Disclaimer: I do not own anything below, save the character known as the first-person, and anything he screws up. If it's not owned by StarFox and its holders, then XxSanitariumxX gets the credit. And you should check out his stories if you haven't already.
I watched Lana finish up her run with nearly as much apprehension as Relics. Not for the same reasons, but seeing her get hit in the face would not make my day. And once she got through the "surprise" at the end of the course, I was glad it was over. And I wasn't just talking about the Fun Zone; this period was the last one of the day, and I'd had about enough of the first day of high school. Once Lana got to the end of the course, she did something that most of the others wouldn't have guessed.
"Relics..." she said, looking right at the camera. Now, how'd she find it? I wondered. "I...I was wondering...If you'd like to –" she began, but the bell rang, drowning out her words. Once she could be heard again, she was saying, "...see you in a bit for your answer, then."
I immediately left the classroom, unconcerned with Lana and Relics' relationship. I didn't really want a part of the drama that was about to unfold. Well, Relics got his date. On the first day of high school. And I haven't formed any black holes, so...I let the disasters averted counter jump up one more. I realized that I was probably overreacting with the whole "destroy the universe" idea; even if I made the future Relics meet his current-day self, I doubted whether anything bad would really happen.
Before I could get out of the B building, the translator on my arm started ringing. It startled me, so I held it away from myself for a second, before trying to figure out how to answer the...whatever it was. I didn't even know this thing could call people, I thought. I pressed a button, and the ringing stopped, but I wasn't sure what I'd done, since no text appeared on its small screen, and no hologram turned on.
"Hello?" I asked, hoping I didn't look like an idiot.
"Hey, Ditto," Joanne's voice came out. "I just wanted to know how your day went."
"How did you even know school was out?" I asked. I was beginning to wonder whether there was such a thing as caring too much.
"Katherine's been going there for three years, dear," she said. I heard a snicker nearby, and managed to silence it with just a stare.
"It went fine," I said.
"Oh, okay. Well, I'm out front, waiting for Katherine and Michael, so if you want a ride home, I can take you."
I thought about the offer for a bit. I mean, I had no real idea where Eli or Krystal lived, and since we we'd only been friends for a day or so, I figured it'd be weird to ask either one if they wanted to hang out for a while. Still, going back home and doing nothing for the next few hours didn't seem interesting. "Can I get back to you in a minute?" I asked.
"Sure. They aren't here yet, so I'll leave in five, okay?"
"Okay," I said, wondering for a moment whether the avian Cornerians could just fly home.
"Okay, I'll see you then. Lo-" she began, but I ended the call a second early, having assumed she'd been finished talking. "Love you"? She really thinks I'm one of hers now, doesn't she? Next thing I know, she'll be saying Mike's my brother.
"Okay, now how does this thing make calls?" I asked. "More importantly, why didn't Colin show me?!" My outburst attracted a little attention, including that of Eli, who had just come out of a nearby room.
"Hey, Ditto, what's going on?"
"How does this thing make calls?" I asked, holding up the device. "I thought it was just a translator."
"A translator's just a communicator that's more focused on translating," he said, grabbing the device. Without removing it, he pressed what I thought was a pretty well-hidden button, and a little flap popped open, with a lot of tiny buttons underneath. "Just do that, and enter a number or a name. You can send texts, too, but to open a text on this, you have to use a hologram. It won't be private."
"Or, it wouldn't, if I could read Cornerian," I said.
"Yeah. Oh, yeah, and your girlfriend left a little while before me. You could probably catch up if you wanted."
"She's not my girlfriend," I said, still inspecting the device on my arm. I flipped the flap open and shut a few times, just to memorize how it was done.
"What are you talking about?" he asked. "I saw you in fifth period. You two were all over each other."
"That's..." I began. True, we'd done most of our talking in that class silently, since I was getting more used to it. I can't very well tell him that she's telepathic, can I? At least, not without her permission. "...nothing but a little contact," I finished.
"Oh, it was more than a little contact," he said. "Dude, she couldn't keep her hands off of you."
"You don't know what you're talking about," I said. I would know, being the one who read her mind, I added silently.
"Yeah, sure I don't. But look who's waiting by the door for you," he said. I glanced up, and sure enough, there was Krystal. I tried to ignore his comments as we came closer to the door.
"Hi," I said. Eli snickered, but I continued to ignore him.
"Hi," she replied, starting to walk beside me.
"Oh, would you look at the time?" Eli asked. "Looks like I've got to go home and do...stuff."
"Wait, Eli," Krystal called. "I was waiting for you both."
Oh, thank goodness, I thought. Awkward situation avoided.
"All I wanted to see was if either of you wanted –"
"Ditto!" someone shouted from the building I'd just left.
"Is that Relics running toward us?" Eli asked as we both turned toward the voice. I nodded.
"Ditto!" Relics shouted again, drawing close. "I think I messed up."
"And you're coming to me for help?" I asked.
