The next morning I could hardly contain my excitement. I got dressed in a flash, putting on my usual get up; t-shirt, jeans, sneakers, and a hoodie. I nearly soaked myself in body splash and hoped it would be a good enough substitute for a shower. I brushed my teeth and hair and flew down the stairs. I was in such a rush that I didn't even remember I was supposed to be mad at my dad for not believing in my dreams. I wished him good luck on his search, grabbed my backpack and lacrosse stick, and headed out the door. All in all it took about ten minutes to get into my car. It didn't normally take to long for me anyway, but I was very eager to get to school and see this bite. Scott didn't seem too fazed about it, but there was no denying how unbelievably cool it was.
I drove at speeds that my father would have definitely disapproved of. I didn't care. I pulled into the parking lot at around 7:20. That was pretty early and almost no one was at the school yet. That was fine. I would wait. I would wait until Scott pulled up on his dinky little bicycle. That kid seriously needed his own car. The thing was, I hated waiting. I hated it so much. I always needed something for my mind to do. I suppose I could have let my mind wander, but there was no way of knowing if I would even remember what I was so excited about once Scott arrived. One of the perks of having ADHD. I could get distracted very easily. I took out a pill bottle from my backpack and popped a few adderall. Sure the stuff made me twitchy as fuck, but it did help keep my mind focused.
I glanced down at my phone again. 7:30. Another half hour. Great. I decided to pass the rest of the time by watching the first few minutes of an episode of Doctor Who. People slowly began to trickle into the school and I scanned the parking lot for my mauled friend. I put my phone away and decided to be somewhat social on my first day back. I caught up with a few of my other friends and found out which classes I had with who. Finally I spotted a familiar head of shaggy hair strolling out of the parking lot. I raced toward him with my most eager expression on my face.
"Ok," I said, "let's see this thing." He lifted up his shirt to reveal a shockingly large, bloodstained bandage. I reached a tentative hand toward it, but he pushed me away.
"Yeah," he said, "it was too dark to see much, but I think it was a wolf."
"A wolf bit you?" I snickered. "No, not a chance."
"Well I heard a wolf howling," he argued.
"No you didn't."
Scott laughed. "What do you mean no I didn't. How do you know what I heard?" I loved how out of touch Scott was. Or maybe I just had too many useless facts cluttering my brain. Either way I thought it was time to let Scott in on the truth.
"California doesn't have wolves," I said as though it was blatantly obvious. "Not in like 60 years."
"Really?" Scott's eyes widened.
"Yes, really. There are no wolves in California." Scott looked around and then leaned forward.
"We'll if you don't believe me about the wolf," Scott said, "then you are definitely not going to believe me when I tell you I found the body." My heart quite literally skipped a beat.
"Are you kidding me?" I couldn't help keep the smile off of my face. Why was I so excited about this?
"I wish, " Scott said distantly, "I'm gonna have nightmares for a month."
"Oh God," I chuckled. "That is freaking awesome. I mean this is seriously going to be the best thing that's happened to this town since-"
I saw her out of the corner of my eye and couldn't resist.
"-since the birth of Lydia Martin of course." She strode elegantly past me like some kind of model.
"Hey Lydia! You look like..." She didn't even make eye contact with me as she whisked her way into the school.
"...like you're going to ignore me. Bitch." I turned back toward Scott and knew the look of disgust was clear on my face. He snorted .
"Why do you hate her so much?" Out of all of the dumb questions Scott had asked, this had to be one of the dumbest.
"I don't know. She's arrogant, preppy, stuck-up, her boyfriend's a total dick; should I continue?"
Scott just shook his head and made his way toward the school. I followed close behind. Students flooded the hallways, already converging into tiny individual cliques. Scott and I pushed our way past a few confused Freshmen and headed to our first period class.
"So are you ready for tryouts?" Scott asked skeptically. I gave him my most assured look.
"Scott," I said as I put my arm around his shoulders, "this is the year. The year I change everything. The year I join the lacrosse team."
"First girl in the history of the school," Scott mumbled. I bore my eyes into him so he would know how serious I was.
"It's going to happen."
