Well here is the next chapter...Sorry it has taken so long for it to load. It's been a long couple of weeks, homework, I had Auditions and practices for my high school's next theatre production: Beauty and the Beast!!! So that is exciting, but it is taking up a lot of time. However, I am still writing the next chapter so mabye I will have it up next week. It just depends.

Again thanks for reading this fic. It makes me happy to get the reviews,

Thanks to the reviewers who kindly gave their thoughts: Alive At Last, Cammy98, xlovekillsxmanyx, whatcoloristhesky, and debster35 also, the past reviewers as well.

Thanks to Alive At Last, and Cathy for helping me pull together this chapter and make pretty

Disclamer: I do not own The Outsiders, nor will I ever. I also do not own the song "Someday" by Nickelback (Wish I did) However I do own Natalie and all the characters and events (Danny, Calab, Wes, Blade etc.) and many more that my heart can make up.

Warning: Cursing

Enjoy!!

PS. Please Review!!

Chapter 6: Ghost of the Past

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it all right but not right now

I know you're wondering when

(You're the only one who knows that)

Someday, somehow

I'm gonna make it all right but not right now

I know you're wondering when

Nickelback

I didn't have any destination in mind when I started walking. I just wanted to get away from everything. The looks on their faces stated that I was a foreigner to them, that I was a stranger impersonating Natalie. I felt like I was a zombie to them, just pretending to be something I wasn't. Their curiosity was my biggest enemy. They wanted to know everything, or they wanted to return to a somewhat normal time, back where those ten months didn't exist and it was just as a void.

It's not that easy to erase ten months of a person's life away and act like it never happened. I would not want to forget those past ten months, except perhaps the bad, but still that was what helped me grow. I learned more about myself than ever before. I learned new tricks and ways to handle myself in the real world. Sometimes, you don't know much about yourself, until something knocks you down.

I didn't realize I was walking toward the local cemetery untill I saw the rusty entrance. I went straight past the gravestones where there were flowers adorning them. Steadily, I went to the very end of the rows or gravestones, which were always bare. I counted the rows till I found the right gravestone. It was Caleb's gravestone.

There wasn't much on the stone; just his name, date of birth, death and a few words of comfort were written. "A great friend, a brother who got taken away from us too soon." Around the stone was bare, no flowers or items of endearment. It looked like no one had been around for a while. However, that was not the case. People who knew did care and came out to see the place he was buried, but they just did not want to show it.

I still remember the funeral and the moments after he was shot, just like a movie playing over and over again in my mind.

Just like it was yesterday.

"Caleb, please don't die, please" I begged fruitlessly. "You can't die, you just can't. You said that you would never leave me. That I would have to beat you with a stick to get you away."

I felt something burning my face, realizing my own tears were causing this pain. But it was nothing compared to the intense pain in my heart. I had heard people running away saying "Let's get out of here." But, I stayed where I was; I wasn't going to leave him. Not yet. Somehow I knew he was dead, I just didn't want to admit it. Not yet.

"It should a been me, I should had been shot, not you. I should have ducked or ran or done something for Chirst sakes. I am so sorry." I cried out in pain.

It was not fair; he was just a kid. He was a good person; not a saint, but still good. He was reliable in a fight. He stuck up for his friends in a fight. It was just not fair.

In the distance I head a faint "Natalie" and several people running toward me. I looked up to see Danny, Blade, Wes and Charlie rush toward me. They stopped once they were close enough to see the damage that was done. I felt them surround me as they looked on my fruitless attempts to save him.

"What are you guys doing? Help me, help me save him. God damn it, help me save him!" I screamed at my friends, but they just stood there watching me. They could have helped me save him.

"Natalie we-" Danny started.

"Don't you dare say we can't. He has done so much for us. He has bailed all of us out of a jail cell at one time or another. He has stand by us when things were against us. So don't you dare tell me we can't save him," I hissed, venom scathing my voice, ready to attack anyone who tried to stop me.

I felt a strong pair of hands grab my shoulders and pull me back slowly away from Caleb. My hands tried to hold on to Caleb as I was being shoved away from him.

"No, don't you dare touch me, don't you dare-" I fought tiredlessly against the hands that turned out to be Danny's. A surge of adrenaline rushed through me as I fought against his hands.

"Come on Natalie; just let it go. Come on Shadow... just turn around." Danny soothed slowly to me.

I started to kick and hit, not affecting him much. He grew tired of the struggle and picked me up bridal style. I had stopped yelling and was struggling not to cry. However, I was failing miserably. I noticed that Danny was lowering me down to the ground. He was still holding on to me, not to tight but enough to comfort me.

