I Want You to Want Me
Chapter 22: It's My Party and I'll Cry if I Want To
Friday. The day had finally arrived and every titan team member was in bad form. Starfire, the unsuspecting birthday girl, was still deeply confused by what she had done wrong and also by the recent absence of Speedy. Whenever she asked to spend time with him, he would hurriedly reply that he had something else to do and would see her later, only later never really came.
Robin was in a better mood, however. Although things with Starfire were slightly frustrating and he wanted her to tell him to leave that thorn in his side known as Summer, he had no other complaints, mostly because Summer wasn't to be found all day Thursday. Sure, she came in once or twice and asked if he wanted some company or to make out and when he said no she merely shrugged and exited his room, leaving him free to dream about Starfire and relieved from her constant nagging.
Speaking of nagging, Beastboy couldn't stop himself from doing just that to Raven on Thursday evening. He knocked on her door, he offered green tea, and he even presented the possibility of harming himself for her enjoyment. To this, Raven only said, "Tempting, but no," which was a change from her normal monosyllabic reply of "no".
Cyborg was probably the only person in the tower who greeted Friday with a smile and some excitement. Today, his dear friend, whom he spent so much time talking with on the phone, would finally come to the tower. Although he was indeed happy to be seeing this person again, he was a little apprehensive because he didn't know if they wanted to see him anymore.
Nonetheless, Friday was here. And everyone knew what he or she had to do. They had made up their minds. Today was d-day.
"I'm going to dump her."
"What?"
"I've already decided… there's nothing you can do about it."
"But, that's not at all what we had planned," Summer whispered with venom over the phone to Speedy. Lately, the two of them had become very good friends and she preferred his company to Robin's. As for Speedy, he liked the things that Summer did for him, things that Starfire wouldn't do in a million years.
"I know that's not what we planned, but she…if you had heard the things she said to me Wednesday. The things that the two of them discussed. And whenever I look at her now, I don't know. I just…I don't love her, I barely like her, but he's won."
"So you're really going to just dump her."
"She's not worth all this trouble anymore. No girl is."
"Fine. Leave her. But we can still teach her a lesson she'll never forget. And when she's crying, on her birthday no less, Robin will be pissed too. Especially since you're the one who hurt her. So, wait."
"How long?"
"Well, that all depends. What time does the party start?"
Now he had been thinking about it for the past few days now. Why didn't she want to be with him? Why was she staying with Speedy? Why was he still with Summer? These questions had been swirling around through his brain and he had come to a reasonable answer. He had figured that a part of Starfire still really liked and cared about Speedy and she didn't want to lose that security that she felt she had with him. Especially since a part of her probably still had problems believing Robin since he had hurt her before.
And God, how he hated himself forever slightly betraying her trust ever. All he wanted was Starfire. He had finally told her and she still couldn't believe him. The thought alone was utterly frustrating. Completely maddening. Absolutely exasperating. But really, there wasn't much he could do. That is except once and for all erase whatever traces of doubt still lingered in Starfire's mind. And he'd do it tonight, at the party with her birthday present. It was his one and only chance to prove he loved her. And it was perfect. But then again, so was she.
It would be only a few hours before the party got started. Everything was in place. All the guests were somewhere in Jump City, the caterers were ready to bring in the food (including a giant tub of mustard, spicy to be exact), the decorations were hidden in the basement and the only tiny little detail left, the part of the plan that desperately needed to be thrown into action, was the stalling of Starfire. Raven needed to single handedly figure out a way to get rid of Starfire for the next few hours, then somehow get her into the tower and dressed up, and then have her wander into the living room. The only question now in her mind was how she was supposed to do all of this.
Yes, of course Raven could stall Starfire for a few moments. It was a very easy task. The problem was that this needed to take place for much longer than just a few moments. Starfire needed to be gone for hours so everyone could put up the decorations and arrive. But how?
