Missing 2 and a half hours
Liv and Amanda got back to the school a little before Nick and Fin showed up there as well. Liv and Amanda had no luck as they drove around the area around the mall and diner. Nick and Fin had been past Joe's job after they left his apartment. His boss didn't expect him in until tomorrow. According to the boss Joe was an okay kid just a bit immature and he had a habit of getting himself into trouble. He seemed to be aware of Joe's past encounters with the law and he got a bit vague when it came to Joe's drug habits. Fin pushed him though and they learnt the boss felt sorry for him. Joe reminded him of himself as a kid and the boss only tried to be supportive and hoped he would kick his back habit sooner or later. He'd apparently given Joe a heads up whenever there was a scheduled drug test at work. The boss told them about this pub where they would hang out after work but he was unaware of what other places Joe liked to hang out at.
They had two unmarked cars outside Joe's apartment while a CSI team turned it upside down. They were hoping Joe and the woman would end up there at some point. Hopefully with Fay still with them. They still had no idea to why they'd taken Fay but it was in all minds that it might have to do with money and drugs. That they might try and sell her on the black market for cash or something stupid like that. Since Nick found the photos in Joe's apartment though the fear it was about child pornography or some sex slave ring grew a little. There seemed to be no ransom demand being made. Amanda had only received one call since the abduction and it was involving another case they were working. Liv had taken over the call once they knew it wasn't a kidnapping ransom demand and since Amanda couldn't get a word out. Liv had felt how much her hands had been shaking when she took the phone from her.
Cragen couldn't find any links to any ongoing investigations either and Amanda withheld she hadn't received any threats. The driver at the delivery company remembered driving by the three as he left the diner. The woman had been carrying the little one and it looked as though she was yelling at the man she was with but Jasper hadn't heard what was said. They were officially on a stand-still. No leads. No clues. Nowhere closer to finding Fay.
Chad was still giving out a positive vibe though. The fact they had a name of one of the abductor and they had witnesses that could point out both of them in a line-up was all good he withheld. But that still didn't leave Fay anywhere near safe. Amanda checked the watch on the wall for the third time since Cragen had led her into the room they'd made their headquarter for the time being. Liv was also checking her watch. They were closing in on 3 hours and they all knew the facts: the first 3 hours are the most crucial for the safe return of a missing child. Fin growled loudly as he and Nick checked the map and the marked out route Fay had been at. It ended by the diner and then she was gone.
"Someone must have seen them," he said out loud. Liv knew the area now though as she had just driven around there and it was dead calm. Not much traffic and no cameras. They had still marked out a wide area around the diner and had patrol cars circling it and also looking for cameras. Munch was sorting through many tips that came in to the hot-line at the station but so far nothing had turned out to be helpful. A few minutes passed by when no one said anything and the room fell eerie quiet. The only sound was Lexie as she punched in letters into her tablet. She'd been glued to that tablet since they arrived to the scene.
Fin met Amanda's eyes in the midst of this silence and she felt as though she was about to break in half. She wasn't sure she could handle this any longer. It looked as though Fin was about to say something when he got interrupted by his own phone. He saw Ken's name in the display, thought about ignoring it but then decided to pick up. He stepped out in the hallway. Fin didn't even have the chance to say hi before Ken started speaking.
"What's this about an Amber alert out on Fay?" he asked, clearly agitated. Fin covered his eyes with his hand not knowing what to say. He, just like Amanda, felt like he was on the verge of breaking now that they had nothing to go on. It had been many years now since he'd felt his heart ache like this and he didn't like it.
"Dad?" Ken urged.
"Yeah, yeah she's missing," he said.
"Oh God. Alejandro called and had seen it, I didn't want to believe it was true. When? Why? How?"
"About three hours ago, from her school, we don't know the why yet," Fin tried to give him as much information as they got without upsetting him too much.
"You know who took her?"
"We have a name yes but we haven't been able to catch him."
"Him? Do you know him? Is it someone you've arrested?"
"No. No, we have no relation to him. We're clueless," Fin admitted.
"What can we do?" Ken asked and meant him and Alejandro.
"Not much right now, we have almost the entire NYPD searching for her," Fin sighed.
"There must be something we can do," Ken urged and Fin felt his pain.
"I'm afraid there's not. We trailed them to a mall but all the clues ends there," Fin had to work hard to keep his voice steady. There was a silent pause.
"How's Amanda doing?" Ken asked even though he figured he already knew how bad she must be feeling right now. Fin gave it a second and he watched the door that he knew Amanda was on the other side off.
"She's hanging in there," he said.
"There's a tip line right?" Ken asked.
"Yeah, Munch is running it over at the station."
"Will he let me help answer phones?" Ken asked.
"Yeah since it's you I'm sure he will," Fin said and managed to smile just a little.
"Okay, I'll head over there then. You'll call me when you hear anything," Ken asked and deliberate used 'when' and not 'if'.
"I will. Thanks son," Fin hung up before his voice broke. He stayed out in the hallway for a bit, not able to handle the silence in the next room just yet.
Missing 3 and a half hours
There had been nothing but anxiety or small outburst going around the room for the past hour. Cragen had tried but failed to get Amanda to eat something. Fin had verbal outburst every now and then springing from his own inner turmoil. Nick and Liv had been checking in on the interrogations with the kids. They had given up on the three year olds and sent them all home with the request the parents would keep trying to talk to their kids and call in if they got anything. The eight year olds had been given a break and Liv and Nick got to try with one each to get something new out of them. But it was futile, all they'd really seen was two adults hurrying down the street with Fay.
Liv was just about to break the interview with her young witness when she said something interesting though.
"I guess they knew her name though."
"They? The man and woman who took her?" Liv asked and the girl nodded.
"How do you know that?" Liv knew the girl hadn't been near-by when the man went over the fence but only run over there as she'd seen Fay being tossed over it.
"Well John, one of the little ones, said they had called Fay over."
"Are you sure they called Fay over by her name and just not like with hand gestures?"
"I guess I can't be sure but John said they'd called Faith over and I mean no one calls her Faith. I didn't even know that was her real name until today. I always call her Fay, everyone does," the girl looked very sincere.
"Thank you. This is an important piece of information you've given us Hannah," Liv smiled at the girl and then at her father that had come in to help out his daughter and the investigation. Liv excused herself and headed back to the other. Nick was already there.
"They knew her name," Liv said immediately as she entered the room and got everyone's attention.
"Hannah told me that the little boy John had said they called Faith over. Everyone calls her Fay so John picked up Faith somewhere and three of the four young ones said it was the two that started talking to them and not the other way around. So I think it's a high possibility they were after Fay from the start," Liv hurried to get everything out. If this was good or bad though she hadn't had time to reflect over yet. Judging by the faces in the room though it wasn't good. Once Liv went quiet everyone's eyes diverted towards Amanda. She'd gotten up off the floor where she'd momentarily retreated to while Nick and Liv were out.
"What does that mean?" she said with a voice that was about to crack. No one dared to say anything.
"Has someone been following us? Did I miss something?" she asked as tears dwelled up her eyes.
"Don't go there. They could have gotten her name from the school directory or pediatrician or something," Cragen tried to calm her but it only made her more anxious.
"But then it's not a random act. They took her for a reason and since no one called…" Amanda's head was spinning out of control but so was everyone else's too. A random kidnapping wasn't a good thing either but so far they'd seemed to just roam the city a little as they wished, going into a mall where everyone knew there were cameras wasn't a smart thing if you were kidnapping a child for the black market. But if they'd seeked Fay out there must be a reason to why.
