Tear Down The Stars – Chapter 4
Spencer's Point of View ( I will make a note when changing views to stop any confusion)
I've just woken up and I'm lying next to Ashley Davies. She is sleeping soundly and thankfully didn't die an unfortunate death in her sleep. I pretty much stayed awake the whole night to make sure. I have absolutely no idea why I helped her considering the things she has said and done in the past. No that she remembers any of that and even though she has said sorry she still doesn't really know what she is apologising for. I get that we were younger then but she didn't make moving to a new school easy for me. At my old school was head cheerleader and I was friends with everybody but as soon as I transferred to King I realised that being nice or kind wasn't how you got popular in this place because it was all about money and social standing. Based on this fact alone I know that Ashley will wake up and be the the same Ashley she has always been towards me and I accept that because there is no way that we could be friends. Carmen would disown me to begin with, I mean she is already giving me a hard time for even working for the Davies and if she found out that I had spent the whole night watching Ashley sleep then that would be it. You may be thinking that this seems slightly dramatic and that friends should be friends no matter what but before I got to King Carmen took the full force of the mocking so she really hates the popular kids.
It's pretty early but I know that I need to get up before Ashley wakes up so that I don't have to deal with any weird conversations or more fake apologies. So I carefully remove myself from the large bed and head towards the guest room so I can take a shower before the twins wake up. The only problem I have with that is that I have no fresh clothes which means I'm going to have go home to change before going to school, just great. I take a quick shower and put back on the pj's that Ashley gave me then head down the stairs figuring that I could get the twins breakfast ready in advance. Julia had said that her husband should be back to take them to play school I just hope that happens because from what I understand he isn't the most reliable guy in the world.
As I've got enough time I decide to make some pancakes for Taylor and Darcy. They always tell me how much they love pancakes but they only get them when their Father has time on weekends which is rare. For a 4 year old to tell you that is completely heartbreaking if I'm honest.
After a while I hear the pitter patter of tiny feet running down the stairs and I prepare myself for the over excitement. As predicted both of them scream with glee as they see I'm still here and I'm making them pancakes.
"We looooovvvvveee pancakes Spencey" That's Taylor telling me this as he hugs my lower half ooffering me a still sleepy smile. He is still in his pj's but Darcy is already dressed and prepared for the day. That girl is the most organised 4 year old I have ever met and she has style too. Taylor is your typical boy and he doesn't really care for time keeping or organisation. They remind so much of me and my brother Glen that it's scary. I just hope that they stay close when they grow up because I would hate for them to as distant as my brother and I.
"I know you do little one. I have even made some with chocolate chips but don't tell anybody" I tell them this like its the biggest secret in the world and they play along like they always do. They both love to think that they are being slightly naughty and I like to indulge them.
"Ashwee likes pancakes did you make her some?" Darcy asks me and offer her a smile while I think of an answer that will satisfy her because in all honesty I had no intention of seeing Ashley at breakfast, I had no intention of cooking her pancakes but they didn't need to know that. So I lie.
"I will make pancakes for anybody that wants them but I think Ashley is still asleep and I don't think that she will won't to be woken up" I hope my answer works.
"Did she hang out with her friend Jack? Because Daddy and Mommy always tell her off for that coz she gets headache" Darcy replies with the intelligence of somebody 3 times her age but luckily I know that she thinks that Jack is an actual person and not a bottle of alcohol that their older sister is so reliant on. Before I have to reply Ashley walks into the kitchen looking slightly bewildered and shocked. I'm guessing she had assumed that last night was a bad dream which is really was. I spot a slight bruise above her right eye from where she fell and I know that the twins spot it too. She's obviously tried to cover it with her fringe but had failed miserably.
"Ashwee what happened to your head?" Taylor asked as he runs to Ashley with real concern.
"I was being a silly boo and I slipped and hit my head" Ashley lies obviously she had prepared herself for questioning. She is avoiding eye contact with me which I understand but I'm still uncomfortable.
"Does it hurt?" Darcy asks her from a distance.
"Don't be silly nothing hurts me. I told I'm like super man but cuter" Ashley explains with confidence. She has clear had to lie to them before about cuts and bruises from her adventures and they really seem to love the idea that their older sister is some sort of super hero.
