Cagalli: Betrayal is a Dull Knife

Climbing off of the seaplane I didn't know what to expect. I prepared for the worst, but I could see the destruction everywhere and it shocked me. "Oh no!" I muttered with a shaky voice. Please let him be okay, let us find Kira.

Kisaka and I slowly walked through the debris of the battle toward the Strike. Please let Kira be there and alive.

"It appears as though the red machine self-destructed and took the Strike with it." Kisaka said as we neared the destroyed mobile suit.

As I was looking at the machine the dread of losing a friend like Kira had started to set in like a lead balloon. I couldn't imagine my life without him – not after everything we had been through. He just couldn't be dead. I placed my right hand against the twisted metal, fighting the horrid images of brutal ends swimming in my mind.

"Did he do this?" I asked no one in particular as I thought about Athrun the pilot of the Aegis.

I had to see if Kira was alive or not, so, against my better judgment, I climbed onto the Strike to get to the cockpit.

"No don't, Cagalli." I heard Kisaka call out as I neared the top and pushed past two soldiers.

I gasped as I looked through the massive gash in the chest of the machine, I could see the melted seat and controls inside, it was a complete mess and it almost brought me to tears.

"Kira." I said quietly, my throat catching just a little, though I would never outwardly let anyone see me compromised.

"A shame," Kisaka said from behind me.

"He's not here!" I said.

"He's not?" Kisaka questioned, a little surprised.

"The cockpits empty," I reply before turning to my left to look for him, "He must have been thrown somewhere," I then turned to my right to look for any sign of him, praying, hoping to see some sign of survival. I refused to give up on him that easily. He would never do that to me, so I would not give up looking of him. "No! Maybe he ejected in time."

I jumped off of the machine down the soft sand to look for him. I had to find him, he might be hurt.

"Cagalli!" I heard Kisaka call out as I landed.

"Colonel Kisaka!" I heard one of the soldiers call out, from ahead, "Over here!"

"Kira?" Did they find him?

I ran as quickly as I could to where six of our soldiers had gathered, Kira has to be over here.

"Kira!" I said as I pushed passed them.

I was shocked it wasn't Kira that I found but Athrun wearing his red pilots uniform. He was unconscious, but they assured us that he was fine; he would live. After the soldiers took Athrun to the seaplane we searched for Kira for a while longer, until we were tired and hungry and our faces stung from the salt water; we never found any sign of him.

I reluctantly left with Kisaka and the others; I had to talk to Athrun. I had to find out what happened, and I didn't care how. I patiently waited in the room that he had been placed in until he had woken up. I knew that he would be in no shape to fight back from any attack from me, and would be able to give me the answers that I needed.

"I see that you're awake." I said as he struggled to sit up.

He must have been a little surprised to see me with a gun pointed toward him, because he immediately ceased action, a trained blank expression plastered across his face. He wasn't scared; we were too tough for that, but that wasn't the point and he was smart enough to comply with me, and shut up.

"At the moment you're aboard an Orb aircraft," I said as I walked toward the bed that he was in, still with my gun pointed toward him. "We decided to take you in after we found you lying on a beach."

"Orb?" He questioned, "What does a neutral nation like Orb want with me?" He turned to look at me with those green eyes of his and a smirk on his face, amused curiosity dancing on his features. "Or am I in the hands of the Earth forces now?"

"There's something I have to know," I said as I watched him remove the IV from his arm and rubbing the spot, "Are you the one that destroyed the Strike?"

He gasped quietly after hearing my question, something that made the sinking feeling return to my stomach. I waited in agony for his response.

"It was me," He replied solemnly.

I gasped at his admission, not knowing what to feel, or what to think.

"What happened to the pilot? Did he escape like you did? Eject? Or…" I couldn't finish my last question. "We couldn't Kira anywhere. Say something!"

"He's dead," Athrun replied calmly as he looked up at me for a brief moment. He then turned his eyes back toward the bed, "because I killed him."

I could not believe what he had just told me. This wasn't possible; he was acting in a completely different way than he was acting on Orb.

"It's true," He said without looking up, "I did it." He turned his head a little to the right before continuing; "I trapped the Strike with my Aegis and blew up. I don't see how he could have escaped."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, this all had to be lies. Kira couldn't be dead. I gripped the collar of his shirt to lift him up slightly so I could look him in the eyes.

"That was the only option that I had left… to finish him."

As he finally turned to look at me I could see the remorse for what he had done to his friend in his eyes. The sadness was overwhelming as his tears began to flow.

"Bastard!" I said as I pushed him back onto the bed.

I pointed the gun in my right hand directly toward his head. I was fighting to keep the tears that were trying to escape from my own eyes back. Finally I couldn't stand it any longer, I let him go and walked over and punched the wall of the small room with my left hand a single time.

"Damn it!" I couldn't hold it in any longer as the tears began to flow from my eyes, my heart breaking slowly into pieces. It stung like a bitch, and all I wanted to do was curl into a ball and sob, but I couldn't. I couldn't let myself lower my defenses like that.

