The following morning Minerva was not at breakfast in the Great Hall. Xander and the kids went back to their apartment to get ready for Xander's first foray into this new world. Fairly soon a knock on the door was heard.
"Wondered where you vanished to!" Xander said as he opened the door for Minerva and another young lady to enter. The said young lady had bright pink hair and a distinct grunge look.
"Good morning Xander, this is Nymphadora Tonks. A former student." The young lady seemed to glare at Minerva.
It's just Tonks." She muttered.
"Really? Why not Nym? Or Dora?" Xander asked.
"Because it means I always have to give my whole name at some point." She growled.
"Yeah, but you'll have to do that anyway… unless lots of people only have one name in this world." He considered.
"No." She sighed. "I suppose Nym is more feminine."
"Right, Nym it is," Xander said happily. "So… why are you here?" He asked.
"I take it tact is not something they covered in your reality!" Minerva declared with a scowl.
"It was… it kinda went out the window in favour of 'Information saves lives'."
"Were you an Auror?" The newly christened 'Nym' asked.
"A what now?"
"It's what the magical world calls their police," Hermione explained.
"Ah… and no, I was very much not a cop," Xander said with a bit of relief.
"A criminal?" Nym asked hesitantly, she hoped her favourite professor wasn't asking her to ignore her newly taken vows as an officer of the law.
"Nah, I was… complicated. I dealt with things the proper authorities couldn't… kinda like an undercover soldier." Xander explained.
"I'm sure this will be an interesting story… one that you can share when you return," Minerva interjected. "Miss Tonks was raised in both the muggle and magical world. She will make a much better guide than I could. She is also a trainee Auror. This is a better arrangement as I need to be here to oversee the Hogsmede trips."
"Sure… Hogsmeade, Hogwarts… you must love your pork." Xander shrugged cheekily.
Minerva was spared from responding when Joyce appeared behind Tonks and tapped her shoulder causing the new Auror recruit to spin around.
"AUNTY JOYCE!" She squealed happily as she pounced on the new arrival.
"Hi, Nymphy," Joyce said as she struggled to breathe through the crushing hug.
The other four looked on with slight amusement as Tonks' hair cycled through various colours.
"And how exactly do you know Mrs Summers?" Minerva asked.
"She helped me train my metamorphmagus abilities whilst I was a student… but it was a secret."
"Meta-morpha-whatta-gus?" Xander asked.
"Err… the stuff that lets me change how I look." She said thinking of how to explain it.
"Huh… so you're a shapeshifter," Xander said causing Hermione and giggle and Joyce to roll her eyes. "And I'm guessing you think Harry is one?" He asked turning to Minerva.
"Very good, Xander," Minerva smirked teasingly. "Speaking of which, Nym, that sounds so much better, I'd like you to meet Hermione Granger and Harry Potter."
"Harry Potter? Little Harry!" She squealed as Harry stiffened as he was engulfed in a hug similar to the one Joyce received.
"Nym, he's not used to hugs yet," Xander warned as he noticed Harry's reaction.
"Oh… that makes a change. He used to love hugs from everyone… have you told Bill?" She asked excitedly.
"Oh, dear… I will do that today as soon as you leave." Minerva said guiltily.
"Ok, and Bill would be?" Xander asked as he tried not to laugh at Hermione's head swinging back and forth as if she was trying to watch a tennis match.
"William Weasley is Ron Weasley's oldest brother. He along with Tonks spent a lot of time babysitting Harry and Neville whilst their parents were engaged in activities during the war. Bill was very fond of the both of you." She told Harry.
"You were our baby brothers… we made ourselves a new family name… we called ourselves the 'Wee-Tonk-Potter-Bottoms'." Tonks grinned causing the others to snicker. "You vanished after your parents were killed and Neville's Gran kept him in hiding. Bill was the most devastated, he joined Gringotts to try and track you down."
"I know I'm gonna be doing this a lot, but-"
"Gringotts is the wizarding bank," Hermione answered seeing where he was headed.
"Tonks will be taking you there so the goblins know you and you can have access to my accounts," Joyce added.
"Your accounts?" Tonks asked. "I thought you were stuck here?"
"I am, these accounts were set up before the school was built. It's where all the student fees and donations go."
"But we need that money to fund the school!" Minerva sputtered as Hermione nodded vigorously, she had no desire to see her school fail… she still hadn't finished reading the accessible books in the library yet… for the second time… this month.
"Oh relax Hermione," Joyce said as she ushered them all to sit down for a bit. "There are practically millions of galleons in the account. Xander and I own the school and the only things that are bought regularly are food and potion ingredients. When was the last time the school brooms were replaced?" She asked Minerva pointedly.
Minerva blushed in realisation.
"Exactly." Joyce continued. "Nymphy, whilst you're out there take them to start ordering some new stuff for the school. Harry and Hermione will be able to help as well."
"I did it!" Harry suddenly squealed happily.