"Do you want pancakes? Spencey has made chocolate chip" Taylor informs and she finally looks at me,I have no idea what her expression is and I dare not ask. Before she can answer the front door opens and after a few loud foot steps Raife appears in the kitchen. I have only met him once before because he is always working or something. The twins start screaming with excitement as they run towards their Father where as Ashley seems to get even more tense than she just was.
"Hey little ones were you good for the sitter?" Raife asks and I'm little offended that he obviously doesn't remember my name but I don't say anything I just smile my normal polite smile.
"Her name's Spencer" Ashley states with a slight annoyance. Raife stops fussing his younger children and his blue eyes land on Ashley. He eyes for a second and then he spots the bruise above her eye, she knows this and she looks as if she is preparing herself for battle the way she stiffens up all of a sudden.
"What happened to your head?" Raife asks not through concern I can tell that by the tone in his voice.
"I fell" Ashley mumbles knowing that he won't believe a word she says. I feel awkward and in the way and like I shouldn't be hearing or seeing what is going on. I feel like I'm intruding and I don't like it. Raife rolls his eyes and releases an exasperated breathe.
"Guys go eat your breakfast I need to talk to your sister" He signals for Ashley to follow him and even though they are in the hall way I can still hear every word probably because I am deliberately trying to listen.
"Ashley I can't take this any more. Did you sneak out last night?" Raife states as if he knows that this is a fact.
"No Raife I didn't. I was here all night"
"Don't lie to me Ashley"
"Jesus I'm not lying I was here the whole god damn night" Ashley argues and she already sounds defeated.
"You need to stop this Ashley. The drinking, the drugs and the pointless sex" Raife's voice is slightly more raised now.
"I learnt from the best didn't I Dad?" Ashley practically yells this and she sounds broken and tired. Before I can stop myself my feet are carrying me towards the hall way and they are both looking at me.
"Sorry to interrupt but I can vouch for Ashley Mr Davies she was here all night. She hit her head getting out of the pool when we were playing with the twins" My voice sounds far more confident than I feel and when his eyes meet mine I feel about 2 years old and completely out of place. Ashley looks at me with her hurt eyes and I know that she is begging me to leave because she doesn't want me to stick up for her.
"You don't have to lie for her" Raife tells me and I know that he is daring me to be honest but I won't.
"I'm not lying Sir" Technically I'm not because she was here all night, I would know because I was in her bed while she slept like a baby.
"Are the twins ready to be dropped off at play school?" He directs this at me and I know it's my cue to leave.
"Taylor needs to get dressed" I tell him as I leave hoping that I may have helped but all I hear is him continue telling his daughter how he wished she would grow up and be more like me. Typical that he remembers my name when he wants to use it against his daughter. I barely hear Ashley's reply but I hear the front door slam and I assume she has left.
I get Taylor dressed after breakfast and then Mr Davies pays me and thanks me for my help telling me that I will need to pick the twins up later after school. I say my goodbyes and I head to the front door. I jump back slightly as I see Ashley sat on the stoop looking far from happy, far from how she looked when she was sleeping.
"I thought you'd gone?" I state as a stand near her. She doesn't look up at me.
"Kyla was supposed to give me a ride to school but she had some test to study for so I'm debating whether to ditch or whether to brave the school bus" She tells me still without looking at me. It would be so easy for me to just say goodbye and walk away but after witnessing everything this morning I feel bad for her and I feel like I want to help her again so I try.
"I can give you a ride if you want? I've got to pop home to get changed first though" I offer and she finally looks at me. She has obviously been crying but she doesn't want me to know that so I smile my fake helpful smile at her and pretend I haven't noticed her puffy eyes.
"You don't have to do that" She tells me and I know that but I kind of want to.
"I know that but I'm pretty sure the bus sucks and smells slightly. I wouldn't want anybody to endure that not even you" I try to make a joke and she clearly appreciates my efforts as she sort of smiles back.
"That would be nice thank you" I'm taken back by her politeness and put it down to the morning she has had so far. We walk in silence to my car and I have no idea what to say so I say nothing as I start the engine and head down the never ending Davies drive way. After a mile or so as I notice the houses getting smaller and the streets getting more crowded Ashley looks at me.
