The Introduction:

Welcome to a chapter as useless as the episodes it has been based on.

Wow. I love the reviews on this. Very… original. It's always a good thing when reviews make me laugh. It's nice to know that your audience has a good sense of humor when you're trying to write something funny. It makes things much easier.
Henceforth, I let the evil speak for itself.

The disclaimer: Inuyasha will never be mine. I mean really, who wants to watch Kagome get a backbone or the story actually progress? Rumiko Takahashi tricks the ignorant so well.

It's been too long. Therefore we must have more back story. It will reveal nothing new, but the animators all got drunk and forgot to draw for this week so- flashbacks!

We see the usual suspects set to new music. Or not. I'm not even going into detail here because the thought makes me depressed. You have them all memorized, right? I thought so.

So anyway, this wastes one episode and is often called a recap. As in, if I have to watch the same thing again, I'm gonna pop a recap in somebody's ass. Animators hide their asses. This bores all involved. Sometimes, we walk away. Inuyasha injects more opium into our brains. We change the channel back, hoping that something interesting will come along. No luck.

Next Episode: … wait a minute. Even I can't justify that as an episode.

Okay. So Naraku spends this episode crawling through the shadows discussing his evil master plan. No doubt Kagura will watch Naraku crawl through the shadows as she hides in the other shadows discussing her evil master plan. Kikyo may also be hiding… you get the point. Kanna crosses her fingers that someone will soon end her meaningless existence. She's always wanted to be a public speaker anyway. You couldn't tell?

It's been a few minutes since we saw Sesshoumaru doing something meaningless, right?

…

And then Sesshoumaru's all like 'I reproduce asexually- uncomfortable sexual tension.' And there is much uncomfortable sexual tension. Bam! Another episode. Hell Yeah!

Next Episode: Wait. What?… You want more? Sheesh…

It's about time for Naraku to spit out another chunk of quivering, evil flesh. Gross. Some of us suggest he get a girlfriend. Most realize that Naraku must have been quite unloved as a child… or as a quivering, evil chunk of his father's flesh. Some of us hurl. For a most of us, the throw up does not becomes a living breathing child who does our bidding. Thank God.

Repeat chapters one and two as necessary.

Once the monster has been defeated (or is serving his probation hours contributing to his community), we get to see Naraku again. He's probably bitching and moaning about how nobody loves him. Even the cast of Rent wouldn't go to a Life Support meeting with this guy. So, he sends more monsters to do his roundabout bidding. God knows there's some evil plan at the bottom of this. It probably won't matter in the end, anyway. It's not like anything will actually change. Oh! Anticlimactic!

…

At last, we return to the poor excuses for lead characters as they… who knows? Maybe walk across a decrepit bridge or walk along a road at night or walk through a forest. One way or another, the only way the story moves is if somebody turns up dead, preferably an innocent villager. Usually, the one who lost rock-paper-scissors.

So anyway, some mutilated corpse shows up. WAIT! When's the last time Inuyasha got a bitchin' new sword? Way too long ago, if you ask the testosterone-loaded muscle heads who actually watch this show. So, recap. Corpse, new sword. Kagome somehow manages to convince Inuyasha to go help the village that currently has a target on it. Why? Who knows? A billion demons probably sensed a jewel shard (You know, the one our lovely group has) and decided to… well, annihilate the village. Why? Who cares? Demons are stupid. Live with it.

So the big-ass-est demon shows up, spouts a load of garbage about being power hungry and… whatever, chucks around some horses or chickens to prove a point. These horses and chickens didn't even get a chance to play rock-paper-scissors because horses always have rock and chickens always have scary claws. So they just pick the stupid one that blew all its money on slot machines. Last week it was Seabiscuit.

Inuyasha uses his ahem impressive array of swords to defeat the demon. Don't try this at home kids. Unless you have a crazy mystical sword with awesome powers. If you do have said mystical weapon, leave me your name, address, phone number, where you hide your key and when you will be out of your house next weekend. Here is the general outline:

Step 1. Remove rusty sword. Swing around a bit until it turns into something that looks like a bunny impaled on a gigantic hunk of metal. Ooh! Fun!
Step 2. Swing this sword around a little more. Use some ineffective attacks such as Kaze no Kizu (which looks impressive but does nothing) or Bakuryuha (which has many lame excuses as to why it isn't working right Cite: "Oh, my magical powers are on the fritz. Can someone adjust my antennae? Lower. Lower.")
Step 3. Get frustrated. Maybe curse a little.
Step 4. Change sword form again. Red would go nicely with that kimono, no?
Step 5. Realize that there was no barrier, so that red piece of crap was totally useless. Or Naraku/villain of the week has "evolved" beyond what your crappy sword is capable of. Change sword into sparkly diamondy thing. Laugh triumphantly as you pretend that you conquered the enemy. Look really stupid when demon emerges completely unharmed.
Step 6. Get smacked around a little. We wouldn't want this demon to look like a wuss. Hell no, not when his girlfriend will be watching this episode.
Step 7. Whip out some miracle cure and through the power of friendship or some other bullshit, defeat the demon. Watch in self-righteous pride as slowly-dying friend kills himself a little more by sucking in the demon bastard.
Step 8. Name new sword something wicked cool even though all it does is turn rocks into marshmallow peeps.
Step 9. Walk off triumphantly into the sunset.

Oh! Treat for you: A new ending song has been used to convince you that Inuyasha is fresh and original. -Snort- Oh, did I do that out loud?

Is it working?

Next Episode: Harry Potter and the aging nympho werewolf vampire…

Those with no sense of humor are contemplating a homicide using the samurai swords they swear they know how to use. They forget that three episodes of Ruroni Kenshin do not actually qualify as training. Flames will be used as fodder for later pointing and laughing.

Those with a sense of humor are invited to laugh as those without swing around shiny metal objects and try not to take out their own eyes. More is coming. BEWARE!