A/N: Here we go, second last chapter. Last one might be up tomorrow. The fic's almost done, but I'm still editing.

xxxxx

Chapter 6

xxxxx

"Hello?"

"Detective Beckett?" Kate heard a young girl ask tentatively. "It's Alexis."

"Alexis!" Kate said in surprise. "How are you?"

"I'm fine," Alexis told her. "I'm sorry to bother you like this..."

"Don't worry about it," Kate told her.

"No, I know you're busy," Alexis added.

"Actually, I just wrapped up a case this afternoon," Kate assured the girl. "So you're not interrupting anything, other than some extremely boring paperwork. What can I do for you?"

"If you're sure I'm not interrupting anything," Alexis told her, suddenly feeling foolish. She'd called the Detective impulsively, and now she was feeling nervous about it. "Because I could call back later."

"Alexis, it's fine," Kate assured her with a smile. "I'm really not busy. And I told you that you could call me anytime, remember?"

"Yeah," Alexis admitted.

"So what did you need?" Kate asked.

Alexis took a deep breath. "When did you know what program you wanted to study in college?" she asked suddenly.

Kate's grin widened. Ah. The pre-application panic. It was hitting the poor girl a bit early, but then again she was at a summer program designed to help gifted kids get into Ivy League schools, so it wasn't really that much of a surprise. "To be quite honest, I think I kept changing my mind right up until I filled out my applications, and then again right before I accepted one of them," Kate admitted easily.

"Oh," Alexis replied, exhaling quickly. "Okay then. So how did you decide which program was the right one in the end?" she asked.

"Actually, I changed mid-way through," Kate admitted.

Alexis suddenly felt like an idiot. Of course she had. She remembered that Detective Beckett's mother had been murdered when she was in college. "Of course, I'm so sorry... I shouldn't have..."

"It's okay Alexis," Kate assured her. "In the end it was the right decision for me. Lots of people change their majors midway through. It's totally normal. And it's okay if you're not one hundred percent sure of what you want to do going in. I think most people don't."

"Really?" Alexis asked.

"Really," Beckett assured the girl. "Now what's this really about?" she asked.

Alexis sighed. "I don't know," she admitted. "It's just that, well, I'm at Princeton right?"

"Right," Kate agreed.

"And it's great," Alexis added. "I really love the program, and the people are nice. But half the kids here seem to know exactly what they want to do. What program, what school, what they want to do afterwards. And I have no idea, not really anyway. And I've changed my mind like three times since I've been here. I don't know; I freaked out I guess."

"Well, you've still got a bit of time before you have to make those decisions," Kate pointed out reasonably. "And don't forget, you can always change your mind after you get there if you don't like your program. Seriously, I'm not exaggerating in the least when I tell you that at least half of my friends did. My advice, just pick something you enjoy, something that interests you."

"Okay," Alexis said. She felt a bit calmer now. "Thanks Detective."

"Have you talked to your Dad or your Grandmother about this?" Kate asked curiously.

"No," Alexis admitted.

"Do you mind if I ask why not?" Kate replied.

"I love my Dad Detective," Alexis said softly.

"I know," Kate said with a smile. "And he loves you."

"I know," Alexis said. "I know he does. And usually I can talk to him about anything. But part of me is worried that if I talk to him about this he'll just wave it off with a joke and tell me that I'll be brilliant whatever I choose. Which is great, and I know he means to be encouraging and everything. But the thing is, what if I'm not brilliant?" she asked.

Kate felt a sudden wave of sympathy for the poor girl. "Well, first of all," Kate told her, "I don't know if this is helpful or not, but from what I've seen and from what your Dad's told me I'm sure you will be brilliant. But, let's pretend for a second that you're not, do you really think your Dad's opinion of you will change?" Kate asked gently.

"I just don't want to disappoint him," Alexis admitted.

"Do you honestly think that would ever happen?" Kate asked.

Alexis paused. She had to admit, it seemed like a longshot.

"I'm sure he's very proud of your grades," Kate added. "But even if you didn't absolutely excel at Princeton, or Harvard or Yale or wherever, do you really think your Dad would be crushed? Are you more worried about disappointing him, or yourself?"

Alexis grinned, "You're right, I guess."

"Course I am," Beckett told her. "I also have the added advantage of knowing what you're going through. Alexis, everyone feels like that. And in my experience half of those kids who say they know exactly what they want to do? Sure it works out for some of them, but a bunch of them change their minds and it just plain doesn't work out for at all for the rest. And trust me, you're not alone in not knowing what you want to be when you grow up."