"Do you have a photo of Fay on your desk at work? Could someone have seen it passing through?" Chad had to ask. Amanda shook her head, as did Nick and Liv. They all knew she didn't have a photo of her on her desk.
"I never bring her up at work, at least not with a suspect. I've mentioned once or twice I am a mom when hearing victims and all but it's not common," Amanda tried to ransack herself but couldn't come up with anything. She wished she could so they could zero in on who was doing this to her and her daughter. She had felt tears threatening to escape for a while now and she excused herself as they started to fall down her face.
Once she'd left Cragen approached Fin.
"Could this have anything to do with her gambling?" he asked. He'd already mentioned it in confidence to Chad, about Amanda's gambling addiction, and they'd made sure Murphy and his crew was still locked-up.
"No way," Fin said and shook his head. He was dead certain about this.
"She couldn't have slipped? Started it up again?" Liv asked since her mind had gone there too.
"No, see…" Fin sighed, "her dad was a gambler too. He put Amanda and her sister in a, well a very messy situation once when they were really young. She would never – believe me, never – put Fay in that situation." Hadn't they been in this predicament and his guard being completely down he would never had told them this piece of personal information that Amanda had given him in confidence. But he needed to get them off this trail as fast as possible cause there was no way Amanda was gambling again and they couldn't waste time in finding Fay.
Cragen's eyes had widened when Fin told him this but now he nodded. Liv backed off too without any follow-up questions.
"But they knew her name was Faith then," Chad said to try and get them thinking in other directions.
"The only one I've heard use Faith since I got here was the principal. I think we can rule her out but anyone that's only seen official papers will know Fay as Faith Rollins," Chad tried to get his thoughts in motion, "You mentioned pediatrician, we should check that out." Nick walked over to the board where they had everything on Fay pinned up.
"We should check out this speech therapist perhaps," he said and pointed to the board, "He might be a stickler for names and not nicknames."
"Let's look more into the people around Joe too. He doesn't really seem like the type someone would hire for a child napping but perhaps that's what the female was for?" Chad said and sorted through some papers on the table.
Liv went to check on Amanda meanwhile. She found her locked in a stall in the bathroom. Liv asked her if she was okay and after Amanda had said yes she asked Liv to give her a minute. Liv waited outside and didn't have to wait more than a minute before Amanda appeared. Liv could tell by her eyes she'd been crying but didn't confront her. Amanda was obviously doing everything she could to keep herself gathered and Liv knew this wasn't the time. Hopefully she wouldn't have to comfort Amanda but bring an unharmed Fay back to her mother's arms soon. Liv hoped for dear life this would be the case.
Missing 4 hours
Chad, Cragen and Nick were on the phone once they all gathered back in the room. They all shot Amanda a quick look but then deviated their eyes to not intrude. Fin was pacing the room and Amanda would soon join him but on the other side of the room. Liv stayed by the table and looked over the map. She tried to connect the dots and it looked as though they were heading towards Joe's apartment. They'd put a third car on watching the building but so far there was no sign of the three.
One of Chad's detectives suddenly came in and approached Chad.
"We identified the girl on the photos in Joe's apartment," he said to Chad. Nick and Cragen were still on the phone but kept an eye on the newcomer. Liv, Fin and Amanda all got a little closer to him and Chad.
"Her name is Jenna Cartwright and she's 16. The photos a year old though, making her 15 at the time. She's a resident in Flatbush," the detective informed Chad who nodded.
"What photos? What girl?" Amanda asked looking confused. Liv didn't understand it either. Chad threw Fin a quick look that Amanda picked up on. Chad took a deep breath.
"We found some photos in Joe's apartment that may or may not be classified as child pornography," Chad explained and Amanda gasped.
"What?" she asked.
"We don't know if he took them though," Chad tried to ease the situation but Amanda was already worked up. She shot Fin an angry look, one everyone in the room picked up on.
"We've searched the entire place though and we found nothing else," Chad told her.
"Could she be the female with Joe now?" Liv asked. Chad looked to his detective.
"We're sending her photo out to the witness as we speak," he let them know and then walked over to Lexie to give her something. Cragen had gotten off the phone meanwhile and joined Liv by the computer as she took a look at Jenna Cartwright on Chad's laptop.
Fin stayed by Amanda's side. It hadn't gotten unnoticed to him that she'd clenched her fist. He wasn't sure where her head was at though.
"You should have told me," she whispered with loads of bottled up wrath in her lowered voice. He knew she was right but he had tried to protect her. And perhaps himself a little. He didn't want to think about that being the reason Fay had been taken. He couldn't handle Fay's image in his head in that scenario. He felt as though he would crack in thousand pieces if something like that would happen to Fay. He could feel those cracks right now, rupturing a little as Amanda's angry and also devastated eyes now turned towards him. He could see hope seep out of her and it was the last thing he could handle right now. This was all too much for him.
Amanda was feeling just the same. It was getting too much too handle. Her clinched fist felt like hitting him in the chest. Hitting him for not being brutally honest with her as he usually was. Her eyes wanted to hurt him. Like her sight would turn to laser and evaporate him. But her inside just wanted to hug him. Wanted him to hold her and tell her everything would be fine. That it was all just a terrible mix up. Fay was really in her classroom right now, just two doors down and everything was fine. But she wasn't and Amanda didn't know what to do.
Neither she nor Fin had to make a decision of their own though as Munch's voice suddenly came over the intercom. Chad quickly picked it up and said 'receiving' to let Munch know he was on the other side. Fin and Amanda looked his way.
"We got a tip from Prospect Park and just now a second one. I think it's worth checking out." Fin and Amanda quickly came over to the table. Nick, who'd gotten off the phone by now too, quickly found the park on the map on the table and marked it out.
"It's close to Flatbush," Fin said. It was near Joe's apartment.
"Where exactly?" Nick asked since he could tell the park was many acres. Chad relayed the question to Munch.
"Near the west entrance. A woman called in from something called the Garfield tot lot. She'd seen the Amber alert as she left the park with her own kid and thought the child looked familiar. And wait I'll put Ken on, he made the connection to the second tip," there was some static on the line as Munch handed the radio over to Ken. Amanda wasn't clued in that Ken was involved and she felt a little warmth around her heart as she realized it.
"Hey, yeah I checked up on Prospect Park and there was a 911 call like an hour ago from a distressed dog owner. He said a woman had kicked his dog. Or at his dog at least. A young girl had run up to his dog and when it growled the woman had yanked the kid away and kicked at his dog. There had been a man present too and he'd become agitated and the dog owner felt threaten. The dog owner told the dispatcher that the man with them couldn't have been the father cause the child was biracial."
"They sent someone out to check up on it?" Chad asked when he got a chance to. Ken gave them the number of the unit car that had responded.
"And when was this?" They heard Ken turn the radio back over to Munch.
"Dog owner about an hour ago and the woman called in twenty minutes ago," Munch let them know.
"Still good," Chad said to the room.
"Let's go," Fin said and was out the door. There were a few journalists outside the school now and the larger count of people that came running out attracted their attention. The SVU squad was accompanied by Chad, Lexie and two other detectives and another four uniforms were coming with them. Flashes were going off and Liv immediately stepped in front of Amanda to cover her even though her name hadn't been revealed to the press and they probably had no idea she was the missing child's mother. Fin joined Liv and Amanda in her car and Cragen jumped in with Nick. Three unmarked cars and two patrol cars took off from the school premises with screeching tires. It didn't take long until the unmarked cars had blue lights on and Nick took lead speeding through the streets towards Prospect Park.