"Why did you do that?" She asks me the question I don't need to ask her what she is talking about.
"I guess I felt like somebody should stick up for you" I answer and I'm surprised by my own honesty probably as much as she is.
"I don't need people to stick up for me" She informs me while regaining some of her Ashley arrogance.
"Don't worry it won't happen again" I tell because I'm pretty sure it won't. I'm almost confident that my stint as Ashley's Davies protector and care giver is officially over because it has to be. I can't keep running to the rescue of a girl who doesn't care about anybody else and never will or at least that's what I tell myself.
"Fuck I'm sorry Spencer I didn't mean to be a bitch but it's kind of my go to personality trait. I'm not good at thanking people, I'm not good a relying on anybody and I'm really not good at accepting help of any kind" Her confession shocks me and I have very little to say back. I know that her saying that to me is a huge thing for her but I don't have the right words to give her so I just smile and saying nothing. Once again we remain in silence until we pull up outside of my modest house. To me it has always just been a house but after seeing the Davies mansion it seems small and pointless. I think I actually feel slightly ashamed of my own home and I realise that I don't want Ashley to see inside.
"Is this your place?" She asks me as she eyes the white building with it's little white picket fence and perfect rose bushes. I just nod my head and she smiles.
"It looks like a nice place to live...kind of looks homely" She tells me this and I feel relieved and no longer ashamed of my lovely little house that I share with my Mother and Glen.
"You want to come in and wait while I get changed?" My stupid mouth is betraying me and I hate it.
"Is that Okay?" She seems as unsure as I do and once again I just nod before exiting the car. Ashley gets out and follows me to the front door. I know it's unlocked because my Mom's car is on the drive which means she has probably just got in from work. We walk in and I realise that I'm glad to be home. Back where things are normal for me where my Mom asks how my day was rather than accusing me of god knows what. I hear my Mom in the kitchen and I head that way. She's standing there with her long blonde hair, bright blues and scrubs on. She smiles at me and Ashley in the kind way that Paula Carlin always does.
"Hey baby girl how was your night?" She asks me and then her eyes land on Ashley who looks so unsure it's almost endearing.
"It was good actually. Mom this is Ashley, she is the twins' older sister and we got to school together" I do the introductions but my Mom always told me it was rude not. My Mom walks over to Ashley and gives her a hug, I see Ashley stiffen at the contact and I let out a little laugh.
"It's great to meet you Dear. What happened to your head?" My Mom holds Ashley at arms length as she inspects the bruise.
"I slipped last night and banged it on the ground" Ashley is as honest as she wants to be which is fine because who wants to tell a stranger that what really happened was that you got blind drunk and passed out in front of a girl you teased for a while at school.
"Did you look after her?" This is aimed at me and I nod to begin with.
"Yes I made her stay awake until she was slightly less concussed and kept an eye on her last night" I tell my Mom like I'm a reporting doctor on rounds at the hospital.
"Good. Would you girls like some breakfast?" Paula is always trying to feed my friends. I think that's why Carmen spends so much time around here.
"No thank you Mrs Carlin" Ashley answers politely and I can see my Mother is warming to her. Before I can answer the back door opens and in walks my best friend of sorts. Carmen has been my friend since I started King. She is feisty, opinionated and some times quite rude and I know that this is going to be one of those times. Her grey eyes fall on Ashley and I see a hint of recognition inch onto Ashley's face.
"What is she doing here?" Carmen snaps her angry eyes now on me. Ashley's relaxed expression has gone and she now looks just as outraged as Carmen.
"I'm giving her a ride Carm it's no big deal" I tell her and I think I'm being honest. My Mom looks between us and I can tell that she is trying to figure out the source of Carmen's rude greeting.
"Spencer don't worry I'll get the bus or something" Ashley announces and goes to leave but my Mom stops her.
"Don't be silly Ashley. Carmen we've spoken about your attitude and I will not allow it in this house. Spencer is helping Ashley out and I will not allow her to pull out of this" Paula has her angry voice on and Carmen immediately relaxes her stance and facial expression.
