Last time:

" I have some news... But I'd rather tell you both together. "

" I already know. " He says looking me directly in the eyes.

My heart lodges itself in my throat at the intensity of the stare.

" What? "

Chapter Seventeen

Tully

I'm not liking the look of fear written all over my Peaches face. Why is she so afraid? It couldn't possibly be of me, right?

I reach out and take one of her hands and do my best to soften my voice. " I had a visit from your cousin yesterday. He let the cat out of the bag. "

It takes her a few moments to realize that I'm not mad. And then another few to get pissy. What a woman.

" Of course he did. " She says angrily. " He never could keep his big mouth shut. I wanted to be the one to tell you. "

I should have been the first to know. That's really my only gripe. " I wish I would have been the first to know. "

"Yeah, I know and I'm sorry. " She says quickly. " You weren't answering the phone and I needed to tell someone because I was freaking out. When Jax found out Wendy was pregnant I was the first person he told. I don't know... I just couldn't keep him in the dark any longer. "

I guess that makes sense... " I'm surprised that Donny didn't tell me when I talked to him a couple of days ago. "

"Don't be mad at him, I asked him not to. " She says sticking up for the dumbass. " I wasn't lying when I said I wanted you to hear it from me first. "

Part of me wants to tell her just how excited the news makes me. Another part of me wants to scream. I do not need to be worrying about her pregnant self while I'm still in here twiddling my thumbs. There's a war going on and this makes things ten times more complicated.

" Yeah. I went to the clinic and they confirmed it. " She says before setting a small square piece of paper in front of me.

Picking it up I see her name in the top corner and a weird black-and-white picture. An arrow points to a small blob. " Well Peaches, this is quite a predicament you know that right? "

" If you want to call this whole thing off I'd understand. " She says jumping to conclusions as usual.

It would be so easy to be mad at this news. To tell her to move out of my house and never darken my doorstep again. The only thing keeping me from it is the father of the baby and the moment we shared earlier. For the first time ever, I feel like I may just get what I want out of life. But that isn't absolute. Nothing is absolute.

If he doesn't want the kind of situation I'm trying to build with both of them... This whole thing could blow up in my face quickly. She's my woman but I don't have the right to keep him from being a father. I wouldn't want to. She's worried about me kicking her to the curb and I'm over here thinking the opposite. What happens if she decides to leave once he's out? To have a normal family without me?

" I can't lie and say I wish this wouldn't have happened. Especially at a time like this. " I start trying my hardest to not say the wrong thing. " You were honest with me about what happened with you and Juice. You weren't, however, completely honest. Why didn't you tell me he went raw? "

A look of shame is written all over her face when she says, " We had protection... I don't remember if we used it, but I definitely handed him a condom. After that... I've been so stressed out and distracted that I never even thought about possibly being pregnant. "

" I'm sorry for sounding like a dick, Peaches. I know this isn't something you planned on happening. " I tell her doing my best to be soothing.

After a few moments of silence she says, " I'm sorry about what happened to Leland. He wasn't my favorite, but I know you two were close. "

" Like you, I too am tired of losing the people I care about. " I say honestly. " Even if the number is a lot fewer than yours. "

She squeezes my hand. " There isn't a monopoly on pain, Ronald. We all feel it. " She says like the wise woman she is.

Smiling I say, " I love it when you say my name ".

" That's why I use it. " She tells me returning the smile even if it is small.

Jaycee

" Just a heads up, your cousin let our man know about the baby too. Straight up vindictive style since he believes the baby is mine. " He tells me while looking toward the door willing it to open.

I never even thought about how Juan would feel about the baby. Of course, he isn't the type to up and abandon his responsibilities. After his father left he and his mom... There's no way in hell he'd do that to me and his kid.

" It figures. I'm pretty sure Jax always knew there was something festering between us. He told him to add insult to injury. " I say shaking my head.

The door opens and Juan is led in by a guard who uncuffs his wrists. When the guard leaves I analyze every inch of him. He looks to be okay but it's my nature to worry. Especially now that I'm carrying his baby. Getting out of my seat I wrap my arms around him and resist the urge to cry. His arms wrap around me making me sigh in relief.