They had to drive around since they couldn't drive through the park but at the West gate they had people waiting for them. They quickly got informed security had put people on every gate but they also let the newcomers knew it was easy to slip out of the park other ways. Other uniforms had already arrived and had entered the park through other gates and were searching every inch of the park as they spoke. The new crowd were walking and talking towards the tot lot. To Amanda's dismay though she could quickly see Fay wasn't there any longer. A park guard pointed the way where the dog owner had been attacked. He also told them they had camera footage from the past hour coming to them. Fin and Amanda headed back to the cars where Lexie had equipment for them to watch the footage on. Cragen and Chad tagged a long too while Nick and Liv decided to have a look around a bit equipped with the headshots of Joe and now also Jenna.
It felt like it was taking forever to get the parks security footage through to Lexie's computer. All Amanda wanted was a glimpse of her daughter. Lexie had gotten a laptop up upon the hood of Chad's car but it seemed the footage wouldn't transfer and Amanda was getting restless. Cragen tried to talk her down to no use as Fin was getting just as impatient and couldn't keep it inside. It seemed to only fuel Amanda's anxiety on and Cragen wasn't sure how to handle the situation.
"Anytime soon?" he asked Chad and he turned to Lexie and asked the same thing.
"Yupp, got it," Lexie said and Chad gave room for Amanda to come up to the laptop. Lexie stepped away too as she got the footage rolling. Cragen peeked a little over Amanda's shoulder but then stepped away to not crowd her. He'd already heard the tiny sob as Fay appeared on the screen, tumbling over to the playground.
Cragen saw Liv and Nick approaching across a field, judging by their demeanor they had come up empty. Cragen suddenly heard a loud gasp and as he turned he saw Amanda crumble to the ground.
"What the fuck," Fin said out loud, still with his eyes on the computer screen. His concerned looked had turned dark and he looked like he could punch the screen at any second. Meanwhile Amanda had covered her face with her hands as she fell to the ground, she was now down in a pile by Fin's feet. Cragen wasn't sure what was going on and feared for a second Fay had been killed right here in this park, in front of the camera. Liv had seen Amanda fall and she came running over with Nick close behind.
"It's her sister," Fin said and finally was able to let his eyes of the screen.
"Her sister?" Chad echoed. Fin turned the laptop towards him and Cragen.
"That's her sister with Fay," Fin said with even more darkness in his eyes. Liv and Nick stopped right by Cragen's side and they watched the screen as Kim gestured to Fay who was up on a play set. Fay didn't seem to want to come to her and continued the other way. Everyone felt a bit relieved that it wasn't a stranger that had taken Fay.
"So we should call off the Amber alert?" Chad looked a little confused.
"Hell no," Fin almost shouted, "she's a junkie and a psychopath. And she stole a kid that's not hers. Hell knows what she could do with or to her. She's already left her alone with a complete stranger in a mall. She doesn't have an ounce of responsibility in her, she could've left Fay behind all alone right here in this park for all we know." Cragen raised his hand to calm Fin down.
Liv's attention had turned to Amanda's crumbled form on the ground and she now stepped forward to see how she was doing. That made Fin finally look down and he felt a bit bad for not acknowledging Amanda but he was still too mad to do something about it.
"Are you okay?" Liv asked and rubbed Amanda's back as she tried to get through a mess of blonde strands with her other hand to get to her face. She could feel underneath her hand that Amanda was sobbing, her entire body was shaking. She tried to get Amanda to put her hands down but when she wasn't successful she just pulled her close to her own body and held her tight for a while. It was obvious she needed a little more time to absorb the situation. The notion her sister had her daughter hopefully meant they would get the latter one back in one piece but Liv knew too little about Kim as a person and her motifs for taking the kid in the first place. All she knew was the mess with the abusive boyfriend little over a year ago. Liv had served the boyfriend with a restraining order but only seen Kim briefly at the station. Nick had met with her a little more and told Liv she wasn't the brightest bulb walking around.
"She's not a resident of New York right?" Chad asked and Fin had to answer for Amanda.
"No, she's from Georgia and still lives there," Fin informed him.
"Can she get in contact with her?" Chad hinted to Amanda and just assumed the sisters were in contact. Fin took a breath and looked down. He met Liv's eyes briefly and then shook his head.
"I'm not sure," he said as he looked back up, "she, Amanda hasn't talked to her in, well it's been like six months or so." Fin couldn't contain a low growl as the anger still flared inside of him.
"Earlier this year Kim paid a visit. She brought drugs into her apartment and Amanda tossed her out. She thanked her by cleaning out her entire place. They took almost everything, her bed, Fay's bed, couch, Fay's diapers even. Her unicorns."
"She didn't report it?" Nick asked and couldn't hide what he felt about Amanda not going to the police with this. Fin just shot him a look and then looked back at Cragen and Chad.
"It was like the month before that whole Mimi/Escobar ordeal. They haven't talked since then. They've exchanged a few texts but I don't think it's been from her regular phone," Fin was pretty certain Kim had used a disposal phone. Amanda had mentioned the texts and he'd peeked at her phone once or twice. He hadn't been happy about Amanda letting Kim get away with it either.
The phone call from that night Amanda came home to find her place emptied out was still rather fresh in his mind. She'd called a little after seven pm. He'd been able to tell right away she was upset. She came home to find her apartment door unlocked. Since she had Fay with her she'd thought about getting her to safety first but it had been rather obvious once the door fell open that there was no one or nothing left in there. She'd walked in to find the kitchen emptied and somewhat trashed with food from the fridge spilled on the floor. They'd left a bookshelf and some books in the living room. Fay's dresser had been left and thankfully most of her clothes too but her bed, diapers, toys. Gone. Amanda's bedroom looked the same. Emptied. Thankfully she had her laptop with her where she had Fay's baby photos and stuff.
Fin had been over there in less than twenty minutes. He'd found Fay sitting in a corner of the empty living room playing with a roll of toilet paper while Amanda tried to keep it together as she went through her closet. She wanted to make sure her spare gun was still safely looked in its safety. Amanda had, as usual, not been in need of hugs but more of words that let her know they would sort everything out and they could stay at his place until they could refurnish her apartment. She'd been dead set on not turning her sister in though. Fin would just never get just how far Amanda's allegiance to her sister went. She made him swore not to tell anyone about it, no one at work would find out. Fin helped to carry some of Fay's clothes on one arm and he put Fay on the other one as they headed out of there. They stopped by a supermarket and bought night diapers, a tooth brush and some other things Fay needed. Amanda tried to hold it together but Fin could tell she was upset and rightfully so.
Fin was upset too but mostly angry. It wasn't all bad having Amanda and Fay stay with him though. That first night Amanda insisted on sleeping in Ken's old room with Fay but the second night Fin played dirty and used Fay to get them all to sleep in his bed. He knew Fay was a sucker for cuddling while reading a bed time story and while Amanda was in the shower he lured Fay into his bedroom and they started reading. Amanda had found them there and curled up next to them and then never left. Four blissful nights they spent together in his bed before they'd gotten all the essential furniture back in Amanda's apartment. Fin managed to find a new unicorn looking similar to the giant one she had in her room before.
