I promise I'm not dead. At least, not yet. I've been REALLY busy with school and other life projects. Fanfiction as a whole kind of got put on the back burner. One of those projects is live streaming. You lot are welcome to follow me on Twitch at Jaredr103. I promise, it's not as cringy as some of these stories.

Speaking of stories, it's been a few months since I updated this one. Thanks to everyone who's been sticking with me so far. I promise, this story will get an ending before the year is up. 3 more dates to go after Alice.

Hope ye enjoy!

Chapter 9: This is How to be a Human

Kazuto awoke from such a deep sleep, he wasn't sure what time it was. The room was dimly lit, but outside seemed dark. He checked his phone and the clock read 1:36 am, Wednesday. He was going to say something, but his throat was dry. But when he went to get up, he found that something was holding him down. Well... not something, someone.

Asuna was snoring lightly as she laid on his chest. Her chestnut hair sprawled across the covers. It was then that he remembered their night together. She had basically worn them both out with how many times they did it. He stroked her hair and kissed her head. "This is a sight I can get used to."

Before long, a new voice entered the room. "Quite a fun night you two had." The voice was coming from outside the door.

Kazuto looked over and shook his head. "How did you trick her to bring you here?" He could tell, even through the scratchy effects, that it was Yuuki who had been spying on them. "As I recall, you were with Yui when we went to bed."

"Well, we were. Then we heard Asuna being... loud, and asked Yui to take the box to the door before she fell asleep." Yuuki snickered from outside. "Seems like she's satisfied."

Even though he was embarrassed, he couldn't get up to take her away. "Go away, Yuuki. She's still asleep."

The younger twin had a devious idea. "No! No! Bring the box inside! I wanna mess with her when she's dressing."

"You're incorrigible." After a few more minutes, Asuna rolled off of him in her sleep, allowing him to finally get up. "You owe me. You and Aiko get to be my test subjects for my light cube project."

"Oh please, we were going to do it anyway."

Good on his word, Kazuto got up, clad only in his boxers, and moved the small box to the shelf near Asuna's mirror. "Don't cause too much trouble. If I come back home later and she's yelling at me..."

"It'll be alright, Kirito! You have another date today, right?"

"Yep." He crawled back into the bed and rubbed Asuna's naked back. "Now go to sleep. Wait, do ghosts even sleep?"

"We can, but we don't have a reason to." Yuuki looked around at all the photos, then back to the bed. Their California King size bed was more than big enough for the two of them. "Mind if I join you? Aiko is sleeping in Yui's room."

Kazuto thought about it for a second. There was plenty of room now for one more in the luscious white and red bed. "Sure, come on." He felt the bed compress on the other side of Asuna. "You know, it's weird."

"What's weird?" Yuuki asked.

"I know you're on the other side of the bed, but your voice is coming from over there." He sighed. "I promise, I'll get the light cube done as fast as possible."

Yuuki smiled, not that he could see, and nuzzled into the pillow. "Don't stress yourself out, Kirito. Spare some time for Asuna and Yui. Not to mention, the possible bun in the oven."

Kazuto blushed as he pretended not to hear. "I-I won't work too hard, now go to bed." He rubbed Asuna's back as he shut his eyes.

Yuuki only giggled.

Hours later, Kazuto awoke a few minutes before his alarm was to go off. "You still here, Yuuki?" He could hear the sound of Asuna snoring, as well as an added sound. It was a bit lighter and came from a sharper angle to his left. 'Yep, she's still here.' He picked up his phone and checked the time. 6:58 in the morning. He'd texted Dr. Kyojuro the night before and asked her to have Alice meet him at the house around 8:30 so he could take her to breakfast.

He carefully lifted Asuna off of his chest and laid her down by his side. As he stood up, he heard her roll. He feared that she would roll into Yuuki, causing the spirit to wake up, therefore waking Asuna as the box went off. However, she rolled to where he was just laying.

Kazuto shook his head. "Heavy sleeper still." He turned the alarm off to let her sleep. Afterwards, he continued his morning routine. He brushed his teeth before taking a quick cold shower. Their water heater wasn't the best and only held about ten minutes of hot water before it went cold, so he would bite the bullet and take a cold one. Even if he had the shower first, he would use the cold water to save it for her.

Once he was out of the shower, he pulled on his black zip up hoodie and blue jeans. Asuna and Yuuki were still asleep. It was still odd how he could see Asuna sleeping while hearing Yuuki's breathing from the box. "Sleep tight, you two."