Raven knew the answer to this question instantly. And it stayed in the back of her mind no matter how hard she tried to push it out of there completely. It was a last resort, really. She really didn't want to do it. She hated the idea. She just couldn't. Besides, she wasn't in the mood at all. She was busy being in charge and trying to ignore Beastboy, plot revenge on him, and get rid of Summer all at the same time, and it was very stressful. The only thing in the world that could intensify this stress was Starfire screaming with joy and excitement, which was sad, but true, which only provoked Raven to further erase the idea. But as the minute flew by and time's truth reared it's ugly head, she realized she had no other choice. She warned Cyborg mentally, and he knew what to do. She left his mind as she sensed his laughter. His laughter targeted at her. Regardless, she pressed on. She had to. There was no other option. It was time. Time to…go to the mall.
It was time. He had to do something about this little falling out they had had. It was driving him crazy. He never saw her anymore. And when he did, she would completely ignore him. And when she actually went so far as to acknowledge his existence (which in her mind was an inferior existence) she merely shook her head or uttered a "no."
"NO." That word had become a curse. It was ruining his life. If only Raven knew the effects of that word perhaps she would stop saying it. Stop yelling it. Stop spitting it at him every chance she got with complete disdain.
He had told her once before, he missed her. But all that didn't matter to her anymore. The only thing that mattered was the fact that he had hurt her, told her that she was annoying, that he didn't enjoy listening to her speak. In essence, that he didn't like spending time with her.
He had been such an idiot. So tonight, he would be on his best behavior, after all, Beastboy was out of ideas. All he could think of doing in order to not completely lose Raven would be to behave well. To not annoy her. To do everything she wanted him to. To make sure that she understood that he was sorry and missed her. He had to get her to see these things, before…someone else came along.
Starfire entered the living room with Speedy on her tail and automatically noted the tension in the air. Something was going on, but Starfire being Starfire she assumed that it was the fact that her friends were at the moment in relationship turmoil. So she shrugged her shoulders and put on her normal sparkling smile, which Robin noticed right away and began to melt, and walked into the room saying, "Hello friends."
Everyone noted Starfire's lack of enthusiasm in her "good morning" but knew that if it wasn't about the Robin/Speedy situation, then it was about the fact that her friends had forgotten her birthday. This only heightened everyone's (except Raven, who really wasn't all that excited) excitement for the time when she came back home to find her birthday blast.
Anyway, Raven walked over to Starfire and Speedy, who was attached to her hip, and said, "Hi Starfire."
"Hello friend Raven."
"Well, um I, uh. Look, Speedy-"
"-Roy, please,"
"Whatever. I don't actually care. The point is, could you go…away…like now. I want to talk to Starfire." After he looked at Raven dumbstruck for a few moments, she glared and he walked away, claiming that he left something in his room.
"Finally. Look, Star, I…well…feel… bad… about what I said the other day. It was none of my business."
"No Raven, I had asked you for help and then blew up at you."
"No, Star. Really. It's my own fault, I had no right to say that when I did."
"But you were stressed out and-"
"Starfire," Raven said, becoming irritated and frustrated with Starfire trying to take the blame and prolonging the inevitable. "I was wrong. That's final. So, to make up for it, I thought…maybe…we could…gotothemall," she finished in less than a whisper.
"What was that Raven?"
"I said, wecouldgotothemall."
"What? I do not comprehend what you are-"
"Fine! Do you want to go to the mall?" She then braced her self for impact. And at that very moment Starfire jumped and hugged Raven with more strength than Raven thought was actually necessary.
"Oh, I would love to venture to the mall of shopping with you!"
"Oh joy."
"Let me grab my things and we can leave immediately. Oh, this will be so much fun. It is just what I needed to relax!" And with that, Starfire was out of the room, flying down the hall.
"At least one of us will be having a good time."
"Good job, Raven," Robin said.
"Thanks."
"Now, when you take her out, keep her out until six."
"I know."
"Then tell her you want to take her out."
"I know."
"Like to dinner, or something."
"I know."
"And let her get dressed up."
"I know."
"And bring her down at seven and-"
" Hey! Birdbrain! I've got it. Okay? I know what I'm doing."
"Sorry. I just want everything to be perfect, you know. No screw ups."
"Like I've said before, I know. Remember who you're talking too. It's not like I'm Beastboy."
