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Chapter 9

Charles June 1881

Age 20

Charles sat on his bed and sighed he had no idea dates could hold so much emotion to them, he held the photograph in his hands running his finger down the women's face. It never got easier the wounds were always fresh, always hurting.

February 1880

"Charles what are you doing?" Betty smiled as he took her hand and dropped to one knee in full view of everyone in the had been trying to find the courage to do this for the past three weeks, he didn't care that they were young and he was starting a new job, it would be a new start.

He hoped, his and Betty's new start.

"Betty Dawes I noticed you the first time you walked into this theatre, a year ago and I have never felt this way about anyone will you marry me?" Charles had managed this in one breath and hoped Betty had understood him, he produced a small band with a single tiny diamond in it.

"Yes" Betty smiled "Yes of course I will Charles". He picked her up slipped the band onto her finger and in his immeasurable joy and delight kissed her. The entire theatre ignored the forwardness and cheered for their happiness. Charles couldn't help smiling for what felt like the first time in months, a chance of a better life, and his rock had just agreed to marry him.

He picked up he next photograph from his box, the box were he kept all his treasured things the fob belonging to his father and a picture o his mother were among the items. He smiled sadly again a full length profile of Betty unseen to the image her red hair decorating her face in heavy curls, her dress was blue he remembered they bought it together just after she agreed to marry him. They had just booked the church for a small reception well Betty's family were in Ireland and couldn't afford to come, Charles were dead, so that left only a few witness' to be present rather than an actual party of people.

"Mr Carson" The butler of the house, Mr Roberts, looked him up and down like he was a piece of meat or an animal at a show, "You do realise you will have to give majority of you're time to the job? and we are no accustomed to taking on married footmen". Charles breathed evenly he had decided it would be better to tell the household of Betty, however the conversation wasn't going that well to be honest.

"I understand completely Mr Roberts I know when you gave me the job I appeared to be single,but I promise I can still give my all to the job" Charles shuffled then carried on, "My fiancé Miss Dawes has managed to secure a flat only five minutes away from the household and as we will not be living together until after the wedding on the 3rd of June, does it still present itself as a problem" Damn Charles speaking like that to the boss wasn't probably your best step.

Mr Roberts breathed out heavily "Well, as you appear to be living honourably and not in sin we shall say no more, but the minute it interferes with your position in the household you will be dismissed is this clear Charles?"

"Yes Mr Roberts of course"

Betty had been so happy she had an interview as a secretary with one of the local businesses, added with the fact they had their modest flat to decorate and the wedding to plan she was as happy as could be, content as anything. Charles remembered as she rushed around trying to get everything perfect.

"Betty please love slow down nothing is going anywhere" Charles reached out his arm and pulled the rushing women to his chest, the smell of paint and paste overwhelmed him, the flat was in different states of completion with Betty trying to do at least ten jobs at once.

"I just want it to be perfect Charles" Betty giggled smiling up at him "With you working at the house as well I have to do everything myself, Its only 5 weeks until the wedding"

"Five weeks woman" Charles pecked her forehead with kisses "You have everything for the wedding planned, the flat just needs the furniture just slow down please?"

"Stop it you are trying to distract me Mr Carson" She glared up at him.

"Always Miss Dawes" He kissed her long and deep relishing one of the few times they were out together and weren't under scrutiny.

"Charles..." She breathed out and slowly pushed his coat from his shoulders.

"Betty... we can't not yet" Charles stepped backwards his honour as a man kicked in, and knowing his self control wouldn't last if he stayed close to her.

"Let me make this straight you come in here distract me from work, boil my mind from that kiss and now let your morals get in the way?"

"Yes... Betty I love you and I won't dishonour you, I know I seem insistent but I won't..." Charles trailed off his speech at her look, the one that could make the devil himself break off his talk.

"Charles Carson we are, correct me if I am wrong, we are getting married in five weeks?" Charles nodded slowly, "Then the problem is what?"

"It's wrong immoral it should only happen between two people joined by god" Charles tried his voice meek.