" I'm okay, JJ. " He whispers into my hair.

Pulling away we both sit across from Ronald. " I know Jax told you everything and you're not dumb. "

We don't need to waste any more time pussy footing around the issue. It's time that we're all on the same page.

" Yeah... " He starts not able to look me in the eyes. " I've had the last twenty-four hours to think about it. JJ... Having a rat's baby is not something you want to do. "

Of course, this would be the stance he chooses to take. " I'm not killing our baby, Juan. "

" JJ... Jax knows that I'm the father. " He says making my heart stop. " He knows who really killed Tara. "

Before I can get over one admission, he drops that kind of bomb on me. " Wait, what? Who? "

" Gemma killed Tara. " He says slowly And I helped her cover it up so she'd help me hide. Right before they took him away, he told me he knew I betrayed him. I went to the house to see if she could help me. Before I could get in there was a commotion. By the time I made it into the kitchen Tara was dead and Gemma looked like a deer caught in the headlights. "

" Oh, my God. " I say putting my hand up to my mouth as tears well up in my eyes.

This can't be real. I know Gemma and Tara had a weird relationship but I never thought she'd hurt her. Not the mother of her grandchildren. Not her son's one true love. Not the woman that helped the club over and over again when she didn't have to.

It's then that realization hits me. Jax is going to kill her. He's going to kill his own mom for what she did and there isn't anything anyone can do to stop him. The woman that raised me.

Wiping my eyes I clear my throat. " I don't know what to say to that. Of all the people that could have done it, she was last on my list. "

" Jax wants me dead not because I betrayed him, but because I told her to blame the Chinese. " He says before pausing. " I'm the reason Bobby died. I'm the reason all of this is happening. "

I can't just sit here as he blames himself for everything.

" No. " I say in finality. " Absolutely not. This isn't all on you, Juan, it's on Gemma. You didn't kill Tara and she should have come clean a long time ago. Bobby died because of decisions Jax made for the club he leads. This isn't all on you. "

He shakes his head in defeat. " Either way I'm facing a death sentence by the club or five to twenty years in prison. What kind of father can I be dead or locked away the kid's entire childhood? "

I can't blame him for thinking the worst when all I want is to believe in the best-case scenario. What other choice do I have?

" They'll be taken care of. " Ronald speak up. " But if I have my way you're going to be just fine. "

Juice doesn't want to listen and I can see it written all over his face. " And how do you plan on doing that? "

" Well... " I start and he gives me the same look he gave me when he found out I was screwing Chibs. " I don't know how to approach this, Ronald. "

Tully nods and takes over. " With the predicament, we're all in... You being shunned and marked a dead man. Jaycee is in the middle of this whole war. I've been dicked around by the Sons one too many times... I'm offering you the same thing I'm offering her, a safe haven. A family unit of sorts. "

" I don't understand I thought you were his old lady. " Juice says in confusion.

I know exactly how he feels. " In many ways I am... I'm leaving the MC, Juan. Not my family, but the organization. It was already decided before I found out I was pregnant. Jax is convinced that I've been brainwashed and that's not it at all. I'm ready for change and Ronald's offering it. To all three of us. "

Jax

The others stare while waiting for me to continue.

" There are two unspoken bylaws set from when my dad held this gavel. I want SAMCRO to throw them out. " I say knowing that they aren't going to like what I have to say.

Packer nods. " And what bylaws are you speaking of? "

" No blacks or women. " I say quickly. " T.O. wants to patch SAMCRO. I told him I'd make it happen. "

The older man's eyebrows furrow. " We can see where you're coming from where T.O. is concerned. But women, Jax? "

" Not all women... " I make clear. " I want to patch Jaycee, I think after everything she has done for the club, she has earned it. She's pregnant at the moment, but with Bobby being gone... I was thinking she'd be a good treasurer. Run TM and keep the books. It's already what Bobby and my mom were training her to do anyway. "

Hench clears his throat. " Shit, Jax. We all love Jaycee you know that... I just don't know. "

These men have seen Jayce in action. They know how much the club means to her. Or used to mean to her. I can't do what I'm planning to do knowing that she's going to turn her back on the club. It's not a question of if, it's when. I can't let it go out in the way that she hates SAMCRO because of me. She needs to be there to help pick the pieces up.