"Hey! I'm right here, Raven!"
"I know."
"So Robin, want me to go get the supplies from downstairs?" Cyborg asked, changing the subject back to Star's party.
"Yeah. That'll be great."
"Alright, I'm going. And yo Rae!"
"What?"
"Try and at least pretend like you're having a good time doing girl stuff."
"Stuff it tin man."
"Alright, I'm out of here."
"Okay Raven! I am ready to leave!"
"Alright, that's your cue."
"Great. Time to die. Have fun boys." With that last note, Raven entered the hall to find Starfire smiling from ear to ear and her excitement practically radiating off of her.
"Let's just do this already."
"Yea!"
Now Robin hated Speedy, but for the purpose of getting everything ready for the party, he was willing to put their hatred for one another behind them and just focus on Star, their favorite subject. However, much to Robin's surprise and joy, Speedy could not be found around the tower. He was missing. So he continued on without the archer and relished in the moments he spent in his tower without Speedy in it, trying to take his girl away from him.
His girl? His girl? Had he really started calling her that now? Even though, they were currently barely even speaking to each other. It didn't at all seem like she was his girl, but he felt possessive of her nonetheless. Even though it sounded wrong, he couldn't help but feel like Starfire was his property and Speedy was guilty of theft. Oh after this party he'd finally be rid of Speedy (because he would be back at titans east) and could finally be with his love.
But until that time came, he had to focus on organizing the party, putting up decorations and stop daydreaming about Starfire's possible reactions to his present.
"So Starfire, where to first?"
"Oh, Raven, I am so overwhelmed with joy that I am currently unable to choose."
"Great…"
"Perhaps the Victoria's Secret?"
"Sure…"
"Raven? Who is Victoria? And what is her secret?"
"Don't know. Don't care. Let's just go in and get out as soon as possible."
And so the two friends made their way into the array of lingerie. (Yes, that does rhyme, weird, huh?) Anyway, as Starfire gasped at the serious lack of clothing and the amount of money earth women were willing to spend on it she had to tell her bored counterpart how she felt, because, well, she's Starfire and that's what she does.
"Raven?"
"Yeah, Star?"
"Thank you." Needless to say, Raven was taken aback slightly. She didn't know how to respond to someone saying thank you and in such a sincere way. But she dealt with it as best she could.
"Uh, you're welcome." Starfire merely shook her head and began to look through the bras. And as she did this, Raven couldn't help but look at her not understand how after all of the troubles she had been having in the past few weeks, how after her best friends had seemed to forget her birthday, how after she was unable to choose between two lovers, she was still the same old Starfire. Happy, compassionate, loving, and thanking her friend who in no way deserved to be thanked. After all, if you took a look at Raven at this moment, like she was now, you'd see she was betraying her friend, who trusted her wholeheartedly, that she was angry with her boyfriend for telling her that she was meddling in other people's lives, that she had meddled with people's lives and only made them worst.
Suddenly, Raven came to the conclusion that she should be feeling terrible about this. I know, Raven deciding that she should feel? It's rare but it does happen. So she was becoming consumed by this strange feeling that after a few moments she could only conclude to be guilt or remorse. Whichever one it was, let's just say that she wasn't exactly elated about feeling it and wasn't exactly welcoming it with open arms. So she stood in the middle of the cosmetics section inside the little Victoria's Secret fighting this thing that she was allowing to bubble up inside of her.
She tried to convince herself that she didn't want to feel bad for Starfire or angry with herself, but she could do no such thing, because, you see, Raven wanted very much to feel bad to punish herself. And as you might have even guessed, she didn't know why.
She looked over at Starfire who was holding up different colored bras with floral prints and strange patterns while holding an expression that very much resembled confusion. She was so innocent. And here was Raven taking advantage of that innocence. She was no better than Summer. She suddenly wanted to puke and not the normal 'Beastboy stop trying to be funny or I'll puke,' but really wanting to vomit.
"Raven?" Ah, thank Azarath for Starfire's kindness. Even when Raven was "betraying" her, Starfire still managed to help her out by saving her from, well, herself.