"You're the only human here."
"Okay, alright. What did you do?"
"I think I just asked Lana out on a date," he said, staring wide-eyed at me. Apparently the admission wasn't all that easy.
"What?" I asked, hiding the fact that I knew full well what'd happened. "I thought you hated Cornerians."
He looked around at all of those present, and then back at me. "I do not."
"Then why exactly are you freaking out?"
"What am I supposed to do?"
"Oh, I don't know. You could go out with her. You did ask, after all."
"I did not ask. She asked me, and I said yes –"
"Why say yes, and then regret that you said yes?" Eli asked.
"I didn't know what she'd asked. I said yes because I thought she was asking...look, it doesn't matter. You've got to help me."
"Help you what?" I asked with a smirk. "Break her heart?"
"No, no, no! I don't want to hurt her. I just don't know if I can..."
"Look, Relics, just take it easy. Just go on the date, okay?"
"What?!" both he and Eli asked loudly.
"Why not?" I asked. "It's not like she's got the plague."
"But he's...and she's a..." Eli stuttered.
"I don't know," Relics said, looking away.
"I agree with Ditto," Krystal said. "But if it makes you too nervous, Ditto and I will go with you."
This time it was my turn to freak out. "What?!" I asked, spinning toward her. Is this some weird way of asking me out?
"Look, it'll be fine," she continued. "It's not like we're going on a date. You can back up Relics, and I can keep Lana calm."
"Do you even know her?" Eli asked. Krystal tilted her head in thought for a moment, then shook her head.
"Why not take Eli?" I asked. The feathers along the top of Eli's head stood up, and he looked at me in surprise.
"I barely know him," Krystal answered. "I'd wanted to ask if we could hang out, anyway."
"A date isn't really 'hanging out'," I said.
"No, no, it's fine," Relics said. I turned toward him as he started to walk away. I glanced at Krystal, who stared knowingly at me before nodding toward him. I sighed in resignation and caught up with him.
"Wait, wait, wait, Relics. Look, if you really want me to, I'll go with you."
"Nah, I...it'd be awkward for everyone..."
"Any more awkward than otherwise?" I asked. He looked like he was considering it, and I glanced back at Krystal. She was already making her way off of the school grounds, apparently headed home. "I'll be right back," I said, jogging to her.
"How'd it go?" she asked when I came up beside her.
"Still figuring that out. And you owe me for this, by the way."
"What? How so?"
"Not now. I need to know where...someone can pick you up. I don't know where you live..."
"Oh," she said. "Did he tell you what time to be ready?"
"No," I replied. "He still hasn't agreed to pick me up."
"Okay, then let's ask," she said, walking toward Relics, who was waiting near a black SUV in front of the school. We'd hardly gotten off of the school's grounds, so he wasn't too far away.
"Hey, Relics," I panted. I need to get into better shape, I thought. "Thought about it yet?"
"Well, it's not like I can get out of going..." he said.
"Going?" a fairly large German Sheppard asked. I couldn't quite remember his name; it had been a week since it was even possible to read the story. "Going where?"
"He's got a date," Krystal said.
"A date?" he asked Relics. "With who? That minx you were walkin' with earlier?"
"When did you see –" I began.
"Oh ho, ho, ho, ho, ho," he laughed.
"It's not really all that funny," I said. I was ignored again.
"Be sure to bring her flowers, and ask before you kiss her."
"I'm not going to kiss her!" Relics practically shouted. His face began to gain some color.
"Whatever you say, sir," the German Sheppard said, opening the car's door for Relics. He didn't know why Krystal and I were even there. "What time's she expecting to be picked up?"
"A-actually, she said she was picking me up –"
"Ohh..." he groaned. "This won't do, not at all."
"Yeah," Krystal said, "Don't you know that the man picks up the woman?"
"Does she even know where you live?" the dog asked.
"No..." Relics began.
"Call her," I suggested. This interchange was already becoming boring for me. Besides, I needed to try to figure out if it was too late to get the timeline un-screwed.
"You can call her?" the dog asked.
"Yeah, I have her –" Relics began, pulling out the card she'd given him earlier. The dog shut the car door and took the card right out of Relics' hand before taking him by the arm and beginning to dial her number. I noticed Joanne's car parked nearby, and she was standing next to it. She motioned toward it questioningly, and I shook my head.
"What are you doing?" Krystal asked Jason.
"Relics needs to fix his little mistake," he said before he finished dialing.
"You're sure about this?" Relics asked.
"Absolutely!" the dog said.
"This is a good idea, right?" Krystal asked. I hadn't even noticed her hand brushing the back of mine.
"They need to go on their date, yeah. But I still don't know why you made me come along."
"You could've said –" she began, when Relics' communicator stopped ringing.
"Hello?" came Lana's voice.
"Hello, Lana?" Relics asked.
"Speaking," she replied.
"Ask her; ask her if she's busy," the dog whispered. He looked too much like a child excited about something.
