Blair woke with a start as a key card fumbled in the lock of her door. Rising from her bed, she drew on one of Serena's borrowed silk robes. Having left Jack with only the clothes on her back, she had been reduced to wearing Serena's borrowed things. Tripping over the hem of the robe, Blair cursed Serena's long, coltish legs.
With a last longing look at the rumpled silken sheets of her bed, Blair exited the bedroom. Entering the main room of the penthouse suite she was startled to find Chuck Bass leading a porter with a wheeled cart of steaming metal domed dishes into the room's small dining area. Dismissing the waiter with a wave, Chuck began removing the covers of various dishes of breakfast foods.
"Boundaries, Bass?" Blair asked with irritation, tying her robe tightly around her waist.
Chuck paused to leer appreciatively at Blair, his gaze taking in the slightly mussed curls that reminded him of so many mornings spent lying in bed after a vigorous bout of lovemaking. Attired in an emerald green silk negligee and matching robe it took all of his willpower not to walk over, take her in his arms and carry her to the bedroom.
"Relax, it's only breakfast," he replied sarcastically.
"That's not the point," Blair huffed. "You said you would keep your distance."
Chuck finished loading the last of the breakfast dishes on the table before turning to look at her with frustration. "You promised to eat, yesterday."
"I did," Blair said defensively.
"So neither one of us keeps our promises," Chuck said wryly, seating himself at the table and helping himself to some golden, flaky waffles. "And some grapes and a slice of melon do not count as eating."
"So now you are spying on me, just like Jack?" Blair asked angrily, trying to ignore her hunger as Chuck piled freshly whipped cream and berries on his waffles.
"It is not spying when the chef complains to me about his delicious meal being returned practically untouched. You know chefs and their ego's."
"No, but I know Bass men and their ego's," Blair complained haughtily.
Chuck smiled tightly, pushing out the empty chair next to himself. "Have a seat."
Blair gazed longingly at the piles of food as their delicious aroma's wafted under her nose. To her dismay and embarrassment her stomach chose that exact moment to emit a low growl.
Chuck laughed and slid the plate of waffles closer to Blair. "I don't bite. That is, of course, unless you want me to." His eyes wandered heatedly over her slender form, clinging to her curves, and Blair flushed as her heart sped up in her chest.
Pointedly ignoring him, she sat down. Chuck watched as she delicately speared one waffle, adding just the tiniest amount of whipped cream and a small pile of fresh fruit. Out of the corner of his eyes he observed every bite she took, smiling to himself with satisfaction when she had consumed most of the waffle.
Pushing back her plate, Blair took a small sip of orange juice, enjoying the way the tart taste flowed over her taste buds. "So what happens now?"
"What do you want to happen?" Chuck asked lightly, leaning back in his chair.
Blair clutched the linen table napkin between her knuckles nervously. "I don't know. I don't know who I am, I have no money and no home."
Chuck leaned forward in his chair, his hand reaching out to lightly touch her arm for a moment, before falling once more to his side. "You are Blair Waldorf and I am your home," Chuck said firmly.
"When you look at me you see, Blair Waldorf," Blair paused and turned her gaze on Chuck, her eyes begging for understanding. "But when I look in the mirror I see another person entirely."
"Audrey Hawthorne," Chuck interjected.
Blair nodded, blinking away the tears that were already gathering in the corners of her eyes. "I don't know if or when I will ever be her."
"But you have started to remember things?"
Blair flushed, looking away from Chuck. "I have," she said in a small voice. "Just not anything that would be helpful."
"I would disagree," Chuck, said his voice low and husky. "You are remembering the happiest and most important moments in Blair's life."
Blair's cheek turned as red as ripe apples. "So Blair's most memorable moments consisted of sex?"
"With me," Chuck replied with a leer, the devil dancing in his eyes. "Perhaps a demonstration is in order?"
"There is more to life than sex," Blair replied disdainfully, rolling her eyes.
"Then you are doing it wrong," Chuck drawled. A muscle clenched in his jaw, his eyes growing ice-cold as a thought occurred to him. "He hasn't touched you has he?" Chuck asked, his voice sharp.
Blair looked down at her hands, her fingers against their will twisted and pulled at the engagement ring that still adorned her finger. "I—".
Chuck rose from his chair and picking up his empty glass of orange juice he threw it against the wall. Together they watched the liquid splatter and rush to the floor. Walking over to the built-in bar, Chuck poured a glass of his favorite scotch polishing it off in one gulp.
