside his mattress and…
Her hand was held tightly in his.
The hand was small, soft with slender fingers and so familiar to him
Was it….her?
But the smell was different; it was a mixture of shampoo with disinfectant which was really peculiar to one's nostrils. So who was she that he had held the hand for the whole night? Last night when a little bit of his consciousness still left behind, he was so damned sure that his girl had come back and he could sense it clearly by the hand he caught up.
The sleeping head slightly stirred next to him, letting several filaments continue to tickle his cheek playfully, and Kakashi at last recognized who she was:
You woke up Kakashi-sensei?
Sakura…
Kakashi quickly released her hand and sensed a moment of awkwardness passed by:
Sorry, I made you stay here the whole night
It's ok, sensei, I'm… Naruto and I are so worried about you; It's so great that you aren't in coma anymore. Tsunade shishou is coming back this morning she will make sure when you can leave the hospital
Kakashi took in Sakura's perplexity thus he hurriedly let it go:
Thanks Sakura, you have treated me all these days, haven't you? How long have I been here?
"More than 2 weeks, your conditions were really critical this time…"- She suddenly came to a halt, raising Kakashi's concern as if her voice was broken and then she found it again: "We're really scared that we may have lost you this time, sensei…Kakashi-sensei, welcome back."
Her voice naturally revealed an unhidden cheerfulness mixed with profound bliss which touched Kakashi inside out. This was not the first time and definitely the last time Kakashi stayed here, under Sakura's care and healing. Sakura understood him more than any Medics he knew in his ninja's life. They usually scolded him for overexerting himself in battle and warned him ceaselessly that he should not do this or he should not do that if he wanted to retain his vitality. Since Sakura was in charge of looking after his own health when she reached the age of 16, she never told Kakashi what to do with his physical conditions but patiently cared for and cured each of his gravest wounds over and over as she knew that Kakashi never did unnecessary things to harm himself, whatever he risked his life for, it must be for a really elevated goal: be it to save his comrades' life or be it to complete a mission that could be vital to the existence or the thriving of Konoha. Kakashi was not a teenage boy who just wounded himself while fighting because of impetuosity, so it was really tiring hearing those meaningless reminding. This instance was not an exception, if he did not use the Magenkyou Sharingan the fifth time, Asuma's twin may never saw their mother Kurenai again and Lee would cry for no end if he knew Guy's death and Shikamaru would seek for another revenge for Chouji. Possessing an ultimate weapon which was able to challenge even ninja villages' Kages's power was not a blessing gift as many may thought, actually it gave you less choice when it came to life-and-death situations. Thanks to Sakura's marvelous ability in chakra control and medic experts, Kakashi had raised the number of times when he could use Magenkyou Sharingan not quite harmlessly to four times a day (even Itachi in his prime could only use Magenkyou to only 3 times a day) and also with her advices, Kakashi could use Chidori six times per day, which made him in these recent years virtually invincible in all the five countries since Akatsuki and Orochimaru were eliminated. This S-ranked mission placed him and his comrades in the claws of two criminals whose power was equal to the Sannin. He completed it at last right before those two gathered their troop and formed another hidden village like Orochimaru's sound village and Akatsuki's organization.
Sakura, you're always trying your best to save my life, I…
No, don't say so Kakashi-sensei, you saved my life so many times before, that I can stand here today is thanks to you sensei. I will get angry if you say something so ceremonious…
The mischievousness materialized in Sakura's tone as she scolded Kakashi a bit to make him realize that she was at all times ready to heal him while drove the subject to another more light-hearted direction. Kakashi liked this personality of her – sensitive and delicate. A small smile emerged on Kakashi' masked lips:
Sakura, you know, I hated having my eyes covered like this; can you remove it for me?
You've been comatose for more than 2 weeks, uhm, Okay, I think your eyes have already healed; I can untie it for you. But first, you have to sit up. Do you feel well enough to do that? You've just woken up.
I'm okay, no one has been sleeping longer than me, hasn't he? I've got bored of sleeping you know
Yeah, yeah – Sakura chuckled lightly – Some times I really appreciate your optimism in all cases Kakashi- sensei – and she really meant it, not many men out there could be physically and mentally improved as fast as Kakashi, who could calmly say his over-two-week blackout (an actual life-and-death situation) as a tedious two-week-sleeping. Kakashi seemed to rubbed weakness and illness off his shoulder like small dirt.