He stepped out of the room to find Yui stretching. "Papa?"

"Morning, Yui. How was your sleep over with Aunt Aiko?"

The android yawned. "Its odd because I know she's there, but I can't talk to her since I moved the box."

That brought back the reason why she moved it. Kazuto tried to hide his blush. "D-Did Aunt Yuuki tell you why she wanted the box moved?"

"She told me that she had a question for you, but you were asleep."

"Y-Yea, asleep."

Yui's dark eyes looked at him questioningly. "What was that?"

"N-Nothing. She didn't ask me anything when I woke up. Wonder if she fell asleep too." He chuckled and quickly walked past her. "Aunt Alice will be here in a little while."

"Want me to wake up Mama?"

"N-No, she's really sleepy. It'll be best to let her sleep in today." He stepped into the kitchen and was shocked when he saw a certain blonde sitting at the table. "A-Alice?"

Alice stood up from the table and bowed. "Pardon the intrusion. Your door was unlocked so I let myself in. I hope that's alright."

After recovering from his initial scare, Kazuto joined her at the table. "It's fine. Asuna and I like to leave it so that any of our friends can come in whenever it's needed. Sinon came in the other day and liked to have scared Asuna to death."

She giggled a bit. "You two really are the epitome of a newlywed couple. Where is she now?"

His cheeks went red as he thought of his previous actions with his wife. "She's asleep still. She was up all night talking to a friend of hers." He wasn't really lying, but they weren't just talking." Yui came over and offered him his coffee cup. "Thank you, Yui. So, Alice, what do you want to do today?"

"What do I want to do?"

"Sure. You haven't been here all that long, so there's a lot for you to know."

She poked her fingers together as she thought. "I don't know what to do first."

He sipped his cup slowly. "Let's see. We've played all the games we have, so there's nothing new to do there. Hmm..."

"What about sex?"

"PFFFTTTT!" Kazuto spit out his coffee. After wiping his mouth, he stared wide eyed. "What!?"

"Was I wrong to bring it up?" She cocked her head to the side. "I thought it was a normal part of human interaction."

"W-W-Well, it is... but it's not something to talk about so casually." He grabbed a paper towel and wiped up the coffee. "Where did you even hear about that?"

"I've known about sex since the Underworld. The Prime Minister would often speak of it when he left the Pontifex's chambers." She thought back to her days as a knight. "Although, I never did get all of what he was talking about."

Kazuto took a deep breath. Knowing Alice, she wasn't going to let this go until she knew exactly what she wanted to know. "Let's get this over with..." He mumbled. "What about sex do you know?"

"Let's see. I know that it's for making babies, and it's between a man and a woman. You and I for instance, we would be candidates for sex partners." The way she said it so casually make it difficult for him to keep a straight face.

"Alice, wouldn't you rather talk about this with someone who could explain this better than me? A girl maybe? Asuna?"

"But I trust you to give me a straight forward answer. If it's too much of a bother..."

"N-No, let's put the matter aside for a little while. When Asuna wakes up..."

Just then, Asuna came into the kitchen. "Kazuto-kun! How did Yuuki..." She stopped when she saw their guest. "Oh, hello Alice."

"Good morning, Lady Stac... I mean, Asuna." She still was adjusting to the fact that Asuna and Lady Stacia were one in the same.

"I didn't expect you to be coming here this early." She sat in the chair next to her husband. "Morning, my love."

Suddenly, Alice blurted out, "Asuna, can you tell me about sex?"

"WHAT?!"

Kazuto snickered. "That was about my reaction." He sipped his cup.

Alice once again cocked her head. "Kirito said it's a topic I should ask to you about since you are also a girl."

Once Asuna relaxed a bit, she took Alice's hands. "Alice. C-Can we talk about this another time? You have a date with Kazuto-kun, don't you?"

"Yes. I do." She turned to face him. "So can we have sex on our date?"

""NO!"" Both husband and wife slammed their hands down. Kazuto relaxed first. "Alice, that's something for between a couple, like Asuna and I." He was then reminded of doing that exact thing last night, many times.

"I see." She put her hand to her chin. "Sincerest apologies then, Lady Stacia. Regardless, what are we to do for our date today, Kirito?"