Playing house hadn't been bad at all. Driving Fay to her nursery school every morning, both of them sending her off and then collecting her after work from either the school or whoever was babysitting. Making dinner together, giving Fay baths and falling asleep next to each other. They'd talked a lot about anything and everything from the news to the latest basketball game. It felt a bit like the relationship they had before Fay was born but of course Fay's presence made it even more special. She was such a funny little girl. Mostly had a smile on her face and had the ability to make you laugh in any situation. Either by some crazy move she did or making a face that couldn't keep you from smiling.
And he got to learn some new Fay vocabulary. There were still the bluebabies and strawbabies but also the waterlemon. Amanda had always called the TV remote a controller and Fay had picked it up and called it 'troller'. Fin loved it. She called hamburger 'hangaber' Fin learnt and, to his amusement but Amanda's not so much, the latest was chips which she called 'shits'. The banana was 'bamama' and water was 'wawa'. And she loved to go 'up-spy-down' and Fin loved to put her upside down but loved hearing her ask for it even more.
And as usual in stressful situations they got physical in the good way. Amanda made sure he held his hands in check while Fay was awake but once she fell asleep they fooled around quite a lot. He remembered the quickie in the bathroom fondly. She'd tasted of his toothpaste and she'd been eager to get him inside of her. The following evening it had been the kitchen counter that they paid a visit too and they'd managed to knock the dish rack to the floor. It had made an awful ruckus and they'd frozen and listen for Fay's cries in case they woke her but once none came instead they started laughing at the mess they made. Once they'd gotten the dishes off the floor they'd continued the exercise on the couch instead.
Having the two in his apartment had been great even if the circumstance wasn't all that great. He'd caught himself thinking it wouldn't be all that bad having it like this all the time. He'd even thought about how Ken's room would look if turned into a girl's room. But then the whole Mimi/Escobar ordeal had happen and his mind had been occupied with that. He knew though that Amanda hadn't reconciled with her sister. Kim had stayed away and it had been close to four months until Amanda had heard from her. Kim had sent an e-mail but Fin had a sneaking suspicion it had been Amanda that sent the first one. And then Amanda had gotten at least two texts.
"Does she still have those texts? Can we try and call her sister?" Chad asked and pulled Fin back from his thoughts.
"Yeah, sure, her phone, in her left pocket," he bent down a little but mostly gestured to Liv who helped get Amanda's phone up. Liv handed it to Fin. He unlocked it, found the messages and then handed it to Chad.
"The last one was like two weeks ago, something about Fay's upcoming birthday," Fin let him know and Chad scrolled down to find the text. Lexie peeked over his shoulder and got the phone number down on her tablet.
"Let's get you up off the ground," Liv told Amanda who seemed to have calmed down a little. She'd let her hands down off her face but still hid somewhat behind her hair. She didn't resist Liv's help though and together they got up.
"You had no idea she was in New York?" Chad directed his question to Amanda and she shook her head.
"Is it possible that Joe is her current boyfriend? Have she mentioned anyone lately to you?"
"I don't know," Amanda answered with a weak voice, "we haven't spoken in ages. Two texts and one e-mail, that's all the past six months."
"What's her relationship with Fay like?" Chad asked but Amanda wasn't sure how to answer that.
"She's her aunt but they've only seen each other like five or six times I guess," it was hard for Amanda to admit to this. She and her sister had always been so close. Joint by the hip was something she heard many times growing up. But Kim's drug use as Amanda went into the police force made the already troublesome relationship harder. Kim had gotten her in so many jams over the years Amanda had lost track of them all. Since the move to New York Amanda had drifted even further from Kim. It had been a good thing for Amanda but somehow Kim still managed to bring some trouble to Amanda and NY. This was more than some trouble though. This was the worst thing Kim had ever done. Amanda did not know why and that scared her. She had no idea what Kim was planning with Fay.
"Would she hurt Fay?" Chad asked and noticed the quick glance Amanda gave Fin.
"Not deliberately," Amanda answered.
"She is not sane or responsible enough to care for a child. We need to find her. Now," Fin said expressly.
And right then a call came out over Chad's radio. It was from one of the patrol cars outside Joe's place. They had them in sight. Everyone scattered quickly. Amanda's car with Fin by the wheel was the first one that raced out of the park, closely followed by Chad's car. Nick's car had been parked in and they got a little behind the others.
The traffic was bad and even with the lights flashing Fin had trouble getting through. He smashed his hand on the steering wheel often and yelled obscenities out the window every now and then. Amanda just tried to say calm and focus on the scenario she'd soon have her daughter in her arms and how she would never let her go ever again.
Nick got even further behind and also had trouble with traffic. They arrived to the scene several minutes after the other. The street was filled with flashing patrol cars and they had to jump out rather far from the apartment. They all saw Fin and Chad in the middle of the street though and rushed to them. Judging by Fin's now calm demeanor they figured everything was under control.
"Where is she?" Olivia asked quickly and Fin gestured with his head further down the street. Everyone's eyes went there and Liv's face broke into a wide smile as she saw Amanda sitting on the curb with her arms around Fay and the child's arms clinging to her mom's neck.
"She's okay?" Liv asked and turned back to Fin with a hint of tears in her eyes. Fin nodded.
"She seems fine. They want to check her out," Fin gestured to the ambulance that was parked near-by, "but we're giving them some time alone first." Fin sounded very relieved and Nick patted his arm a little. Everyone felt relieved. Liv had to look back over Amanda's way, the sight was truly one for sore eyes. Nick looked the other way though and spotted Kim in the door with her hands cuffed behind her back. She was crying and looked to be pleading to the uniform that guarded her door. In the back behind hers Nick spotted Joe in the back behind close doors.
"It went down calmly?" Nick asked Chad.
"Yeah. Joe ran but they got to Fay and Kim before Kim could bolt," Chad let them know.
Once they arrived to the scene Joe and Kim had already been in the positions they were in now. Amanda had called out for Fay and a female uniform had gestured her over to her patrol car. Fay had been in the back seat, calm until her mother picked her up. Perhaps she'd picked up on the stress level of her mom or she'd been waiting for a safe embrace where she could cry out. Fin had been there to put a hand on the crying girl's back before Amanda had retreated to a curb to calm herself and her daughter down. Kim had called out for Amanda, asking her to help her, that it was all a misunderstanding, that she didn't mean Fay no harm but Amanda had blocked her out. Fin had shot her a look and it had quiet her down but every now and then she cried out Amanda's name.
They gave Amanda a few more minutes alone with her daughter but they needed to clear the street so Liv walked over to her. Amanda had her eyes shut, holding on hard to her daughter who seemed to do the same to her mother.
"Everything okay?" Liv asked with a kind smile once Amanda finally felt her presence and opened her eyes. Amanda's face stayed blank for a while as she took a deep breath but then she nodded. She looked pale and drained to Liv and she understood why. Amanda let her hands go up and down her daughter's back a while and then brought her hands up to her head, getting her fingers into that wild, adorable hair of hers. She brought her daughter's head out a little so she could look at her. Instantly her face turned into a bright smile and Liv watched as Fay leaned in and planted her lips on her mom's. Fay then turned her head a little and Liv got a look at her profile. It felt good to see her, and in one piece.
"We should let the paramedics have a look at her," Liv said and Fay turned her head. When she spotted Liv she shot her a bright smile that made her tear marked cheeks stand out and two dimples emerged. Liv had to sit down on her heels and reach out and touch the girl's cheek.