"Shh….it's ok baby, let it out….They ain't gonna hurt you no more," Danny comforted me softly.

I was sobbing now quietly, grieving my loss of a friend. I tried to lift my head over his shoulder to see Caleb one last time. However, Danny noticed what I was trying to do and stopped me immediately.

"Don't look Shadow. Just don't look-"

"It shoulda been me….I should have died. He was trying to protect me, I didn't react fast enough…" I started to blubber to Danny.

"Hey, it's not your fault... Everything is gonna be fine; we will get through this." Danny proceeded to rub my back and whisper comforting things to me into the night.

I don't remember much after that. I don't really remember Danny carrying me back to his house to clean up my wounds. I don't remember Cara or the girls helping the boys snap me out of my phase. I was just lost.

I told myself that it was my fault. That if I had reacted fast enough, he would have survived. He would have experienced more of life and he would have grown up and maybe got out of this town. He would have helped with rumbles, birthdays, and other events that you would spend with friends. But he can't. The gang reassured me and tried to change my views on how I thought.

The one time that it got out of hand was after the funeral. It was the biggest argument between me and Danny ever.

It was noon and everyone had either left or faded away, and I didn't notice. They left after they laid Caleb to rest, and I was still there, paying a penance for something I only know of. It was a slightly windy day. There was a slightly breeze, and the sun was shinning bright overhead. I had heard someone stop beside me, becoming as silent as I was. However, I didn't bother to look at who it was besides me. I knew it was Danny, who was more persisted then the others.

Neither of us said a thing. The only sound was the sound of birds chirping and the wind wrestling with the leaves, making their own wind chime. Finally, he broke the silence.

"I can't stand this, you are blaming yourself for something you had no say in-…" Danny started, the momentum building up in his voice.

"Yes I did," I interrupted. "I could have done something, I could have fought harder, or try to avoid the bullet. In the end it was my fault. If I had done something he would still be alive." I yelled at Danny, tired of having this conversation over and over again.

"If Caleb could…" Danny started to say, but I cut him off.

"Shut up, just shut up. Don't you dare bring that into this," I shouted. We were both surprised of the outburst that came out of my mouth. I had never yelled at Danny. He was one of my closest friends.

"Look, you know as well as I do that if Caleb was standing here looking at you and the mess that you have cause for yourself, he would have a fit. He would tell you he knows that it was not your fault, that you did all that you can do, and that you should let it go and not blame yourself. Seeing you like this... it's killing me because I don't know what to do to make it better. I want to help you, hold you, and comfort you. But you have to admit that it was not your fault in the first place. Then can you really heal." Danny admitted softly.

It was silent after that. Neither one of us had anything to say. How could we? We both lost the same friend. We both were hurting. I soon noticed that he was walking away from me.

Once I was all alone, I started talking to the grave.

"Caleb... Oh God, I am so sorry."

I slowly sank to the ground, sobs erupting from me. But this time no one was there to catch me.

I looked over to the grave, remembering everything that had happened to me and my friends. I still looked on and felt that it was my fault. That it should have been me in that casket and not him.

"Well, I'm back; I know we haven't talked in a while. Things have been hectic. I am back with my brothers, but I haven't told them anything that happened to me yet. I don't think I will ever be able to tell them about you, the girls and the gang to them. They wouldn't understand. I had a nightmare last night; it was about the incident. It freaked my brothers out a lot. They are now asking questions, wondering what happened those ten months. Anyway, I don't know what to do. Should I tell them? Maybe they will understand everything. Maybe. Or will they look at me with disgust of what happened and never trust me again. I don't know Caleb… I am just lost. I wish you were here, you could give me advice on what to do. Hell, I'm always lost… but you guys were always there to guide me through at times. Always there."

I felt some rustle in the wind and the sound of someone walking slowly. I didn't know who it was and I was starting to get tense. I reached down into my pocket to grab hold of my switchblade. I opened it up, ready to use it to defend myself enough, to run at the chance.

Then they spoke.

"Well, well, well... Look at what we have here. You know they say talking to the dead isn't the smartest thing to do. Well, in this neighbrood anyway."

I turned fast, finding myself staring into the face of the man, and clenched my jaw tight.

Well..how about that for a cliffhanger. So who do you think our mystery guy is??

Even though I know who he is I want to know who you think he is.

Is it...a Soc, greasers, one of her brother's friends, or an old friend?? Try and guess.

Anyway, thanks for reading, please review it. Your reviews help me write more chapters. :)