Asuna, feeling very possessive wasn't sure that she even wanted them to go on a date anymore. She knew that Rika might try and take advantage of him, but now Alice just blurted out the idea in front of her. She had to come up with a way to steer the conversation away from that. She thought about it for a moment. "Shinonon took him to the movies, Yui took him to the park, I had a nice day at home with him yesterday..." She nuzzled his shoulder. "Keiko wants to go to the cosplay convention tomorrow and I think Suguha wants to go to Yuna's concert on Saturday."

"Yuna? Who's Yuna?" Alice asked.

Kazuto smiled at the bittersweet memories. "Yuna is an AI, kind of like you. She's designed to be a replica of an SAO player who tragically died. Her father recreated her and made her an idol singer. She's amazing."

Asuna perked up. "Oh yea! Yuna and Eiji came to the Underworld to try and stop POH."

"She sounds like a great person."

"Well, we can go meet her." Kazuto pulled out his phone. "She owes me a couple of favors and I know how to reach her in ALO. So, what do you say Alice? How about meeting Yuna?"

Alice smiled. "That sounds fun. I liked the music played in the RATH." She stood from the table and followed him into the living room. She sat on the couch and laid down.

"Asuna, can you go grab my Amusphere from my office?"

"Sure." She returned after a couple of minutes with the ring in hand. "Here."

"Thanks." He plugged it in and sat in the chair. "You and Yui have fun with Yuuki and Aiko. We'll be back." He turned it on. "Ready Alice? Yuna said she can meet us at the cabin in 10 minutes."

"Ready." She laid down and kicked her feet up.

Kazuto pressed the button on the recliner and laid back. "Link Start!"

The light faded and Alice found herself standing inside the familiar cabin. "It's been some time since I've been here."

"Yea. Before the wedding."

She turned back to find the fairy version of Kirito standing behind her. His regular black armor on with Excalibur on his back. "Kirito."

"Come on, she'll be here in a little while." They went inside and sat in the living room. He went into the kitchen and made her some tea. "Here. It's not as good as Asuna's but it's still drinkable."

"It's fine, thank you." She sipped her cup and then set it down. "So how did you meet this Yuna?"

"Well... that's a long story."

"One that has a lot of musical twists and turns!" They both turned to the center of the room to find a red glittering light shimmering around a silhouette. When it faded, Yuna stood before them. "Hello, Kirito! It's been a while."

"Hi Yuna."

Alice stared wide eyed at the newcomer. "H-Hello. My name is Alice. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Yuna bounded over and shook her hand. "So you're the fellow android. Kirito told me about you."

"He did?"

"Sure!" She twirled around and smiled.

Kazuto stood up between them. "Alright, so you want to know how we met, Alice?"

"Yes."

"We met because Yuna's father was trying to steal memories of Sword Art Online to recreate her."

Alice was a bit shocked. "Is this true?"

Yuna's smile faded as she sat down. "Yes. My father was misguided in his attempts to resurrect white Yuna. However, Kirito succeeded where my father failed." She stood up and snapped her fingers. In a small burst of light, her outfit became a white hoodie instead of her black and red idol outfit. "Kirito saved white Yuna from the SAO servers and imbedded her into black Yuna. Now, we are one. We are both Yuna."

Alice stumbled a bit a she tried to keep up. Kazuto braced her stance. "Try not to think about it too hard. Point is, there were two Yunas, now there is only one. This is Yuna."

"So are you an android like me? Do you have a body in the real world?"

Yuna sighed. "No, I don't. I'm like Yui was before she had a body. Using the Augma, you can see me, but otherwise you need to be in a game."

Kirito snickered. "Is that your way of asking me to make you a functional body for you two?"

"Well... if you're offering..."

"I'd have to get with Eiji. He knew you more than I did."

"Oh that would be wonderful!" She jumped up and hugged him. "Thank you, Kirito!"

Alice blushed a bit and turned away. She was fine with Asuna being this close, but not someone she'd never met. "I doubt it'd be as functional as mine."

"That's fine. I just want to be able to hold Eiji's hand again. I miss being with him so much. I can only be with him in the game." Her eyes were downcast as she stepped back from Kirito.

This made Alice feel a bit better. Yuna said she was in love with another. The last thing she wanted was to have another rival for his attention. "Is there anyway I can help?"

Kazuto turned to her. "I may need some parts from what's left of RATH to build her body. I'm sure she'd also be willing to pay for it."

"Of course! Even though I'm an AI, I still was able to negotiate the contract to keep some profits from my concerts." She smiled weakly.