"Hi there," she whispered. Fay kept smiling but didn't let go of her mother's neck. Liv met Amanda's eyes briefly and they both smiled and felt such great relief. A few seconds past by but then Liv asked if she was ready to head out and Amanda nodded. Liv made sure she got up properly as she seemed reluctant to let go of her daughter. Cragen and Nick had the biggest smiles as they approached while Fin looked as pale and drained as Amanda had just a moment ago. Chad was smiling too, happy it had all ended well. Fay had put her head down on her mother's shoulder and held on tight. Both Cragen and Nick had to reach out and touch the girl's back. Nick's hand then went to Amanda's arm while Cragen had to put his on Amanda's cheek in a very paternal way. Liv could see tears in their captain's eyes and she was sure she had some in hers too.
"Amanda," Kim's cry ruined the moment. Just hearing her sister's voice made Amanda hold on a little tighter to her daughter.
"I just wanted to buy her a birthday present. I wasn't gonna hurt her, I promise," Kim cried, "Please help me Manda. Don't let them take me in." Fin wasn't sure what he saw in Amanda's eyes but he feared she was gonna cave and he stepped in-between them to break the gaze.
"Fay needs to get checked out," he said to bring Amanda back to the present and the fact her daughter had become a victim because of her sisters stupidity.
"I think she's fine," Amanda said silently and stroke the back of her daughter's head.
"We need to make sure, she did spend time alone with him," Liv said and nodded towards the patrol car holding Joe. Amanda didn't even want to think about what could have happen but she was somewhat certain Fay was unharmed. She did nod though and she was about to turn to the ambulance when Chad stopped her.
"What do you wanna do about your sister? I mean we have to bring her in but about the charges?" Chad couldn't do miracles. Kim had obviously broken the law but he knew Cragen had influence, that had been obvious to him today as every available asset had come easy to him after Cragen and the SVU squad had arrived at the scene.
"What do you mean, you pin her for everything," Fin said and they could all tell he was upset by the question. He looked to Amanda who looked ambivalent though.
"Common, she stole your child," he said.
"Haven't we already used too much of the city's resources…" Amanda tried. In the midst of all the feelings of anger, angst and torment she'd felt today there was also a hint of guilt. This was her sister and she'd caused such a mess today. So many people and resources had been used. Resources that should have been spent on someone or something else. This was her legacy talking. The part that had been brought up thinking charity was a bad thing if it was directed at your own family. That you shouldn't take hand-outs even if you're so hungry your gut is screaming and you have to rumble through a container outside a restaurant in the middle of the night to find something to eat for yourself and the six year old that kept a look out at the corner. No you should keep your problems to yourself, never let anyone see you weak and act like everything is just fine.
"No way," Fin persisted, "this won't be swept under the rug. She stole a kid. He stole a kid." Fin pointed with a sharp finger towards Kim and then towards the car Joe was sitting in and then turned back to Amanda.
"It has to go on their records. This can never, ever, happen again," Fin was not budging and Amanda could see it clearly and she did agree with him. Kim had gone too far this time and probably earlier in different situations too and Amanda covering for her had meant she learnt nothing.
"Okay," Amanda just said and nodded barely visible. She stroke Fay's back as she'd picked up on Fin's harsh tone and didn't like it. Amanda turned to Chad and gave him a nod too before she turned and walked over towards the ambulance. Fin met Fay's eyes over her mom's shoulder but neither one of them smiled.
"You wanna…?" Liv asked Fin and gestured after them.
"I wanna talk to him," Fin said and nodded towards Joe.
"I'll go then," Liv volunteered quickly and got a nod from her captain. She caught up to Amanda just as one of the paramedics tried to have a look at Fay. Fay didn't want any part of it and started crying as she cling on to her mom even harder.
"Let's just go to the hospital, get her to a calmer surrounding," the paramedics suggested and got a nod from Liv. Liv and the paramedics helped Amanda stepped into the back and then she had a seat on the gurney. Liv helped close the door behind her as she got in after them.
"Manda," Kim cried as she watched her sister climb into the ambulance, "Please don't leave me here." Chad instructed the police by Joe's car where to bring him while Fin, Cragen and Nick walked a few steps closer to the car where Kim sat.
"She can't leave me like this," she kept crying and seemed totally unaware of the distress she'd put her sister through today not to mention how much she'd cost the city with her shenanigans. Fin just shook his head as he knew whatever would come out of his mouth right now wouldn't be anything close to nice. Kim spotted him and tried pleading with him;
"I didn't harm her. I would never. I left a note with the other kid, you didn't get it?"
"You don't snatch a kid from her schoolyard," Fin said and bit his tongue to not embellish it with curse words.
"But I left a note with the kid," she begged and she was being honest. The day after a distraught mom would come in with a note that she found in her son's jacket pocket that morning. It simply read 'I've taken my niece out for some b-day shopping. Kim Rollins'. It still didn't work as a defense. Kim left the note to a three year old after she'd sent a guy she'd just met over the fence to grab Fay. That's not okay but in Kim's mind it was. Since she didn't dare to approach Amanda after the mess she cause her last visit she tried making amends by doing something nice for Fay but it ended up causing an even bigger mess. The story of Kim's life.
Amanda, Fay and Liv arrived at the hospital at the same time as Kim got loaded in the car and driven to the station for booking and interrogation. Liv thanked the paramedic as he left them with a nurse inside the emergency room. They'd managed to take some of Fay's vitals in the ambulance as long as they let her stay in her mother's arms and so far everything looked good. Amanda wasn't looking forward of having to go through a physical exam with her own daughter though but she knew they needed to make sure she hadn't been abused in any way. Fay still didn't have enough words to describe what had happen. All she would later say about the afternoon's trials would be 'choko good' (her word for chocolate), 'funny park', 'angry dog', 'angry lady', 'was tired' and 'police loud'.
Now though they got guided up to the kids ward by the nurse and soon a doctor Liv had come in contact with before came into the room. Fay had loosened up her grip on her mom a little by now and with joint efforts the doctor and Amanda managed to undress Fay. Liv stayed by the wall but Fay knew she was there and every now and then held out something for her to watch and acknowledge. The doctor kept giving Fay props to keep her occupied as she did the examination. Liv could tell on Amanda's face it was hard for her to go through this and Liv understood. The victim being a family member or someone else you loved always made it harder.
Fay was a trooper though, letting the doctor probe and run tests. She got a little scared as they turned down the lights to check for semen on her clothes and body but Amanda knew how to calm her down. She could see the UV light herself but still didn't breathe until the doctor announced there were no traces of semen anywhere. Liv could breathe too once they knew. Fay had a slight bruise around her left wrist. Amanda imagined it came from when Kim grabbed her outside that diner or perhaps later on. Amanda knew all too well Kim could get physical and even with her slender frame she could cause bruises on adults and then surely on a kid too. Amanda stroked her daughter's wrist gently and shot her a smile once Fay looked at her.
They left the hospital under an hour from when they got there. Meanwhile everyone else had gone to the closest station and Fin and Nick went in to talk to Joe. They still hadn't learnt the news from the hospital that Fay was okay so Fin was determined to find out what kind of creep Joe was and what he'd done to Fay. Cragen let Chad and Lexie handle Kim since they had a, sure distant, but still a relationship to her.