Everyone turned to see that Harry's hair now resembled Cousin It… except it was bright pink.
"Pretty good kid! Took me ages to do it on purpose." Nym grinned as Xander patted his back gently, but Harry still flinched causing everyone to frown at the implications.
Harry's hair suddenly started to shorten and return to normal.
"Oh… it didn't last long." He said somewhat disappointedly.
"And that's where Nym and practice come in," Joyce told him.
"Right, sounds like we have a lot to do today so we should get started," Xander said as he stood up and stretched.
"You can leave from the floo in the headmaster's office, Nym, make sure he goes to Ollivanders. He needs a wand." Joyce instructed as they headed for the door.
"Floo? I'm guessing that isn't going to involve mucus? More to the point I am praying it doesn't involve mucus." Xander corrected.
"It's a method of magical transportation involving stepping in and out of a fireplace," Minerva explained, Hermione pouted that she had been denied the chance to explain causing Joyce to giggle and squeeze her.
"Oh… so named in connection to a chimney flue?" Xander asked.
"OF COURSE!" Hermione suddenly shouted in realisation.
She blushed when everyone suddenly stared at her grinning, Harry was peeking out from behind Xander having been startled by the loud shouting. He was having a hard time the past few days. He had never been the centre of attention; he had survived the Dursleys by being unnoticed. It rarely worked… but it was better than the alternative. He was now having trouble accepting that these people weren't like the Dursleys and weren't going to hurt him.
Harry felt a large hand on his back and tensed. He looked up to see Xander staring down at him with a sad smile. Harry tried to force himself to relax.
"Better," Xander said as he slowly rubbed Harry's back.
The group continued to the headmaster's office. Tonks was the first to go through, throwing down the powder and calling out her destination of "Diagon Alley," Hermione followed nervously but successfully.
"Go on Harry, I'll be last and right behind you," Xander assured him.
Harry stepped into the fireplace and blurted out, "Diagonally!"
And vanished.
"Ok… that was wrong… right?" Xander asked worriedly.
Both Minerva and Joyce nodded furiously.
"Shit!" Xander jumped into the fireplace and repeated what Harry had done. He hadn't been on the job a week and he had already lost his charge.
Harry was very worried when he tumbled out into the dark room and couldn't see Nym or Hermione… he couldn't see much of anything as his glasses had fallen off. Seconds later he was relieved to hear Xander calling his name.
"Harry, even I know that enunciation is important in spellwork." Xander admonished as he picked Harry off the floor. "Where are your glasses?"
"They fell off," Harry said glumly.
Xander looked around, but all he could see were various cabinets and displays, he came to the conclusion he was in a shop.
"Alright, no big deal, we'll just have to make our first stop at an optician's and hope Nym can front us some cash. Stay where you are, I'm gonna see if I can find some more of that powder, we'll try and do this the right way." Xander instructed.
Xander was opening various pots and containers when he accidentally brushed against a gnarled and severed hand, which promptly grabbed his wrist.
"MOTHER FU- I mean… erm… bloody hell?" He said sheepishly as he remembered Harry. "All right you piece of… something… don't make me cut you o- erm… please let go?" He tried as he struggled to remove his hand.
Unfortunately, he tugged too hard and the hand came free from its base, which went sailing through the air and landed with a loud crash as it passed through several glass displays.
"Oi! What's going on in here? We're closed." A grumpy-looking man with really bad hair called out as he stormed in from a backroom.
"Little help here!" Xander called out as he lifted his hand to show the man his problem.
The man stalked over waving his wand and causing the displays to repair themselves.
"Why would you put your hand in the Hand of Glory?" He asked incredulously as he squeezed the base of the thumb causing it to release Xander.
"I didn't! It grabbed me when I was looking for floo powder. We kinda said the wrong place when we were headed for Diagon Ally." Xander said defensively.
"Ah… you said 'Diagonally' didn't cha'." The man chuckled.
"Yes sir," Harry said hanging his head.
"Well, happens often enough, but the ministry won't fix it. You are in Knockturn Ally, in my store Borgin and Burkes. I'm Borgin. You just need to go outside and head left, you'll soon hit Diagon Ally."
"What do you put in this…Hand of Glory?" Xander asked.
"A light source, it provides light only to the holder," Borgin said proudly.
"Humph… sounds pretty useful to someone like me," Xander grunted as he thought of how much easier hunting vamps and demons would be if he could see them before they saw him. "How much?"
"500 Galleons."
Xander had done a lot of bartering in his time and knew this guy was trying to fleece him.
"Sure… I'll give you 100 Galleons." He countered.
"I'll take 400 and not a sickle less!" The man said offended.
"Uh huh… 150 and that is my final offer. And before you try and counter let me point out that it is obvious this item isn't selling or worth more than that as there are likely other alternatives and there is a huge amount of dust around its display so it's obvious no one has even looked at it."
Borgin looked flustered and started opening and closing his mouth indignantly as Xander just stared at him.