"Okay," Alexis added. "Thanks, I guess I just started panicking and I couldn't stop."

"Stop worrying about it," Kate repeated. "Seriously. It's not a problem. But if you're worried about it I think that you should talk to your father about this. He might be better about it than you think. Every so often he surprises you with his capacity to be serious."

Alexis snorted. "That's true," she admitted, already feeling more relaxed. "I probably will. I just, I don't know. I wanted to sort it out a bit first. Everyone keeps asking me how I like Princeton, and what I'm thinking about for college. I just didn't want to tell my Dad that I didn't have a clue you know?"

"I know," Kate agreed.

"And I'm worried about what he'll do when I go away," Alexis admitted. "I mean, it's bad enough when I'm gone for a summer. But what if I go to Cambridge? That's a whole other continent!"

"First of all," Kate told her. "Your father's going to be worried and miss you wherever you go. This is a decision you're going to have to make on your own though. Because you know what would make him even more upset than you going to live far away in England? If you didn't go where you wanted because you were worried about what he'd think. Do you have any idea how much he'd hate it if you compromised your future because you were worried about him? A lot. I know it's scary, but no one can make this decision for you Alexis. I mean, it's one thing if the idea of going to Cambridge freaks you out too much and you decide not to go. If going that far will make you unhappy then don't do it. Maybe go to Harvard, or Princeton or somewhere closer to home. Or even somewhere like California. That way you're still pretty far away, but you're still living in the same country."

"You're right," Alexis replied. "I know you are."

"It's going to be scary," Kate told her softly. "No matter how you look at it. But you can do it. You'll figure it out. And I still think you should talk to your father once you've sorted some stuff out," Kate repeated.

"I will," Alexis promised.

"Are you a bit calmer now?" Kate asked.

"Yeah," Alexis said with a smile. "Thanks."

Kate shrugged. "You're welcome. Like I said, you can call me anytime." She'd told Castle she'd look out for Alexis once, and she had no intention of going back on her promise. Besides, the girl was pretty great.

"I know you said that," Alexis admitted. "But it just felt weird, what with you and Dad not working together right now and all."

Kate shrugged. "We're still friends," she told the girl. "Besides, your Dad's coming back in the fall. And even if he wasn't you could still call me if you needed to talk."

"Thanks Detective," Alexis said again. "I should probably go, let you get back to work."

Kate sighed. "I suppose so. Still it was good talking to you. Have fun at Princeton, and try not to worry too much."

"I'll see what I can do," Alexis said with a laugh. Bye."

"Bye Alexis," Kate said as she hung up the phone.

Applying to college, Kate said with a shake of her head. She remembered the stress and the panic. At least she didn't have to do that again. And she knew Alexis would figure it out.

She just hoped Castle wouldn't disagree with her advice.

xxxxx

"Beckett."

"You really are a wonderful human being you know that?"

"Castle?"

"Yes," he confirmed absently. "Seriously, you're awesome, and don't let anyone tell you different Detective."

"O-kaay?" she said. "Do you mind if I ask why..."

"So I got this call from my daughter just now," Castle told her. "Explaining how she's apparently been freaking out for the last few weeks about her college applications, and she was worried about disappointing me, like that would be even possible, and she had no idea what was going on, and well, actually you already know all about it. Because as it turns out my daughter decided to call someone and that person apparently talked her through it. And she feels much better about the whole thing now, thanks to that person. Now who do you suppose that person was Detective?"

"It wasn't that big a deal Castle," Kate tried to explain awkwardly. "Alexis called me, and I just talked to her for a few minutes."

"It most certainly is a big deal!" Castle exclaimed. "You made my baby girl feel better Detective. I'm going to buy you a present. What would you like? I could always get you that pony! Or would you maybe prefer something else? Jewellery? Flowers? The best chocolate in New York? Oh! I know! Top of the line laser tag of your very own?"

"What?" Kate asked momentarily confused. Then she shook her head. "No. You don't have to get me a present Castle."

"Yes I do," he insisted.

"No," she repeated. "You don't."

"Well, at the very least I'm bringing you bear claws every day for a month when I get back," he told her.

"Fine," Kate said in exasperation.

"Okay," Castle said with a nod. "Seriously though Detective, thank you."