Sliding her petite but strong arm across his back and the other under his knee, Sakura cautiously helped Kakashi to a sitting position as he breathed hard:
Well, as for me, it's one of very few items left after so many years. And I really appraise your patience and hard-working Sakura
Thanks, sensei, but I'm really nothing compared to Rock Lee and Naruto.
Trying to stabilize her teacher's stance, Sakura answered modestly
Well, I don't think it's fair if you say like that, Naruto and Rock Lee are masters of patience and hard-working but in an entirely different way from you. They use their mind to perfect their corporal abilities, (I knew you did the same when training with Tsunade-sama, not at their insane level but also very harsh) you, in other way, use your intelligence to perfect your mind. I saw you really went frenzied when you could not find out the optimal way to cure your patients' illness and better operation methods. You had suffered from insomnia for nights while trying to discover special technique to perfect our ninja's skills or raise the number of Naruto's, Rock Lee's and my extraordinary jutsus. You never give up until you nerve-rack your brain and pull it out. Simply put, you can't be compared in your own field, Sakura
Kakashi-sensei…
Sakura felt really nonplus by Kakashi's perceptibility, he's always a reticent type and only used words for necessary purposes but he always noticed everything surreptitiously and mesmerized them correctly without the second's knowing. It was the same reason why he had got that innate lighting-speed thinking "to see underneath the underneath". And he always knew how to warm her heart just like the old days when he smiled gently and rubbed her head to ensure her that "Naruto and Sasuke will be alright". Some where in her mind, she was really proud that he was aware of her efforts and appreciated them, Sakura beamed as she put her hands over his forehead to examine his bandage-covered eyes by her own chakra:
It's all thanks to Tsunade shishou and your training and living beside Naruto, Rock Lee and Sasuke for all these years, sensei, I just don't want to be left behind, you know, and I'm so glad to be helpful to my precious friends. And being a medic, I just don't want to witness anyone die before my eyes just because I hadn't tried my best or just because I hadn't trained well enough. I hate the powerless feelings, It haunted me since…
She halted her confidence, which it was all easily intelligible to Kakashi. There was no need to continue the last two words "Sasuke's death". Kakashi knew, It still wrenched her gut remembering her beloved teammate. But it was not her fault; Sakura as well as Kakashi and Naruto had emptied out all of their chakra that time. But the obsession still lay there, fresh and bold. Sakura's quickly changed the subject:
I've checked your optic nerves with my chakra, they're all healed but you haven't seen light for more than two weeks, it may be hurt when you opened your eyes, so just do it really slowly, okay?
Uhm
Kakashy lightly grunted to let Sakura know he was ready. And then, she leaned closer to his face and undid the knot behind his head, her faint odor suddenly surging into his nose, still mixed with antiseptic but without a warning, he caught up with a very slim feminine whiff pell-mell in the fusion of shampoo and disinfectant, which was very… very similar to that of…Instinctively, he felt his spine go chilly as for no specific reasons.
Kakashi-sensei,
Huh
Sakura's voice interrupted his ears alarmingly, making Kakashi temporarily let out his stupor. He had just been in so deep thought that he completely forgot the doffing off of each of his bandage layers. Sakura continued with complete unbeknownst:
You can open your eyes now sensei, just make it real slow, don't look straight back to the window, look down on the floor first
Kakashi quietly followed Sakura's advice to open his eyes steadily. The light still hurt his eyes as she had warned but it was greatly subdued as he focused on the ground. And the first thing he saw was Sakura's pink lips, looking unexpectedly delicious and fanatical…
strangely familiar…
and simply odd…
Kakashi suddenly felt weak to which his present illness has no contribution. It was just a sickish feeling disturbing him, interrupting him, provoking him…It exacerbated every jiff passed by…and his soul was quavering terribly…
This feeling was really sick…
Never in his life, Kakashi felt more unpleasant …
- Kakashi-sensei
The loud "smack" sound disappeared as quickly as when it appeared, immediately swallowed by the thin air but the bitter and astounded predicament left behind probably obsessed the two occupants of this small hospital's room permanently.
If Sakura had not been too busy to look at the man before her who had just ruthlessly jerked her hand away from his shoulder with the back of his hand and was now looking at her with the same shocking eyes like hers after instantaneously revolving his head to Sakura's direction (he was also extremely astonished by his own act), she would have noticed the burning soreness and the reddened skin on her palm. This was the second time a man on the infirmary's bed treated her this rude when they were both in their deep thoughts and she had no idea why they all of a sudden turned violent against her for no rationales…but there was one thing different…this time….