"I've never heard you sing before." Alice sat across from her. "If it's not too much trouble, could you sing a song for me?"

"I'd be honored to!" Yuna spun around one last time and reverted to her black Yuna form. "I hope you're ready to get your socks knocked off!"

"I don't think that's possi-" She stopped when Kazuto put a hand on her shoulder.

"It's an expression. Just watch, she's amazing."

Insert "Smile for You" by Yuna (Sayaka Kanda)

yasashii kotoba wo anata ga kureta

sabishii toki ni wa dakishimete kureta

kanashii koto mo atta kedo

asai haru no yorokobi mo

futari de wakeatta

toki ga owaru mae ni

tooi hito ni

nokoshitai kotoba wo sagashita

arigatou to tada kurikaeshita

sore dake ga anata no mune ni

todokeba ii

kokoro yo dou ka tooku

sora wo kakete

hohoemi wo anata ni tsutaete

kiete yuku haru no

nagori no you na

nukumori dake wo sono mune ni

sotto

nokoshite iketara

smile for you

(Authors note: Thank you Sayaka Kanda for your amazing work. We miss you very much. RIP)

Yuna panted as she dropped back down on the couch. "Whew! That was fun! I haven't done that song in a while." She basically melted into the couch.

Kazuto chuckled and conjured and cool ice spray and moved it over the idol. "Here, this should cool you down."

"Thanks, Kirito."

Alice was clapping. "That was wonderful. Thank you very much for the private concert."

Yuna gave her a wink and a thumbs up. "You're very welcome, Alice. I do apologize, but I need to go get set up for the concert Saturday."

Kazuto sat up. "I'll be there with my sister, Sugu. Anyway you can meet her too?"

"Kirito. I owe you my life, so nothing's ever too much for me to pull off." She rose to her feet. "See you guys later!" She blew a kiss to the duo a disappeared into red sparkles once more.

"She's very..."

"Odd?"

Alice giggled. "Yes, odd is a good word."

Kazuto sat beside her. "She's a lot like Yui that way. Very peppy. Is this all you wanted to do? I'm sure we still have time."

She looked off to the right of her vision. "I'm sorry, I'm scheduled to go to a board meeting today at 1. Dr. Kyojuro said I needed to be back by noon."

"I understand. We can always hang out here whenever you want to. Oh and I can probably get you viewer access to Yuna's concert if you'd like."

"I would like that, thank you Kirito." She smiled warmly before logging out. He soon followed suit.

They opened their eyes to find themselves once more in the living room of the Kirigaya house once more. Kazuto sat up and placed the Amusphere on the coffee table. "Sucks you have to go back so soon."

"Yes, it is unfortunate. I'm not sure when the next time I'll be able to see you in person is." Alice sat up and straightened her long dress.

"I'm sure we can set something up." He grabbed her coat from the rack and handed it to her. "How cold is it outside?"

"I can't tell. This metal chassis doesn't really let me feel the cold."

"Then why where a coat and dress?"

She blushed a bit, since that was something she could do even as an android. "It's what I would've worn this time of year in the Underworld. It just..."

"Feels right?" Kazuto finished.

"Yes."

Asuna rounded the corner to see them near the front door. "Are you two done already?"

He moved to his wife's side and wrapped an arm around her shoulder. "Yea. Alice has a meeting to get to so she has to leave early."

"Oh. I wish we would have known that. We could've rescheduled..."

Alice waved her hands. "No, it's alright. I have meetings and conferences all week."

"The life of a star."

"More like show pony." Asuna giggled and laid her head on his shoulder. "It's been nice having you here, Alice. Please, come back soon."

"I will. Thank you for treating me to our date, Kirito."

"Come on, it wasn't much."

"Nevertheless, it was still special. Thank you both for your hospitality." And with that, she opened the door and left.

Asuna looked up at him. "So, what did you do?"

"I got Yuna to sing her a song."

"That was it? Wait how did you even get in contact with Yuna?"

He waved his phone which conveniently popped up a message from a contact labeled as Yuna. "She owes me a favor." Kazuto chuckled when she pouted at his vague answer. "Come on, let's go prank Yuuki. We can hide her box to where she won't find it. Loud mouth won't be able to talk for a little while."

"Oh please, she'll keep yelling until we find it for her." They both chuckled and returned upstairs to their bedroom. It was nearing the end of their university break and they wanted to spend as much time with each other as possible before they had to go back.