I know I haven't written much of anything in a while, but with school starting back up soon the chapters should be more regular. This and a few of my other stories have half written chapters waiting on my muse. This was one of the more difficult chapters and did go in many different directions before I settled on this so I hope you enjoy it for as it is.
It wasn't as I was lying but as my body slips in and out of reality one fact remains, I am petrified. I love my best friend, the man who above all else has been my rock and salvation when I was nothing more than damaged goods. A man who wants forever when I can only provide a lifetime; a lifetime filled with regret and sorrow. How am I supposed give him forever when I have already given him my life?
"Bones… Bones please…" A familiar plea jolted me from a world of frantic terror, beckoning me back to my reality, "Please… baby… just…"
As my eyes slowly roll open a flood of relief fills the man kneeling down before me as his hands slowly roll off my shoulders. His eyes search mine but soon fall as he slowly leans back, trying to deflect the wall of tension building against my stone cold eyes. Without a seconds notice he drops my body against the cool tile, leaving my body to slightly shake in terror.
"Thanks." He feebly shakes, unable to deny the sincerity in my eyes. "I… I… just thanks for waking up. It would be nearly impossible to break in a new hot anthropologist. Or even to find one…" He trails off, mumbling into his tear stained palms.
My mouth falls open, trying to rational prove the fallacy in his logic but the sorrow rimming around his eyes is much more than my fragile heart can take. I watch as his eyes dance around my body, refusing to lock eyes with mine. The sorrow filling my very soul is much more then I can bare, but as his shoes slide against the tile I know my fate is sealed.
"Booth… please." The words finally fall but it is much too late. The damage has been done. It has been months since he has been mine, if he ever was. And the delicate string that has been holding our partnership together is on the verge of snapping; all because of three small words that hold the weight of the world.
"I'm sorry." I mumble lightly against the void only my partner can fill, "I didn't mean to…"
I try to stop his backtracking but nothing can stop my heart from shattering. The panic flickering across his eyes is just too much as my body shudders and my eyes roll back once more. In a flash I can feel his body instantly, protectively hovering over mine. The heat radiating from his hand cascades across my body, stopping short of my pale checks but that is not enough to keep this fragile heart from stopping.
He is running.
Running as far and fast as his feet will take him. I can feel his heart slip from my firm grasp but the reality of this situation can't stop the truth from flowing from deep within. I must tell him, he must know. If in the end he leaves I will at least know I tried, tried to reach the unobtainable and finally be able to defy all logic and just love.
"Booth…." I rasp, pleading with my mind for just one more heartbeat, one more chance to undo the countless lies I have told him over the years. I love him and whatever happens today, I know I always will.
"Everyone… everyone just back up!" Booth growls as his eyes dart across the vastly increasing crowd, "Now!" And with that everyone scatters, leaving us with the plaguing guilt of a love once lost.
"Bo… Booth… Seeley…" I plead but as the darkness looms overhead I know my calls are fleeting and silent against a rapidly beating heart.
Why can he not hear my calls? Has he fallen so far away that he cannot recognize my voice? The man I once knew would come running without even a word, but here I lay dying of heartbreak and not even the truth could save me now. Was what we once had just one big fantasy of lies and trickery?
"If this is just some sick and twisted game to get me to stay, it isn't funny Temperance." He snarls. I can hear the terror coursing through his words but as my body slowly begins to shut down I know this could be the end.
But the silence just pushes him further toward the ledge of heartbreak and denial.
"Just wake the hell up." His voice is soft and pleading. The tears streaking down his ridged checks finally splatter across my face in a fear he can no longer deny. "Open those eyes… please."
"Booth…" I choke out against the coldness filling my veins and as my world slows and darkens one singular word pulls me back from the pits of my self-created hell.
"Yes."