"I'm sorry Paula" Carmen offers the apology and I know that she won't extend it to Ashley.
"I need to go get changed Carmen you come with me" I need to kill the atmosphere some how and I can tell that my mom already likes Ashley so that shouldn't be too awkward. Carmen follows me as I had up to my bedroom and I know that there will be heated words exchanged as soon as I close my bedroom door.
"Spencer what the hell? Ashley Davies? Of all the people you could help you pick her?" Carmen looks angry and most other people would be intimidated but first all she is about a foot shorter than plus I know that even though she acts tough that she really isn't at all. She just plays on the whole 'badass, wrong side of the tracks' thing to keep people at a distance. I know this because she tried it on me but I didn't let it work. I look her dead in the eye to let her know that I won't take any crap.
"Carmen I'm giving her a ride to school. Yes I know what she has done and I know what happened between you two and that she treated us both like crap but you can't hold that against her for ever. Plus she is my bosses daughter and I need that job so just please be remotely civil just for me. I promise you that after today you will not have to ride in a car with her ever again" I have no way of knowing if that promise will ever be kept but I'm just trying to pacify her so the ride to school isn't too horrendous. I place my hand on her shoulder and pull her in for a hug. I can feel her breathe me in and I know that I should pull away but she's my best friend. I have known for some time that Carmen likes me in more than a friendly way but neither of us have ever discussed it. I think she may have tried a few times but I change the subject every time because I know that I will never say the words that she wants to hear from me. This may seem selfish but I'm trying to keep my friendship and I don't want to lose it. At one point I thought that my feelings my changed but we had a drunken kiss once and I felt nothing other than a 'friendly' feeling and I was also a little bit freaked out because it felt like kissing my sister. So we pretend nothing weird is going and we both date other people which never ends well because Carmen gets insanely jealous and scares off whatever girl I'm seeing. We finally pull away and see that she is relaxed. I throw on some clean clothes and we had down the stairs.
Ashley and Paula are laughing about something which makes me smile for some reason. Other than when she is around the twins Ashley rarely smiles and I have hardly seen her laugh before. It's kind of infectious and it really suits her. They try to stop laughing as we enter the room but it must have been quite funny because they can't contain themselves. I laugh despite myself and feels good. Carmen just has a face of stone and it makes me sad because she will never move on.
"Sorry to break up the giggle twins but we have to get to school" I interrupt feeling sad that I stopped the laughter.
"Ashley it was lovely to meet you and I beg you to take me up on the offer for dinner with us sometime" Paula gives Ashley another hug and Ashley seems more relaxed this time and actually hugs my Mother back.
"That's really kind of you Mrs Carlin...maybe one day" Ashley like me knows that this will never happen but neither of us have the heart to tell me Mother. Carmen scoffs as she walks out of the house and Paula gives me a look as if she was asking what her problem was. I know the answer but I won't tell her any time soon.
"You girls' have a good day at school. Love you Honey" She kisses me on the forehead and puts an apple in my back pack then tosses one at Ashley who catches it with no effort but she still looks surprised. I head out the door and Ashley follows I feel her hand on my arm so I stop walking.
"Look Spencer I really appreciate you being so nice to me but I understand if you don't want to drive me to school...its fine" I look at her blankly and I know that this situation is going to be horrible for all us. Carmen is scowling at us from the passenger seat of my car.
"Ashley I'm giving you a ride so just get in the car. Ignore Carmen and we may survive this. I can even drop you a block away from school if you don't want to be seen with us" I actually mean this because from what I know Ashley's rep is very important to her and I know what arriving at school with us will do to it.
"Spencer I know that your opinion of me is probably lower than ever at the moment but please believe me when I say that I don't care where you drop me. If you want to drop me around the corner fine but if you're okay with it I would rather just go to the parking lot" I am surprised by her answer and she seems to be as well because she looks at the ground straight away and seems to be mumbling to herself.
"Okay well I'm glad that's sorted come on" We head to the car and I brace myself for the car journey from hell. Once again Carmen scowls at Ashley as she climbs into the back seat and I give her a warning look. I meet Ashley's eyes in the rear view mirror and offer her a smile which she returns and that feel kind of nice.