A/N: Thank you for your reviews! It seems like none of you can imagine jess fitting into this fic, but I promise you, he will fit into it perfectly, although he won't show up until chapter 4. I hiope you like this chapter, and if you do, please leave a little review.

Chapter 2

For a long time every weekend I was at my father's apartment we just hung out, sometimes together with Laura, sometimes with his friends, and sometimes just the two of us. Today I think it's strange how a 10 year old boy could hang out with an 8 year old girl, but back then I just was extremely happy to have found something like this. When I was with them it was like I had a big and happy family. And that's something every little girls dreams of, right?

When I was about eleven, Dad and Susan decided to move in together. None of the kids did mind. After all we had been best friends for three years now. We were even more than friends. We were siblings. But we didn't fight as much as 'normal' siblings do. We just loved each other. My obsession for "Reel Excitement" had vanished long ago. The posters and cds now occupied a box in my closet, but my obsession for Mark just had grown a lot. His presence didn't intimidate me, but he so often gave me compliments, that I couldn't even talk to him any more, because I would only be able to splutter.

Their house was great. It was in Litchfield, and now I met with Mark and Laura every other day. I even had my own room there, and even if it was smaller than my room at home, it still was great. Although I often spent the night at Mark's or Laura's room or we all slept together in one room. Being so close to each other was special and Dad and Susan were ok with it, after all, we were all only kids.

At Mark's fourteenth birthday everything became different. At first he didn't officially invite me to his party. Of course I came anyway, since it was at the weekend I spent at their place, but I still wondered about it. We never got each other anything. I still don't know why, but I guess it just wasn't necessary. We didn't have to get each other present to know how much we cared. It was self-evident.

But at this weekend something was different. Ark still talked to me, but he didn't hug me, when I first saw him that weekend, he didn't ask me to help with the preparations for the party and he also didn't ask me to choose some music. Before that he had always trusted my music taste.

I went to Laura's room, something had to be wrong. As usual, I didn't knock and just opened the door.

"Hey Laura! Any idea what's wrong with Mark?" She was sitting in front of her mirror, finishing her make-up. It was senseless to tell her she was only ten and shouldn't be wearing make-up, we all knew that.

"Hey sis! What should be wrong with him, has he said anything mean to you?"

"No, he doesn't talk that much to me at all. It is like he's avoiding me." I sat down on her bed and shifted uncomfortably.

"Sorry, I really have no idea." She looked at me through the mirror.

"Never mind. So, are you going down for the party?"

"Yeah, in a couple of minutes, but I don't think I will stay long. Mark doesn't want his baby sister on his bad boy party too long" Laura rolled her eyes.

"I'm sure you're next Birthday Party will be a Bad girl party!" I said laughing.

"Well, it's my calling to be a bad girl, you now that!"

"Sometimes I really think you're forgetting that you are ten years old."

"No, although I want to forget it."

I smiled at Laura sympathetic. "Well, I'm going downstairs. See you later!"

"Yeah, see you!"

I went downstairs, the party was in the garden, although it was autumn already it was still warm. When I went out onto the patio I immediately saw her. Blond, with green eyes, slim and cute. I had seen her before, when I was hanging out with Mark and his friends, but this time it was different. This girl was clinging to Mark's arm, smiling at him all the time. I think her name was Mandy, or Mindy, or something like that. At first I didn't feel anything. But then I became really jealous. Of course, back then I didn't know that feeling. I just felt the sudden pain in my stomach and the desire to throw up immediately. All I could do was going back into the house really quickly, but not quickly enough. I only managed to get to the nearest couch. Of course he had noticed me. And of course he came after me.

"Hey Rory, what's wrong?" He asked. What a question. He had been avoiding me the whole time because of her, and now he was asking me what's wrong. It made me want to vomit even more.

"Nothing, what should be wrong?" I asked in a tone that can only be described as bitchy as possible. He noticed, of course he noticed. Damn him for knowing me so well. He made me look up at him. I know I had tears in my eyes.

He looked down for a moment and then took my hand in his.

"I wanted to tell you about her. I really wanted to, but I didn't know when would be the right time, so I kept avoiding you. I know it was wrong not to tell you, I'm really sorry!" He sounded completely sincere, and it made me feel so bad. He denied it so much, and there I was, snapping at him. But I wasn't able to react differently.

"Well, why should you tell me. I mean, I'm only your sister, nothing more, right?"

When he didn't answer I stood up and headed for the stairs. "Say hi to Barbie for me." was all I managed to get out before I ran upstairs and shut myself in my room.

What I didn't hear, was Mark, who was still in front of the couch quietly saying "You know you're more than that"

All I could do was cry. Back then I didn't even know why. I couldn't have a crush on my brother. That would be so…, icky. Of course, he wasn't my brother, not even my step-brother, but we had known each other for too long now to be just friends. It was just too weird.