Kakashi completely realized what he had just done, unlike Sasuke, who did not give a damned care about his acts and left the twelve-year-old Sakura on the verge of tear…Kakashi noticed and dazed too but still it was too late….
Something was torn apart inside those brightly jade eyes darkened with upset
and anguish…and somehow, it wrenched him seeing her in that state. Kakashi tried so hard to get away from this speechlessness but words jut could not make their ways to his tongue anymore… He just stared at her, partly wanted to plead guilty, partly wanted to keep silence, and at last he kept silent and felt ten times worse than opening his mouth and saying something to apologize her…
Before they could do anything to break the deadly uncomfortable quietness, some one else did it for them…
I TOLD YOU TO TAKE CARE OF….
I TRIED MY BEST… BUT…
I DON'T WANT TO HEAR YOUR LAME EXCUSES; YOU'RE NEVER THERE WHEN NEEDED!!!
In a blink, those emotions vanished
The loud clamour of the two (every one could guess it) blondes racketed the hospital in the most disturbing way. It was nearly unacceptable when it came from a Hokage and a soon-to-be Hokage but in Konoha, people got used to it.
There you are!!!
Kakashi-sensei, I'm glad that you woke up
The cheerful orange clad ninja and a fuming Hokage came into view of the two former teacher and student. Tsunade looked no fun at all in Kakashi's direction and strode angrily towards him.
"She's mad, is it because I overdid myself again and she had to come back soon to take care of my health's remnants?" – thought Kakashi nervously as he recalled the time when the whole western tower was ruined under the fifth Hokage's fists… But before he could defend himself, he realized that he was not the target of her wrath:
"Sakura, I told you thousands of time, don't risk yourself because of some old perverts, wait for me to come back, I'm too old now, you know, It's still a waste when I treated them but not as lavish as you, why don't you listen to me???"
Grabbing both the upper arms of Sakura and shaking her irately, Tsunade really did not note the discomfited frown on Kakashi's face when being compared to an old pervert and a "waste of time". Every one knew that Tsunade intensely loved Sakura like her own daughter as she saw almost all her personalities inside this lass and even some outdid abilities and so worried about her risking her own life to save Kakashi but her acts now was an exaggeration. Sakura was not a little child needing mum to keep an eye on her or watch behind her back anymore.
" Shishou, Kakashi-sensei is not some one, and I can't wait when you come back, it was just too late back then and you see that Shizune-senpai and I could manage it well" – said Sakura in a slightly heatedly sulky tone
In the entire village, except for the impertinent behaviour of Naruto right at the first time he met the fifth Hokage, no one was allowed to have that kind of voice (so familiar with the way of a petulant daughter) to Tsunade without her crashing them into ashes and Sakura was the only one who could reduce an enraged Hokage to a concerned mother-like woman:
"I know you're brilliant, Sakura but…"
" You're worried too much, Shishou, I'm Okay"
Sakura interrupted Tsunade but in a much more gentle way with a warm smile, showing that she was really touched by her shishou's concern.
" well, you're here now, I'm sure I don't have to overexert myself any longer, am I right? – said Sakura with a soothing tone when eyeing Tsunade with her puppy's eyes - I have checked his conditions, he seems to recover greatly but I'm not sure about the after-effect, Tsunade- shishou, he really depends on you…I want to go home and have some…some sleep now. See you later, Shishou.
Giving a long yawn with her hand covering her mouth, Sakura turned to Kakashi to say good bye. Her face just looked absolutely normal with the usual sunny smile, which startlingly tugged Kakashi's guts with a rapid, short force. Easily concealing his own confusion, Kakashi responded to her farewell coolly with the same lazy manner: "see ya, Sakura".
Then, she clung on Naruto's crooked arm to leave the room. Kakashi noticed Tsunade's worrying eyes remaining on Sakura's back until she was completely out of sight. Then she swiftly turned to glare at him with arrogance and annoyance on her face:
"Kakashi, take care of yourself, Sakura is not always there to look after you, you've got that??"
"It seems that I'm not out of luck any time soon, she's always the first and the quickest one saving me" – Kakashi chuckled
You won't have that luck long if you keep throwing your life to the death's gate like that, Your life is saved by Sakura, remember it and treasure it –Tsunade commanded sharply without any hints of trifle.