Kate blushed, glad he couldn't see it. "It really wasn't a problem. I told Alexis if she ever wanted to talk about stuff like that she could call me, and she did. I remember what that was like Castle. It was scary as hell. And sometimes you need an outside perspective. Someone not a family member."

"I'm glad Alexis' is you," Castle told her.

Kate was touched by the obvious sincerity in his voice. "Thank you," she said softly. "She's really a great kid Castle."

"She idolizes you a bit you know," Castle told her.

"Really?" Kate asked oddly pleased by that.

"Oh absolutely," Castle told her. "Don't take this the wrong way, but I hope she chooses a slightly less dangerous career."

"No offense taken," Kate told her. "I get it. And I like her too."

"Good," Castle replied. "After you managed to help out the Castle family so much I really hope that Mike was able to help you out with your case."

"Actually he was great," Kate admitted. "He noticed a discrepancy in the way a bunch of the prints were labelled. Turns out a bunch were missing that we might not have caught otherwise. The theft led us right to our killer."

Castle grinned. "Glad to hear it. After all, you always get cranky when you're having trouble getting your man."

"Yeah well," Kate said with a grin. "Mark of a good cop."

"Absolutely," Castle agreed. "Still, I'm glad I could help you close your case."

"Me too," Kate admitted.

"So how are you otherwise?" Castle asked.

"Good, you?" Kate replied.

"Good, wrapping up the book now," he told her casually.

"That's good," she said with a nod.

"Hey Kate?" Castle asked suddenly.

"Yeah?"

"Can I ask you something?" He'd run it over and over in his head millions of times, but he couldn't think of any other way of going about it other than asking her directly. All of his attempts at getting the information sideways had somehow been thwarted. He was just going have to bite the bullet and get it over with.

"Sure," she told him easily.

"Why didn't you tell me you'd broken up with Demming?" he asked.

Kate froze. She hadn't been expecting that. "Oh," she stuttered. "I guess it just never came up." The excuse sounded lame even to her own ears.

"Right," Castle said, seeming to accept that.

"Who told you?" she asked curiously.

"My mother," he admitted. "She said you'd mentioned it when you were talking to her."

"Oh yeah," Kate agreed. "I guess I did. Sorry I didn't tell you. Like I said, I guess I didn't think to mention it. Things were awkward enough to begin with anyway."

"When'd the two of you decide to end it?" he asked.

"Oh, a while ago," she said casually. "Near the start of the summer. It's a few months ago now, which is probably why I never thought to mention it. I don't remember the exact date or anything." It wasn't a lie. She knew when the breakup had occurred relative to other events of course, but she had no idea what day of the week it had been, or the date.

The start of the summer? Castle froze. He wondered exactly when, but didn't want to press the issue too much further in case she shut down. He could tell she was uncomfortable enough already. "I'm sorry." He said instead. "Demming seemed nice."

"It's okay. He was nice, but it just wasn't right you know? Sometimes you think you want something, and that it'll work. The relationship's great on paper, but in the back of your mind you know something's missing. You know what I mean?" Kate asked softly.

That was too close for comfort. Castle knew exactly what she was talking about. He decided to go for the joke. "I've been married twice, remember?"

She laughed. "That's true. That why they both ended then? Because something was missing? So prosaic. I'm disappointed the tabloid rumours proved to be false. After all, alien lovechild`s a much better story. And I know how you feel about good stories."

"Why do you think I never refuted it?" he replied smoothly. "And you seem to know a lot about what the tabloid stories say about me Detective," he told her playfully.

"Shut up," she told him easily.

He grinned, before returning to the previous, and more serious, topic of conversation. "No, there were more direct reasons why my marriages ended, smaller, more specific reasons," Castle admitted. "But in the end it all probably boiled down to something just wasn't right."

Kate was surprised by the genuine answer. This was a side of Castle she rarely ever saw. "You ever think you'll get it right?" she asked softly, before she could stop herself.

"Maybe," Castle replied. "I don't know. I kinda like being a famous playboy author. It can be pretty fun," he said with a forced laugh.

"Of course," Kate said, her heart dropping, and her voice turning hard. She cursed her own stupidity. Of course he liked his life the way it was. She'd known that already.