"But why… am I still alive?" He asked confused. I turned with tears flowing down my cheeks to see that he had sat back up. "I guess because I got out just in time." I quickly turned back around and pointed the gun back at him. At this point he turned to look right at me. "Or maybe you're destined to finish me."

"Kira." I said as I looked right at him, "Took too many risks…" I could feel the tears slowly flowing down my face, "didn't always know what he was doing. And always cried. But he was always kind. He was a nice guy!"

I looked up at Athrun just as he turned his vision away from me.

"Yeah I know," he replied, "sounds like Kira didn't change a bit. He was always like that."

I lowered my gun from pointing toward him.

"Did… you?"

"He was a sentimental crybaby, and he was smart but he never thought things through."

"Did you really know Kira?"

"Yes," He replied as a small bittersweet smile appeared on his face, "We were close."

Then how could you have done this I thought.

"We've been friends, ever since the days when we were kids. We were the best of friends."

"But then… that's crazy." I said as fresh tears began to fall. I walked over and grabbed the collar of his shirt again, "If you were such a good friend, then why the hell would you kill him?"

"I… I don't know. I have no idea why either, okay!"

I loosened my grip on his collar. Tears returned to his eyes, he must have been thinking back to when he and Kira where younger, to a better time in their lives when this could never have happened.

"We separated as friends, and then the next time that I saw him, we were enemies."

"Enemies?" I asked.

"I asked him to come with us over and over," Athrun looked at me tears freely flowing from his eyes again. "Because he was a Coordinator, can't you see, he was one of us that's where he belonged."

Tears were starting to form in my eyes again from what Athrun was saying.

"It wasn't right for him to be on the side of the Earth forces."

"So you…"

"But whenever we talked he wouldn't listen! He fought against us, even hurting friends of mine. And then he killed Nicol!"

"And so that's why you killed Kira?" I asked, "Your friend?"

"He was an enemy!" Athrun replied, his voice rising in pained anger. "He wasn't on my side anymore! I had no other choice but to kill him."

I couldn't take it any more; someone needed to let him know what he was saying.

"You idiot," I said as I grabbed his collar again, "How could you ever come up with something so stupid? How could you end up doing something so terrible?"

"He killed Nicol right in front of my eyes!" He replied, "Nicol was fifteen, he loved the piano. He only fought to protect the PLANTs and Kira killed him."

"The reason that Kira fought was to protect other people too. But it doesn't explain why he had to be killed, and at the hands of his best friend of all people."

Athrun turned away from me as tears began to flow from his eyes again.

"Someone kills for killing another," I said with a sadden voice, "Then that guy is killed for killing him," I turned my vision to look directly at Athrun, "How is that kind of twisted thinking ever going to bring us peace?" I could feel the fresh tears slowly falling down my cheeks again.

"Well?"

I could see his eyes, the regret that riddled them, and I prayed that he knew the damage he had caused. I hoped that he could stand to look at himself now that he knew who he really was. And most of all I hoped that he could ever forgive himself as I wrapped my arms around him and we both shed tears for the friends that we had lost.

After the tears had been shed I walked over and sat down on the couch waiting to be informed when he would be returned to ZAFT, leaving him to think about what he had done.

"His escort has arrived," Kisaka said as he opened the door.

I stood up from the couch that I was sitting on and looked toward Athrun; he had a blank expression on his face as he just stared forward.

"Athrun," I said as I walked toward him, but he did not respond in any way.

I placed my left hand on his shoulder shacking it, "come on, they're here for you."

He finally looked up at me, but his eyes looked like he was not fully there. He looked blank, completely vacant. Everything that he had done must have finally just been too much.

"We're not allowed to bring any ZAFT soldiers into Orb territory." I explained. I pulled on his shoulders to have him stand to his feet, and he lazily complied. "Get up. Are you going to be alright?"

"Probably," Athrun smiled at me. "You're one strange person you know that?"

"I guess you deserve a thank you at least." He said. "But right now I don't know."

As he walked past me to leave the room I raised my hand over my heart, suddenly remembering something important, and in that moment, I knew what I was going to do.

"Wait a minute!" I called to him, moving to catch up as I removed the small amulet from around my neck. I placed the small pink stone around Athrun's neck as he looked at me with bated curiosity.

"It's a Haumea amulet," I explained, "You have a thing for getting into trouble. It'll protect you."

"Even after what I did to Kira?" He questioned.

"I just don't want anyone else to die." I answered.

There have already been too many people killed in this stupid war, I thought as I looked into his eyes.

Kisaka and I walked Athrun to the exit of plane where one of our soldiers waited with a boat to take him to a small transport plane. We both watched as he slowly climbed onto the transport before waiting for the soldier to return. And as I watched him fade into nothing in the horizon, I hoped that this war ends soon so no other person has to lose their lives like Kira did.

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