"Charles I am catholic I know these things inside out, but I don't care we will be married and I love you what else is needed?" Betty kissed him again slowly smiling at him, "I wish you weren't the perfect gentleman sometimes"

"So do I" Charles stroked her back in long strokes feeling her arch slightly into his touch, he tried to step away but she grab hold of his suit lapels and pulled him in. "Christ woman".

They backed onto the rug that covered the floor, Betty had made quick work of his suit and shirt leaving him bare from the waist up, she began to kiss the expanse of his skin nipping along as she went. Charles involuntary groaned and flipped her so he was above her "Damn you sometimes, woman" He picked up her foot and slid off the shoe kissing the arch of her foot he slowly removed her stocking kissing every inch of bare flesh he found. Charles slowly began to unlace her dress remembering every moan or gasp he caused for further use. He pulled her dress of her shoulders and just sat back and admired the view. She was more beautiful than any picture, or scene, or object , creamy white skin that some noble ladies would kill to achieve, the almost perfect amount of curves that showed her svelte frame but still showed her femininity. The icing on the cake was her flushed face looking at Charles like she would like nothing more than to wring his neck, Betty Dawes was not a meek woman and he loved it.

"Yes Dear?" He tried.

"Tell me husband to be dearest why you have stopped?" Betty sat up resting backwards on her hands.

"Well firstly you look an absolute picture like that, and secondly there is no way I am attempting to release you from that corset without some help" Charles smiled watching Betty get more flushed, and himself getting harder as her her face changed.

"Well" Betty moved in front of him presenting her back "Firstly untie the bow, then slowly pull on the sides until they loosen". Charles pulled gently, until the corset was loose he pulled Betty's arms above her head and lifted the corset off her frame leaving her in a thin shift.

"Excuse me Mr Carson? Shouldn't you be worshipping said back now?" Betty giggled arching beautifully so her muscles were taut and inviting. Charles simply obeyed kissing every inch trying to elicit her beautiful tones from her.

Betty took him by surprise by turning over and reaching for his belt buckle, Charles just sat their frozen, she was slow as she pulled the leather from his trousers and carelessly chucked it aside. Her fingers worked the buttons slowly and surely. He hadn't thought it possible but he breathed just that little bit quicker, was strained against his shorts that little bit more, his breath almost stopped as she pulled his trousers slowly down and off after removing his shoes.

They could have sat like that for moments, or hours or years Charles wouldn't have been able to tell. He slowly leaned her back kissing the swell of he breast with deep kisses, her hand deftly reached for him holding him tight and rubbing, he bucked "Hells woman" she giggled at his response pulling him in for another kiss.

Charles inched her shift upwards pulling it off in a fluid motion "Absolutely beautiful" He breathed into her neck, tracing his fingers down until her reached her core decorated with the same vivid red as her hair on her head. Slowly he inched his fingers into her centre gently rubbing her stomach as he went.

"Charles..." Betty arched delight taking over her features "Please".

He added another finger and slowly worked them watching her face exchange between delight and discomfort, she gasped as he lapped at her nipple slowly savouring the little bud rolling it over his tongue.

"Please I'm ready" Betty begged, he smiled not at the begging but the fact she was so ecstatic, she began to push his shorts down with his foot impatiently. He breathed deeply he knew this would hurt her no matter how gentle he was. Still caressing her stomach and breasts with feather light strokes Charles pushed into her slowly but surely gaging Betty's reactions. He prevented himself from just going the full way and rocked gently letting her muscles adapt to having him inside.

"My Beautiful Betty, my love, my life" She responded by kissing him groaning at the friction it caused. Charles pushed and felt her stiffen with a whimper. "Shush my love the worst is over" agin he stilled his actions until she punched him gently in the shoulder.

"I am not a wuss Charles move or I may kill you" Betty breathed her eyes closed.

"Of course milady" The next few minutes were a mixture of pleasure Charles didn't imagine was possible the tightness of Betty, her voice the way how she tightened against him and slumped pushed him off the edge.

Charles collapsed on top of her as she brushed his hair lazily with her hand.

"What were you making such a fuss about?" Betty teased smiling.

Charles just lifted his head to smile back.

Charles smiled at the memory he still remembered it so vividly, it was a strange experience the first time, she was beautiful and completely his, that night no sleep was attained by either person. Not by the loving but just by Charles holding her them talking about nothing really plans, dreams, memories it was the delight that was more intoxicating the felling of togetherness.