Kim admitted to have let a drug dealer clean out Amanda's apartment earlier this year. Chad would leave this out of the transcript since it was a past offense they didn't need to add to the current one if Amanda wanted her sister's mess a little less messy. But the clean out was important because that's why Kim was afraid to approach Amanda. Whether or not it was Amanda or the fear she'd turned her in to the police that was her biggest worry wasn't really clear though. Chad had seen the text where Kim asked Amanda if she could buy a birthday gift for Faith. Amanda had answered that one birthday gift would not make up for all the toys and stuff Fay lost. Kim had caught a ride with a friend who drove up to New York and she'd planned to surprise Amanda but found her keys didn't work any longer. Of course Amanda had changed locks after her apartment was cleaned out but Kim didn't get that.
So the next thing that had come to her mind was getting Faith a birthday present and she figured it was better if she could chose one herself. That way she would really like it. Why then Kim had entered the shopping mall a couple of minutes before Joe and Fay and why she came out empty handed wasn't revealed. It was quite clear early on to both Chad and Lexie Kim's reasoning wasn't connecting. She was all over the place. Would they take a drug test it would definitely come up positive they figured.
Kim had met Joe the night before and crashed on his couch, it was apparently something she did with no concern to who the stranger was. She'd talked Joe into the surprise shopping trip but of course not revealed the entire backstory. Joe, who was caught with drugs in his back pocket, had to submit a drug test which came up positive and a drug charge would be added to his rap sheet along with kidnapping and child endangerment. He wasn't a throughout bad guy though. He seemed honest when he said he had no idea Kim wasn't allowed to take Fay from school like that. He'd figured the jumping the fence part wasn't a good sign but Kim had said it was all part of the surprise and that she'd talked to the teacher already.
In the mall Fay had used the same word for toilet as Joe's little sister did as a kid – something that sounded more like dotty than potty. So he'd just brought her to the bathroom and he swore he didn't touch her. He would never touch a child like that. He had two sisters, there was no way he would do anything to a little girl he swore. And Fin pushed him. Nick as well. They asked about the photos of Jenna and the fact she was a minor. He said she had a crush on him and she'd left them for him one day. Dropped them in his mailbox and he'd just put them in a drawer. He seemed a little flattered she had a crush on him but he wasn't interested. He liked more mature women he said.
Like Kim, Nick asked since Kim still looked closer to twenty then thirty but it got clear Kim had been the one pushing for a place to crash and she'd seemed fun so he'd let her crash on his couch. She had drugs so they had a bit of a party and then, since he had nothing to do that day, he'd tagged a long on her escapades. He regretted it now both Fin and Nick could tell. Sure he'd done the crime and would have to own up to it but it got rather obvious this was all Kim's doing. Joe was just another unlucky person that crossed Kim Rollins path. Another life she helped screw up a little further. Fin didn't like the fact Amanda was stuck with hurricane Kim in her life but he got family was family.
Once Fin learnt Fay had been cleared on the physical he felt able to let some of the anger rinse off him. Amanda, Fay and Liv were at the station once the interrogation was over. Once Chad was done with Kim he would take Amanda's statement. Joe had already been walked down to a holding cell and was waiting for transport to the prison where he would spend the night. He would get a mild sentence for the abduction of Fay thanks to the fact Amanda pleaded it out to spare her sister from going to jail. In the end Amanda wouldn't be able to sell Kim out completely and asked both Cragen and Chad to go easy on Kim. Joe had the drug charges also to own up to though and would get to sleep in a 6 by 8 for the next two months with a guy named Jorge in the top bunk.
Once Kim was taken down to the holding cell she spotted Amanda in the station and started pleading to her. Amanda, who'd never let go of Fay since she got her back in her arms, held her even closer. Perhaps used her a little as a shield. Once Kim realized the pleading wasn't working she changed strategy.
"Fuck you Amanda. You've never cared about me. You'll let them throw me in jail you… bitch," her eyes gave her away though as tears came pouring out. Since Fin was too far away Liv stepped in instead and got herself in-between Kim and Amanda. Kim was too far away to be any physical harm but Liv knew words could be just as bad. Amanda covered her daughter's ear and pressed her to her shoulder.
"You never loved me," Kim shouted as two uniforms led her out. But as they turned the corner Kim seemed to regret the harsh words and from down the hallway they heard her scream I'm sorry over and over again. All eyes in the station went from Kim to Amanda as the storm settled. Liv noticed the tears in Amanda's eyes as she tried to hide them by planting a kiss on her daughter's head. Fin had reached them by now and helped shield them a little from the nosey eyes. Chad had heard the commotion and hurried out. He gestured them over so he could bring them to a more secluded place.
Fay had started fussing a bit and Amanda figured she was getting hungry. It was dinner time and all she'd had the entire afternoon was part of a candy bar. Chad offered to send someone to get something for all of them but Liv and Nick volunteered and went down to the cafeteria as Chad started taking Amanda's statement. Both Cragen and Fin stayed in the room with them. Fay was restless but refused to let go of her mom even when Fin tried to take her. Once Liv and Nick came back with some drinks and sandwiches they took a break and fed themselves. Fay stayed in Amanda's lap the entire time but with some food in her belly she got in a little better mood and her delightful persona was yet again showing as she flirted with everyone around her.
Amanda was happy she wasn't shy or seemed harmed by today's events but at the same time feared she hadn't done her job properly. Maybe she should have made her more wary of strangers? Not this sociable and kind to everyone?
Fin noticed Amanda going somewhere in her mind and he brought her back with a hand on her arm as Fay was having fun sticking her finger in Fin's ear.
"You okay?" he asked and she gave him a faint smile and a nod.
"Try and eat some more," he urged as her sandwich was mostly untouched having helped Fay get hers into her mouth and not all over the floor. She nodded but made no attempt for the sandwich. Instead she folded her arms around the tiny body that was now standing in her lap having fun with Fin's face sockets. She was glad when Chad finally asked if they could continue so he could let them go home to a well deserved night's sleep. Everyone but Fin stayed outside the room this time around. Fay's energy was on a high with the food intake and she soon was running laps around the table. Fin asked if he could bring her outside for a while and Amanda reluctantly said okay. She knew that the faster she could get this over with the faster they would get out of there. She had a hard time tearing her eyes off her daughter though as Fin brought her outside. The door closing behind them ended it and it stung a little in her heart as she turned back to the table.
Chad could see she got anxious without her daughter present and tried to speed it up. He mostly wanted to get her side to how to handle Kim. He'd already picked up on her protectiveness of her sister and she surely wouldn't want to lock her up for too long. As they settled everything in there the detectives on the outside enjoyed the little bundle of joy. She charmed every one of them by giving each a bright smile and then Cragen got blessed with a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Like she knew who to thank for everything.
Amanda had to stay put yet a while longer to sign some papers. She'd already told the rest a few times now that they didn't need to stay put and how grateful she was for everything they'd done for her today. No one wanted to leave though. It was rare they got to work cases with happy endings so this was a treat to see mother and daughter united and safe. As soon as Amanda got out Fay would be back in her arms again and stayed there until her eyes started to fall shut. Fin took the sleeping form for a while so Amanda could visit the bathroom before they headed out of there.
Fin would drive Amanda and Fay home to their place, Cragen took a cab home and Nick and Liv volunteered to take care of some other business. With Chad's and Cragen's help Amanda had arranged so Kim could get out on bail. She'd booked and paid for a room at a motel close to the bus station and she'd bought her a ticket on the first bus to Atlanta in the morning. She would have to report at the Atlanta PD within 24 hours or Amanda's bail money would be gone. Cragen had already put in a call to her old captain, Sam Reynolds, and was secure he would help get Kim there.
