A/N: I have become my own worst nightmare. I am that person that creates a story and doesn't upload for months. I am sorry and I sacrifice myself on the alter of shame and despair. I have been having life/work problems. It is a bad excuse. So I am going to write this next chapter right now in the upload manager. This is brave for me since I usually work on things for hours at a time. I am a slow typer... Anywho, here goes, for those of you still out there listening. I love you all and keep the reviews coming. Also! I rated this for language and some sexual situations. So far, I haven't had a lemon. This will be this one will have one. I will write the lemon in italics. Skip it if you are a) too young or b) that is not your sort of thing. Don't say I didn't warn you though. I want to try and finish this fic up pretty quickly, so hopefully we will be done at 20. Thank you for sticking with me!

Harry awoke the next morning to the light coming though the tall thin windows of the Gryffindor Common room. He had a brief moment of panic before realizing where he was. Hermione was cuddled up next to him, her neck tilted at a awkward angle. His arm had fallen asleep many hours ago and as he lifted Hermione off of him trying desperately not to disturb her his fingers tingled as the blood flowed back into them. With worry laden eyes, he looked over their carefully laid plans that were haphazardly strewn across the table. Small black an white figures were doing a delicate ballet around Grimwauld place. Everything looked so cut and dry. Last night he had been filled with hope. He had been sure that he would be able to go in with them in a hale of blazing glory. But now, as he realize the truth of the situation.

This would be a battle he had to fight on his own.

With deliberate care, he stood and tip toed across the expanse of the common room, listening to the familiar sounds of Ron's snores fading into the background as he mounted the stairs to the dormitory. Once inside, he closed the door behind him and headed straight for the trunk at the foot of his bed and began to riffle through it with a sense of urgency getting jabbed by various bits of debris that he had collected throughout the years.

"Come on, come on," he whispered. "Ah-ha!" He knew the instant he felt the silky fabric of his father's invisibility cloak, he had to act fast. The others would be up soon. Sirius would be sending him a message soon. If he didn't hurry, there was no way he would be able to get away, he wouldn't be able to face his fate...

"What are you doing?" Hermione's voice rang out from behind him, sharp with anger and accusation.

He took a moment to answer. He had been hoping that she would stay asleep so he could avoid the hardest part of his leaving. Harry knew that greater wizards than he had faced the Dark Lord and fallen. What hope did he really have? At least if he did go, however, his friends and family would be safe for a little bit longer. It was all he could hope for.

"I have to do this. I need to save my mum. Our plans, they won't work and you know it."

"No," she shook her head, tears streaming down her cheeks. "I won't let you."

"It's not your choice."

"Are you blind?" she almost shouted with outrage. "We have a plan! This could work!"

"We both know that's not true. If we all go, you all will die trying to help me and he will kill my Mum for bring you along. Then he will kill me! At least if I go alone, he won't have the chance to get to you! You can move on!"

"You are being irrational! Just let us help you." The vulnerability in the words combined with the tears swimming in her eyes almost broke Harry's resolve.

Harry shot a silencing charm at the door before dropping the cloak and rushing forward to her. "Hermione, I can't risk anyone else for my sake. The reason he has my mum is because of me. I can't give him anything else. I have to end it one way or another."

"Please..." she sobbed into his chest, hating herself for feeling the need to beg him, hating herself for crying. "I love you..."

Instead of answering her, he cupped her cheeks in his hands and framed her face. Losing himself in her big brown eyes for a moment before capturing her lips with his in a fervid kiss. He felt his soul pouring into her as the kiss became harsher and deeper. The urgency to touch er and be touched was like a fire burning through him and melting away all of his fear of the impending fight and his worry of losing. All that mattered was that her hands were working on the buttons of his crisp white shirt.

Breaking the breathless kiss, he fumbled with the knot holding her red dress around her neck. When it was free, he let his kisses trail delightfully over her collar bone, dlighting in her soft moans as he ravenged her silky skin. Her nails dug gently into the tight muscles of his chest, lightly grazing his nipples. he let out a ragged breath and reached back up to kiss her again in desperation. His arousal was straining painfully in his trousers as she reached between them and began to fumble with his belt.

