I Want You to Want Me

Chapter 12: You Give Me Butterflies

Starfire had just about enough of her inability to erase Robin from her mind last time we saw her. And as for Robin, he was completely oblivious to how Star was feeling, as he was to Summer's true nature, and everyone's true hatred for her. Wow, he's pretty clueless. Yet we all love him, including Starfire.

That night, she felt unappreciated. She was invisible. Robin didn't know she was there anymore. She had told him to stay with Summer, but she didn't think he would do so, so quickly and without any regard for how Star might feel.

She woke up the next morning around nine; it was Sunday, the slow day. And so she moved at an extremely slow rate. She hadn't slept well. Her head had been clouded with bad thoughts and bad dreams. She didn't wake up with the same resolve she had the morning before. She rose and undertook her daily routine. She sat gloomily on her bed, with nothing to look forward to. No one to care and no one there. As she heard Cyborg call her to breakfast she glanced at the clock with longing, water filled emeralds and decided it best to attend breakfast. She rose and made her way to the bedroom door and as she turned the knob she remembered her disturbing dream from the night before. She was back on her world, left the titans as Summer had wished. People were worshipping her. She was the princess of Tamaran, sitting high and mighty above the masses, with a tear streaked face, alone on her pedestal, living proof that to have loved and lost was not better than to never have loved at all.

Robin had yet another night without sleep. He just kept replaying Starfire's outburst and pain and then how he completely ignored her. But he had to, right? Summer had told him that Starfire and Raven were both really jealous and that she felt like he was paying a little too much attention to Starfire, she even threatened to break up if he didn't stop paying attention to Starfire.

At first, the offer was appealing, but then he remembered that Summer was the only one for him. Besides, if he really wanted Star that badly he would feel like he needed her and he didn't. He hadn't felt like that at all. Or at least not thus far.

Raven smiled when she poured herself a cup of herbal tea. Summer was such a sucker. She knew that Summer didn't buy the whole, 'I'm sorry' thing, but Summer had fallen right into her trap. One, Summer had forgotten that Raven could read minds. And thanks to this ability Raven was able to see Summer's past, including her recent time spent with Robin, some of which involved her telling him how jealous Raven was and how threatened she was by Starfire. Robin had bought it, after all, why wouldn't Summer be threatened; he cheated on her once already. Anyway, number two; Raven saw that Summer wanted to get rid of Star, by means of her party. She not only wanted to ruin her party and make her believe she had no friends at the tower, but she also wanted to find her someone new, someone she would invite and make Star fall head over heels. So Raven decided that she would prevent the party ruining and would help Summer pick the guy. And that guy would preoccupy Star and teach Robin a lesson in how important Starfire is to him (which Raven knew he wasn't understanding after having read his mind as well).

Raven had to think before she invited Summer to help. She had to find a guy that reminded Starfire of Robin, but would do anything for her. A nice, handsome guy. A hero. A gymnast. An athlete. An arrogant little twerp. A sidekick. And most importantly, mysterious. And as she searched through her mind, and the mind of her colleagues, including Robin, to find someone who met this description and could make Robin jealous and out do him, she stumbled upon a very interesting specimen.

And so, as Summer invited every hot guy she could find to seduce Star and to use as a boy toy on the side, she took the bait. And now Raven sat at the breakfast table enjoying her tea, flipping through the pages of a very intriguing and grim novel and smiled yet again. All was going to be right in the world. She would have Beastboy. Starfire would have Robin, if she still wanted him, and Summer would finally be on the street.

"Who's stupid know," Raven smiled into her cup as she thought of her masterful plan and the words of the wicked witch who inspired it.

Beastboy and Cyborg were confused. Raven's plan was not making any sense. Mind you, she hadn't explained it to them saying that, "You two will blab," or, "It's far to complex and perplexing for boys with your brain capacity," whatever that was supposed to mean.

They were really wondering if Raven had lost it. She had been smiling and saying nice things about Summer and how great it was that Summer was able to help them plan the surprise birthday party for Starfire. They were beyond confusion at this point; as they continued cooking breakfast for the team on Sunday morning. Raven was smiling and sipping her tea contently while occasionally murmuring to herself.