Liv and Nick got Kim out of hold up and drove her to the motel. Liv made sure Kim understood she would stay away from Amanda and Fay or she'd be back in jail in an instant. And she would be on that bus in the morning if she had even an inch of consideration for her sister. Kim knew she had no compassion to gain from Liv and tried Nick instead. She pleaded with him to just let her use his phone and try and call her. All she wanted was to apologize. Kim had nothing to gain from Nick either though.
His own daughter Zara had been on his mind since they learnt of Fay's abduction. The level of disgust he felt for Kim's action was about as high as what he'd seen in Fin's eyes once they learnt Kim was behind it all. Having your child abducted was worse enough but then from a family member? From someone who should know better. No, Kim had no compassion to collect form Nick either. They made sure she got her motel key and they made sure she got to her room. They left her sitting, crying her eyes out, on the bed but still felt no compassion for her.
"Be on the bus 9 am," was the last thing Liv said as she closed the door behind them. Nick drove Liv home afterwards and not much was said. The only thing was a short remark how adorable Fay was and that they both hoped Amanda and Fay would get a good night's sleep. Liv said her good nights and waved after she'd closed the car door. Nick looked as the clock on his phone, knew it was a little too late but still dialed his ex wife's house. He needed to hear his daughter's voice, make sure she was okay.
Fin had driven straight to Amanda's apartment, which wasn't far away. He'd made sure they had a safe passage upstairs as Amanda wanted to carry her sleeping daughter herself. He watched as Amanda skillfully got Fay into her pajama without waking her up and then tucked into bed. Fin offered to make them some hot tea as Amanda took a shower. Once the kettle was done and he fixed her a sandwich he still heard the shower running and left it on the stove as he went to watch some TV. He lost track of time and noticed once he looked at his clock that half an hour had passed. He got up and walked down the hall to see if Amanda was done.
He found her in the door to Fay's bedroom and approached carefully so not to frighten her.
"Hey," he whispered and let his hand go up over her back as he saw her noticing him. She took a deep breath and he felt it underneath his palm as it stopped between her shoulder blades. He gave her shoulder a kiss, took a whiff of her newly washed hair and came up behind her so he too could watch the sleeping form in her big girl bed.
"Common, I've fixed something for you to eat," he whispered after a while. His hand had moved up over her shoulder and he squeezed it gently.
"In a minute," she whispered not wanting to let her eyes of her daughter just yet.
"You haven't eaten all day Amanda," he reprimanded. She remained quiet though, didn't move. He could feel her thoughts turning though and he was too curious not to ask.
"What you thinking 'bout?" he asked. She sighed, kept quiet for a while but then decided to let him in on where her head was at;
"I just don't want her to be afraid. Ever. I don't want her to grow up constantly worrying about the stranger, the drug addict, the beggars. The people my mom constantly warned us about when I was a child and that made me growing up so damn cautious."
"But she has to be aware there's shady people out there," Fin had to add. He swiped some loose, damp strands behind her ear and enjoyed how soft her hair felt against his fingers.
"But there's also so many caring people right?" she turned to him with tears in her eyes, "I mean this wasn't a stranger. It was family. It was my own sister. And it was my dad and his gambling that put me and my sister in that car with that maniac. My God," she whispered as it hit her, "I'm the one who's going to bring danger to her. My crazy family. And my work. I'm going to bring the crazy to her." She was going downhill fast in her mind Fin knew and saw it happen too. He grabbed her by her arms and made her look at him.
"Stop it. You will not bring anything but good to her. Sure she will try and prove you wrong once she's a teen but I know, I know, you will always have every bit of good intention when it comes to her wellbeing because I see how much you love her. She already knows how much you love her and that makes her the caring, independent and strong little girl that she is today," he had to catch his breath but was planning to keep going when she stopped him by planting her lips over his. His hands eased up on the solid grip he had around her arms as the kiss deepen. His hands found their way down and around her waist as he pulled her in. He felt her hands come up over his chest and she grabbed a hold of the fabric around his neckline. She'd missed this. Missed him. He'd been somewhat distance since that whole Mimi/Anton ordeal. Amanda feared he was still angry with her for pulling that stunt on her own but she'd been too much of a coward and hadn't dared to bring it up. She'd hoped it would just blow over one day but for the entire summer he'd been a bit absent and she missed having him around almost constantly.
After a while she separated herself from him a bit.
"You have a part in that too you know," she whispered. It felt good to hear but he didn't feel like he could take credit for a job she'd done mostly on her own. She saw his doubt and grabbed on to his neckline a little harder.
"You do!" she said and he gave her a tiny smile.
"Okay, I do bring the funny bone to her," he said quietly, "and the swag." That made Amanda chuckle but she quickly covered her mouth with her hand as she looked inside to the sleeping child to make sure she hadn't woken her. Fay remained still and Fin reached out to close the door. He didn't close it all the way though knowing Amanda would want to check in on her from time to time during the night. He grabbed her hand and led her over to the couch. He sat down and grabbed her so she followed. She landed square across his lap and he quickly got his arms around her.
"So she got your swag eh?" Amanda smiled right before his lips found her neck and started exploring it as so many times before.
"You should be thankful she got mine and not yours," he mumbled as he worked his way up to her ear and through that arousing smell of her conditioner. Amanda didn't get it.
"What do you mean?" she asked as she squeezed her chin to her shoulder to force him out and up so she could see him. She caught his face between her hands as soon as he reemerged so she could stare him down.
"Cause you got some seriously dangerous swag my lady," he said and stole a quick kiss. She felt her cheeks blush a little and it didn't go unnoticed by him.
"I do?" she whispered a bit stunned but with a good feeling in her gut. He nodded slowly as her hands fell down to his chest.
"So you and Fay got…" she left it for him to fill in.
"Some cool and gangsta swag going on." Her smile got wider as he seemed to try and look cool and gangsta too as he said it.
"And I got…"
"Head spinning, sultry, sexy swag," he said and immediately brought her down on her back so he could follow her down.
His lips found hers quickly and his tongue quickly went inside to deepen the kiss. Her hands went up around his neck as one of his found its way up under her shirt. He didn't stop until he found her breast and he let his fingers run over it. Enjoyed the feeling of her nipple harden under his slight touch, cupping her entire breast with his hand squeezing it gently. Enjoyed how every little thing he did got an effect on or from her. How she pushed up against him as her nipple harden. How she sucked a little more air out of him as he squeezed her breast. She moved slightly underneath him and he gave her space to get her hip properly underneath his. He lay down comfortable and familiar between her legs. His mouth went down to her neck and he left a wet trail as his mouth went deeper to one side. Her breath was heavy, he felt her heart pound in her chest. His hand traveled down from her breast and towards her lower region. She started objecting once he reached the hem of her pants though.
"Not when she's in the other room," she was out of breath and didn't really want to stop him but she couldn't block out her rational side. And he didn't push. He didn't have to like it but he respected the rules she'd put up. One was no sex when the kid's in the next room. There was ways he could get around it though, he'd at more than one time managed to win her over with the 'she's actually two rooms away' excuse. But he wouldn't try that tonight. Not just yet anyways. As he came back up so he could look at her he saw the kiss swollen lips and the heat on her cheeks but he could also see the grief today's ordeal had left in her eyes. Her whites had thin red lines from all the tears she'd shed today. Public tears too that he knew was even more painful for her.
He brought his hand up to her face and let his fingers run through her hair a few times to clear her face. They managed to hold each other's eyes for a while before the moment got too intimate and he gave her a quick peck on her lips before he rolled off her so his back ended up against the couch's. He kept his arms around her though and she moved slightly so she ended up in a comfortable position by his side. She kept her eyes on the ceiling as he kept his eyes on her. He couldn't stop himself from again reaching out and stroking her hair.