"Fine 150 it is." He groused. "Don't touch that boy!" He snapped as he saw Harry reach for a locket. "It's killed 19 muggles already."
Xander could already tell this was a shady type of store; the necklace was proof of that. He had been to many dark places in his reality but no society would actively tolerate a device like that necklace.
"How much would it cost to buy your store and all your inventory?" Xander asked. "And before you answer, try not to waste my time with unreasonable amounts."
Borgin slumped at that.
"Alright sir, you serious about this?" He asked money was money and this store was a dangerous occupation, the ministry was always breathing down his neck.
Xander just nodded.
"I have your word that what we discuss about the sale will remain confidential?" He asked.
"You have my word that I will not discuss anything that may incriminate you before, during or after our discussions," Xander said seriously.
Borgin sighed and began his explanation. "The value of most of this stuff is expensive, but not just for standard reasons, they are also dark, borderline dark or illegal. If I were to sell it I would need enough to cover the cost and go into hiding. I could not ask for less than 300,000 Galleons."
Xander had eventually gotten used to his moniker of 'The One Who Sees', he had discovered that although he didn't have supernatural powers, he did have the ability to see the truth and the lies for what they were. It also gave him a unique perspective on situations. He and Giles had discussed it and concluded that his possessions had worked towards giving him some of this ability.
It was for this reason that Xander didn't argue with Borgin. The man had been truthful.
"Very well, I am on my way to the bank, I will return shortly with your money for the Hand and a decision as to the shop." Xander agreed. "Any chance you saw a pair of eyeglasses? My friend here dropped them off when he arrived."
"Have you tried summoning them?" He asked.
"Harry, give it a shot. Just like I taught Neville." Xander instructed as Borgin watched curiously.
Harry took out his wand, thought about his glasses and suddenly got stumped. Was he supposed to call them to him, imagine them floating to him like a levitation spell… he decided that was too complicated as he didn't know where they were so he couldn't imagine their route. Instead, he thought about calling them to him like when his primary school teachers called him over.
Borgin was about to chuckle derisively at the thought of this young kid performing a fifth-year summoning spell. He was therefore shocked when the young boy did it wordlessly.
"By Merlin, that was amazing!" He declared.
"They're broken, Xander." The boy said dejectedly.
"Come on Harry. Use your head. I destroyed half the glass in this shop when I got my hand caught. Mr Borgin managed to fix the lot without a word. You know what I told Neville, watch the adults. Then mimic them."
Borgin had no idea who 'Neville' was but he was no dunce himself. He could put two and two together and see that this young lad was Harry Potter. He was sure that only a boy that special could fix his glasses wordlessly as this boy was currently doing.
"Right then. I will contact you after I have seen the status of my accounts." Xander said as he led Harry out of the shop.
The short trip out of Knockturn Ally was quick, it would have been quicker if an old crone hadn't offered to buy Harry. She was instantly dissuaded by the sharp edge of Xander's sword being pressed into her throat.
Hermione and Nym were easy to find as Nym was the only one with pink hair.
"Thank Merlin you found him!" Nym said as she grabbed Harry in a hug which Hermione joined.
"Yep, even managed to perform two wordless spells," Xander said proudly.
"Xander bought this ugly hand and wants to buy the whole shop!" Harry said with a grimace. He didn't like the shop, it reminded him a little of his cupboard.
"What's this?" Nym asked.
"Nothing much Guv'nor," Xander answered cheekily. "We landed in Borgin and Burkes, he had this hand which is supposed to hold a candle but only give light to the bearer. After hearing that he had a necklace, which killed people, I figured it might be safer to buy the shop and close the place down. It's not the first time I had to do this." It was however the first time he had bought a shop. Previous times he had simply destroyed the shop.
"Borgin and Burkes?" Nym asked incredulously. "YOU TOOK HARRY TO KNOCKTURN ALLY!" She screeched causing half the population of the street to stare at them and the other half to move even quicker.
"'Took'? There was no 'took-ing'!" Xander defended. "He went and I followed."
"How exactly can you mix up 'Diagon Alley' with 'Knockturn Alley'!" Nym demanded as she started checking Harry for injuries.
"When saying 'diagonally' takes you to the same place," Xander said trying smugly. "Borgin said the ministry wouldn't fix it."
"Ha!" Nym laughed derisively. "Borgin would never let us in to fix it as we would have arrested him when we saw all the illegal dark objects."
"Well, once we sorted things out at the bank and bought the place, you can officially go through and receive all the bad little doo-hickeys on behalf of the authorities. Should give you quite a head start on your career."
Nym was just standing there, gobsmacked. Most Aurors didn't get a score like this for years… if ever! Xander was handing her one before she had even finished her first year as a rookie.
"Nym dear, close your mouth and lead us to the bank," Xander said patronizingly.
"Yes sir." She said in a daze as she stumbled her way through the crowds as Hermione tried to guide her around the obstacles. Eventually, Harry decided to give Hermione a hand which seemed to break Nym out of her daze.