"Hermione...?" he gasped.

She looked up at him with a primal savage look in her eyes.

"Are you sure-" he began, but she cut him off, pressing her lips more firmly to his than before as she succeeded in freeing him from the painful confines of his pants. The feel of him was too much for her to bare. With a quick movement, she wrapped her legs around his waist.

Harry's knees nearly buckled as he felt the warm heat of her center bare against him. Wanting to savor the moment, he tried to trail kisses down her neck. Hermione, however, was not one known for her patience. At times, Harry had found her bossiness to be a bit grating. But as she used her weight to push his full length into her and she demanded, "NOW!" he had never been more turned on in his life.

They looked at each other, shock spreading across their faces as they looked at one another, lust and love and need bruning beneath their expressions. Trying not to trip over his pants that were now pooled around his ankles, he made his way way to the bed, seeing stars as every movement sent sensation roaring into all of the nerves in his body. After an eternity, his legs hit the edge of one of the four poster bed and they both collapsed. Not missing a beat, their bodies began to wrtithe against one another in a dance as old as time.

"Harry!" Hermione shouted, as the heat began to build up in her making her insane with need.

Groaning, Harry felt the sharp pricks of her nails scratching into her back. It was more than he could take. "Oh.. Hermione!" he shouted, thrusting harder than ever before exploding deep with in her. He could feel her constrict around him as she too came to her though it was the most rushed love making he had ever experienced, he had never felt closer to anyone in his life.

For a moment, they simply clung to one another, waiting for their hearts to slow and their breathing to regulate. Neither wanted to break the spell of what had transpired. Neither wanted to believe that it was goodbye.

"Please, Harry," Hermione finally whispered, her voice thick with emotion. "Don't go..."

His throat clenched. "I love you," he whispered against her breast. Never had he meant anything more in his life than he did in that moment.

"No!" she cried out pulling his face back up to hers. Renewed tears were already pooling in her eyes. "Don't do that! Don't say goodbye."

Harry wanted nothing more than to stay with her forever. "I love you more than I ever thought I could love anyone."

Their eyes locked for a moment of intensity. "Then don't go."

He didn't answer. Instead, he reached out his hand and wordlessly called his wand into his hand. Tears began to roll down his cheeks as he a flash of red light shot out of his wand and hit Hermione. Her eyes closed immediately and her breathing slowed. Hugging her for a moment longer, he let his tears roll off of his cheeks. Then, with robotic movements, he pushed away from her stunned form.

Taking great care he redressed her and tucked her safely under the covers of his bed, kissing her forehead gently. Nostalgia flooded him as he looked around the room that had been his safe place for so many years. He remembered talking about quidditch with Ron, studying, playing games of explosing snap, drinking firewhiskey smuggled from the kitchens and finally making desperate love to the woman he had only recently realized was the most amazing person he had ever met.

Throwing on his cloak, Harry turned his back on it all and strode from the room.

As he walked down the seemingly endless corridors of Hogwarts castle, a sliver figure passed by him, racing in the other direction. It was Sirius's potronous. He was calling them down to the main hall. In moments Ron and Kate would wake up to see that he wasn't there. They would find Hermione and figurative alarms would sound as they notified Sirius and his. It wouldn't be long.

Stopping suddenly, Harry turned and walked ten paces back before turning again in front of a stretch of blank wall. In his head, he repeated, "I need a way out of the castle." After his third trip back and forth, he turned to the small wooden door. He pushed it open and taking a deep breath, followed the stone tunnel into the darkness, all the while feeling for when the enchantments that kept the castle secret lifted. Nearly at the end of the sloping tunnel, he felt them vanish only to be replaced with an overwhelming sense of dread.

His gut told him that this was the right path. It felt as if his whole life had been heading toward this one moment. Harry knew that he was making the right decision in leaving his friends and family out of it. This was the way things had to be. Feeling slightly reassured, he took several deep breaths and flourished his wand. A harsh squeezing sensation flooded his body cutting off his senses and disappeared with a loud crack.