"You had a rough day," he said quietly as he played with a strand in her bangs.
"It wasn't fun," she said with pursed lips and then turned her head slightly towards him. He was resting his head in his other hand and he just looked very calm. She was in need of calm right now. She felt tears forming behind her eyes and she turned towards him and squeezed into his chest a bit so she could hide them from him. He knew though. He'd seen the look on her face and he knew. He put his arm around her and caressed her back tenderly. He leaned down and planted a kiss on her head. Their legs entwined as so often before.
"She's safe and sound now. Back where she belongs," he whispered. They just laid there for a while. She didn't fight the tears and just let them fall down her face as they came. She played with his shirt. Let her fingers draw lines over the print on his chest as she thought about everything that had happen today. She couldn't remember much about the interrogation she'd been in when she got called out by captain. She'd immediately seen it was serious on his face but she'd never expected it was anything but business. She'd felt her knees give way as he'd told her.
She didn't remember much then until they were in the car. She remembered Fin by the wheel and how she'd wished they'd get to the preschool alive cause he'd been driving like a maniac. And then panic again. A few very stressful hours. She couldn't help but think 'what if'. She thought about all those parents who never got to see their kids again. She had to stop thinking about that cause the tears were threatening to drench the couch if she continued. She wiped her eyes a little so everything wouldn't be so blurry. She took a deep breath and she felt Fin lean down and kiss her hair again.
"She's fine," he whispered again as he felt her body tremble slightly with the deep inhale. His words were comforting. Yes, Fay was safe and home where she belonged. She couldn't help but think about her sister though. She was still angry with her but she couldn't help but worry about her a little too.
"You think my sister's fine too?" she was almost afraid to ask. She knew Fin wasn't Kim's biggest fan right now, if ever. She heard him take a short breath and she imagined that he had a frown on his face.
"She's a big girl. She can take care of herself," he said and tried to hide the spite he felt for Kim right now. He knew she had some extenuating issues, but he was sure the drugs didn't help her mental state and the drugs were on her. And he could take, not necessarily accept or approve, but he could take that Amanda let herself get pulled into Kim's shenanigans. Amanda enabled Kim though and Fin couldn't understand how someone so bright could so easily get manipulated by someone who so obviously spoke mostly bullshit. But he never had a brother or sister so he couldn't really understand that bond. He still knew very little about how Amanda and Kim grew up but from meeting their mom and the small bits that he did have he got that it had been far from perfect.
He got that Amanda probably had to shelter Kim from a very early age and that she still did. There was a reason she kept him away whenever her sister was in town. He didn't have to like it and he wouldn't stop trying to subtly convince Amanda she was an enabler but he got she protected her sister to a fault. But this time Kim had brought Fay into it. Kim had put Fay in harm's way by leaving her with a total stranger and that's after abducting her. That was not okay in Fin's world and there was no way in hell he'll let Kim near that kid again.
"I should have listen to you. At least in lock-up I would know she's safe for the night," Amanda's voice sounded very small and she crawled closer to him in need of even more comforting. He was thinking 'of course you should have listened to me' but he didn't say it knowing she was already beating herself up enough on her own. Instead he wrapped his arm around her and held on to her tight. He laid down his head right next to hers so he could hold on to her with his other arm too.
"Your sister seems to have an uncanny ability to always land on her feet. I'm sure she's fine," he said as he let his hand run through her hair again.
"But I'm sure she's feeling regretful now and if she's all alone I don't know what she'll…" Amanda's voice broke. Fin sighed as he tried to bite down not to say anything that would upset her even more right now.
"Okay just hear me out. You've done your part Amanda. You raised your sister to the best of your ability, you've protected her in the past, kept her safe the way you saw fit. You can't do all that any longer cause just a wall away lies this precious little being that needs all that now. Your sister isn't your baby any longer, she's not your responsibility. She should never have been to be honest but we can't change that. But we can change how things will be from now on," he spoke slowly and thought about every word before he uttered them.
"I can't stop caring about her Fin,"
"No. But you can't carry her. She's not your burden any longer. She has to stand on her own two feet now. She has to own up to her mistakes and what she did today was a big, big mistake. One she has to stand accountable for to make sure she doesn't repeat it," he sounded as serious as he was. He hesitated but then decided it had to be said; "And until she's proved that she gets that what she did today was seriously wrong I don't want her anywhere near Fay." He almost expected to get punched or that she would push away from him or in some other way let him know he couldn't make demands like that. But nothing happen for a while. The room fell silent and he heard a car honk down at the street.
"I'll make sure she won't," she then whispered and Fin held her if possible even closer. Nothing more was said on the matter and they just laid there. He could feel the last of the stressful day leave her body and soon she was snoozing calmly in his arms. He would have preferred if she'd eaten something but sleep was the other thing she needed and he settle with that.
He laid there just appreciating that this day was coming to an end and that it all had turned out okay. That the kid was sleeping in her bed right now and he had Amanda in his arms. This awful day would end on a good note. He didn't take it for granted.
He started to feel himself drift away but he would soon be awaken by the loss of Amanda's warm body next to his. He grabbed for her as she was about to get up off the couch.
"I just want to make sure she's doing okay," she whispered as she took his hand in hers. He nodded sleepily and let her go. He watched her slip into Fay's room and then put his head back down on the couch. He must have dozed off again and once he woke up he wasn't sure how much time had passed by. Amanda was still missing and he slowly sat up. He yawned and rubbed his hands over his face. It took a while longer before he felt able to stand up. He walked over to Fay's door and looked inside. Amanda was sitting cross-legged on the floor close to Fay's bed. Fay was sleeping with her face turned outwards to Amanda but her thumb and blanky was covering most of her face.
"Hey," Fin whispered and hoped he wouldn't startle Amanda. He didn't and she slowly turned her head towards him. She gave him a smile and he smiled back.
"I'm gonna go lie down on your bed, you coming?" he whispered.
"In a minute," she smiled and when he gave her a nod she turned her head back to Fay.
Fin took a mental picture of what he saw and then dragged his feet to her bedroom. He lay down on top of the covers. He was so tired and his attempt to stay awake was futile. He woke up slightly though as she came creeping up on the bed a little bit later. He grabbed her as she lay down and she turned around so he could spoon her. He pulled her in as hard as he was able to still half asleep and nestled his face down in her hair the way he liked to. He fell right back to sleep.
When he woke up he was alone again though. He turned to look at her alarm clock. No more than 5 am. He needed the bathroom and as he was done he took a stroll over to Fay's room. He found Amanda right where he expected her to be. Sound asleep next to her daughter with her arm around the tiny girl's body. He stayed in the door frame for a while and watched them. He smiled as he heard Fay's faint snoring. After a while he turned back to the bedroom and lay down to catch some more sleep. Soon everyone in the household was sound asleep again. Everyone safe. Faith was back.
XXX
Did you suspect it was Kim? It was fun trying to hide the fact. Maybe it would have been a little bit easier to guess if I'd given away the clean-out during Kim's last visit but it was actually something I thought about adding since it happen in the real show after I'd posted the Mimi/Anton chapter so it was too late to change it.
Okay so now I'm going to start to wrap this fanfic up, it became longer than I anticipated. There's still some chapters to go though, the Finanda lovestory is just too complicated to wrap up in one chapter. Fin is so bullheaded ;)