Scott just nodded. "You have the school handbook?"
I reached into my pocket and pulled out the small blue book. I routinely flipped open to a page that had been repeatedly dog-eared.
"The list of school sports rules and regulations." I pointed to a small paragraph of text and recited it.
"'Any and all students willing to audition to take part in the Beacon Hills lacrosse team must be given as fair a chance as any other student. The selecting of team members must not be based on prejudices including race, gender, sexual orientation, or stature.'" I snapped the book shut with a smug look of triumph on my face.
"Coach has to let me try out." And he'd be damned if he didn't.
"Well you do play better than most guys on our team." Scott answered. "I sucked last year and I was still on the team." As a bench warmer. I didn't want to be a bench warmer. But maybe that was as good as it was going to get.
"But this year is going to be different for me too," Scott announced. "I'm going to make first line."
I just smiled.
We entered our first period class and found our assigned seats. Fortunately, Scott and I weren't too far away from each other. Our teacher, Mr. Wells, was very inclined to tell us about the about the body that was found in the woods. I gave Scott a knowing smile and he continued to say that a suspect was already in custody. I would have to ask my dad about it later. Mr. Wells also pointed out that the murder shouldn't distract us from the syllabus on our desk outlining the upcoming semester. The class groaned in unison as we took a look at the packet.
For some reason Scott seemed a little jumpy. He was looking around the classroom as if trying to find someone. He then focused his attention out the window and kept his gaze fixed there for some time. Maybe he was just nervous about lacrosse tryouts.
The only somewhat exciting event that happened during class was the arrival of a new student. She and our vice principal walked in during the beginning of class. He introduced her as Allison Argent. Allison made an awkward wave to the class and then proceeded to the back of the classroom. I gave her a small smile as she passed me and took her seat behind Scott. She was a very pretty girl with dark hair, flawless skin, and big brown eyes.
After sitting, Scott immediately turned around and handed her a pen. She gave a somewhat surprised look and brushed her hair out of her face.
"Thanks," she muttered with a smile. Scott just stared back her with a goofy grin. Nice flirting Scott.
The rest of the day passed dismally. We made our way from class to class, getting back into the swing of school. I wasn't really paying attention in any of my classes. All I could think about were the tryouts. I didn't know if I was ready. Hell, I didn't even know if I was going to be able to tryout. But eventually eighth period came and went and it was time. Scott took a particularly long time putting his stuff in his locker, so I took this as an opportunity to unload all of my thoughts.
"Coach better let me tryout," I said. "I've worked way too damn hard for this. And I'm a pretty decent lacrosse player. Putting me on the team would be the best decision that coach ever made."
Scott wasn't even looking at me. His eyes were focused across the hall to another set of lockers were the new girl was putting away her things. We had gone from awkward smiles to leering. Scott really new how to get the ladies. I decided to shut up and let Scott have this moment. It wasn't everyday my boy got a crush.
Suddenly Lydia descended onto Allison like a vulture swooping in on a carcass. I couldn't exactly hear what she was saying, but Lydia looked as prissy as ever. Just has she had flashed a very fake looking smile, Lydia's Neanderthal of a boyfriend decided to join them. Jackson Whittemore was the epitome of douchebaggery. He always had such a smug look on his face that you just wanted to smack off. He and Lydia basically ruled the school. They could make or break you. They had way too much power for their own good.
Jackson put his arm around Lydia and pulled her close to him. This normally would have been a romantic gesture, but Jackson made it look as though he was guarding one of his possessions. He leaned down and kissed Lydia. It also should have been a romantic gesture, but he wasn't doing it for love. He was doing it to show off. Fucking disgusting. Apparently Morgan, a girl we shared a few classes with, thought it was disgusting as well. She walked over to me and Scott, leaning her weight against the lockers.
"Can someone please explain to me," she said, "how New Girl is here all of five minutes and she is already hanging out with Lydia's clique?" The answer seemed obvious.
"It's because she's hot," I responded. Scott clearly didn't have any input to the conversation, as he was still staring stupidly at Allison. I continued.
"Beautiful people herd together."