"Don't' worry boys," she suddenly said, breaking the uncomfortable silence. "I've taken care of everything. There's nothing to worry about. If things go okay Summer will be gone by Wednesday, Friday at the latest."

"Raven, we'd like to believe you," Cyborg said uncomfortably, "but you've just been acting so, so-"

"-So weird! You sure you know what you're doing here?" Beastboy asked for Cyborg.

"Trust me," she said with a smile and then returned to her novel and ignored the expressions that the two exchange before returning to their preparation of breakfast.

"Oh, by the way, can you do me a favor Cy?"

"Sure Raven, what's up?"

"Can you call everyone for breakfast, it's gonna be great." And with that she returned to reading and Beastboy and Cyborg again looked at each other with nothing but confusion on their faces before Cyborg complied to Raven's ordinary, yet strange, request.

She could her that weird metal man calling out to her and at the same time made her name sound so terrible. She could her the hate in his voice as he called for her to wake up and come and eat some breakfast. 'Bet they poisoned my food the no good losers,' Summer thought as she sat up in the bed. She had spent yet another night in the guest room, which she now labeled, her bedroom. Although she was absolutely pleased that Robin was allowing her to keep this room as her own, she was still ticked that he had yet to invite in his bedroom. However, she did not freight over the subject. She looked around the sunny bedroom and looked out the window to see the bright and inviting day. She felt; well, nothing, mostly because Summer is sometimes incapable of feeling anything at all.

She decided that she would dress nicely for breakfast this morning. She wanted to look really cute so Robin would want her and Starfire could be jealous. One might wonder, doesn't Summer feel even a little sorry for Starfire? The answer would be a definite no. Whenever Summer was in the mood to feel and there would be this twinge in her chest, where most people's hearts are located, but she would simply remind herself, "that it serves the little tramp right," since she had made out with Robin and nearly cost her a good boyfriend. She then remembered that she hated that little scumbag. She was the very bane of her existence.

She went and showered and dressed and avoided seeing anyone both to her displeasure (because she liked telling off those weirdoes) and surprise (because this place was practically a freak breeding ground). She made her way to the kitchen to find her handsome boy toy standing near the counter, where Starfire happened to be sitting, and looking at her with regret, sorrow and mostly heartbreak.

He looked at her now and felt so stupid for ignoring her. When they had bumped into each other in the hallway on their way to breakfast he apologized saying, "Star, about last night, the way I sort of ignored you, I'm really sorry."

She smiled. She hadn't smiled in a while. But he could see that her smile was lacking its normal luster. She answered him in a whisper before the doors slid open, all the while looking down and not facing him "I forgive you."

And just when she thought he was back he continued, "it's just that I wanted to be there for you, but Summer was upset too," and he trailed on as they walked through the doors. 'Her again,' Starfire thought to herself, having been expecting him to say that. She knew that Summer had used some power she had over him to erase her very existence from Robin's mind in the period of a day. She couldn't understand what power it was that Summer had over Robin that made him forget about everyone around him and only think about her. It was more spectacular and distressing than any evil force she had ever before encountered. She sat at the counter completely ignoring his every word after he had spoke her name. She knew that she needed Robin, but he didn't need her anymore. And that was what he was trying to get to in a nice way, but she didn't need to hear it. She didn't want him to speak. She didn't want to hear him say it. She just knew what he was thinking. So, she sipped her orange, poured by BB, and ignored him.

And when he finally realized that she hadn't listened to a single word he looked at her with such distress and yearning to help her that when Raven took notice she felt very moved and knew that he and Summer weren't meant for each other, Robin just didn't know that yet.

Summer ended his staring spree by kissing him on the cheek and cheerfully asked the group, "What's for breakfast everybody?" Her plans had to work. They just had to. She needed to get rid of Starfire, immediately.

They all sat down and enjoyed yet another silent meal. Every person's mind moving a mile a minute and every person smiling at those around when they each had ulterior motives.