Relics shook his head. "Hey, it's me, Relics. Are you busy at the moment?"
"Oh, Relics!" she said excitedly. "I didn't know it was you."
"I'm feeling like we're intruding on a private conversation," I thought. I glanced down a moment after that, though, and realized that Krystal had broken the contact. But she subtly leaned toward me and made contact once more.
"What makes you think that?" she asked.
"You heard me?" I asked.
"Yeah. Telepath. I thought you were used to it by now."
"I'm trying to be, but you said that you couldn't read my mind without contact."
"I never said that. I said it was harder."
I glanced suspiciously at her, but she only giggled.
"You were saying?" she asked.
"I said it feels like this is a private conversation. I mean, he's talking on the phone, for crying out loud."
"Just do it!" the dog shouted, unknowingly interrupting our conversation.
"Relics?" Lana asked. "Who was that?"
"No one," Relics said, scowling at the dog. "Just someone who was dropped on his head a few too many times as a child."
"Oh, I see," Lana giggled. "Well, I'll see you at eight! Bye."
"Ask her –" the dog tried.
"She hung up," Relics interrupted.
"Damn," the dog said, looking down.
I cleared my throat to get their attention. They both looked at me, and I let out an out-of-place "Hi."
"Who are these two?" the dog asked.
"Oh, right. Jason, this is Ditto and..." he began, but he didn't know Krystal yet.
"Krystal," she said.
"Right. Krystal, Ditto, this is Jason, my chauffer."
"It's good to meet you," Krystal said.
"And you," he replied with a nod, before looking over at me. "Didn't know they were sending another human."
"They didn't," Relics said. "Ditto's here on his own expense."
Yeah, my own expense, I thought. That's why I'm broke.
"Hmm..." Jason said. "I'll buy it. But what do you two want?"
"We wanted to go with Relics and Lana," Krystal said.
"Oh, you're the extra people Relics mentioned. Shoulda known."
"Relics mentioned us?" I asked. Both Relics and Jason nodded. I guess I was distracted.
"So, you got formal clothes?" Jason asked.
"It won't be formal," Relics said.
"Oh ho, ho, yes it will," Jason replied. "You're going to do anything you can to make it a night she'll never forget."
"Then why are we going?" I asked. "It'd be more special if it was just those two."
"Why?" Krystal asked, "You want me all to yourself?"
I took in a sharp breath and backed away slowly, getting redder by the second. "No, it's not that...I j-just wanted to...uh...to let them have their...date."
"Oh, no you don't," Relics said. "If I'm not getting out of this, you're not getting out of this."
"But I...uh...don't have any formal clothes. That's it, no formal clothes, so I wouldn't fit in."
"So? We've got all afternoon. I can take you to the store," Jason offered.
"I also have no money," I explained.
"Then Relics'll lend you a suit."
"Well, what if –" I began.
"Relax," Krystal said, brushing against my hand again. Jason took notice, and clearly thought something other than the truth.
"Soon you won't be able to separate those two," he said under his breath.
Krystal continued, "I'll be there the whole time. Remember, we're not going on a date. We're going to, as you put it, 'make sure the universe doesn't break' or something."
"I think it's too late for that."
"Well, what're we waiting for?" Jason asked. "I can take you home, young lady, and then we'll leave Ditto here with Relics so they can get ready for their dates."
"Okay," Krystal said, moving to the vehicle. Jason opened the door and bowed with a flourish, and she thanked him and got in. I took a step toward toe SUV, but Relics stopped me.
"Hey, just a heads-up; Jason drives like a maniac. Even for a Cornerian."
"So, you're telling me we could die?" I asked sarcastically. He shook his head reassuringly.
"Come on, hurry up! You three have dates to get to!" Jason shouted. Relics let me sit in the back next to Krystal, and took the passenger seat himself. Once I sat down, Krystal turned toward me.
"What did Relics say?" she asked.
"Buckle up."
Okay, so this IS a new chapter, despite my lack of Beta Readers. Which reminds me; while I'm not sure if I can ask for a Beta reader in the Author's Notes, I'd like to. If you want to help, or you just don't want to see another chapter this bad (if that's your opinion), then feel free to PM me. My only warning is that I'm impatient, so I might put up the chapter before you can review it and get back to me. But that's why there's such a thing as editing.
Also, I edited everything today (3/13/2013), and while I didn't change that much of the earlier chapters, I made a few distinctions. For one thing, the first-person is no longer just me. He can grow and learn things that I can't learn, especially since he's on a school on another planet. He is still of a limited first-person viewpoint, and I can't make him learn anything I know, such as information about Krystal's home planet, which is why he doesn't know anything about it. That also means that he won't know what to expect if Exchange Student finishes while he's in there, or if he jacks up the storyline.
Number 2, I'm giving a lot of credit to XxSanitariumxX. If you haven't read Exchange Student, you definitely should, so that I don't spoil that story for you.