Blair watched with shock as he than poured another and ran his fingers agitatedly through his hair. "I will kill him."
She didn't for one moment doubt the truth of his statement. His hand already raising the glass to his lips, Blair rushed to stop him from taking another drink. Untangling his clenching fingers one by one from the glass, she twined them in hers and led him away from the bar.
"It isn't what you think. I am a virgin. Or at least Audrey is. Jack and I were waiting for our wedding night."
Chuck stared at her in bemusement, his anger falling away as the enormity of her statement hit him. "You're a virgin?"
"Yes," she replied simply, avoiding his eyes.
"Blair Waldorf was not a virgin," Chuck said with a smirk. "In fact—."
"I got that from the memories," Blair interrupted, hastily. "No need to go into details"
Chuck advanced on her, with each step forward he took; she took one step backwards until she ran into the back of the couch. With one hand Chuck reached up to cup her face, his caress tender and reverent. "Blair," he murmured.
Blair leaned into his touch, for just a moment recalling the loving and passionate Chuck from her visions who touched her with such gentleness. Staring deeply into his eyes, she felt like she was drowning in a vortex of need and want. Her body wanted him, her nipples hardening painfully, her thighs growing moist at his nearness. Her body knew him, recognized him, and it terrified her.
"My name is Audrey," she said coldly.
Chuck groaned aloud. "How many times must we go through this? You are Blair Waldorf. Just accept it."
Blair looked at him with pain filled eyes. "I can't. It isn't that easy. You are asking me to throw away my entire identity. Right now Audrey is all I know."
"It won't last. I promise you will remember and then you will be mine again," Chuck vowed.
"You don't know that!" Blair shouted. "What if this is all there is?"
"I won't accept that. Audrey or Blair - I will show you that you belong to me."
Chuck's lips came crashing down on hers, his tongue plunging passionately into her mouth. Blair raised her hands to push him away, only to have them forsake her by clutching Chuck's silk shirt and drawing him even closer to her. With a moan she gave in, softly opening her mouth to his onslaught. She was drowning in passion as flames licked at her skin. She wanted, no, she needed him, now. His hand slid the shoulder of her robe down; baring soft, ivory skin.
The sound of the key card in the lock brought her back to reality. Afraid at how easily she had succumbed to his kisses she pushed him away. Running to the opposite end of the room she waited for him to curse at her in anger. Instead - to her surprise - he only smiled.
"Audrey," Serena greeted cheerily, as she entered the penthouse suite.
"Does everyone have a key to my room?" Blair called out with irritation.
"As always, perfect timing, Serena." Chuck said cuttingly, smoothing his shirt and tucking it back into his trousers.
"I'm sorry, did I interrupt something?" Serena said, looking at Chuck warningly. She wasn't blind and she knew Chuck.
Blair shrugged her shoulders, rolling her eyes. "Nothing important."
Serena smiled, holding out her arm to the figure that had been waiting patiently in the doorway.
"Audrey, I'd like you to meet Nate, the fourth member of our little Breakfast Club."
Nate stepped into the room and with a joyful smile on his face he rushed to embrace Blair. "I thought you were dead." Placing a hand under her chin he lifted her head up so he could better look into her eyes. "I can see now Chuck was right. It's you, really you," he said with awe. Wetness glimmered in the corners of his eyes as he leaned in to press his lips gently against her forehead.
Instead of pushing him away, Blair leaned into his embrace. His innocent happiness at seeing her tugged at the wall she had built around her heart. Of all people she understood what it was like to lose something precious. For the first time she felt safe and warm. It wasn't like being home, but it felt comfortable. Not at all like the terrifying fire that seemed to consume her when she looked at Chuck.
Chuck glared at the two of them in shock, his chest suddenly feeling tight and raw like an exposed wound. The comfort and ease with which Blair had succumbed to Nate's arms made him feel sick. While he had suspected Nate might still harbor feelings for his fiancé he hadn't expected him to act on them this soon, or that Blair would reciprocate.
Suddenly feeling very much like a stranger intruding on something very private, Chuck cleared his throat, looking to Serena for help. He didn't know whether to punch Nate, grab Blair or a combination of the two. To his intense relief Serena gave a nod that she understood and would help, relaxing the needle like tension he had been feeling ever since Nate had entered the room.
"Nate, Blair really needs to get dressed. She is still in her negligee, and we have tons of things we need to do, so now is really not the time for you to revisit old times," Serena said sharply.
Gently Blair pushed Nate away as if he was as fragile as glass. "I will be back and then we will have plenty of time to reminisce."