Castle wasn't always smart, but he wasn't a complete fool either. He couldn't decide exactly how he wanted the conversation to go, but he didn't want her hanging up thinking he was completely incapable of sustaining a relationship anymore. So he gave her a more serious answer. "Also," he added, "There's Alexis to think of. Part of the reason I married Gina was so Alexis would have some sort of a stable female role model and we all know how that turned out. Not to mention, three failed marriages doesn't look great, even in the most liberal of circles."

Kate forced herself to calm down. She knew Castle always went for the joke. She knew that. There was more under there, but the problem was you could never be sure which side would win in the end. I don't know Castle," she replied. "Aren't multiple marriages practically a mark of celebrity now? It might help your image in the long run."

"I suppose," he agreed. "But, Detective, the thing about serious relationships is that they change things. It's one thing if it's someone you don't ever have to see again, but once you get married, that's a legal contract. You're going to see that person again throughout your life, at least that's been my experience. If the relationship's going to matter, well, it can cause a lot of change in a short period of time."

"I know what you mean," Kate agreed. And she did know. She knew exactly what he meant, even if he didn't. She'd been right. Castle didn't know what he wanted. And neither did she so that worked out perfectly fine didn't it? Just swell.

"We still try though don't we?" Castle asked whimsically. "Anyway, I'm sorry things didn't work out with Demming."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," Kate replied. "But it was a bit awkward." Just like now, she thought to herself.

"Yeah," Castle admitted. "Thanks for helping Alexis."

"Thanks for helping with the case," Kate shot back.

"Anytime," he replied.

"Ditto."

"See you in September then," he replied.

"Yeah, night Castle," she replied as she hung up the phone.

Beckett tried to ignore the weight in her chest that felt suspiciously like disappointment. After all, this was what she'd wanted wasn't it? And she had the satisfaction of knowing that she'd been right. It was better all around that she hadn't gotten to tell him. They had a good friendship. Wouldn't want to screw that up with too much change.

xxxxx

"Ryan."

"Hey bro."

"Oh hey man," Ryan greeted his partner.

"Guess what I was found out using superior investigative skill today?" Esposito asked.

"I dunno," Ryan replied. "Were you hanging around the vending machines again? Did you learn that they're switching back to Pepsi and getting rid of the Coke?"

"No," Esposito replied, sounding affronted. "This is much more interesting than that."

"Oh, did you confirm the rumour that Hendricks in Vice and Shaeffer from Fraud were sleeping together?" Ryan asked hopefully..

"No," Esposito grumbled. "Still no word on that one."

"Too bad, I've got ten bucks riding on it," Ryan admitted.

"Me too," his partner confirmed. "But this is a bit closer to home shall we say."

"Montgomery's transferring?" Ryan guessed. "Or getting a promotion?"

"Nah," Esposito replied. "He's still stuck with us."

"Good." Ryan replied. "But I give up. "Just tell me."

"Castle's definitely coming back in the fall," Esposito told him as he sat back on his couch.

"Really?" Ryan asked.

"Yup," Esposito agreed. "I just got confirmation from a reliable source that he's coming back in September."

"Does Beckett know about it?" Ryan asked.

"Apparently he called Beckett to make sure it was alright," Esposito explained. "At least that's what I heard."

"Meaning your so-called top secret source is Lanie," Ryan replied, filling in the blanks.

"I'll never reveal my informant's identity," Esposito replied.

"Uh huh." Ryan replied sceptically. "At least your information's probably reliable. Unless she's screwing with you again of course."

"Shut up," Esposito replied. One time, one times he managed to convince him that the station's Christmas party was going to be black time, and he was never going to live it down.

"Did Lanie say what Beckett thought about it?" Ryan asked.

"Well, she's told him he could come back," Esposito replied. "So there's that."

"Yeah, but given that as far as I can tell she's pretending their last face to face conversation didn't happen that's hardly surprising," Ryan pointed out.

"Think we should forget about it too?" Esposito asked.

Ryan paused. "I dunno. She probably wants us to. And it's not like it was Castle's fault."

"Nah," Esposito agreed. "But on the other hand..."

"It's Beckett," Ryan finished.

"Yeah."

"We could always ask her," Ryan suggested.

Esposito laughed. "Yeah, I can just imagine that conversation. 'Hey Beckett, heard Castle's coming back. Just a question, do you want Ryan and I to take him out back and punch him in the face but not tell him why? Would it make you feel better?' I'm sure that'll go over well."

"We could settle for smacking him upside the head a couple of times," Ryan suggested.

Esposito considered it. "Works for me."

