When I opened my eyes,I found myself lying on a hospital bed. I raised my hands and found various vessel connected to it. Then, I heard a voice " You awake? "

I turned and saw that it was Kanda "Now how could you be okay with every bone broken in your body? "
He shrugged "I'm stronger than most people. " I chuckled and tried to sit up when an agonizing pain from my shoulder sent me collapsing on to the bed,sweating and panting from the pain.
" Be careful. The Earl sent his sword right between your shoulder blades. You won't be able to move for some time. "

" Got the hint. " I muttered in pain as I put my hand on the shoulder. Suddenly,my stomach felt empty. I looked at the calendar and saw that it has been 8 days I've been out. "The Innocence? " I turned to Kanda.

" Luckily,The Earl didn't bother to see if I was alive. It was hidden under my clothes. " He said. I sighed with relief when I knew that the Innocence was saved. I closed my eyes and relax a little until I smell the sweet scent of porridge. I opened one of my eyes and saw that Kanda left and Lenalee came in with a hot bowl of porridge. " I see that you're awake. " Lenalee said as she put the bowl beside me.

" Sorry if I have to trouble you guys. "

" It's alright. Before the medical team arrived,Kanda was stopping the blood flow from your wound. He's been sitting here the whole time,waiting for you to wake up. " she said and blew a little on the spoonful of porridge "Open up. " she said as she fed me the porridge. Being unable to move was very troublesome. My shoulder was going to heal at about two weeks or so. In the meantime,I have to be fed like a two-year old. Kanda constantly came to chat. When Allen comes,it was a fight-o-marathon,resulting in the head nurse kicking them out. When I could move,I always go to the zen garden to meditate,in order to relax my mind and quicken my shoulder's healing.

Two weeks passed and my shoulder was fully healed. A new joint was inserted to replace the old one. There was a long slash scar on the spot,always reminding me of my failure. But I can't stop here. My goal was to find her. I tied the ribbon securing my hood and went to the canteen for some food. I missed Jeryy's BaoBing. As I opened the door,a surprise was unfolded. Everyone was decorating the canteen. A banner that wrote 'Congrats on your first mission,Xue Hwa! ' explained it all. On the table was various foods. And of course,BaoBing. Everyone froze when they saw me. Guess it should've been a surprise. I caught a glimpse of Kanda drawing a snow flower beside my name and chuckled a little when he almost fell off the ladder. Jeryy slides in with his pan "X-X-Xue Hwa! What are you doing here?! " I smiled and took his chopsticks from him and tasted the noodles he was cooking. " I came here for a snack. Turns out it'll be a feast. " With that,everyone cheered and partied. I waited for Kanda to climb down from the ladder and snatched the paintbrush from his hand.

"Oi,oi! Give that back! "

" Give me your arm. "

" Why would I- "

" Give it. "

He grunted. " Fine. " and took out his arm. I find a spot on the smooth skin and painted two snowflowers on it. Kanda was giggling a little since the paintbrush was tickling his skin. It was the first time I've seen his face like this. When I finish,he looked at me and asked "What's this for?"

" As a token of our friendship. " I smiled and showed him the snowflower I painted on my own arm. He blushed a little and stroded off. I tilted my head in confusion. Was he still sick? The party went on for maybe 3 hours or so. When almost everyone is in bed,I was tossing and turning in bed. Whenever I closed my eyes,I could see her. At one point,I couldn't take it and went to the zen garden,my favorite place in the order. There,I saw that Kanda was also meditating. I went over and sat beside him legs crossed and eyes closed. His voice rang " Hard time sleeping? "

" Bad memories "

"About? " Talking to him always seem to be the remedy for me to calm down.

"A... relative. "

"Relative? "

" ... My sister. "

" You have a sister? "

" Had. I don't even know if I'll ever see her. "

" What happened? " I opened my eyes as if closing them was tiring. I looked at my hands and tears gathered

"The Millennium Earl. He slaughtered my parents and turned them into Akuma. But that wasn't all... He took her. I don't even know if she's alive or dead... I just... I didn't know what to do... " I covered my face and sobbed. Suddenly, I felt the warmth of a body covering me. The scent of lotus flower filled my lungs as I held his arms.

"Kan- "

" It's funny you know. No matter how much I try,I still can't get you out of my mind. "

" ..." This time I felt my whole body getting warmer. Is this what they call love?

" You're always so happy. And this snowflower... " He said as he showed it to me " I love it. Like I love you. " I could feel tears rolling down my cheeks. He quickly retracted himself.

" No one told me that before... The village kids said that I'm a monster... I was always hiding in the woods... " I sobbed as I wrapped my arms around him. I burrowed my face into his chest as his hands landed on my back. How long? How long it was for me to finally be accepted. 16 years. Now there was a person cherishing me. I cried out of happiness as his hands soothed me on my back. I fell asleep due to exhaustion and when I was falling into a deep blackness, I felt myself being lifted and carried to a bed. The last thing I remembered was the familiar smell of lotus flower and the clicking of a door.

When I opened my eyes,I found myself not in my room but his. A container filled with oil had a lotus flower submerged in it and on top was a string burning the essence. I heard his voice and found him in a robe. He was coming back from a bath.
" Morning. "

" Morning. "

" You fell asleep yesterday. I... carried you here. " He said as blushes as he hand me a glass of water. I sat up and drank it. Despite the fact that he was cold towards other people,he is also kind and considerate. As I put the empty glass on the table, I stood up and kissed his forehead. My lips felt warm as his face flare up.
" Thank you. " I said and went back into my room. Since it was just next door,I didn't have to strain my energy. I closed the door and immediately collapsed on the floor. What is this feeling? I grabbed the shirt where my heart is. My heart feels like it's being squeezed. Was this what Mama felt when she met Papa? Love? Even if it felt weird,I feel happy. A new form of happy. I feel... wonderful. This is what love feels like. This is what being loved was like. I stared at the room and smiled. I love Kanda.

*Fangirl squueeee!
Yes the chapter is done! I know its very short and it took a long time,but I have ANOTHER surprise! Yes,another pairing! Lavi and ?. I'm not telling you~ It's thanks to a particular person so that I could find this idea. And to all the readers out there,thank you for your support!