I know you're Alone
Author's note: loosely from "I Know You're Lonely" by Gannent but a Beast Boy Terra fic. I own nothing. I'm lucky to own the plot.
I wake up next to Beast boy and I feel his warmth surround me. Everything was perfect. Well it was perfect, and then I remembered what we did last night. I didn't regret doing it. I just felt bad since I was going to be leaving after I turned 18.
I thought back to what we did last night. It was beautiful and perfect, well as far as a first time goes. It hurt really terribly and I wasn't able to enjoy it much. But, Beast boy enjoyed it so I felt better about myself. I was able to make the one I love feel fantastic. I cuddled closer to him and I nuzzled into his neck. I soon heard him suck in a deep breath, telling me that he woke up.
"Good morning, beautiful girl." He whispered into my ear.
"Good morning." I whispered back.
"Terra, you seem upset."
"Well, I just feel different. Beast boy, I just want you to know that this doesn't change the fact that I'm leaving when I'm turn 18. I love you but I need to go for myself. I need to go to college to be me. I'll miss you but it's the right thing to do."
"I know. I love you but I'll let you go. I just hope that you'll come back to me when you can. I'll always be here for you. I'm just glad that I was your first and you were mine." Beast boy's eyes started to water and I felt mine start to water too. This was a sad and emotional day.
"Beast Boy, I think you should go. Before this becomes hard then it has to be." I said to him while trying to hold back sobs but failing miserably.
"Okay. I love you."
"And I love you. Always."
He kissed me on my forehead and started getting dressed. Soon he turned back into the green dove that he was when he came to me last night. I went back to my bed and curled up against the pillow that he slept with last night. I just wanted to feel close to him again. I knew he couldn't stay with me any longer, it would get too hard. I didn't feel like myself any longer. I felt different. I knew I had lost my virginity so that part of my life was over. I feel like maybe I shouldn't go, but I know that in the long run, this is for the best. And that's what I have to keep telling myself, this is for the best.
*****A week later*****
Today was my birthday. I was turning 18 at 5:34 pm. I had been packing and getting everything together for this whole past week. I had shipped some of it to my dorm room so the plane ride to New York would be easier. I would just take a suitcase onto the plane the rest was already there. It's not like I had much to pack. I got out of my bed and started to make my way downstairs.
"Happy Birthday, Tara!" I heard my adoptive family shout. My mom and dad and sister all stood around the table topped with chocolate pancakes and lots of presents, this was very new for me. I looked at all of them and couldn't help but smile. This was so nice and it was all hard to take in. My memories from when I was a little kid were never like this. Birthdays weren't celebrated in my old home, it was just another day.
"Thanks you guys, this is all so fantastic."
I sat down and ate my pancakes, afterwards I opened my presents. My mom and dad had gotten me a laptop. And my little sister had made me a pretty friendship bracelet. I thanked them profusely. I then brought the things up to my room so I could start getting ready for work and made sure I had all my plane tickets and boarding passes in order for tomorrow. When I looked at my bed, I noticed a small white note taped to a stack of presents. I sat down and read it.
'Terra,
I've always loved you and always will.
I want to let you know that I'm here for you and when you find yourself, come back to me.
I'll always be yours. No one can ever take your place.
That night we shared together a week ago was truly amazing and I meant everything I said that night
You are the most beautiful girl I have ever met. I'll never forget you.
Love always,
Garfield Logan (Beast Boy)'
I just sat there and I cried. Through my tears I was able to open my presents. One was the heart shaped box I had left behind with my butterfly clip inside it. Another was a picture of all the titans. Starfire got me a gorgeous red dress that looked to be my size. Raven gave me a book on controlling emotions and meditation. Cyborg gave me a rape whistle and pepper spray. And Robin gave me an ipod since I used to always steal his whenever I worked out. There was also a communicator for in case I needed them. The last small gift was a ring from Beast boy. Inside the box there was a little note.
'I promise to love you forever.'
I knew instantly that it was a promise ring and not an engagement ring. I held the communicator to my chest and start to cry harder. This still changed nothing. I had to go. I needed to explore and have another adventure. College would be my adventure. I quickly took a shower, got dressed and I went to work. Little did she know, a little green dove was watching her as she cried.