"I brought you some more clothes, Blair," Serena announced happily, rolling a suitcase on wheels into the bedroom.
"As much as I love wearing your cast-offs, and by that I mean I don't," Blair said pointedly, with a friendly look in Serena's direction that softened her tone. "I need to get my own clothes back from Jack."
"You will not wear another article of clothing that asshole has bought you as long as there is breath in my body."
"Who are you to stop me?" Blair asked Chuck tartly. "Those are my clothes, that I picked out. They are mine not Jack's."
"Try me, Blair. You wear anything from that man and I will tear it off you so fast your head will spin," Chuck said harshly. Noticing the way her chin rose at him stubbornly and her eyes flashed he wisely decided on a different tactic. "Then again maybe this is part of your ploy to seduce me. Maybe you want me to rip your clothes off?" Chuck asked, giving her a lazy smile.
"Chuck, I really don't think that is appropriate," Nate replied hesitatingly. "If she wants to wear Jack's clothes I really don't think we should pressure her otherwise. She has," Nate had to swallow before continuing, "been wearing clothes provided by him for the last few years and if that makes her feel more comfortable then let her."
Shaking his head, Chuck caught and held Blair's eyes. "No, absolutely not. Nothing that has any association with Jack will ever touch you again," he said with a tone that forbade any argument.
"Then what would you have me wear?" Blair asked coolly.
"You have to ask?" Chuck drawled.
"I am not going to go traipsing all over NY in Serena's robes and negligees," Blair said disdainfully.
Chuck's eyes glinted mischievously. "As lovely and satisfying as that would be, I had hoped that you would allow me to take you shopping, instead."
"What, so you can play at Pretty Woman?"
"You are hardly a prostitute and I am not a pimp. Although we can play that if you like," Chuck leered.
Blair, suddenly feeling very naked and exposed, clutched at the belt of her robe, drawing it even closer. "Do I have any money of my own?" She asked turning to look at Serena and Nate.
"Yes, but in your will it reverted back to me." Chuck said with a devious grin. "If you want any you better be prepared to treat me very nice."
"You make me sick," Blair spat.
"Music to my ears, Blair," Chuck taunted lazily. "Keep it up and I won't be able to keep my hands off you."
Nate sighed heavily, "He's right Blair. Chuck received your estate when you died. Until you petition the courts and overturn your death certificate he holds your purse strings."
"However, if Chuck wanted to get in your good graces perhaps he would just hand the money over," Serena interjected with a pleading look in Chuck's direction.
"If not, I am perfectly willing to be at your service. I have more then enough to buy you a new wardrobe," Nate offered with a smile.
"No," Chuck said sharply. "She is my fiancé and I will take care of her."
Blair's eyes darkened, her mouth tightening into a thin line. "I am not your fiancé anymore," she said accusingly. "I don't want to be beholden to you or anyone. If you would just hand over what I am owed without the court system I would be very appreciative."
Chuck regarded her slowly through slit eyes. "I believe I can advance you enough to cover a new wardrobe before we go through the court systems. Which we will need to do to in order to have you declared alive."
"Well, thank you for giving me my money to spend," Blair said flatly.
"Just one request, you go shopping with me," Chuck said with a shrug.
Serena looked at Chuck in puzzlement. "Why on earth would you want to go shopping for girls clothing?"
Made aware of the absurdity of her question as all eyes turned to her, Serena slapped her forehead with her hand. "Never mind. That is ridiculous, Blair, I will pay for your clothes."
"No, I am sick and tired of using everyone else's money. If Chuck is truly offering to allow me to spend my own money I am perfectly willing to have him tag along for hours upon hours of shopping and deliberating over what outfit makes me look less fat," Blair said with a sneaky look at Serena. She was sure that like most males Chuck would be bored after the first hour and would soon be begging to be released from their deal.
"I can't imagine a better way to spend the day than watching you parade around in various states of undress," Chuck replied with a lascivious wink. "I'll wait for you to get dressed and then we will go."
"Would you like me to come with you?" Nate offered. He was almost afraid that if he let her out of his sight she would disappear once more.
Blair smiled at him gently. "No, I think it is better if it is just Chuck and I. I promise when I get back we will spend some time together. I want to know everything about our past." She really didn't, but she understood that that was what Nate needed to hear.
"Dinner tonight?" Nate asked hopefully.
Blair was about to refuse, plead exhaustion, but she didn't get a chance.
"She's busy," Chuck said coldly.