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"Kakashi"
The girl whispered sweetly before planting those mad kisses on his lips, sucking his tongue with ferocity and possession. She was consuming him and unleashing the repressed lust the two had suffered since he had to get on the clinic's bed. Her slippery, damp and soft lips was urging him to take more of her and her hand fumbled fervently about his patient's shirt buttons, it took her a lot of efforts not to yank it open instead of undoing it one by one – an act requiring so much patience and distress in such an extremely-needed-to-hurry-up moment. Kakashi's hands rapidly slide under her garment to her bare skin and up to the hem of her panties. She was wearing a thin dress today, the kind that he could easily move his fingers unlimitedly from her knees to her thighs, then to her belly, her navel, and lastly, her firm breasts with her perky nipples in a smooth, unbroken intimate trail. Kakashi blatantly sensed her shudder with sensual excitement when she felt his arousal forming promptly against her thigh, in a swift movement, he grabbed her upper arm and rolled her down under his weight, he did not let her ride on top this time when he could certainly please her need better when he was in control of everything… But then, he took in the fact that, he did not wear any eye-covering cloth… he opened his eyes when the kiss was breaking right before he could stop himself
Pink lip…
Pink hair…
Sakura…
"NO…"
The shriek pierced Kakashi's ears painfully and he did not even know whether it came from… was it from his pinky nightmare or was it from his shaking mentality or was it his own denial scream. He was just too busy in his whirling mind to notice his hard, short pants and his bodily perspiration. Usually all men like their wet dreams with whoever appeared in those lecherous imaginings, but in actuality, Kakashi totally did not feel the same. HE HAD JUST WET-DREAMED OF HIS OWN STUDENT – This made him feel like a bastard. Who could ever dream of a girl he considered as his own daughter and his beloved student' fiancé? What's on earth make he think that she was his clandestine lover?
Oh, gosh, he just wanted to bang his head onto the window sill if possible…
Just a faint smell wasn't a convincing proof. Girls wearing the same kind of perfume which was fashionable – that's all…his right mind reasoned…
But it was not the perfume, it was her unique smell that you had inhaled thousands of times and your nostrils get so used to that you could not make any mistakes … his left mind protested heatedly…
No, It could not be Sakura, not in this life or any other life, this was just a serious, stupid mistake…
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Sneaking out of the hospital's bed was always the first idea coming to Kakashi's mind when he sensed his recovery much before any one could realize. He hated hospital to the core and every body knew that: too much people in and out everyday, too much visits and too much rusty smell of antiseptic. There was no privacy at all and he felt sicker with the thought of a paralyzed patient. Then, when he could lie fully on his comfy bed at home and think more properly about oddities happening to him since the utterly disgusting nightmare, why did him have to linger longer in this unbearable place? So, taking the house-roof path through the window was his number one choice to avoid any intervention and prevention. It would not have took him long to come back his home safely and soundly if he had not seen a glimpse of pink and blond top-head right down a narrow and deserted alley. He came to a halt as quiet as a tingle of air right above the roof lined with the others surrounding the lane. Normally Kakashi was not that low to spy on his close people as he already trusted them enough to think they could do something disastrous to Konoha. Kakashi trusted few people in his life and since his faith was given, it was a life – commitment. But not at this time, when his faith was vacillated, he really had no idea why he stopped all of a sudden and decided to return to his old day of being an Anbu leader. Sixth sense told him there was somewhat unusual occurring between the two best friends/rivals Sakura and Ino - Something strong enough to draw them away from busy street to this narrow lane to have a secret's talk which was reflected by the seriousness and tension on those two delicate facial features. Something he - should know which can clear off some of his suspicions.
"you're surely hiding something from me Sakura, you acted so strange recently"
Ino whispered heatedly but Kakashi skilled ears let no words she said pass by unnoticed.
Ino, you're too skeptical – Sakura hissed depressively, her eyebrows knitted in a very, very bothersome way of being interrogated by her own best friend – There's nothing wrong with me, It's just the works you know, If you say that I'm overworked, It's true, I work too much just now but nothing as sneaky or eccentric as you insist.
Don't you dare to get rid of me with that lame excuses, Sakura, I know you for all of my life, I know that something wrong happening to you. You disappeared very often for the last 6 months, and no one know where you are – Ino ground out , failing the attempts to keep her voice quiet
Ino, I've carried out missions with Naruto, they are all A-rank or S-rank, and don't you say that I have to report it to you every time I leave Konoha? It's so ridiculous of you – Sakura sniggered without any tingles of amusement – it was rather a tiring laugh.
