"Temperance, my dear… come in, come in" The man standing the doorway ushers me with a shocked yet silly grin. "It is early for our impromptu dinner but we can partake in…" He stops speaking and just smiles, we both know why I am here. It has been six months in the making. Each pivotal point leading up to an insurmountable feat, a majestic undertaking for the hope of my sanity.
I love him.
I want to marry him.
He is my world.
Without stopping to even acknowledge the man I so rudely interrupted, I walk though the foray to his kitchen table a path that has been firmly etched in my memory. I showed up in the middle of the night a few months back, sure that he was the keeper of the answers I seek but as the sun began to rise I quickly realized that I was the keeper of the answers. I always was but as the late night meetings had become a weekly event, he assured me that the time would come when they would be revealed, and tonight is that night.
"Tea? Crumpets?" He asks, trying to keep up, "You are quite early this evening, I didn't have time to…"
My eyes flick up and he smiles.
"Scotch it is."
I look up from my shaking hands just in time to see him sit and slide the glass across the table, filled to the brim and leaving an amber trail in its wake.
"Dr. Wyatt…" I lightly laugh at the glare radiating from the other side of the table, "Gordon… I… I… need to talk…"
"That has become quite apparent recently…" His voice lightly soothes, ""It is only 6:23, it seems awfully early for your nightly routine."
"I…" I shudder as wave after wave of fear falls on my fragile heart, "I think I need to verbalize some realizations I have concluded must be correct for any hypothesis to fit within rational means." I try to speak in my most clinical voice but the fragility of my words betrays me, seeping through every crack of my barely beating heart.
"About a certain man who shall remain nameless?" He smiles, "I doubt those flowers and tight black dress are for me. Flattery has never been your forte, Temperance, we both know this so what brings you to my door this early in the evening?"
"I think…" I lightly sob, "I think…"
"You think or do you know?"
My eyes slowly draw up from my glass, attempting to glare him into oblivion.
"You may be able to fool your coworkers and even the man who has without hesitation fallen for you when you were without grace but you did not come to them in the middle of the night, completely heartbroken and destroyed. You came to me, a man who long ago has distanced himself from your emotional qualms."
"He told me he loved me. That he loved the thought of us… then he ran, what was I to do? They just don't understand."
"And you believe I do?"
"You seem to hold reasonable qualifications, yes." I nod. "You hold ample knowledge of both our working aptitudes and emotional interdependence."
"Unrequited love can make even the strongest man… or woman fall. Historically kingdoms have risen and fallen because of such notions... sometimes even for less." He leans back, smug smile forming at his lips.
"Unrequited, my ass." I snarl, balking at such silly assumptions, "He was the one who said he loved me."
"He may have said it but Temperance, who was the one who knew it?"
"He did." My eyes fall, "He said so."
"Temperance…"
"What? He did!" I defensively lean back, attempting to keep the truth from implanting itself firmly on my face.
"He may have told you that his feelings were more than professional but who risked it all on a whim? For a completely rational person, he is your one weakness… your kryptonite."
"I don't know what that means."
"Sure you do." He smiles, "You know more then you give yourself credit for. You listen to every word that comes from the lips of your partner, cataloguing it without hesitation because in your mind you don't need any more reason then he told you. He would never lie to you and you trust him explicitly so it reasons that you would give up the one thing you spent most of your life clinging to. You're rational in every other state of affairs. For him though you, Temperance, are irrational."
"I did no such thing. You are being absolutely preposterous!" I jerk up and begin to pace, "As a scientist I must stay rational to fulfill my tasks successfully. Becoming irrational would not do much more then hinder my success."
"Then what is it that you so ruefully rushed over here to confide in me when in just a few short hours you would be knocking at my door, tears streaming down your face and completely heartbroken? What was the pressing matter that couldn't wait a mere few hours?" He presses the subject, determined to get his answer.
"I… I want to marry him." My eyes finally lift as my gaze locks his in complete vulnerability, "As irrational as it seems, I have concluded that he has become a necessity in my sanity and work performance. I need him as a permanent affixture in my life."
"And what facilitated the need to tell me this today?" He smiles, trying to get me verbalize the words I have been dancing around for months.
"I passionately love him and well… I know it is customary for the male to ask the father of the female for permission to marry his daughter and well… you are the closest to a father figure he has." The words slowly flow, "I would like your approval to ask him… well… can I ask him?" The words slowly grind out and I hope I don't pass out as reality finally sets in.
"I thought you would never ask." He smiles, "This calls for a drink. More scotch?"