" She has dealt with a lot of bullshit the last couple of years. From me especially. " I tell them honestly. " I'm trying to right some wrongs before the vote. This is one of them. "

Packer sighs but nods. " Yeah. You make sure that vote's unanimous... we'll honor your request. "

" Thank you. It's been a privilege to wear this president's patch. " I tell them honestly. " I'm sorry I couldn't live up to it. "

Juice

I stare at both of them dumbly. What the hell have these two been plotting behind the club's back? I never thought I'd see the day that Jaycee would turn her back on SAMCRO. " So you're good with the possibility of retaliation? Jax isn't going to allow this. "

" Jax doesn't have a choice. " She tells me confidently.

I feel my eyes bug out before anger flows through my veins. " Jesus Christ, JJ. Tell me that you aren't staying at the clubhouse while actively plotting to leave. "

" You haven't told him? " She asks Tully with a frown.

Shrugging he says, " it hasn't come up, no ".

" I don't live in Charming anymore, Juan. " She says shooting a glare at Tully. " Ronald had me relocated to his place after Bobby... I haven't been anywhere without bodyguards. "

Tully sighs dramatically. " It's for her protection. "

" Yes... " She says rolling her eyes. " For my protection. "

Slamming my hands on the table I flip the fuck out. " Protection?! You see where I am, JJ? I betrayed SAMCRO and got marked for death. How do you think this is going to end for you when they find out you're the reason I'm still alive? "

" I'm working on it. " She says quietly refusing to even look me in the eyes.

See, this has always been her problem. She always does before thinking things through. " Oh. you're " working on it ". Well why didn't you just say that? "

I'm supposed to be the dumbass here, not her. What the hell was she thinking? That she could just up and leave the only family she knows? That word won't get back to the club that I'm alive and they put two and two together?

Getting up she cups my face in her hands. " Remember when I came to see you after Unser found you in Wendy's apartment? Right before you didn't leave like a dumbass? "

" Yeah? " I grind out angrily.

Sighing she says, " I made you a promise that day that I intend to keep. Even if it means I lose my entire family at TM, I will protect you because you're worth it. I need you to believe that too. If not for me, " She says letting go so she can take my hands and place them on her still-flat stomach. " Then for him or her. My father was killed in prison when I was a kid. You never knew yours. I won't allow history to repeat itself with you. This kid is going to have their dad. "

Damn. My hands are touching exactly where our baby is being developed. Our baby. " JJ... I... " I don't even try to stop the tears as they fall.

Every emotion I've been feeling since Roosevelt told me the truth about who my father was comes flooding out. I wrap my arms around her and bury my face into her stomach.

" I know you think going out for the club is the best thing for everyone. " She says and the shake of her voice tells me she's crying too. " You've been through so much the last few years I can see why you feel like that. But you should know by now that I'd never just discard you. What we have is unconditional. "

I shake my head. " J- "

" No! You need to listen to me for once in your life! Do you have any idea what your death would do to me? Huh? " She says while pulling my face to meet hers. " It would destroy me. Like, what would I do if you weren't here? I had a taste of it when they took you away from the Mayan's. For three days, I thought you were dead. It wasn't anything I'd ever felt before. The world felt so fucking empty when I believed you weren't in it. "

Tully

The scene unfolding before me is truly touching. Hearing about how much they mean to each other is one thing. Seeing it firsthand is breathtaking. I let them go on for a few more moments before getting up and holding my arms out. Peaches looks up at me and then back at Juicy.

He nods and takes one of my hands to allow me to pull him into my embrace. She follows suit and before I know it, both of their scents mingle, intoxicating me. Their bodies fit perfectly into my arms and at this moment I know I can't lose either of them.

" It's going to be okay. " I try to soothe. " No one is going to hurt any of you, I promise. "