The Introduction:
Q: Who are you and why are you doing this?

A: We could pretend that I'm just bored, but let's be more creative. Let's say I am a raving lunatic with a god-complex and otherwise I would be classified as a schizophrenic, psychotic sociopath. This is a safer outlet. I mean… unless you want me to eat your dog and frighten your grandma. ;)

The disclaimer: If Rumiko Takahashi left me Inuyasha in her will, I would bequeath it to the first person who would be willing to swallow an African Cave Dwelling Spider. Watching you squirm is worth more than a diluted plotline ever will be.

When last we left our would-be heroes they were battling their raging personality defects. Or a fire-breathing demon. You know, whatever floats your boat. Now they have returned to replaying flashbacks for the 456th time. Twenty-three more seconds have been wasted, a new record. Animators rejoice.

The collective group decides to make themselves useful by

a) fighting the big dangerous demons and getting another of the millions of jewel shards out there.
b) saving the villagers without getting a jewel shard, inevitably leading to an Inuyasha-Kagome confrontation then an uncomfortable make-up.
c) knitting warm winter sweaters for the homeless.

Seeing as Inuyasha is both creatively-challenged and selfish, the group decides on option a. The homeless go cold. In the following scenes there will undoubtedly be a destroyed village, at least five references to Naraku and another unnecessary flashback because we all remember all of them (refer to cremated Kikyo / dark Naraku picture / something that happened two minutes ago). Animators rejoice.

The demon they should have started fighting before the village was decimated appears. "Fightin' words" are exchanged and for four and a half more minutes Inuyasha and his ridiculously huge sword (keep telling yourself he's not compensating for anything) stare down the competition. Commercial break! Animators… rejoice.

Dramatic overview of scene… and… we're back! Inuyasha attacks with a badly-dubbed assault and stuff… happens. Above all, it is violent. Yay, violence!

As soon as Inuyasha realizes what he was supposed to learn this episode, the monster bastard is destroyed way too easily. No one really cares. Most of the people who would are dead. Kagome further debases the female gender by falling all over herself, skipping over the corpses that could have been spared if only they were there a moment earlier and running to play nurse to Inuyasha's homicidal maniac. Apparently, there was no jewel shard. It was really (insert your own lame explanation here). That would have advanced the plot. God forbid. We need ten thousand chapters (slash episodes).

Kagome is forgotten when Inuyasha has a vague and fleeting feeling that Kikyo the zombie corpse who we've been waiting to die for five hundred chapters is close by. Animators realize that not enough time has been wasted. We must watch an uncomfortable succession of scenes in which Inuyasha and Kikyo exchange a series of touchy and otherwise feely contacts. Heartfelt but (as we all know) utterly meaningless words are exchanged as someone tries to convince us that Inuyasha's really more than a killing machine. Those who fall for the ploy find the whole necromancer thing romantic.

The rest of us shudder, but being loyal fans refuse to acknowledge this underlying necromancy. Less loyal fans have changed the channel. Or are vomiting.

Inevitably, Kagome will find out about this meeting and turn it into a martyrdom which she will use later to illustrate why Inuyasha should be mercilessly beaten into the ground. Apparently, violence plus more violence makes things better. This may also go into her vindicating arsenal which will eventually be used as the next atomic bomb, releasing a vaporizing wave of self-righteous fury upon the land.

Many will perish. Animators will be instantly annihilated.

Next Episode: Hey, this rocks! Let's make a movie about it!

Those with no sense of humor are in the corner muttering about how they will destroy me with their half-demon powers. Flames will be used in weenie-roasting as I laugh over your sensitivity. I am so facetious.

Those with a sense of humor are invited to share in the weenies or a cookie direct from me, home-baked with love. More is coming. BEWARE!