"Please tell me that's not the bank," Xander begged as he noticed the huge white building looming in the distance with script etched over the doors.
"I could… but you wouldn't get your money." Nym shrugged.
"Right… and the guys running this bank, what do they look like?"
"About waist high, pointed ears, sharp teeth."
"And how many wars have you been in with them and when was the last one?"
"Tons, last one was a couple of centuries ago," Nym answered.
"Yep," Xander sighed, "Couldn't be easy." Xander looked around the street quickly. He instructed Nym to take the kids to get ice cream and that he would be back shortly. Hermione dragged them along as Xander was the oldest person and that made him the authority in her book. Nym was just helpless and thought she should call Professor McGonagall and Joyce.
Joyce and Minerva were worriedly sipping their tea in the apartment as they waited for their wayward charges to return, Joyce had redirected the Floo. It was nearing 5 pm and they hadn't heard from them. They were therefore startled when Harry fell through the floo and relayed a message from Xander that they might need a stiff drink for Nym.
Harry had been a little worried at that as a 'stiff' drink usually led to some of his harsher beatings from his Uncle. But Xander hadn't tried to hurt him yet so he decided to have faith in his new guardian.
A few minutes later Hermione and Xander came through together whilst supporting a dazed Nym.
"Good grief girl, whatever is the matter with you?" Minerva demanded worriedly as she helped Hermione get the future Auror into a chair. It was rather worrisome as her hair had reverted to its natural mousey brown, this usually meant her concentration was completely shot to hell.
"Xander… Goblins… Burkins…" She mumbled incoherently.
Xander was chuckling away.
"Xander! Make with the 'splain!" Joyce teased using her daughter's atrocious verbal mannerisms.
"I caught up with Harry fairly easily. We were in this shop… Borgin and Burkes?"
"Oh, Merlin," Minerva muttered as Joyce just snickered.
"Well, he had this nifty old severed hand that provides light to the bearer only. I was gonna get that as let's face it, it's easier to hunt when you can see but your prey can't. But Harry nearly touched something that killed 19 people, I figured the shop was a little too dark. Not being back home I couldn't do my usual procedure of burning the place down. So I offered to buy him out.
"We headed off to find Nym and Hermione, then headed to the bank.
"No one told me it was run by demons." He said frowning at the two older women.
"It's run by Goblins," Minerva argued.
"That's not what we called them back home!" Xander retorted.
"What did you call them?" Hermione asked.
"Something with too many hyphens and an unhealthy vowel-to-consonant ratio.
"I asked a few questions of Nym about how often you had wars with them. We learnt back home that if you don't set yourself up as their king by challenging the current leader, they will just keep trying to start more wars. Giles was the king back home.
"Long story short, I sent these three off for ice cream whilst I conquered the local bank."
"Xander's the Goblin King!" Hermione giggled causing Joyce to lose her battle not to laugh.
"You conquered the Goblins?" Minerva asked in shock.
"Yeah, it's not that hard. You just have to challenge the current leader to a duel and then beat the snot out of him." Xander shrugged.
"What about the other goblins?"
"They tend to fall in line behind the winner… in this case, me." He grinned.
"But Goblins are formidable warriors!" Minerva argued.
"Only if they use magic. But their laws and customs state that all contests for Kingship must be resolved without magic and physical prowess only." Xander winced. "I felt guilty when I picked up Ragnok and gave him a noogie."
Joyce burst out laughing. "Oh my! Just like Sally did when he had to conquer them!" She gasped.
"Sally?"
"Salazar, one of my adopted sons and a co-founder of this school," Joyce said as she wiped her eyes with mirth.
Three witches just sat there gaping at Joyce. Minerva and Nym gulped at the fire whiskey.
"Leaving aside Xander's adventures in Goblin land," Joyce continued, ignoring the dumbfounded trio, "How did the shopping and learning go?"
"It didn't," Xander said simply. "I spent all day at the bank. Once I'm happy with things here and can leave Harry to look after himself, I'll make another trip. I'll also wait until then before I head out to the non-magical world."
"You're not going to follow me everywhere?" Harry asked hopefully.
"Hell no! You need to live your life. I'll only be following you until I know what this place is like and I am happy it is safe for you."
This answer was what Harry was hoping for. It was awkward having Xander in his classes the previous day. He felt like he was always being watched, which he was.
"Did you at least get a wand?" Joyce asked.
"We tried!" Tonks answered as she finally snapped out of her daze. "None of the wands responded properly to him. Ollivander says he doesn't even register as having a magical core."
"He does. He must! He made Neville's wand work." Minerva argued.
"He made the other wands work to some extent, but no proper match. But the tests didn't show a core." Tonks explained.
Minerva whipped out her wand and started waving it over Xander's torso. "Well, that is a surprise." She said as she sat back in confusion. "Joyce?"
Joyce just rolled her eyes. "Run the spell over his whole body."
