Chapter 4: The Call to Arms

After leaving his office, Kabuto went lower into the subterranean base, this time wearing the orange robe of a high-ranking Yu ninja. The other medics and nurses greeted him as Dr. Yakushi, and he smiled and waved back, occasionally offering diagnostic advice and discussing the merits of this or that anaesthetic. God, he hated these people.

Another three floors down was the office of the actual Head Jōnin. Originally, the position had been called Yukage, but the title of Shadow was now reserved for the heads of the five largest villages. Only those that sought to join their ranks dared to use titles such as Hoshikage or Otokage. Yugakure, however, was meant to stay out of the limelight, and so the greatest ninja of the village laboured in relative obscurity.

Here, there were sweeping arches supporting much larger ceilings. Walls of pink crystal supported grandiose motifs. At the far end, above a small desk manned by one person, was a frieze of a massive tree. In the branches were two monkeys, one holding a ball of fire and the other a sword. In the tree's roots, a snake coiled around the trunk.

Kabuto approached the desk. Behind it, a young boy with magenta eyes and a mane of green hair was hunched over a pile of paperwork. Every few seconds, a rat would dart from behind a wall or out of a nearby corridor, drop a bunched piece of paper into the pile, and depart once more.

"Yūkimaru," he called, drawing the secretary's attention. The boy looked up, and, seeing Kabuto, his face broke into a wide grin.

"Kabuto!" he exclaimed childishly, "what are you doing here?!"

"Oh, I was just passing by and I decided to visit the Head Jōnin of the village," he said nonchalantly. "May I make an appointment?"

Yūkimari glanced down at the paperwork on his desk. He grabbed a bundle of documents bound by a paperclip, scanned the title, and promptly ripped them in half.

"Go right on in!" he said, beaming.

Thanking him unsincerely, Kabuto walked around the desk and into the office of the leader of Yugakure. It was actually rather unimpressive compared to the rest of the building, being small with wooden paneling and an oil lamp on a writing desk. Kabuto guessed that her official visitors were mostly greeted in the foyer by Yūkimaru.

"Hello, Guren," he said to the blue-haired woman. The kunoichi looked back, smiling slightly in spite of what his presence meant.

"Doctor Yakushi, what a rare pleasure it is to have you in town," she deadpanned. "I take it you aren't here for the Festival of Scarlet?"

"Alas, much as I would love to see children disembowled for my own amusement, I can do that on my own," he said with faux regretfulness.

"Indeed. In Oto, we call that Tuesday," Guren replied. "Tell me, what will you be needing for our next ambitious endeavour?"

"People, mostly," Kabuto answered. "Yourself, obviously, along with Misumi Tsurugi and Yoroi Akadō. Are there any other ninja you can spare for the invasion effort?"

"My daughter is able to use Shōton, but she's only four," Guren reasoned. "Yūkimaru is staying here to run the village, and my best jōnin are otherwise occupied as spies and the like. The best I can give you is a few chūnin, although I was hoping to tighten security around the festival this year."

"Eh, what's a civilian here or there in the grand scale of Lord Orochimaru's goal?" Kabuto asked slyly. Guren planted her face in her palm, her orange robe swishing with the motion.

"Very well. That'll be one jōnin, sixteen chūnin, and two genin who really should have been promoted years ago," she said sulkily. "Suishō Bunshin no jutsu."

Two bright green copies of Guren materialized behind her, made at first of jade but slowly gaining her features until they were indistinguishable from the original.

"You, get Yoroi and Misumi. Send them to..."

"The Bleeding Heart," Kabuto supplied. "Room 105. There's a kunoichi covered in bandages in there. Break down the door if she doesn't let you in."

Guren rolled her eyes and pointed at the other clone. "You, go out there and have Yūkimaru give you a list of off-duty chūnin. Then, issue them a B-rank mission to go to Otogakure and wait for further instructions from Lord Orochimaru."

"You're throwing them into a war for only a few thousand ryō? For shame," Kabuto chastised. "As proud ninja of Yugakure, they should be going for free."

"Make a note to double their pay when they come back," Guren soldiered on, ignoring him. The jade clones nodded and disappeared in twin puffs of smoke, though Kabuto could hear one reappear only a few meters away at Yūkimaru's desk. They spoke for a bit, before the clone vanished again.

"You have to come too, you know," Kabuto said. "Get your affairs in order, we need to be in Sound by afternoon tomorrow. Bring your old uniform."

"That old thing?" she groused. "But it's ugly! The green and the purple, ugh! And that stupid rope sash in the middle is ridiculous."