Whirling her head around, Blair glared at Chuck. How dare he plan her schedule as if she was one of his many subordinates? "I'd be delighted," she accepted sweetly.
Chuck flicked an icy glance in Nate's direction as he hugged Blair goodbye and promised to return later that evening. Serena, catching Chuck's eye, tried to reassure him that all would be well. Even though she wondered, with a sinking heart, if perhaps Blair spending time with Nate was not the best idea. Either way she wasn't about to intrude on anything that made Blair happy. With a little wave at Blair she left the room.
Heading into her bedroom Blair rummaged through the clothes in Serena's suitcase. With careful deliberation she chose the plainest, most figure covering clothes she could.
When Blair exited the bedroom in a long sundress with a jacket buttoned all the way to her neck, and her hair pulled back in a prim bun, Chuck had to grin. The whole outfit went against everything Blair was. Chuck may not know Audrey, but he knew that Blair would never willingly wear something like that unless she was trying to prove a point. Deliberate or subconscious? He mused briefly before realizing the truth in her small mouth and fiery eyes. She was fighting him, declaring war in her own way.
He had never been able to resist taunting her. "Submission is not your forte, Blair. Hide as much as you like in those clothes, but nothing will keep me from remembering every delicious curve of your body, in painstaking detail." he rasped.
Blair wanted to retort something clever and witty, but she was suddenly mesmerized. Her eyes focused on his tie, the dark silk knot that had slipped. Almost as if it had been tugged down a little in frustration. The top button of his shirt was undone as if he had found the constriction of his clothes annoying. Her gaze centered on his taunt throat that rose above his tie and her mouth went dry. She suddenly remembered with knife like precision exactly how and where he liked to be kissed and touched.
"Here," Chuck said walking towards her with a glass of scotch in his hand. "I think you need this more than I do."
"No," she shook her head. "I need all my faculties in running order if I am going to be dealing with Chuck Bass."
Chuck merely smiled. He would have to have been blind not to notice the effect he had on her. The sad thing was that even in her very unflattering clothes he was still so sexually charged by her appearance that he wanted to lift her dress and bend her over the couch then and there. If only he could get her to understand that they belonged together. Where Blair began Chuck ended.
"I had the limo brought around."
Blair gave him a look of distaste. "That damn limo, you know exactly what it does to me and yet you persist in throwing it in my face every chance you get."
Chuck cast her a look of wide-eyed innocence. "I have no idea what you' re talking about."
"I lost my virginity to you in that limo and every time I am in it I relive it over and over. I am sick and tired of you manipulating me that way. If you want to go dress shopping you will need to provide an alternative type of transportation," Blair replied with a frown.
"What if I like having you remember the way I pleasured you, the way I made you writhe, moan and beg like a bitch in heat?" Chuck said, his voice as smooth as melted caramel.
Blair shook her head. "No more, Chuck. I won't be your puppet anymore. Either you retire the limo for the time being or I fall back on Nate's offer of a loan."
"Fine," Chuck snarled. "I will have another car brought around. Would you prefer the Rolls or would you like me to drive you myself in the Jag?"
Blair smiled sweetly, her face as innocent as an angel's. "The Rolls will be fine."
It took seconds before Chuck's Rolls Royce was brought around to the front of the hotel.
Seating herself next to Chuck, Blair tried to ignore how close they were. While the limo may have held more memories at least she could sit across from Chuck and keep him at a distance. With the Rolls there wasn't as much room. They were sitting so close she could feel his thigh against hers and she had to clench her fist to keep from reaching out and touching him.
Swallowing her sudden desire back, she looked forcefully out the window at the passing landscape of people.
Dior, Armani, Chanel, and Gucci. They did them all. With Chuck's connections not once did she have to mingle with the general public. Magically whisked away to the private VIP showrooms every time they entered a store she was treated like a queen. Waited on as coordinated outfit after outfit was brought out for her approval. Once the item was tried on there were seamstresses to custom fit each and every piece of clothing. If Blair had thought Chuck would soon tire of this she had been wrong. While he said very little, he sat in the corner, his eyes missing nothing. Every so often he would offer a comment about color, fit or design like an expert. Soon Blair found herself grateful for his thoughts and opinions. He knew what would look good on her before she had even tried it on.
Blair could feel Chuck watching her, his heavy lidded eyes following her as she fluttered around the room in various states of undress. Sensing his desire Blair preened in front of the mirrors, throwing a taunting glance over her shoulder every so often. She knew she was playing with fire, but yet she couldn't seem to stop herself. Wriggling into a slinky, blue velvet dress she posed, peeking over her shoulder at him.