"It's true that You'd carried out a lot of missions with Naruto lately, but sometimes you just vanished and Naruto seemed to cover it up for you, he did not do any missions these times and you were no where to be found. I know it for sure cuz' I'm working in the office of mission-scroll storing with Shizune-senpai, Sakura, in case you don't remember, even if I was never in charge of finding or giving the mission scroll for you, It doesn't mean I don't know. Nearly 3 weeks ago, you just completely gone for ten days and there was no mission for both of you and Naruto. When you came back, you avoided to explain to me. Sakura, I'm really worried about you, what's happened to you?"
Struck by the sheer patent proofs given by Ino, Sakura was nearly speechless. She should know better that her friend was really a sharp thinker, she was originated from a traditional ninja-family (not a great clan but still a ninja family) and she had the habits of collecting enough information and evidences to expose an incident that confronted their nosiness. But even Ino was so famous for her gossip ability; she did not do this for Sakura so often when she was really cared about her and the frown and troubled glint shining from her face when she said "I'm so worried about you" really moved Sakura. And on Sakura did a thing that amazed both Ino and the man on the roof: wrapping her arm around her beloved friend's shoulder, resting her head on her own forearm, Sakura hugged the blonde tight and murmured softly to her ear:
Thank you Ino… she paused for a second then continued … for always being my best friend, caring about me, taking after me since childhood…you always give me the best motivation to go on in this path, I can really tell you about everything if it is possible, but this time, please. Don't ask me anything… I'm fine, Ino…
Sakura…
If this low and gentle and heartrending voice could not seal Ino's lips, so there was nothing could and she was whipped at last. She only confirmed one thing that there was definitely something wrong with Sakura but found no way to break into the darkness of her secret. She had, obviously, stopped her discovery here. At this moment, Kakashi without a tiny sound crept out of the scene, with a great deal of mishmash in his head.
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"Nearly three weeks ago"
"ten days"
The words ricocheting inside his head following a map of matrix disquiet his mind in the most frustrating sense. As usual when people found out a truth that they themselves found so hard to face up to, their brain created reasons for them to evade it or defend it. The Copy Ninja was not inescapable an ordinary man after all, put his feet on the same road. "Everything was just coincidence". He kept telling himself that but found it hard to believe time after time. As a renowned shinobi, Kakashi never believed much in coincidence, there were always raison d'être behind everything and for a shinobi, believing in coincidence was nothing different from signing the death's paper or killing himself soon. It was actually a good tactics for a ninja to infiltrate confidential information from their foes by staging a coincidence to leave no trait from which the nemesis could follow. "There was no coincidence, remember it" – this was the first thing he learnt from his master - Yellow Flash when he became chunnin.
"If there is no coincidence, so what can I do now?"
Gulping down a large sip of wine, Kakashi jadedly wiped away the liquid dripping from the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand. He snickered mournfully as the night breeze blew onto his face. He had promised that he would never push himself in any kind of dilemma or matrix of love as he could live well without it, but now, he had created a hell of complication. One step wrong and you had to go a mile. Old sayings were hard to break as Hokage's monument. If he had not accepted the game at the first time, if he had satisfied with one night stand…
In this cloud of mistrust, he wanted to clear out all the jumbles and figure out the truth since Kakashi always hated ambiguity. He was a lonesome man, keeping all secrets for himself, worshipping privacy but clear about the whole lot around him since the first day of being a ninja: What a man he wanted to become and what kind of live he would lead and who he should trust for life. And being a ninja meant collecting and discovering secrets. As for countless experiences accumulated through 25 years in this career, Kakashi knew for sure that some times, it was better if one did not know the truth or were never aware of it. It was not evasion; it was totally different from that. Evasion was when you knew the truth but you could not encounter it but unbeknownst meant you were completely unaware of the terrible truth. Kakashi had seen plenty of samples for this fact such as the case a man insisted on hiring ninja to trace down the origin of his respected father and eventually found out that his father was an fugitive criminal who killed a lot of people before changing his name, getting rich, and becoming a generous lord.
It was when the other, weaker mind interfered him with utmost fear. If it was really Sakura… the sheer thought of it made him loathed himself, preventing him from thinking any further…
He still had two clues elucidated: Sakura had a short hair and whether she got a mole on her back-hip?
At this point, he had no turning-back. Deep inside his head, he prayed that all his doubt was wrong…
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