Especially after his days at the house, the position of footman was a respected one, but he was the new bot the one they thought they could boss around, they didn't know if he could be trusted, the fact he had Betty on his arm every time they went to church apparently made him less popular too, but Charles didn't mind he had Betty and the respect of Mr Roberts and Mrs Fisher. Betty sneaked in to visit him after he left work the flat was complete now and they laid talking or just being there together was enough.

"I found out today that the theatre may be closing down" Charles stroked his hand up Betty's back tired after a day at the house.

"What for?" She asked interestedly.

"Behind on rent payments, at least you will be out of there by next week"

"Marvo... acl..lous" Betty began coughing solidly without breath, it had become more apparent to Charles lately but the doctor just said it was a violent cold. He rubbed her back trying to release some of the pressure of her muscles.

" I am fine really... I Just need to carry on taking my medicine and I will be right as rain for the wedding, don't fuss" Betty tapped his chest face flushed and eyes watered.

"Alright love if you insist, It's a good job you have everything sorted".

"See preparing paid off mister" Betty coughed again for a solid minute, Charles stroked her back feeling useless so he kissed her forehead "I love you Betty Dawes"

"And I you Charles Carson"

It had been only three days later when Helios had come in his normal dress of billowing shirt and green trousers looking as out of place at Eaton Place than if a man in roman dress was there. He remembered that Helios had just stood there seeming to search for the correct sequence of words, then the worst came "She's dead Charles, Betty, she caught this epidemic from the water near the theatre about two hundred have died". Charles had stopped listening after the first few words and just slumped to the floor in the servants hall the shock numbing the tears, he recalled people trying to talk to him but nothing registered she was dead his Betty, his love. The hole in her heart that she had stitched up after his mother death had been ripped open again twice the size the emptiness the loss. She had only been a mere two days off her 19th birthday.

3rd June 1880, Charles was meant to be waking up to marry the girl of his dreams. One of the most happiest days of his life had turned into one of his worst. He was waking to bury her, his wedding suit still hung in the wardrobe next to his suit of black, the red cravat almost mocking the situation he was in. He had said Betty was to be buried in her wedding dress and veil the outfit she had spent hours and hours choosing, the golden band still on her finger, he would never give a ring to another women so she should keep it along with his heart. In the chapel of rest she truly looked like an angel her hair stark and red flowing against the pale white of the gown, the veil adding a mysterious air over her peaceful features. The service was at the same church they were to be married in, the same people invited to the wedding attended, her two cousins, her aunt and Charles dire to say how much love and kindness she had shown every single person she had met, as her coffin was laid into the ground at St Martin's the tears finally came silently not waves of grief but as a wash of numbness. He moved into his room into Eaton place the next day after removing his things from the flat. Leaving their dream behind, his chance of happiness.

Here lies Betty Dawes

30th May 1861 to 28th May 1880

Aged 18

Loved family member and fiancee

May She Rest In Peaces

The gravestone was paid with his first set of wages a small granite stone, simple and modest compared the the vibrant woman it represented. Betty had got Charles his job, out of the theatre on her simple belief, she had shown him love and light in the darkest of times, and know she was laying in the ground without so much as a reward for her actions. Charles had questioned his fate at several certain times during his short life but at the moment he was certain God and his justice didn't exist.

"Goodbye my love" He placed a hand on the gravestone and returned to the house, it was all he had left, his mother, love, fiancee, heart, soul and pride were all gone.

Charles finished putting on his livery for the day ahead, it had been a year and he couldn't forget her. The maids had seemed to grow an interest in him but he couldn't escape the hold Betty seemed to have on him, even now, he didn't want to forget her love, it was all he had left, that and the two photographs. Their entire relationship remembered by photographs and an ache in his heart and soul.

As he joined Mr Roberts in the upstairs dining room his face was impassive the tears he had shed this morning only a memory just like everything else. The upper footman Richard was leaving in the new year and Charles was the top candidate for his job, the pain and loss had helped his impassiveness and professionalism to flourish.

After all it was all Charles had left every other memory was in a wooden box under his bed.