"But that isn't true for everybody," Morgan argued. "There are plenty of cute girls in the school who don't hang out with Lydia."
"Oh yeah? Name one."
Morgan paused for a few seconds before finally saying, "You."
I just chuckled. "I rest my case."
"You going to lacrosse practice today?" Morgan asked.
"I'm not just going," I replied, "I'm trying out."
Morgan's eyes opened wide. "Coach is gonna let you?"
"I don't know," I answered. "I hope so. Actually, we should probably get going. Scott-"
Scott still stared at Allison, Lydia, and Jackson in some sort of trance. I snapped my fingers in front of his face.
"Hello? Scott?" He blinked a few times and turned to look at me. He still looked dumbfounded. I shook my head and began to make my way toward the locker rooms . Scott looked back at Allison a few times before following.
Scott and I separated as he entered the boy's locker room and I entered the girl's. Even though the boy's locker room was packed tight, I was the only person in the girl's. I stripped out of my normal clothes and put on my pads. I was probably the only girl in Beacon Hills to own a set. After exiting the locker room I caught up with Scott. I got a few strange looks on the way to the field that I tried to ignore. I couldn't help but entertain the idea that I was going to be benched for the entire season, if I even made the team.
"Scott," I said, "if you play, I'll have no one to talk to on the bench. Are you really going to do that to your best friend?"
"I can't sit out again," Scott announced. "My whole life is sitting on the sidelines. This season I make first line. And you make the team!" Scott bumped my shoulder reassuringly and gave me that stupid smile of his that said "everything is going to be great." Sure it was.
"McCall!" Coach Finnstock approached us now and shoved a goalie's stick into Scott's chest.
"You're in goal."
"But I've never played," Scott protested.
"I know," Coach smirked. "Scoring some shots will give the boys confidence boost. First day back thing. Get em energized. Fired up!"
"What about me?" Scott asked. Very good question.
Coach just smiled and said, "Try not to take any in the face." Then he gave Scott a light smack on the cheek and walked back toward the team. It was a surprise that I didn't end Coach right there.
"Fucking asshole," I muttered.
"It's ok," Scott reassured. "He thinks I'm going to suck but I'm not. Putting me in goal is the perfect way to show I'm not just a one trick pony."
"Scott," I said, "you're a no trick pony."
"Rude," Scott said, his eyes on Coach. "I'm gonna show him. I'm gonna show you."
And with that Scott quickly strode toward the goal. I shook my head and sat down on the bench, nervously chewing at the fingertips of my gloves. I didn't want Scott to fail. He needed this. He needed some way to earn his confidence. I hoped he would make the best goalie ever. I hoped Coach put him on first line. I hoped that he and New Girl ended up together. I hoped he would get to have almost everything I probably never would in high school. Because I cared about Scott. I loved Scott. He was the closest thing I had to a brother.
Scott took his position in goalie and gave me a thumbs up. I returned the gesture with a very clear "oh, shit" look on my face. His eyes then slid to the stands and I didn't even have to turn around to know that he was looking at Allison. He was so predictable. Suddenly the referee blew his whistle. Scott clutched his head as if an explosion had just gone off near him. He dropped the stick completely just as one of the guys launched a ball square at his head.
C'mon Scott, I thought, pick up the stick. Play the game. Succeed for once.
The ball hit him directly in the face and he sprawled backwards, landing painfully on his back. Well so much for being the best goalie ever. There was always next year, Scott. Coach and the rest of the team laughed as Scott picked himself up off of the ground. Those little shits. I would show them a thing or two about dignity when I got the chance. I tried to give Scott my most supportive look, but I'm sure it just came off as "I told you so."
Scott shook his head as he looked back toward the field and the line of lacrosse players wanting to see him eat it. The next shot was made by a Junior. It wasn't a particularly strong shot, but knowing Scott's goaltending skills, it should have easily made its way into goal. But it was stopped by Scott. The ball landed safely in the net of his stick. Scott looked at it in disbelief, as did I. Was this pure luck or the beginning of all the changes we had been raving about? Either way I was extremely proud of Scott and cheered him on.
