Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters nor do I own the song...I only wish I did

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Numb

I'm tired of being what you want me to be
feeling so faithless
lost under the surface
I don't know what you're expecting of me
put under the pressure
of walking in your shoes
caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
every step that I take is another mistake to you

Ginny, Molly and Hermione sat at the kitchen table. Hermione was holding a fresh cup of coffee, her eyes were puffy and red. Suddenly Mrs Weasley spoke "Ginerva Molly Weasley, how could you do such a thing?" Ginny shook her head. Words simply would not come to her. She had never thought it would come to this. Not after all her careful planning. Tears filled in her eyes. She wanted desperatley to speak, to defend herself, but the words would not come to her. Her throat felt thick, restricted. Hermione began sobbing gently.

I've become so numb
I can't feel you there
become so tired
so much more aware
I'm becoming this
all I want to do
Is be more like me
and be less like you

"Ginerva i think you may need help to deal with this, considering you were about to take ten sleeping pills with coffee" Mrs Weasley said. Ginny realised they must be thinking that she was going to take the pills, not give them to Hermione to take. Ginny opened her mouth to protest, then stopped short. She knew that it would sound even worse if she said she was going to give them to Hermione to take. They would surely think there was something seriously wrong and she would be forced to confess the secret she'd kept since she was twelve.

Can't you see that you're smothering me
holding too tightly
afraid to lose control
cause everything that you thought i would be
has fallen apart right in front of you

"Ginerva, look at me" said Molly. Ginny hestitated, then looked up into her mother's golden caramel eyes and saw disappointment. Tears threatened to fall as emotions coarsed through Ginny's body, stronger then ever before. She had always strived to live up to her mother's expectations of her. But now seeing this disappointment she had cause her mother made her realise that no matter how hard she strived she could not turn off her feelings, and that was what had disappointed her mother the most. The tears were welling up in her eyes now, blurring her vision.

Caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
every step that i take is another mistake to you
caught in the undertow, just caught in the undertow
and every second i waste is more than i can take

Hermione looked up and opened her motuh, then closed it. She seemed to be at a loss of what to say to her best friend and ex-girlfriend. Molly suddenly spoke again "What was going through your head when you decided to take these pills?" Ginny felt a sudden anger build up inside her. Her mother didn't understand that when you are a lesbian you don't need some big thing to push you over the edge, as Ginny had discovered… You get the message every day in your life, that you just don't fit in with the world. You get it driven through your skull. Sooner or later you get the message. You get the point.

But I know
I may end up failing too
but I know
you were just like me
with someone disappointed in you

She was about to say all this when Molly spoke one final time " I think you may need some mental help Ginerva" The anger inside Ginny burst out in a flood of rage "you think i'm crazy just because i'm a lesbian?" She said, outraged. Those words felt so good to say. Relief at finally stating this outloud was amazing and normally Ginny would have been happy that she had finally told her parents, but for now she had more pressing things to worry about. Her mother reached forward to touch her arm but Ginny pulled away and stood up, fierce and tall.

I've become so numb
I can't feel you there
become so tired
so much more aware
I'm becoming this
all I want to do
Is be more like me
and be less like you

She pondered saying a few things, but didn't. Instead she took one last glance at Hermione and fled. She ran out of the house, despite her mother calling out after her to come back and discuss this rationally. She ran and ran until she reached the other side of the town, where there was a small cave up on a hillside. Her lungs were bursting, her legs were trembling, she had a stitch in her side but she kept running until she reached the back wall of the cave. She had no food, no money and no clothes. But she had shelter. And for now she knew she was safe. At least for now.

I've become so numb
I can't feel you there
become so tired
so much more aware
I'm becoming this
all I want to do
Is be more like me
and be less like you

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