"Hooray for Hollywood! That screwy, ballyhooey Hollywood! Where any office boy or young mechanic can be a panic with just a good-looking pan..."
"LUIGI! Clamp up or I'll make ya start singing, Hooray for Hospitals!"
Luigi looked up and saw Wario sitting in the bus seat across from him, looking pretty mad.
"What? I was just getting into the mood..."
"Well, you can do that without the obnoxious musical number, thank you very much!"
Luigi realized that arguing with Wario would get him nowhere (except maybe a fist in the face), so he decided to end his little song and talk to his brother.
"Hey, Mario!" Luigi began, "So, we're going to MGM Studios today, huh?"
"Yep!" Mario replied, "And Daisy did research on it, right?"
"You bet!" Daisy responded, "The first ride we're going to go on is The Great Movie Ride!"
"Oh boy! How amazingly descriptive!" Waluigi cried sarcastically, "Let me guess: It's a ride about movies!"
"Just ignore him..." Peach moaned, "... Oh look! We're here!"
The bus came to a stop, and everyone got off right in front of the main entrance. A few moments later, they were walking down Hollywood Boulevard, with a replica of the Mann's Chinese Theater standing proudly at the end, and a giant Sorcerer Mickey's hat a short distance in front of it. While they were walking, Luigi continued to hum Hooray for Hollywood, and that alone was enough to get Wario annoyed again.
"Yo, greenie! I thought I told you to cool it with that stupid song!" Wario shouted
"You only said I couldn't sing it," Luigi slyly explained, "You didn't say anything about me humming it."
"Grr... Fine! No singing, humming, or anything else that involves vibrating your vocal cords, or else I'll rip them out!"
Luigi stopped humming... and a few seconds later started whistling.
"WHAT DID I JUST TELL YOU?"
"You don't vibrate your vocal cords when you whistle!"
Next thing Luigi knew, he was trying to pull his head out of a trashcan.
After Luigi finally managed to free his noggin, the group entered the courtyard of the Mann's Chinese Theater where there was, of course, cement tiles containing the handprints of famous celebrities. However, since this was Disney, there were an abundance Disney characters' handprints. Mario, like most other tourists, couldn't resist seeing how his hands compared to the ones in the ground.
"Hey! Would you look at that!" Mario commented, "My hands are almost exactly the same size as Mickey Mouse's!"
"Maybe it's because of your gloves," Peach suggested.
Mario looked at his hands and noticed that his gloves did indeed look like Mickey's.
"Wow, how about that…" Mario mused, "I never really noticed that before… Hmm…"
"So guys," Daisy interrupted, "Are we gonna go on the ride, or are we just gonna stand around the entrance all day?"
"Oh, right! Coming!" Mario called out as the group entered the attraction. Inside, the waiting queue wove around glass cases holding movie memorabilia, including Dorothy's red slippers and a carousel horse from Mary Poppins. While this was all fascinating to the Mario Bros. and the princesses, Wario and Waluigi, not surprisingly, were hardly impressed.
"This is boooooring!" Waluigi whined, "When do we get to go on the actual ride?"
The line went into the next room, which looked like a movie theater that showed trailers to all the films the ride would actually go through. Although this was still a snooze-fest for Waluigi, Wario was actually kind of interested in it, if only because he was a couch potato.
"Ooooo…" Wario mumbled, "TV… Must… Watch…"
The next room (which took a while to drag Wario into) was the actual loading dock, and everyone filed into one of the cars. However, as soon as the ride was about set off, Hooray for Hollywood started playing in the background!
"NOOOOO!" Wario screamed, "NOT THAT INFERNAL SONG AGAIN!"
Unfortunately for him, there was nothing he could do about it except plug his ears until the car left the room. The first few areas of the ride were nothing too exciting, but as it entered a room based on old gangster films, a bunch of audio-animatronic mobsters started shooting at them!
"Mamma mia!" Mario cried, "And I thought Rogueport was bad!"
"WAAA! Hold your fire!" Wario pleaded, "I'm too young and dashingly handsome to die!"
"Hey," Daisy calmly said, looking at her guide book, "Did you know that the license plate of that car they're shooting from, 021-429 is the same as the date of the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, 2/14/29?"
"Like I'm really looking at the car they're SHOOTING me from!" Waluigi shouted back, "Someone get us outta here!"
Waluigi got his wish. However, it wasn't exactly as he had planed. One of the mobsters (who was a real live actor) threw the tour guide out of the car and drove off with the guests! They entered the next area, which looked like a western flick. Just like the previous room, the group quickly found themselves under attack again, this time by bank robbers! Thankfully, they got out of there right before the bank blew up, but the next film the ride went into was even worse: It was Alien! Not surprisingly, the alien himself appeared and attempted to eat the crowd!
"IEEE!" Luigi squealed, "IT'S THE SHROOB INVADERS AGAIN!"
"Not quite, bro…" Mario muttered, "I think this guy is a few notches above the Shroobs…"
Fortunately, they escaped in the nick of time once more. The next chamber was based off of Raiders of the Lost Ark, complete with Indiana Jones lifting the Ark off its pedestal. However, the next room the ride entered was also sort of Indy themed, but there was a giant red ruby mounted on the far wall.
"Hello, gorgeous…" Wario began, dollar signs appearing in his eyes, "Come to daddy…"
The gangster had the same thought process as Wario, and since he was the one who was supposed to grab the jewel, he got out while Mario and the rest tried to pin Wario down and keep him from ruining the ride. Sure enough, the gangster, despite the warning given by a mysterious robbed man, touched the gem, and immediately transformed into a skeleton! Not only that, the other man removed his robes to reveal himself to be the original tour guide!
"Oh…" Wario muttered, observing the fate of the gangster, "… I knew that was gonna happen all along! What an idiot that guy was! Doesn't he know that stuff like that is always cursed?"
"Uh, huh…" Peach mumbled, "And who was going to try to grab that jewel first?"
"HEY! WHAT ARE YOU INSINUATING?"
The rest of the ride went on relatively calmly, with more pleasant scenes from Tarzan, The Wizard of Oz, and Fantasia. After the ride ended, the group left the attraction… and Luigi started singing again.
"Hooray for Hollywood! Where you're terrific if you're even good! Where anyone at all from Shirley Temple to Aimee Semple is equally understood!"
"Yo, Luigi! Why won't you freakin' shut up?" Wario roared.
"Hey, I know how we can get Luigi to quiet down!" Waluigi, looking at the park map, declared.
"Hooray for... You do?" Luigi stuttered.
"Yep, we'll just check into a new hotel!"
"A-Wha?..." Wario grunted, "How's that gonna help?"
"Because..." Waluigi began, an evil little smirk appearing on his face, "It's the Hollywood Tower Hotel."