Scott smiled as he got a better grip on his stick. He seemed more confident already. The players continued to take their shots at the goal and Scott continued to block every single one. He moved with expert agility as he pivoted his body in just the right angle to block each shot. I had never seen this clumsy and awkward boy move so gracefully before. Maybe this was the year of change. Maybe Scott was a good omen for my chances at making it onto the team. Maybe-
Jackson pushed the next player out of the way, very clearly wanting to take his shot at Scott. Oh, fuck.
"C'mon Scott, c'mon," I muttered as Jackson took a running start at the goal.
Jackson may have been a grade-A dick, but he was a damn good lacrosse player. He was the captain after all. I couldn't really see Scott's face past the helmet, but I was sure he was terrified. Jackson took giant bounding steps before leaping into the air. He swung his lacrosse stick at a very sharp angle and the ball went hurtling toward the goal. It was probably one of the most powerful shots I had seen from him.
Scott reacted quickly. He brought his stick around and lunged forward in time with the ball. To everyone's amazement, he blocked the shot easily. I couldn't help but jump up from the bench and burst into cheers for my friend. The small crowd joined in with me, because, wow. Just wow. I had never witnessed Scott do anything so incredibly amazing in my life. Jackson just hung his head in shame. Scott had shamed him. Scott tossed the ball, without even looking, toward the referee. The ball landed snuggly in his stick. Ok, now he was just showing off.
Coach called Scott out of the goal, still completely in shock. He didn't say a word to Scott about what had just happened. He just patted him on the shoulder and sent him back toward the benches. Scott approached me triumphant.
"So?" He asked with a smile. "How did I do?"
"I-I," I couldn't even form words. "That. Was. Incredible. How did you even do that?"
"I don't know!" Scott exclaimed. "It just happened. Look I'll talk to you about it later. Now it's your time to shine." He gave me a small hug as Coach walked toward the benches.
"How am I going to top that?" I pointed out. Scott shrugged.
"Ok," Coach said still looking dumbfounded. "I need some volunteers for a quick scrimmage." I and a few other guys got up off of the bench. The sight of me heading toward the field seemed to snap Coach back to his normal self.
"Stilinski!" he shouted. "Where the hell do you think you're going?"
It was now or never.
"Uh," I stuttered. "I'm, uh, going to try out." Coach laughed in my face.
"No you're not," he chuckled. Then he became more serious. Well, as serious as he could be. "Lacrosse is for boys only! Even if you dress like a boy and hang out with one, it doesn't make you one! Got it?" He turned to return to the field.
"Coach!" I called, fumbling for the handbook. "Lacrosse isn't just for boys. In the handbook it says that girls are allowed to try out, too." I held out the book in order to try and show Coach the text, but I almost dropped it my hands were shaking so bad. Why was I so fucking nervous?
Coach didn't even want to look at me. I followed close behind him with the book outstretched.
"Sir, please look."
Ignoring me still, he called the boys to get in position.
"Coach?"
"Alright," he shouted, "I want blue jerseys on the right side of the field. No Greenberg! I said-"
"COACH, LISTEN!"
He finally turned to look at me, his expression a mix between amusement and blistering rage. But I wasn't scared to do this anymore. I was just pissed.
"Coach, look at this and then tell me what I can and cannot do."
After a few beats Coach snatched the small blue book from my hand. He eyed me skeptically and then looked down at the pages. He mouthed softly as he read and I stood next to him with my arms crossed. He eventually closed the book and looked at me with annoyance in his eyes. He slowly handed it back to me.
"It doesn't matter," he said in an unusually quiet voice. "There has never been a girl on the Beacon Hills lacrosse team in the history of the school. And as long as I am coach, there never will be." He turned back toward the field. I wasn't done yet.
"Well, we could always take this up with the principal," I threatened. "Or better yet, we could go to the School Board. They did have an entire seminar about sexism in our local schools. I'm sure that a nice lawsuit would look great on your record. Right next to the DUIs and unpaid parking tickets."
When I say that the silence was deafening, I mean it. Everybody was staring at the two of us. No one, not even anyone in the stands, was making a peep. I could feel Scott's worried eyes on me, but I didn't turn to look at him. I just kept my glare fixed on Coach. When I was determined to do something, I was a force to be reckoned with and Coach knew it. We just stared at each other for sometime before Coach finally spoke.