"Does this make me look fat?" she asked petulantly.
Chuck rose, uncomfortably adjusting his trousers over his throbbing hardness. Skimming her hips with his hands he leaned in to whisper along her exposed collarbone, his breath leaving a hot trail up her neck, "Would you like me to prove just how stunning you are by giving the sales girls an x-rated show?"
With a small flirtatious smile she stepped away from him. "Good, then it will be perfect for my date with Nate tonight."
Chuck pulled her flush against him, his fingers bruising her hipbones that protruded ever so slightly from her figure. He held her so tight he could feel the blood running through her veins and the muscular tissue that surrounded her bones. His mouth descended to the curve of her neck, his mouth so tight against her perfumed skin he could taste her.
"Don't play with me, Blair," he rasped against the tender skin of her neck. Blair arched her back in an attempt to escape his attentions, but he wouldn't let her go. She had tempted and teased him enough for one day and now he would teach her that playing with fire only got you burned. His lips slid over the curve of her neck, his teeth scraping over her pulse point. Blair shuddered as her body responded to his closeness, her breath growing shallow and aroused.
"Please Chuck," she whispered. "It isn't me you want, it's Blair."
"Audrey, Blair, I don't care," Chuck replied indifferently, his mouth sucking at the tender skin that teased and tempted him. "You were made for me."
"I can't," Blair said, tears already gathering in the corners of her eyes. "I am not who you think I am."
"You are exactly who I think you are…mine," Chuck countered with a groan as his body fit perfectly against hers.
Blair succumbed to his will for a moment, her lush body melting into his, his hands roving over her curves setting her afire. Wet and turned on beyond expectation it took all of her will to step away from him.
"No," she started, turning to face him. "I won't be your toy, your substitute for her."
Chuck reached out to grip her chin tightly, his eyes catching hers. "You could never be a substitute for her. You are her, my love, my life."
"That is where you are wrong," Blair said sadly. "I am a shell of the women you once loved and the sooner you recognize that the better. I will never be her."
"No, I would love you—"
The young saleslady not yet experienced enough to know when not to interfere with influential clients interrupted, "Mr. Bass, shall we add this dress to your collection of purchases?"
The moment lost, Chuck mentally cursed the saleslady. "We will take it all," he said confidently, yet at the same time expecting Blair to argue. To his surprise she said nothing. Clearly exhausted she dressed once more in her nun like clothes and stood passive as her purchases were boxed and readied for delivery.
The clothes and accessories were added to his account and without delay they left the store for the hotel. Blair was quiet, deep in thought along the way. Chuck tried to engage her in conversation at several times only to receive monosyllables in response. Blair or Audrey had shut down and there would be no more sharing or communication between them for now.
Reaching over he grasped her hand. "Promise me dinner tomorrow. If you can give Nate dinner tonight you owe me nothing less.
Blair turned to look at him, her eyes large and scared. "I owe you nothing."
"Give me dinner at least," Chuck cajoled. "I'm not asking for much."
Tilting her head to the side, she carefully considered his proposal. Perhaps she did owe him. After everything he had done to force the truth on her, set her free, perhaps he did deserve a reward. And as much as she wanted to she couldn't ignore the small secret part of her that wanted nothing more than to spend time with him.
"Tomorrow, at seven. I am yours. But there will be boundaries. No touching, no guilt. We meet openly as the friends we surely were before everything else happened."
Chuck smiled at her craftily. He would show her just exactly how friendly the relationship between Blair and Chuck had been.
"Perfect," he stated with a smirk. "I will arrange for dinner in your suite."
Blair shook her head violently. "No, public places only. I don't trust you to keep your hands off."
"Fine," Chuck sighed. "We will attend the hotel dining room at the Palace. You used to love eating there."
"It's a date then," she uttered before she had a chance to consider her choice of words. "I mean, not a date exactly, but a meal… we are sharing as friends," she continued firmly.
"It's a date," Chuck said with a confident smirk.
Blair only rolled her eyes, exiting the vehicle with haste. Glad to once more be out of the tempting reach of a certain Chuck Bass.
This story now has exactly 100 alerts! :O Thanks so much to everyone who has ever reviewed or alerted this story. I wouldn't be writing this if it weren't for you. :D
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Thanks to Camilla, Chole and Elli for looking this over and giving me their input. If I am forgetting anyone please let me know. This chapter has been floating around for a while. ;)