Then Raven's plan was set in motion; the doorbell rang. Raven nearly dropped her fork when it happened. Yes, she knew it was going to happen, but there's nothing quite like hearing it happen for yourself. She turned to the unfazed, day dreaming Starfire. She was poking at her food with her fork, looking as if her very soul had been sucked out of her body. She no longer held any sort of glow. Raven felt so sorry for her, but pushed her emotions aside and asked the hopelessly in love hero, "Star, could you go get that?"

At first she ignored her then when Raven repeated it, Starfire looked up with shock and confusion, asking Raven with her eyes why she had to get the door. Regardless she stood up and left the room to get the door, commenting as she exited, "Be right back." No one moved. No one cared. No one heard. And she was invisible.

Starfire made her way to the elevator and rode it all the way to the first floor. She leaned against the elevator walls and sighed. She felt so empty. So alone. And she knew that she was never going to even be attracted to anyone for the rest of her life. Yup, her life would consist of eating, sleeping, fighting, and crying. Not much to look forward to, but it would have to do. At least until she died. And she already felt like she was dead.

And the elevator doors opened and she made her way across the room to the front door. As this emerald-eyed member of the walking dead approached the door she fixed her hair, trying to look somewhat normal. She could only hope that it was Summer's dad coming to take her back home. Or a doctor from an asylum come to take back its crazed patient. Or even a police officer, here to pick up their escaped convict. Or the host of a television show coming to tell her that it was all a prank, Summer was a paid actress and for enduring her she won a large sum of money. But these were only dreams. And as Starfire knew very well by now, dreams don't come true.

She finally made it to the door. She turned the knob and said, "hello?" She didn't expect anyone like him to be standing there. She was taken aback. She started at his feet and made her way up to his face. She looked into his eyes. He wasn't wearing his mask. He wasn't playing the superhero right now. She suddenly felt this feeling that she hadn't felt in so long. He smiled at her warmly making her feel so beautiful inside and out. She just didn't know how to describe how lovely he was making her feel inside. He was like an angel.

"Hi," the angel spoke.

"Hi," she said in a little more than a whisper, not taking her eyes off him.

"So..." he said. The air was awkward for them both. He took in her appearance and she just smiled. A real smile. She hadn't done so in so long. He was captivating to her. And as she continued to look into his eyes she became lost. Then she remembered, it was her turn to speak.

"Can I help you?"

"I certainly hope so," he said without thinking. She giggled. She hadn't giggled in so long, it felt like. "I mean, I'm here for a party or something."

"I see."

"So, are you going to let me in?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Well, I don't even know you."

" Oh, yeah. Silly me. I forgot. I'm Roy. A friend of Robin, Cy, and BB. We go way back."

"I see," she said, the smile on her face not fading one bit. When the two of them looked at each other all they could see from the other was this glorious light that they were giving off. And the light that they other gave provided the most happy and sweetest warmth ever thought possible.

As Roy continued to look at Starfire he couldn't believe that as he looked into her eyes, that he felt like she was the only thing he needed in his life. He didn't even know how to describe how lovely she was or how wonderful she made him feel. Before he continued to admire her appearance he realized that she had said something.

"Pardon?"

" I said to come in and follow me. I will bring you to my friends."

"Sure," he said as he began to follow her with the most dazed expression possible on his face. She couldn't help but smile when they entered the elevator and she noticed him fidgeting.

"What's your name?" he asked her suddenly.

"Why do you wish to know," she asked coyly. He smiled.

"I don't know."

"Well, I don't go around giving my name to strangers."

"Strange? Me? No way. Besides, I told you my name."

"Yes, but how do I know you aren't lying? As I said moments ago, I don't even know you." She smiled.

"Then I'll just have to guess."

She giggled a little.

"Let's see, a pretty name for a pretty girl." She couldn't help but blush.

"I know, Beautiful?"

" No. I'm, afraid not." She said with a small smirk on her face.

"Oh. Well, it should be," he said simply. She couldn't help but look at him with a blush and respond, "Oh, th-thank you. For that compliment."

"Compliment? Hardly, I was stating a fact." She giggled and blushed a deeper shade of scarlet. Before the compliments and this dream come true could continue the elevator doors opened and Roy had already stepped into the living room. Starfire followed behind him with a dreamy expression. She felt like she was flying through the clear blue sky with no worries or pain in life. She felt happy again. She felt like she was in a dream she was about to wake up from and after looking at Summer and Robin and everyone else, she suddenly crashed landed back to earth.