"We're getting rid of the rope," Kabuto informed her. "It seems that the addition of the oversized belt was specifically to ensure nobody took us seriously. Otogakure will be changing its official uniform to something with a bit more camouflage... after the invasion."

"Sometimes, Lord Orochimaru is impossible to understand," Guren muttered. "I'll see you in Oto, Kabuto Yakushi. Now get out of my office, you stink of blood and arrogance."

.:.

One of Oto's most important buildings was The Stack. Administrators worked in various offices around the village, and prisoners were held in jails adjoining the numerous laboratories studding the village, but The Stack was the place where shinobi went to do Orochimaru's bidding. The chūnin and jōnin lounges were there, as was the mission board, a few methods of long-distance communication (including a new method involving linked genjutsu and human sacrifice), and areas for jōnin-sensei to teach their genin. The makings of an Academy were being constructed on the first two floors, though it was low priority due to the lack of applicants.

In a small, drab room on the third floor, Dosu and Kin sat around a table waiting for their sensei to come back. The scroll with Kurotsuchi sealed inside lay innocuously on the table, its small size belying the weight of a teenage girl lying within. The door opened, and Zaku came back from the bathroom.

"The moon is full tonight," Dosu said immediately. Kin reached around and smacked him in the back of the head.

"Idiot! He just went to the bathroom!"

"Well, here I am, yeah," Zaku mumbled. "When's sensei gonna be here? I'm hungry."

"I think– wait a minute, didn't you just eat before we came here?"

"Well, I'm hungry again," Zaku said petulantly.

"You just ate an entire fucking lamb leg!" Kin yelled. "How hungry can you possibly be?"

"Hungry enough to eat your cooking..."

"You just keep going, huh," Dosu commented absently.

"YOU BASTARD!" Kin roared, rearing back and punching Zaku in the chest. The Oto genin didn't even flinch, but his form wavered to reveal a smug looking man who'd been using a henge. He smiled superiorly, catching Kin's fist in his hand.

"You should've listened to Dosu," Kidōmaru said with mock sadness. "What would you do if I was a spy from Konoha or Kumo? For shame! I thought you were better players than that."

"What did you do with Zaku?" Dosu asked nervously.

Kidōmaru grinned and waved his hand, dispelling a genjutsu. Just outside the open door, the wall shimmered to reveal Zaku, limbs spread like a skydiver and upside-down. A few patches of sticky golden goop held him to the wall, with an extra one sealing his mouth shut, and he was shooting a death glare at his jōnin-sensei.

Just then, Tayuya walked by. She paused in front of Zaku, looking the trapped genin up and down. The genjutsu master snickered and walked away, leaving Zaku bright red and looking murderous.

"He failed the skill challenge to evade a bored jōnin-sensei," Kidōmaru said flatly. "So did you, actually. Dosu gets part marks for trying, but I know that code too. For being the greatest failure, we will be passing Zaku on to Lord Orochimaru for his next experiment. Now, on to business. Do you have the target, or do I need to cut Zaku down?"

Kin pointed at the scroll on the table. Kidōmaru opened his mouth, and a stream of webbing caught it and yanked it into his hand.

"Good job," he said fondly. "You've taken out a mid-level boss without taking any damage. You're overpowered, but you're still in the first world. Therefore, all three of you have the chance to level up soon. We're going to the chūnin exams in Konoha."

"YES!" Dosu shouted, accompanied by the inverted Zaku grunting ecstatically through his gag.

"Oh, and we're going to be overthrowing the local government while we're there," Kidōmaru added as an afterthought. "It might make getting a promotion a bit harder, but it looks pretty good on your resumé."

.:.

Orochimaru ruled Otogakure with an iron fist from a throne room set into a hillside, but he lived in his study. The instant he arrived in the enclosed room, he fell to his knees and vomited. The disgusting gastric liquid seeped into his luxurious carpeting, and he moaned a string of vile curses before hurling again. Knees weak, he forced himself to stand up, but immediately felt dizzy and fell down again.

This body was doomed. It had once belonged to Shiore, a shinobi from Kusagakure who happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, and now it was his. That was nearly three years ago, and a shadow clone had taken his place on the team. Shiore's jōnin-sensei probably wondered why he hadn't taken a direct hit in so long, but allowing it to be dispelled was too risky. The stress of holding himself together was finally taking its toll.

He needed a new body.

Orochimaru opened his mouth again, this time far wider than it should be able to. Tobirama Senju's trunk fell into the puddle of stomach acid, and the tip of the Kusanagi began to emerge before he forced his mouth shut again. Hastily shoving the cache to the side, Orochimaru stumbled forward and disappeared in a flicker of flames.