Minerva stood up and this time did as Joyce suggested. Both she and Tonks gasped when Xander's head lit up like a spotlight.
"Why would his core be in his head?" Tonks asked.
"Let me guess, all part of the 'One Who Sees' crap?" Xander said snidely.
"You are what you are, Xander." Joyce shrugged.
"But how will you do magic without a wand?" Minerva asked.
"Same way all magic is supposed to be done." He grinned as he caused a small ball of fire to appear in his right hand.
"Cool!" Harry remarked with a grin as Hermione, Tonks and Minerva gasped in shock.
"See what I mean Minnie? Xander tends to break the rules around magic." Joyce smirked.
Xander could see Harry staring at his hand and focusing very hard.
"Harry, start with something simple, like creating the light from the Lumos spell. Do it the same way I taught Neville. Start with a verbal attempt and a wand. Get a feel for it, then try without the words. Once you can do that comfortably, try it without the wand.
"Minerva, can you cast the same detection spell on Har-OWWWWWWW?" Xander screamed as everyone else did, Harry had succeeded in creating the light, except it was far too bright for the human eye and was exceptionally painful.
Harry quickly doused the light, but the damage was done.
"I can't see!" Hermione cried frantically.
"Easy girl," Tonks said soothingly as she blindly pulled her closer to comfort her.
"Can anyone see?" Xander asked, far too calmly for Tonks' liking.
"I can," Harry said worriedly.
"Yeah, had a feeling you could," Xander grunted. "Harry you are gonna have to be our eyes and make sure we don't knock into anything."
"Don't worry, I can help, a little light won't affect me," Joyce assured them.
"How on Earth did Harry create something so powerful?" Minerva asked trying to remain calm despite her blindness.
"It's all part of the prophecy, Harry was probably born this powerful and it is the reason Tom was defeated by him." Joyce offered.
"Erm… Mrs Summers… I need to use the erm…"
"Oh, of course dear," Joyce said realising what Hermione was trying to delicately ask.
"Harry, would you head to the Hospital Wing and ask Madam Pomphrey to come here, and tell her what happened, maybe she can speed up our recovery," Minerva asked as Hermione was led away by Joyce.
As Harry rushed out of the head's office he couldn't help but feel a bit more hopeful about his life.
Harry had never been a happy child, not that anyone could blame him if they knew about his home life. But recently, since Xander arrived, he had been fluctuating between depression and hope. Xander claimed to be able to free him from his relatives and his torment, but he also revealed that he was supposed to fight the man who made him an orphan. The man who made sure he never knew love as a young boy.
But today Xander had shown Harry just what sort of surprises he could create. Yesterday was an eye-opener with Xander teaching Neville how to perform magic without words. Today Xander had found himself an army.
Harry had spent most of his primary school life in the corner with books. It was the safest way to avoid Dudley and his torture. He had worked his way through all the books to the point where his teachers took pity on him and provided him with more books from their libraries or the local public library. As a result, Harry now knew a little bit about history. Mainly World War II and a few other bits of twentieth-century trivia.
Harry knew the benefit of an army in a war. He knew the benefit of information to save lives.
But what he didn't know was how to use an army. Where to get the information from. Maybe this was what Xander could teach him. Harry was not silly enough to think he could fight Voldemort alone.
Harry was viciously dragged out of his thoughts by a painful grip on his shoulder.
"Potter." Came the silky yet venomous voice of Professor Snape. "Still thinking you're better than everyone else? Out after curfew. Traipsing around like you own the castle."
"Professor McGonagall sent me to fetch Madam Pomphrey, sir." Harry stammered.
"And you expect me to believe that she would do so after curfew? Your precious new bodyguard has no power over the school rules. Fifty points from Gryffindor and a week's detention with Mr Filch. Now, you will follow me back to your dormitory."
"But it's an emergency, sir!" Harry knew they were counting on him to get help Snape wasn't going to help and he didn't even live in the dorms anymore.
"Typical!" Snape spat. "I suppose everything is an emergency and that you always get what you want when you want it. Well, not anymore Potter. Welcome to the real world, your celebrity-ism will do nothing for you here. Just like your father, thinking you're entitled."
Snape began pulling Harry down the corridor back to the Gryffindor rooms, Harry was getting desperate. He didn't know many spells yet and he didn't think he could pull off transfiguring the professor into a needle without a wand yet.
So he performed the one spell he knew he could perform, the one that got him into this position in the first place.
Suddenly a bright light filled the corridor and Snape screamed in surprise.
But it gave Harry the chance he needed to escape Snape's grip and run to the infirmary.
As he reached the doors he barged in loudly causing Madam Pomphrey to exit her office in a hurry.
"Madam Pomphrey! Professor McGonagall needs you in Xander's rooms, I accidentally blinded them all." Harry said breathlessly.
Poppy Pomphrey had been the school medi-witch for decades. She had heard all sorts of stories and seen all sorts of sights.
