Chapter 3: Of sanwiches, insurance, and asham.
Pete: Which way to Casphian?
Dumpkin smiles, and the music tensions.
Dumpkin: I know a way to a crossing near Beruna.
Pete: Then we're going the other way.
Dumpkin: Why is that?!
Pete: Because I'm smarter then everybody here.
Lucky: -whisper- He's talking to the gnats.
Pete: And off we go, ho!
Lucky: The road goes ever on and on... Oh look, Asham!
Pete: Don't be silly, Lu. There's no such thing as lions.
Lucky: Right over there! -falls into a hole-
Pete: Are you OK?!!!
Lucky: I'm sorta angering my insurance agent... all these mad stunts... my premium rates will go up...
Edmuncher: She's ok.
Lucky: I see a way down!
Dumpkin: Maybe you're worth something after all!
Lucky: I never thought you cared!!!
---the Pevensies are now down, and very close to Casphian's camp.---
Susin: Why do you think I didn't see Asham?
Lucky: Because you don't understand how to manage your finances.
Susin: You need to find a way out of this obsession for money... it's blinding you from being happy in life.
Lucky: Sometimes... I think I'm doing the right thing... then I see I'm not... so I count money and it makes me feel better.
Susin: It is SO HARD to have a decent, touching conversation with you.
Lucky: :-(
Susin: You need to take a look at what's really important.
Lucky: G'night.
Susin: G'night.
Lucky: -thinks of counting sheep.. counts pots of gold at the end of the rainbow guarded by a leprechaun that lets Lucky take as much money as she wants-
Lucky gets up. She walks around, stumbles a bit, and sees footprints.
A person that big must need a rather large travel agent bill, right?
She sees Asham, and all she previously thought disappeared.
Asham: Rise, Daughter of Eve. I have returned.
Lucky: Why haven't you come to save Narnia from the pirates?
Asham: Things never happen the same way twice, dear one.
Lucky: Narnia's never been invaded by pirates before.
Asham: You're missing the point.
Lucky: But if you only come when things are different, then how come you haven't saved Narnia?
Asham: I just explained, * hits head * Gosh. I can only save Narnia SO many times...
Lucky: how come... how come you made me the rich, popular queen of Narnia only to make me return home to my old life? I was finally making some profit...
Asham: You need to examine yourself. Not your pocketbook.
Lucky: Pocketbook(S) I have more than one pocketbook. I have, like, a ton---
Asham: Please, think about helping other people.
Lucky: I will... as soon as I retire...
*twig breaks *
Lucky: Ah! Wonder what that was..
'
Lucky looks around, wondering what it was.
Lucky: Its a beaver! No.... Its ASHAM!!!
Pete: SSHHH!!!
Lucky: What?
Pete: Its a minotaurus!
Lucky: I wonder if he has flood insurance!
Pete: LU....
Lucky: Right. I must control myself... share... maybe he needs boat insurance instead...
Pete: I'm pretty sure he's ok. Let's charge!
---==++CHARGE++==---
Casphian: Go away!
HYAW!
Fight ensues.
Casphian: Here's a rock for ya!
-throws boulder-
Pete: OUCCCH....
Lucky: I'M A HERO!!!
Casphian and Pete stare...
Lucky: Do you guys need life insurance? Sure looks like it! Subscribe now to take advantage of our extremely low rates!
Casphian: yOu.. YoU...You're the kings and queens of old!
Lucky: Yo.
Susin: Pete!
Reepicheeper: Meep! Meep, meep meep meep MEEP!
Doveyhunter: Hallelujah! You've finally arrived.
Susin: Why are you all staring at me?
Doveyhunter: I wasn't even looking at you.
Susin: That was a joke.
Pete: We're here to save Narnia!
Casphian: You're kids... younger than me...! Haha!
Pete: Can you fight?
Casphian: It hurts my complexion and Risks messing up my hair... I can scratch, bite, and STARE.
-Casphian stares-
Susin: -stares back-
Casphian: You... you're beautiful. WAS THAT OUT LOUD?!
Pete: Ermmmmmm
Edmuncher: Giggle Giggle!
Lucky: Hey. Name's lucky. THE Lucky. I win ever spin and win wheel, lottery, and investment I enter.
Casphian: What, is the kid serious? Haha!
Lucky: You better watch it.
Dumpkin: So much for congratulating me escaping certain death for you, Casphian.
Casphian: C. created you for MINOR role. You're only a so-so big deal.
Dumpkin: -glare-
Casphian: I need your help defeating the evil which has enslaved my country.
Pete: OHMYGOSH! Nancy Pelosi has infested NARNIA too?! NOO!!!
Casphian: Not exactly... Well, that too...
Pete: I hope you guys serve toast. Edmuncher needs.
Edmuncher: -Starts crying-
Casphian: This story just keep getting weirder and weirder...
Lucky: I once insured a peanut butter and jelly sandwich before I ate him...
Casphian: O.o
Lucky: Ed is his own science experiment! Look at all those teeth!
Edmuncher: -cries in pride-