"This fall could be interesting," Ryan replied with a sigh.

"Yup," Esposito replied.

"Thanks for the heads up man," Ryan added.

"No problem," Esposito agreed.

"Hey, do you think he'll bring us more pastry?" Ryan asked.

"I hope so," Esposito admitted.

"You want to come over and watch the game?" Ryan asked.

"I'll bring the beer," Esposito offered. "See you in ten minutes."

"Yeah," Ryan said as he hung up the phone.

xxxxx

"Beckett."

"Hi, it's Ryan," the Detective said awkwardly.

"Oh hey," Beckett said. "We got a case or something?"

"Uh, no," Ryan admitted. "I just thought I'd call to say hi."

Beckett paused in the middle of folding her laundry. This was different. Ryan didn't usually call to chat. "Hi," she said, feeling a little silly.

"Hi," Ryan repeated. "So, how are you?" he asked.

"I'm fine," Beckett replied, feeling somewhat confused. "How're you?"

"Oh good," he replied. "So I heard Castle's definitely coming back in the fall," he added.

Beckett closed her eyes briefly. She should have known. "I see good news travels fast," she replied.

Ryan shrugged. "You know how it is."

"I do," she agreed. "I'm assuming Lanie told Esposito, who told you."

"Dunno, he wouldn't reveal his source," Ryan replied.

"He didn't need to," Beckett said dryly.

"Not particularly, no," Ryan agreed.

Beckett snickered.

"Anyway," Ryan said, "I just wanted to give you a call, make sure you were okay with it."

"Okay with it?" Beckett asked surprised.

"Yeah," Ryan said slightly unsure. "I mean, he kind of keeps popping in and out every so often," Ryan explained. "Last spring was a bit of a surprise for all of us."

Kate hands stilled in the middle of tossing socks in a basket. She really didn't want to talk about this with her team. "I guess," she agreed. "But Castle's a good guy, and he helps with cases right? Isn't that all that matters in the end?"

"I guess," Ryan agreed. "Still, we've kind of gotten used to not having him around again," Ryan pointed out. "I mean, I like him and everything. He's great. Don't get me wrong, but I just wanted to make sure he wouldn't be upsetting your, our... rhythm," he finished lamely.

"Nope," Beckett replied. "No rhythms upset. We all get along right? You guys don't mind having him back do you?" she asked, suddenly concerned. She'd been so caught up in how she' d felt about the whole thing that she hadn't even considered asking the guys what their opinion was.

"Not if you don't," Ryan replied. "Castle's always fun." Besides he and Esposito always knew where they stood when it came right down to it, anywhere that wasn't directly between writer and muse. Neither of the male Detectives had any intention of throwing themselves into the mix. Beckett and her tag-along would have to figure this one out for themselves.

"Isn't this some sort of violation of the guy code?" Beckett asked. "Talking to me about it? I know you and Esposito have gotten into some stuff with Castle last year. The three of you are friends too."

"Partner code trumps guy code," Ryan told her with a smile. "We've got your back, you know?"

Beckett grinned. Ryan really was ridiculously sweet sometimes. "Thanks," she replied. "But at the moment I don't actually need it."

"You sure?" Ryan asked.

"I'm sure," Beckett replied. "Castle and I are friends," she stressed. "We're all friends, right? No reason for us not to be. All of us," she repeated.

"Okay," Ryan agreed, understanding perfectly. If she wanted to forget about it that was her call. He sure as hell didn't want to get in the middle. He would if she asked of course, but he didn`t want to. "Good, but if you change your mind..."

"I won't," Beckett told him.

Ryan grinned, "Does your friendship with Castle mean you don't want in on the hazing Esposito and I have planned for him when he gets back?" he asked.

Kate grinned. "Are you kidding?" she asked. "I'm in! What'd you guys have in mind?"

"Still in the early stages," Ryan told her. "We're still going through some ideas. If you come up with anything let us know."

"Absolutely!" Beckett said enthusiastically.

"Alright," Ryan replied. "Well, I guess I should let you go, stop interrupting your evening."

"Okay," Kate agreed pleasantly. "I'll talk to you later."

"Talk to you later Beckett," Ryan said.

"And Ryan?"

"Yeah?'

"Thanks for the call."

"Anytime," he told her with a grin.

Kate shook her head slightly as she hung up her phone. Even if stupid writers were incapable of behaving like adults, at least she'd always have her boys.

xxxxx

TBC