She had never actually had a student come rushing to confess that they had blinded the deputy head. There was the occasional blinding of other students with potions explosions or spells gone wrong. Every year she had to deal with a Wingardium Leviosa gone awry or a banishing charm accident... But usually, the professors were on the ball and managed to protect themselves.
Quickly brushing off her thoughts and allowing her professionalism to take over, she ordered Harry to lead the way.
Back in the apartment, Joyce was fuming.
"Minerva, you have to do something about that Snape!" She said angrily. "I just received word that he accosted Harry and tried to take him back to the Gryffindor dorms and wouldn't believe Harry when he said you sent him to the infirmary! What if Harry was ill and needed help himself?" She said in exasperation.
"Is Harry alright?" Hermione asked worriedly.
"He's fine. He escaped Snape by blinding him as he did you. He's already on his way back with Poppy." She assured her.
"Cool, if this is how he reacts under pressure then training him will be a cakewalk." Xander grinned.
Seconds later Harry burst in with Poppy hot on his heels.
"Minnie, what is going on?" She asked exasperated. "Mr Potter comes barging in claiming to have blinded you and several others and on the way here I came across Severus arguing with a suit of armour and clearly with impaired vision! To top it off the suit of armour wouldn't let me help Severus, and says he can wait until I've seen to you... Oh, Joyce... Why are you here?" She asked as she noticed the lady in question.
"Harry." She said simply.
"Ah... Do try and keep him out of the infirmary." She half begged.
"Poppy, perhaps you could explain why you seem so familiar with Joyce whilst you try to restore our sight. Harry was trying out a wandless and non-verbal Lumos spell and without his wand to buffer his power, he managed to create a blinding light... hence our little visual issue." Minerva said in mildly clipped tones.
Poppy was not often at breakfast so she wasn't there that morning when Joyce and Xander were introduced to the school. Although she had heard rumours regarding the rugged one-eyed man that killed a troll with his bare hands.
Poppy knew to take apart rumours and extract that barest of information.
"I'll explain whilst Poppy starts with Hermione," Joyce stated. "Simply put, I have found over the decades that it is much easier for me to get to know the on-duty medical personnel so that, if I arrive at the infirmary with a student requiring attention, I don't have to keep explaining who I am."
"Then why have the students never mentioned a mysterious woman?" Minerva asked.
"I do require some privacy, the medical personnel are bound by an oath and I alter the memories of the students."
"You created your own 'Sunnydale Syndrome'?" Xander asked slightly amused.
"Summers Syndrome if you please." She responded primly.
"Well, there doesn't appear to be any lasting damage. Normally you would heal on your own but I can speed things up." Poppy announced as she began casting her wand over Hermione's eyes.
"I can see!" She exclaimed happily.
"Any spots in your eyes? Like if you look at the sun?" Poppy asked.
"No Ma'am." She said respectfully.
"I'm sorry I blinded you all," Harry said worriedly.
"No worries, Harry," Xander assured him. "It was a simple accident and not one any of us expected."
Poppy quickly healed Xander, Tonks and Minerva.
"I suppose I will have to go and find Severus and fix him too." Poppy sighed.
"Oh no," Minerva said firmly. "Joyce, can you have whoever is holding him bring him to the Head's Office? I need to have words with him. Poppy can fix him there."
Joyce nodded.
Xander decided to leave Harry and Hermione to their own devices whilst the adults headed up with Minerva. Nym was going to use the Head's Floo to get home and save wandering outside in the cold.
Harry and Hermione decided to go back to the Gryffindor common room and see their friends where they were instantly set upon by their housemates to dish the dirt.
"Is he single?" Was the first question that came from a sixth-year girl before anyone else got a question in. One of the younger boys tried to ask another question before they answered but was summarily shushed by the rest of the girls. They had their priorities in order.
"I… think so?" Harry tried.
"Even if he wasn't, it's safe to assume he is now. He left his reality and everything behind. He can't go back." Hermione said sadly.
Several girls had images of the mysterious stranger saying a tearful goodbye to a beautiful woman… no one was dumb enough to dissuade them of the idea.
"Why is he here?" Seamus asked.
Hermione and Harry exchanged a look. Hermione was leaving this one to Harry. Harry didn't exactly know how to put this.
"He came… to teach?" He offered.
"He's very good," Neville stated happily.
"What subject?" Alicia Spinnet, one of Harry's new teammates asked, she was trying not to sound too eager. She was doing a reasonable job.
Hermione realized that this could go on for ages so she tried to clear things up and hoped Harry would forgive her.
"He's here to protect Harry. He said something about training Harry."
"He did?" Harry asked, having been out getting Madam Pomphrey when Xander mentioned it.
Hermione just shrugged.
"Where did he take you today?" Percy asked.
"Diagon Alley… Harry got lost and wound up in Knockturn Alley."
"Sweet! What was it like?" One of the Weasley twins asked excitedly.
"Dark… gloomy." Harry shrugged.
"Did you buy anything?" The other twin asked.
