Tear Down The Star Chapter 5
Ashley's P.O.V
I am sat in the back of Spencer's car while her evil midget friend gives me evils every time she catches my eye. I would normally snap but Spencer has been far too kind to me in the last 24 hours so I am behaving myself for her. Normally this would mean all out war. I've snapped at kids in the hall way for simply passing me and normally I don't stop until I see tears. Clearly the knock on the head last night has done something to me because I feel like I want to get Spencer to like me and I don't normally care who likes me especially not somebody like Spencer but I suddenly do, like I said must have been the bump to the head.
I think I recognise this angry Carmen chick but I can't think where from other than school. I'm going to take a stab in the dark and assume that I was probably mean to her. That would normally be the easy conclusion so I try not to think about it too much. As for Spencer's Mom she was totally awesome and I was genuinely laughing with her and I rarely laugh. She asked about me and how I knew Spencer so I lied my way through to that. I didn't want to lie but I didn't have the heart to reveal the real Ashley Davies to her. Anyway I'm sure Spencer will fill her in over their perfectly normal family dinner where Mom and Dad praise their children for their achievements...no I'm not jealous so get that thought out of your head.
That whole thing with my Dad this morning has me in no mood for school. Thinking I'll probably go to first period and then ditch the rest of the day. I'm sure I can convince somebody to ditch with me or I can walk to the diner and hang out there for the day. I'm really wishing that I wasn't grounded right now because I could really do with not going home tonight, maybe my Dad won't be there. If I have to see that disappointment in his eyes one more time I might break. He has had the same look for years now and I'm talking way before I got really bad. I mean before the drink driving, before the girls, before the impromptu house parties and before wife number 2. I tried to be good for like a few days and I got bored plus he didn't really notice anyway. At least he sees me when I'm bad and I'd rather be yelled at than completely ignored.
The car stops and I'm surprised to see that we are at King. Carmen jumps out the car without even looking back to wait for Spencer and I almost feel bad for making Spencer's day even worse. I get out of the car slowly just to make sure she is ok. As soon as she sees me moving she also gets out of the car slamming the door after her. She looks pissed and I don't think I want to see her angry again but something is stopping me from leaving...damn you whatever you are!
"I'm sorry if I caused that" I say as I stand next to her she snaps her head to look at me and I know that nice Spencer has gone.
"Ashley have you ever considered just not fucking up? You wouldn't have to say sorry as much then" She didn't exactly yell at me but the words were icy and her expression was harsh. She doesn't wait for me to react because she's already storming off. I stand still by her car and I feel like I want to go after but I stop myself because I'm sure it's just the concussion talking plus I don't know what to say. I mean she was kind of right, if I didn't do dumb things then I wouldn't be saying sorry to everybody but then again I wouldn't be having half the fun I am or at least will be once I'm ungrounded. I'm guessing after this morning that my grounding terms may have been extended.
"Did you just arrive with Spencer?" A voice asks me from behind. I spin around and see Madison stood looking at me weirdly. Madison is a kind of friend who I talk to every now and again. She can be quite cool and I think she is dating that Glen guy but I'm not sure.
"Erm yea why?" I try and sound my normal self but I feel it waiver slightly.
"No reason I'm just surprised considering everything that happened before" Madison says this like I know what she's talking about but I don't. All I know is that I was mean to Spencer which I don't really think is that bigger deal, I'm mean to most people and nobody has ever held it against me.
"I don't really remember Maddy" I admit feeling a bit dumb.
"Girl you need to stop with the recreational drugs they are frying your brain" Madison warns me and I know she's right but what she doesn't know is that I haven't taken anything since the beginning of the summer. I've kind of weaned myself off all illegal substances after one rough night. I don't remember anything other than having sex with a guy and I had never slept with a guy before then. I was what you call a 'gold star' but not any more and sometimes I cry about it but most of the time I ignore it. I turn my limited attention back to Madison as we walk towards first period.
"What did I do to her? Because she really hates me and that angry little chick that she hangs with hates me more"I confess because Madi knows everything and she isn't scared of me or my over reactions.
"You sure you want to know?" She asks and I nod. I can tell by the look on her face that it's bad even by my standards. She pulls me into the bathroom and scares everybody else out it so we have complete privacy which makes me feel worse than ever now.
"Ok like 2 or 3 years ago when Spencer started this school her and that friend were passing a note in class that I intercepted because it was rude not to really. Anyway the note simply said I did it with Ashley D last or something like that. I couldn't help but laugh because at the time you were 'straight' so we started teasing Carmen because we always had. She took it quite bad and started crying which obviously encouraged more laughter. Spencer stepped in and said that she had written the note. You got told after that class and things were said. We picked on her for months calling her every gay name under the sun and then it died down. She went off everybody's radar and well you turned out to be a raving lez anyway" I can't believe what I'm hearing for a number of reasons. First of all I can't believe I was that mean to somebody, who am I kidding I can believe it but it doesn't mean that I'm pleased with myself. Second all I know for a fact that I DID NOT sleep with that Carmen. The first girl I ever slept with was Marcy Adams on a class trip to whistler which was nearly year after Spencer came to the school. I go over the story in my head and of course I feel like an ass but that crazy little bitch was spreading rumours and she let her friend take the blame.
"Madi I didn't sleep with that chick" I stutter nervously.
"I know that sweetie" Madison tells me with a head tilt.
"I may actually kill her" I am so mad and not because she lied about sleeping with me, a lot people do that and it flatters my ego. I am mad because she let Spencer take all the pointless teasing from my idiot self and not once did she try to tell the truth. I don't think I have felt so mad about something that didn't directly affect me before and all I want to do is punch Carmen. I know that I can't do that because I would definitely be expelled especially after the locker room sex scandal last year, remind me to tell you about that.
"Why do you care Ash?" Madison doesn't know that all my actions are clearly under the control of a demon concussion and I can't be bothered to explain in full.
"Because that Carmen girl is a bitch and Spencer deserves a better friend than that" I'm shocked by my own words and Madison looks at me like my head is spinning around but I don't care.
"Dude what's that bruise on your head?" Why are people so hung up on this stupid bruise? And why won't my fringe cover it? Fuck it now I'm all angry and red.
"I passed out drunk and hit my head last night" I tell her as I rearrange my fringe again hoping my stupid fringe will stay where I want it to.
"How are you not dead?" Madison semi jokes as she reapplies her lip gloss. We have already missed the bell so we know we're late for class. No point in rushing ourselves.
"Spence kind of looked after me" I swear I didn't even say that or at least I didn't want to say it. Madison eyes me suspiciously and I know that I'm screwed.
"Can you take me home please? My head hurts" I ask because I've had enough.
"Do you want to see the nurse?" Madison can really be great when she wants to be.
"I just need to get out of here" I tell her and she nods heading back to the hall way. I know that I can't afford a sick day this early in the year but I don't care. My head is spinning and I can't process everything that is happening to me today. I just want my bed and some quiet then I'll be back to my normal awesome self or at least I hope I will be.