"Get the hell on the field," he said quietly.
It was as if this weight had been lifted off of my chest. I breathed out a sigh of relief. This was everything that I had been working up to and it finally paid off.
"Are you serious?" I said in quiet disbelief.
"Just get on the field before I change my mind," Coach answered. "And all of you." He looked at the silent crowds. "What the hell are you all staring at. This is a lacrosse practice. Let's go!" He clapped his hands and the world seemed to resume motion. Like, nothing to see here. Just history in the making.
I stepped onto the field and placed my helmet over my head. It all felt so weird. This was the moment that I had been dreaming of for so long and now that it was here I felt like I was going to throw up. Jackson was still on the field. Even though the rest of the guys would be a little nervous about tackling a girl, Jackson wouldn't be afraid to rough me up a bit. Because he was a jerk. But also because I think he respected me. Weird.
I joined the rest of the team that were wearing blue jerseys and joined the huddle. Jackson was captain of our little squad. Of course. He barked out a few orders that I didn't quite understand and told me to stick close to our goal. So basically keep out of the way.
I took my position on the field and legitimately gulped. The seconds seemed like hours until the referee blew his whistle. After he did, it all moved too fast. Our team already had the ball and was heading toward the other goal. I followed but managed to keep my distance. I took just a few more steps forward before my teammate with the ball was tackled by about four guys. They fell at my feet and my heart was pounding. I looked at Scott sitting on the benches. I desperately needed some encouraging. Unfortunately, Scott wasn't even looking at me. His eyes were fixed on Allison talking to Lydia in the stands. Way to be there, Scott.
"Stiles!" The shout brought me back to the reality. Jackson looked at me extremely annoyed.
"If you want to be on the team," he barked, "you have to get your head in the game."
I nodded like an idiot and he rolled his eyes. I heard the whistle blow again and the game was in motion. I was more focused now, despite everything, and kept my eyes on the ball quite literally. Somehow, Jackson made a bad pass and the ball landed directly at my feet. Which was weird. Did Jackson do that on purpose? Is he giving me a chance to show off? I didn't really have time to think about that because a herd of lacrosse players was now barreling towards me. I scooped up the ball in the net of my stick and ran.
I easily maneuvered my way around the first few guys. It did help that they seemed to be very hesitant about knocking me to the ground. The next guy actually did try to block me, but I ducked around him. I was in clear view of the goal now. Several of the other blue jerseys were open and expecting me to pass the ball to them. But I wouldn't. This was my chance. My opportunity to prove that I was a lacrosse player. Some of the other team was gaining on me now and I had to make my shot. It was now or never. I hurled the ball forward with all of my might. I tried to put a bit of a curve on it so it would spin into the goal. The ball seemed to be heading straight for the goalie's stick, but at just the last moment it curved to the right. It missed the stick by just a hair and flew into the net.
The crowd on the stands, especially the girls, began to cheer. I looked over and Scott was looking at me now. He was standing and cheering and beaming and he just looked so proud. I smiled at him before I got a few pats on the back from a few of the people wearing blue jerseys, even a few who were wearing red. I got several compliments and remarks.
"Good job, Stiles!"
"Way to go Stilinski!"
"I didn't know you were a girl!"
I looked over at Coach, but his face was unreadable. He didn't seem impressed or angry or anything. He just kept his expression blank and shouted at the team to get back into position. I retreated back and got a very respectful glare from Jackson. This was probably as close as we were ever going to get and that was fine with me. Even though we might respect each other as lacrosse players, we certainly didn't respect each other as human beings.
As the game continued I managed to score a few more times and our team even won. After the scrimmage I was sweaty, out of breath, but totally exhilarated. I walked over to the bench where Scott encircled me in a bear hug.
"I told you," he said when he had released me, "this is the year of change."
"Maybe now I believe you," I admitted. It was true that things were changing. I mean, Scott was actually good at lacrosse, Coach actually let me try out, and me and Jackson had a sort of respect for each other. Could things get any weirder?