"Xander bought a shop," Harry answered wondering if that counted.
"He bought a shop?" The first twin asked.
"As in… the whole shop?" The second asked.
"Which one?" They asked together.
"Erm…"
"Borgin and Burkes," Hermione answered.
"That's one of the darkest shops there is!" Percy exclaimed. "The Ministry has been trying to get in there to shut it down for years."
"He said he is going to let Nym handle that. She's a trainee Auror." Harry said proud of his new friend.
"Seems like something a seasoned Auror should do," Percy said with a frown.
"Everyone has to start somewhere, and I am sure Xander will help her." Hermione retorted primly.
Percy considered this and conceded her point.
"Could you ask him if he'd be willing to let me help as a notetaker? It would be good work experience and look good on my resume." He asked.
"Ok," Harry said simply.
"He might have the goblins' help," Hermione warned.
"Why would they help? Are there goblin artefacts involved?" Percy asked. "Goblins don't usually do that unless there is a lot of money involved."
"Xander's their new king!" Harry said standing taller and grinning.
Several of the younger years were wowing and ahhing. The older years looked confused and sceptical.
"Define…' king'." A seventh-year boy asked.
Harry and Hermione shared a look.
"He challenged the goblin leader to a fight, he beat the goblin leader and now they do what he says." Harry summarised.
"Good definition." One of the twins remarked.
"Dean said he was in your classes, will he be in ours?" An older girl asked hopefully.
"Probably not. He's only going to be a few more of Harry's. He said he just wanted to make sure they were safe and see what Harry was learning." Hermione answered.
"Do you think he would teach me some more magic?" Neville asked with a hint of desperation.
"I don't know. Depends on how busy he is… doing whatever he will be doing." Harry said apologetically.
"Where were you and Granger last night?" Ron asked slightly sullenly, it was bad enough Harry had abandoned him to fight a troll, but now he was being left out altogether.
"Xander has his rooms, he says we have to stay in his spare bedrooms," Hermione answered tightly. She still hadn't forgiven Ron for the nasty things he had said. Not that he had apologized.
"What are they like?" Lavender asked.
"Like a home… a normal home. They don't look like they belong in a castle." Hermione answered.
"Ok, that's enough. It's getting close to curfew. You two had better make your way back to your rooms." Percy said authoritatively breaking up the Q&A session.
"Yeah, wouldn't want Snape or Filch to catch ya." One of the twins joked.
"Harry already blinded Snape with a wandless Lumos," Hermione said proudly.
"That's impossible!" A seventh-year boy exclaimed. "First years can't do wandless magic and a Lumos wouldn't blind a mouse."
"Harry's does." Hermione retorted with a scowl.
"Yeah? Prove it." Ron said snidely.
"Yes, because that would be smart. Blinding everyone here just to prove Harry can." Hermione returned sarcastically.
Percy stepped in and physically shepherded the two first years to the door. He intended to keep an eye on these two. Percy was very ambitious and they were already well connected, he could learn a lot around them, even if they were only first years. He also had a personal reason for doing so. He knew his brother would want to know he had seen Harry, he had been searching for years. Percy was worried though as Bill hadn't returned his owl that he had sent on the 1st of September when he discovered Harry Potter had returned to the wizarding world. He resolved to speak to Professor McGonagall and ask to use the Floo. He normally wouldn't stoop asking for such high privileges for personal matters, but this was important to his brother.
Whilst Harry and Hermione were undergoing their interrogation, Severus Snape was being dealt with in the Head's Office.
"I want that Potter brat expelled! Nay! I want charges brought against him for attacking a teacher!" Snape raged having had his eyes fixed. Poppy had left not wanting to stick around but Nym refused to leave.
"He was defending himself, Severus." Minerva objected. "Something he shouldn't have had to do as you had no business interfering with him. He wasn't out after curfew or a place where he shouldn't have been."
"Of course, if you want to charge him we could use veritaserum to get the truth." Nym offered.
"Yes!" Snape declared triumphantly. "Let's do that. Does the boy with veritaserum and we'll get details of all his crimes, I can get some from my stores. It seems you're not as dumb as you look." Had sneered at Nym.
Nym ignored the sneer and jibe but grinned like the cat that got the cream. "Oh no, we never use that stuff on children, we have to use it on the accusing or accused adult."
Snape paled. "Then we will forego that route for now." He said hastily.
"That may not be an option. You just admitted to possessing a highly restricted and regulated substance… as a sworn officer I must take you in for questioning." She said practically bouncing with glee.
"You're just a trainee. You don't have the authority." Snape spat.
"No, but I do have the obligation to report it."
"And I have the authority to hold you until a full Auror can arrive," Minerva said with a scowl.
"I will not stand for this! Albus will hear of this when he returns." Snape said angrily.
He started to make for the door only to find Xander blocking his path.
"Take a seat." He said calmly.
The look in the healthy eye of the man blocking his escape was enough to make the surly potion master comply.