After that weekend I didn't visit my father for about three months. I just couldn't face Mark. Every time I came up with another excuse, sometimes it was school, or birthday I had to attend, or I had something planned with Lane. Mum just raised her eyebrows when she heard my lame excuses, but she didn't ask me about any thing. Today I know she wanted me to come to her, and it was possibly the best thing she could have done.

It was shortly before Christmas, when Dad invited me to celebrate New Year's Eve with them. But I just wasn't ready yet. I didn't want to see Mark, it would be so humiliating after what had happened at his birthday.

A few days after Dad's call Laura called me.

After talking about random things she finally asked me why I wasn't coming to Thanksgiving.

"You won't understand it." Was all I said.

"Yeah, I would. I might not be as mature as you are, but I'm definitely more mature than Mark!" There he was again, like he was tracking me.

"Sorry sis, but I can't tell you, maybe at some time, but not now." I still wasn't able to tell her, not even today. Although I know she knows everything what ever happened between me and Mark, I can't talk to her about it.

"But please, please, please, come to New Year's Eve. Mum and Chris are having a big party in the Garden, a lot of people will be there, but we're short of kids. I don't want to fall asleep before midnight because it's so boring." Laura really knew how to persuade people.

"I thought bad girls don't beg!"

"This is the exception. If they want someone to come over they are allowed to beg."

"That's the worst argument I've ever heard!"

"But you are coming, right?"

"Yeah, I'm coming." I sighed. I knew it would be hard to face him again.

But when I arrived at Dad's I found out all the excitement had been for nothing, since Mark was celebrating with his friends and his girlfriend's house. When Susan told me that, I felt the feeling coming back, I had when I first had seen the two of them together. Susan was going on and on how she loved Mandy and how Mark was behaving so nice when he was around her. I put on a fake smile and went to my room, otherwise I would have thrown up right there. At least I wouldn't have to see him.

The party really was totally boring. The only kid's that were there, except for Laura and me, were some babies, which were, either asleep or crying the whole time. Laura and I were sitting in the back of the Garden, when suddenly we saw Mark coming out onto the patio. He went to his mother and said something to her, I didn't know what, but after he was finished Susan hugged him real tight and looked at him sympathetically. He brushed her off, looking a little embarrassed, and then went onto the grass. That was the time he saw me. His body immediately stiffened and he looked like he didn't know if he should approach me or not. Next to me, Laura was babbling about something, but I didn't really listen.

"Hey, would you get us something to drink?" I asked her, still looking at Mark. Laura followed my look and raised her eyebrows questioning. I looked at her, my eyes pleading. "Please!"

"Ok, sure", she said unsure, but she got the message that she shouldn't come back for a couple of minutes.

When Laura stood up, Mark came closer to the bank I was sitting on. When he passed Laura, he stumbled a little bit, but eventually he sat down next to me.

"Hey" he only said, staring at his shoes.

"How's Barbie?" I know it was mean, but I couldn't control myself.

"Why are you so jealous?" I couldn't believe he was so blunt.

"I'm not!"

"Of course you are. I mean, I always knew that you had different feelings for me than you normally have for a brother, but I thought this would be over when I finally had a girlfriend."

"You can have as many girlfriends as you want, I don't care!" I stood up, I just wanted to get away from him, but he pulled me back on the bank.

"I missed you.", was all he said. It made me blush, like every time when he said nice things to me.

"Why did you miss me when you have Barbie?" I asked meek.

"Stop calling her Barbie, her name is Mandy. And I missed you because you are my little Rory." Before that he always had referred to me as his sister, but not at this night, this night I was his Rory.

"Do you still need your little Rory, when you have..Mandy?"

"Of course I do! You're my best friend! And I care about you, you know that!" He looked at his watch. "Come on, it's almost midnight!" Mark pulled me up and went to the pavilion in the back of the garden, pulling me with him. The pavilion was small, and you would almost miss it if you didn't know where it was. You couldn't see it from the patio, or any other part of the grade, until you stand right in front if it. There was a small table in the middle, and some comfortable chairs, with light green cushions around it.

"What are you doing?", I asked him excited. I didn't really want to know. He had captured me, my mind, everything. Whatever he would do now, I wouldn't protest, I wouldn't say anything against it, I just didn't care. It was just the two of us, in this small pavilion. Nothing else mattered. I heard the people on the patio shouting. "10…9…8..7..6…5..4..3..2..1.. Happy New Year!"

Mark had taken my hands in his and looked me in the eyes. I knew what would happen. I had seen it in movies, I had read about it, but nothing could ever compare to the real thing. He lowered his head and we closed our eyes. I felt his breath on my lips, and shortly before his lips met mine I still couldn't believe this would be happening. My first kiss. I had dreamed of it, and my dreams hadn't been a lot different from the real thing. It was totally romantic, even today I think it was the perfect first kiss. From this moment on everything was different.. We couldn't be brother and sister anymore, but we also couldn't be together. We didn't know what we actually could be, but at this moment neither of us cared, this moment was about us, and about nobody else.