"You would think that this would have been more difficult," John said as they walked up to the TARDIS. They had simply exited their spacecraft, walked to the top of the hill they crashed into, and spotted the blue police box from the height. Then they walked down to it with no incident other than John stubbing his toe and having a bit of a fit about it.
"Yes, but if you think about it: he really does just leave it lying about." Jack replied, reaching into one of his pockets for the key. Jack put the key in the lock and it clicked open.
"It's bigger on the inside," John said dryly as he observed the gleaming interior of the space ship.
Jack laughed, "It's dimensionally transcendental: the inside occupies a different dimension from the outside or something like that. Now, we just have to figure out how the inside opens."
Opening the panel was a task the pair took to with enthusiasm. They had brought with them a device that a salesmen had guaranteed could open any lock In 60 seconds (which they assumed would work because Jack had a similar looking piece of alien tech at Torchwood Three that could do just that). Half an hour later they had given up on the lock-picker and were standing above the compartment with their handy wrist straps out looking like they were doing absolutely nothing (when in actuality Jack was doing something high tech and complicated while John played a version of Pong and pretended that he was helping). Another hour passed and found John searching through the wardrobe and Jack resolutely fiddling with the ships' own set of controls. Then, suddenly, the door to the TARDIS opened and The Doctor came bounding in.
"Hello there Jack," The Doctor called without looking, "I knew I never should have given you a key. I knew you'd take it as an invitation to enter whenever."
Jack grinned and immediately enveloped the Doctor in a hug, "Yet, for some reason you did. I'd go as far to say that you like having me around."
The Doctor laughed as he hung up his coat, "Things are more interesting when you're around. Now, tell me Jack. What brings you here?"
"I just thought I'd pop in for a chat: I was in this solar region and I saw you fly by."
"Jack have you got the bloody thing open yet?" John called, emerging from lower decks dressed in what seemed to be the scarf that fourth wore, a celery stick favored by Fifth pinned to the coat of clashing colours worn by Sixth, the Panama hat of Seventh, and a cravat probably worn by Third.
"Are you wearing my clothes?" The Doctor sputtered.
"I could strip if you'd like, but then of course it would only be fair if you got naked too. Maybe we could even convince Jack to join in."
The Doctor turned to Jack, "He's you when we first met and honestly I didn't like you when we first met. What is he doing here?"
"I'll have you know I came up with this plan," John sneered.
"He's not staying."
"He's harmless," Jack insisted.
"He has a gun on him. Guns are the opposite of harmless."
"Take the gun away then. You stole mine once and replaced it with a banana once. It will be a simpler task to take it from him."
"He's still not staying."
"He's right here." John whined.
Jack shrugged, "Listen, you haven't got anything to drink have you? I could murder a coffee."
"Actually, I have it on good authority that I recently acquired the best coffee machine in the galaxy. Took quite a bit of tricky time maneuvering to get it, but my new companion insisted."
"New? What happened to Rose and Donna Noble?"
The Doctor's face clouded over, but then he smiled, "They're safe. Rose is back in the other dimension with the human version of me and Donna is home with her family."
"You were left alone?"
"I'm used to it."
Jack groaned loudly, "I can't believe I thought that the last living Time Lord and a man who can't die would be interesting, but it's one pity party after another with you two. You should have left me at Buzz fest. They managed to distill that space cloud made of beer."
The Doctor looked at him curiously, "You're still here then?"
"I'm getting some air," John said with a snort and he stormed out of the TARDIS. A few moments after his dramatic exit a shout of "Bloody hell" echoed from his direction followed by barking.
"Should we go help him?" Jack asked.
The Doctor shrugged, "No, he'll be fine. Just startled I think."
A Golden retriever like-dog bounded through the TARDIS door that John had left cracked open and ran over to sniff Jack curiously. Jack allowed the dog to lick his face as he looked up at the Doctor flabbergasted, "You have a dog?"
"His name is Harry Potter," The Doctor replied cheerfully as the dog made its way over to him. He patted the dog carefully on top of the head, "I was told that getting a dog would be a good idea. He's a special kind we found in the sixtieth century: he has a prolonged lifespan."
Jack smiled at him, "You could use the company."
Now the Doctor broke out into a jovial grin, "Oh, but I have company now. I haven't told you the best bit yet. I have company: Another Time Lord."
"That's impossible."
"That's what I thought, but we thought that once before and The Master got around that. Which got me thinking: What if he wasn't the only one to use a Fob watch to escape the Time War. There could be any number of Time Lords existing as humans throughout time and space. So, when Donna left I began rewriting the TARDIS's tracking system. I still had my Fob watch so it was only a matter of time before I was able to find a tangible base particle for the TARDIS to track."
"Still, the sheer impossibility of the probability of being able to find another Time Lord through all time…" Jack trailed off.
"Yes!" The Doctor shouted excitedly, "If I had any other ship, but the TARDIS chances are I would never have been able to find him, but the TARDIS is connected with my people telepathically and emotionally. It wants to find other Time Lords. So when I set it to that task it automatically expanded the search to include time."
"That's oddly useful: Unless you're running away from a crazy ex girlfriend who has a TARDIS."
"You'd know about running away wouldn't you Jack?" The Doctor said quietly.
Jack's head shot up, "What did you just say?"
"I was there Jack."
"Why didn't you help me? I needed you," Jacks voice cracked helplessly.
"I landed at the end. Just before you destroyed the 456 and you know the event is time locked once the TARDIS lands."
Jack froze, "That week is time locked?"
The Doctor nodded, "Yup, moment the TARDIS lands I become a part of events."
Jack collapsed against the railing of the ship and accidentally onto the tail of Harry Potter who barked anxiously before retreating to his dog bed in the corner, "So I can't go back and save them?"
The Doctor raised an eyebrow at Jack, "I wouldn't have let you go back and change events any way Jack. Did you learn nothing from your time as a Time Agent? Or from Satellite Five? Or from an episode of Star Trek?"
"What's the point of being able to travel through time if you can't change anything? What's the use of it if you can't even use it to save the ones you love?"
The Doctor opened his mouth to answer but was cut off by the re-entrance of John. He slammed the door open with a large 'crack' and began slinging off his jacket, "Bloody hell Jack, you're not going to believe this."
"Coat," The Doctor said warningly, nodding at the coat rack by the door. John shot him an incredulous look, but The Doctor insisted, "Trust me. Hang the coat up."
John rolled his eyes and dropped the coat in a pile on the floor, "Oops."
"It's your funeral," The Doctor shrugged, "Is he coming in?"
"I don't even know how he's there. Why the fuck would I know if he plans on coming in?"
"Oi! Part-Time Shag! Come in." The Doctor called.
An irritated familiar voice floated in from outside, "I told you not to call me that. It was a joke. I'll be right there: this planet got dirt all over the TARDIS and it's taking awhile to clean off."
The Doctor turned to Jack, ignoring his gob smacked expression, and explained, "He's having some trouble picking a Time Lord name."
"I don't know why I need a Time Lord name," the voice stated as it entered, "I've had the same name all my life so why can't I just keep that. I like being –"
"Ianto Jones," Jack interrupted, albeit a bit breathlessly.
"Hello Jack," The aforementioned Ianto Jones said simply, one side of his mouth quirked up, after staring at Jack for a moment he turned abruptly away and left the room quickly muttering, "I'll put some coffee on."