Elsewhere, Zaku knelt before Orochimaru's throne, idly picking bits of Kidōmaru's webbing out of his uniform. The snake sannin appeared in the room, looking drawn and tired as he hobbled to the throne and sat down.

"Um, my Lord?" Zaku said nervously.

"Silence!" Orochimaru hissed angrily, massaging his temples with his fingers. "You are here to serve me, not to offer medical advice. Stand up."

Zaku stood before the Otokage, wondering what the great man could possibly want from him. After a few moments of tense silence, Orochimaru spoke.

"You know what a jinchūriki is, yes?"

"Certainly, Lord. Containers for the bijū, are they not?"

"True... but what if the entire beast is not sealed?" Orochimaru told him. "What if only part of the bijū is available? The result, you see, is a pseudo-jinchūriki. Much like a true jinchūriki, a pseudo-jinchūriki has access to an array of jutsu derived specifically from the Tailed Beast used in their creation, but they do not contain the beast themselves. Therefore, although they aren't as strong as a jinchūriki, they have much more control over their abilities and don't have to deal with the threat of a vengeful demon escaping."

Curious in spite of himself, Zaku asked, "Why haven't I heard of them before? Surely if they're so powerful, there would be more of them."

Orochimaru looked vaguely impressed. "How... insightful," he murmured. "Truly, only two men in history have become pseudo-jinchūriki: Kinkaku and Ginkaku of Kumogakure. It was an accident, really; they were eaten by the Kyūbi, and to escape they chewed their way out of the demon's belly. Unfortunately, genealogy suggests that they were descendants of the Sage of Six Paths himself, and it was probably a fluke. However, their method of eating the bijū's flesh was rather crude."

Zaku had an unfortunate feeling that he knew where this was going, but Orochimaru's passion was visible in his face, so he kept quiet.

"In the October that the Kyūbi attacked Konoha, rumours went around that a pseudo-jinchūriki had been created. They were quashed almost immediately, but I became curious. Could I create one myself? Surely, taking into account chakra flow patterns and using cell samples from compatible jinchūriki it would be possible, yes?"

"I don't—"

"What if I could use one of my greatest trophies to create my greatest weapons?" Orochimaru went on, his voice rising stridently. "The ultimate ninja! Armed with the power of a bijū, but unencumbered by its presence! It would be astounding! Unheard of! The future is now, Zaku!"

"What the—?"

Orochimaru formed a handseal he didn't recognize, and suddenly Zaku couldn't move. Terrified, the Oto genin was helpless as Orochimaru hiked up his shirt and began drawing an unusual symbol over his sternum.

"This will add an additional chakra source to your Gate of Pain," Orochimaru explained, though Zaku was too far gone to be listening. Orochimaru went on. "A long time ago, I walked into Kumo and killed a doctor... Eh, to make a long story short, I now have one of the Hachibi's horns and a cell culture from Fukai, his jinchūriki at the time. Mm, sure there was a bit of a bloodbath afterwards, but this is an omelette situation. They were all eggs, and so are you!"

.:.

Outside, Kidōmaru was waiting with Kin and Dosu for Zaku to come out.

"What's taking so long?"

"He's probably just—"

"AAAAAAAAARRGH!"

"Fufufufufu!"

Kin and Dosu stared at each other, then turned to stare at Kidōmaru. The Sound jōnin shrugged.

"What can I say? Lord Orochimaru said he'd stop the screaming," he said idly

"What, like with anaesthetic?" Kin asked hopefully.

Kidōmaru looked at her for a second, then burst out laughing.

"Oh... oh... Ahahahaha!" he choked out, his first two pairs of hands slapping his thighs while the third and fourth gripped his sides. "Oh man, Lord Orochimaru using painkillers? Ha ha ha hahaha!"

This is the last chapter before the chūnin exams proper. Some of the things I did here should be explained.

We know nothing about Yugakure save that Hidan killed his neighbours there before becoming a rogue ninja. It's not much of a stretch to say that Jashinism is a local phenomenon, or that Orochimaru has installed a puppet government.

That said, Guren is here because Orochimaru needs all hands on deck for the invasion. Her absence in canon can be forgiven, as she probably didn't exist as a character at the time, but now she does. Shōton— Crystal Release has joined the battle!

Kidōmaru is Team Dosu's jōnin-sensei. It's possible, I guess.

I'm not sure about the manga, but the anime holds that Gyūki is missing a horn because Orochimaru drugged his last jinchūriki and cut it off. Now, if I was a mad scientist with a demon's horn, I'd do something like this with it.

Is Orochimaru overpowered yet? Hopefully, because the action starts here!