"Nym, can you call someone in on the… Floo?" Xander asked.
"I can call my partner in. Kinsley Shacklebot, he's a full Auror and my trainer."
"If that's ok with you Minerva, I'll keep Professor Snape company until he arrives," Xander said, his eyes never leaving Snape.
Minerva gave Nym a nod and she headed for the Floo.
"Minerva, you might want to look into a new Potions Teacher. Neither Joyce nor I will let this man near children again. The only way he's gonna stay in this castle is in a cell in the dungeons." Joyce who was scowling in the corner was nodding but the various portraits around the room were also crying out their agreement.
"Oh, dear. I don't know of any capable potions teachers. None that I would trust." She said worriedly.
Snape couldn't help but grin at this.
"I could ask the goblins, they could find someone to take over the history classes too." He offered.
"That should be fine," Minerva said with relief.
"Ha! The board of governors will never accept that and neither will the parents or Albus." Snape laughed derisively.
"Then we can just drop the subjects from the official curriculum and offer it as an extra-curricular activity." Minerva retorted.
Any further discussion was halted by the arrival of a tall black man with a gold earring.
Nym made quick introductions before they got down to business.
"We can take him in for questioning, but we will need permission from the school to search the dungeons," Kinsley warned.
"Xander can give you that. He owns the school." Joyce offered.
"I do?"
"He does?" Various occupants of the room both living and painted exclaimed.
Joyce walked over to one of the portraits. It was a very crude and ancient-looking painting and the figure was barely discernable as human, having almost leonine features.
"I require my documents." She said formally.
"Of course My Lady." The portrait said with a grave voice as the frame swung forward to reveal a hidden compartment.
Joyce reached in and removed the box contained within and took it to the desk.
"I am Lady Dowager Hogwarts. These are my documents of ownership and headship of the School of Hogwarts. They can be verified in the usual manner. A bloodline test will show that Alexander Harris is my heir and Lord Hogwarts." She said formerly as she handed over a set of documents to the tall man.
Kinsley took this all in stride despite the looks of disbelief from the others.
"Tonks, pay close attention to these spells." He ordered his trainee.
With a few swishes of his wand and the documents glowed a bright green. Kinsley then turned to Xander.
"To test your bloodline I will need a drop of your blood on the tip of my wand," Kingsley asked respectfully.
Xander shrugged and reached behind his waist and pulled a sharp dagger from nowhere.
"Wow! Where did you hide that?" Nym asked.
"Not entirely sure. A friend set it up for me, something about a pocket dimension… I just reach in and retrieve what I want." Xander frowned, wondering if he could set that up himself now. Something useful for Harry and Hermione, that girl carried far too many books. She was like a mini Willow.
"Tonks, pay attention." Kinsley admonished now that he had the blood on his wand.
He began to incant slowly as he gently swished his wand through the air. Eventually, Xander's name appeared:
Alexander Lavelle Harris – Lord Hogwarts
Xander groaned. "Couldn't have magic that away?" He whined at Joyce who just stuck her tongue out at him.
Meanwhile, the spell continued, only instead of his parent's names the spell added a single name above his:
Joyce Summers – Lady Hogwarts
"Immaculate conception?" He asked Joyce with a grin.
She just shrugged sheepishly.
"Does this mean I can call you mom?" He asked cheekily.
"Any time you want, I always wanted to adopt you." She said with a sad smile. "I knew about your parents, but that blasted Sunnydale Syndrome kept cutting me off and redirecting me."
Xander just strode over and pulled her into a hug.
"Oh somebody kill me." Snape groaned in disgust.
"Oh oh! Me! Me!" Nym said jumping excitedly and causing Snape to pale and the others to chuckle.
"Sorry Tonks, but even if he signed a confession it would be up to a Dementor," Kinsley said sympathetically.
"Oh poo." She said sulkily as she crossed her arms and stamped her foot.
"I have confirmed the veracity of the documents and the holders of the documents. I also see that they have copies filed at the ministry and Gringotts so I won't need copies myself." Kingsley said handing the papers back to Joyce, who disengaged from Xander and accepted them with a smile before placing them back behind the portrait.
"Then you have my permission to search the quarters, work areas and storage units of Severus Snape." Xander offered.
"Excellent. Tonks and I will transfer him to a holding cell at the Ministry and return immediately to search." Kingsley said with a smile. "If we find what we think we will, then Snape will undergo questioning by veritiserum."
Snape managed to pale even further. He even took on a hint of green.
Snape was made to surrender his wand and then frog-marched through the Floo and out of the castle by Nym and Kingsley.
"I can see it will be a long night." Minerva sighed.
"I can always handle this if you like Minerva." Xander offered.
"It is kind of you to offer, Xander, but as acting Head, I really should be present as well," Minerva said regretfully.
"Well, whilst you two are sorting that out, I'll go and make sure Harry and Hermione are ok and that Harry hasn't blinded anyone else." Joyce teased as she vanished.