"Friends, we have a visitor." Beastboy and Cyborg turned around and jumped out of their seats to greet the young hero and fellow titan.

"Hey Speedy, how you been?" 'Speedy?' Starfire thought. 'He can't be? Can he? No, he said his name was Roy. He's the one they met at that hero challenge? Wow, he is so…amazing.'

"Yeah, man, how are you? And what're you doing here?" Before he could answer Raven said as a matter of factly without looking up from her novel, "He called earlier this week and said he wanted to swing by and say hello. After discovering who he was with a little mind probing I said it was okay. So, here he is." Starfire didn't buy it. She knew that everyone was planning her a surprise party after Beastboy spilled the beans. She suspected that was the party he referred to at the front door and played along. He was probably invited to fill up the room.

"Oh," Beastboy replied simply. "So Robin gonna say hi to your twin or what?"

"Of course," Robin said as he stood next to the breakfast table and shook Speedy's hand. "Hey Speedy!"

"Hey Robin."

"Introduce me babe," Summer said.

"Oh, babe this is an old friend, Speedy-"

"Call me Roy."

"Hi," Summer said flirtatiously. Robin didn't even notice, but Speedy did.

"So you're?"

"Robin's girlfriend."

"Oh." 'Good,' he thought.

"Glad you could come by Speedy, but where's your mask?"

"Where yours should be, put away and airing out." That got a chuckle out of almost everyone in the room. Most especially Starfire. She had always thought Robin spent too much time working and felt like a part of him didn't really trust her because he would never take his mask off in front of her. She found it quite wonderful that Speedy could find time to stop being the hero and just be Roy. She smiled at him with warmth and adulation.

And Robin noticed this too. He picked up on it almost immediately and frowned ever so slightly, much to Raven's delight.

" So, you've met Rae," Cyborg said pointing to Raven, "and well this is Starfire."

" Starfire huh?" he said while moving towards her, " Not quite beautiful, but close enough. So it would seem that you're from Tamaran?" She smiled. Robin frowned and sat down at the table.

" And it would seem that you are a liar," she said, smiling all the while.

" How so?"

" You told me your name was Roy. And it seems that you are Speedy."

" It may seem that way, but trust me, I'm definitely Roy. But you can call me whatever you want." That brought a small giggle out of Starfire and everyone took notice.

"Do you say that to everyone?"

"Nah, just the pretty girls." She giggled again and said, "Here, I'll show you to your room."

"I'm excited," he said with a mischievous smirk on his face. Robin didn't like this answer. It had more than one meaning, that innocent, naïve Starfire didn't pick up on.

She picked up one of his bags, after he asked her not to, saying he was a gentleman, and then she walked out to the hallway, with Speedy on her heels.

After the two exited Summer said, "well, I like him. Robbie pooh, I've got to go now. I need to go home and get more clothes; I'll see you tonight or tomorrow. I'll call. Bye babe." And with a kiss on his cheek and a gag from Beastboy, she was out of the door. Robin just stood by the table, still staring at the door, which he had been doing since Speedy had exited with Starfire.

"Well, wanna play game station and have me kick your butt, BB?" Cyborg offered to end the silence.

"You wish," and so the two jumped onto the couch beginning a mindless game, sure to last hours. And as they played, Raven and Robin finished their breakfast, and BB and Cy continued light conversation.

"Well, it's nice to see him again," Cyborg, said while pressing buttons with his hands moving faster than a speeding bullet.

"Yeah. And he still looks almost exactly like Robin."

" No he doesn't," Robin said in a whisper full of disgust.

"Is something the matter bird boy?"

He simply growled and mumbled while playing with his food.

"Is someone, I don't know, maybe, a little, um, JEALOUS?"

"Yeah right. I don't' get jealous. Besides what would I have to be jealous of?"

"Nothing, nothing of course," Raven said while diverting her smiling face to the pages of her book, leaving the boy wonder to poke at his food, agitated, not knowing the reason why.

"Well, here you are, Roy," she said as she entered a code and the doors slid open. His room was across the hall from Robin's.

"Nice. Very Nice."

"So I am assuming that it is to your liking?"

"Yes. Everything here is perfect," he said while looking only at her.

"Yes, well, we aim to please," 'Oh, Starfire,' she slapped herself mentally, 'that did not come out right. You are in love with Robin, not Speedy, I mean, Roy. Right? Right? Maybe?'

He simply smiled. And as she looked at him she couldn't help but feel something in the pit of her stomach. 'But Robin doesn't love you,' a voice in her head stated. She knew it was true. He had moved on without a second thought. He had found someone else and happiness. Maybe it was time for her to do the same?

"So, uh, thanks, Starfire."

"Please, call me Star."

"Okay, Star. That suits you." She smiled at this comment. He stepped towards her. At first she was afraid and didn't know how to react, so she took a slight step back. But once he took another step she stopped moving. She wanted him to come closer. She didn't want to move away from him. He was right in front of her and opened his angelic mouth to say, "Excuse me Star, but, uh, can I have my suitcase. I kinda want to unpack."

"Oh, yes, of course," she said as she snapped out of her trance and attempted to mask her disappointment. She handed him the suitcase and as she did so their hands brushed. There was suddenly a tingling. There was a sensation. It was nothing like she had experienced when she kissed Robin, that was unparalleled, but it was amazing in its own right. As she kept thinking about this she looked into his eyes and noticed that he was staring at her. She looked down from embarrassment.

"Well, perhaps I should leave you to take care of that."

"What?" Speedy asked, taken slightly aback.

"Do you not wish to unpack your suitcase anymore?"

"Yeah, I do. So…"

"So, lunch is around twelve and dinner at five."

"Thanks."

"I welcome you." They both smiled at each other and Starfire exited the room.

Starfire returned to her room and fell back onto her bed with such happiness and exuberance that she felt like she needed to scream, with joy of course. She stared at the ceiling and felt so, so…the feeling was indescribable. She hadn't felt like this in a very very long time. And she wanted this feeling to last. She wanted to hold on. And just when she thought things couldn't get better, there was a knock on her bedroom door.

She shot up and fixed her hair while opening the door. And there he was. Robin.

"Robin. This is an unexpected visit."

"Yeah." He was fidgeting. Robin doesn't fidget.

"So…"

"Oh, I was just going to thank you for your understanding about last night and…" and as he continued Speedy stepped next to him in the doorway.

"Hello Roy," Star said, completely cutting Robin off and turning her attention, and body, towards Speedy. It wasn't done on purpose, however, Robin was a little peeved.

"Hey, hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"Actually-"

"No, not at all."

"Cool. Well, Star I was wondering if maybe you wanted to hang out today. You know, give me the grand tour of the tower and stuff."

"Actually she-"

"I would love to. I will meet you in your room in ten minutes. Then our tour will commence."

"Alright. See you then. And, uh, Robin?"

"Yeah?"

"You okay, you seem, I don't know…"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Alright. Later guys."

"Bye," Starfire said with a dazed expression while watching Speedy's retreating figure.

"Hello, Star, earth to Star, come in Star!"

"Oh, yes, you were thanking me for something or other and well I welcome you Robin, but at this time, I need to fix my hair."

"Thanks for your forgiveness, but uh, what do you need to fix your hair for?"

"Well, it's a little frizzy."

"No, I mean, we aren't doing anything or going anywhere. You're just going to give Speedy-"

"You mean Roy."

"-Right. You're just giving Roy a tour, right?"

"Yes."

"Then what's up?"

"What do you mean?"

"Come on Star, I'm your friend."

"Yes, but I still don't know what you mean."

"Yeah you do."

"No I don't."

"Do you like him?"

"Of course. Do you not?"

"I like him."

"Exactly. Now I would love to chat, but I need to find a brush. Bye," and with that she closed the door while he was in mid-sentence. Robin couldn't explain it, but he felt this strange tingling in his stomach and it was nauseating. He felt sort of neglected and he didn't know why. Maybe it was because Starfire didn't answer his question. Or maybe it was because Starfire was ignoring him. He didn't know. So he turned around and went to the gym to work out.

Starfire immediately ran to her dresser and began to brush like a madman. She suddenly had this urge to look cute for Speedy, I mean, Roy. She wanted him to like her. Not as more than a friend though. Of course not. She didn't like him like that. Nope. No way. No how.

After making her hair tame she checked the clock on her wall and realized that she still had five minutes before the tour should begin. She didn't want to go now. She would look desperate or overly excited, which she wasn't. She was just extremely happy. That was all. So she decided to continue enhancing her appearance. She reached for some lipstick and blended it gently with her natural rosy lip color, making attention go to her pretty pink lips.

And finally it was time. She had to hurry though; no time to put her makeup away, or else she'd be late. What would Roy think of her if she was thirty seconds late? She didn't want to know. She had to make a good impression. So she had to leave now. It was going to take some time to get to Roy's room, and so she was off, but as she reached the door there was Speedy.

"Hi. I was just coming to find you," she said trying to close her door so that he wouldn't notice the makeup sprawled across her dresser.

"Yeah. I couldn't wait. So ready?"

"Always."

And so she gave him the tour, showing him the library and the other titans' bedrooms and the various floors, as the two got along famously, telling jokes and having lots of fun. But mid way through the tour Speedy asked, "Uh, Star?" He seemed a little nervous.

"Yes?"

"I'm hungry. You? "

"Yes. I am feeling the hunger as well."

"Oh, so since I'm hungry and you are too, um, want to get something to eat?"

"Sure. Off to the kitchen."

"How bout we go to a burger joint or something."

"Burger joint?"

"Yeah. McDonald's, BK, you know fast food."

"I see, yes let us enjoy the rapid food." And after a few chuckles from Speedy the two were out of the tower and out into the city. Starfire had learned so much in her past years on earth, mostly thanks to Robin, but there were obviously things she was still unsure of, and much to her luck and joy Speedy was there by her side ready to answer all of her questions. And he loved every minute of it. They enjoyed their burgers and French fries and then wandered the park and the city while discussing their families and how they became the heroes that they are now. They had left around eleven thirty that morning and now it was well after three. So the two decided that perhaps it would be best if they went back to the tower.

"We should probably go Roy."

"Yeah, they might send out a search party."

"Ha, yes. You are a very good friend."

"Thanks. You too." And with that they headed towards the tower. Speedy walking next to that beautiful girl who he hadn't been able to take his eyes off of since he arrived at the tower. And she hadn't been able to stop thinking about him either, but he didn't know that. He just wanted to be near her. He just wanted to be closer to her. And he saw how stressed she was. He saw the way she was uncomfortable around Robin and his girlfriend when he first came in. He saw that everyone in the tower was a little less than satisfied with Robin's choice of dating, but he didn't say anything. He just wanted to be around her. And he didn't know why.

And as he pondered this, while walking towards the shore of the city, Starfire couldn't understand why she enjoyed being around him as well. But she knew that she enjoyed his company more than anything.

And dinnertime was fast approaching on this Sunday evening. Raven reading her novel, watching her beloved boyfriend play video games with Cyborg; Robin working out in the gym, not understanding why he was a little angry with Starfire; Speedy staring at Starfire as he walked her to her door and agreed to meet her there in fifteen minutes for dinner; and Starfire staring at Speedy, not understanding how he could make her feel the way she felt right now. She began to close her bedroom door to change her clothes as Speedy said, "Well, I guess I'll see you around? Huh?"

"It would seem that way," Star replied with a smile, and she closed the door and leaned against it. Feeling something in the pit of her stomach. Feeling joy. Feeling like Speedy was her destiny. Feeling like he was made for her. Picturing Speedy's face in her mind. Saying to herself, "You give me butterflies."

Hey people! Well, I know its been an excruciatingly long time, but I had a term paper for school that had to be done so Fanfiction time was put on hold, but to make up for the long wait I'm going to update with another, although it's a shorter chapter, very soon. So enjoy it! Thanks for the reviews! Sorry for the long wait! Hope you enjoyed it! Review please, it makes me update! Later!

Lovin' It,

LILY