"Uh, yeah Star. What's up?"
"Which of these undergarments do you think most suits me?"
"I, uh, don't think you're asking the right person for their opinion here. Starfire. Perhaps a salesperson or maybe someone else around her…" she trailed off into a whisper while looking around the store for someone to save her from this situation.
"But, friend Raven. I do not know any of these people and it is your opinion that I trust. Not theirs." Great. Could she try any harder to make her feel guilty?
"Uh, fine. I like the red one."
"Very well, then I shall purchase it." This was going to be a long day.
Cyborg just couldn't relax. There were far too many things going on today. Maybe if it was a normal day he could just go to the gym and train or maybe even play a few video games, beat BB a few times to cool him off, but they were too busy today. Besides even if there was time for all that, he didn't think he'd feel up to doing any of it with so many things weighing on his mind. He felt sick and excited at the same time. He was worried the decorations wouldn't be up in time. He was afraid that he would offend Batman, or Galfore, or someone important like that.
He was also worried about his two best buddies. There were both stressing out just as much as he was because they both wanted the girl of their dreams back and that just didn't look like it was going to happen at all.
And then of course, there was the fact that Cyborg was having girl problems of his own. He was in love. In love with the most beautiful, brilliant, smart, tough girl you would ever meet. She was everything he wanted in a girlfriend, but he had always been like Beastboy and Robin, afraid that she wouldn't want him back. So, to compensate for his hatred for himself and the fact that she didn't want him he began to pretend to hate her. They argued, they fought, and they glared until one day, her being the genius she was, figured out that something was wrong here and asked what his problem was. After several threats to beat it out of him he finally confessed that he was head over heels in love with her and had been since, well not day one, cause really on day one he was kind of hating her…a lot, but he was definitely feeling something for her by day two. And the funny thing was that by some luck, by some miracle, by some phenomenon she returned his feelings. She felt the same way too. So after sharing a kiss that lasted for a good twenty minutes, he headed back to Titans Tower and their daily phone conversations began.
They started out great. They would call each other whenever they had free time, but their lives, their jobs, their friends were all so demanding and since this was supposed to be a secret the incessant talking on the phone had to be shortened to a mere one or two phone calls a day in rotation. They were no longer about passion, or missing the other person, or just wanting to hear their voice and make sure that they were okay, they were now scheduled, preplanned, and given an allotted time.
Eventually, even those were becoming difficult for the two, whose teammates were constantly prying into their lives. The truth was he had missed her as soon as he entered the tower. He had only just gotten her and she was already being taken away. He felt lonely without her on days when there was no crime, and he got the distinct feeling that she was out fighting crime, leading her team and just not even thinking about him. So he became angry with her. And for only a feeling he had. So their next few conversations were cut short by arguments. Talks of visiting each other all but disappeared. And both began to yearn to tell others about their problems, but couldn't. The fact of the matter was that they had a secret and just couldn't keep it any longer. So she cracked and told Speedy one day after apologizing for snapping at him for no reason at all. And when Cyborg found out he snapped. He just felt like she didn't want the relationship as bad as he did. And that's why he had argued with her before that tense dinner with the titans. That was why he felt so down and so alone. That was why he didn't know if they were together anymore.
Her words just kept replaying over and over again in his brain, "Well maybe I don't want to see you anymore! If you see me at Star's party, I'm there for Starfire, not for you. So you mind your business and I'll mind my own. Later, Sparky!" And with that Bumblebee had hung up on him and now he was struggling to relax and get ready for the party that could very well be his last chance to get her back. So, you see, he and his dudes were all in the same boat at the moment and it was going straight up shit's creek, heading for a waterfall, with no paddle.
"You're going to wear that?"
"Yeah. I mean, I figured that Nicole Miller was completely appropriate. Why Roy? Does it look terrible? And be honest because I'll know if you're lying. I'm not retarded like Stardork," Summer said while holding up a long, red satin Nicole Miller dress and looking at Speedy with concern. And no, the concern wasn't for him, it was for herself. She wanted to look good for this party. No, not just good, amazing. So good that Starfire looked like trash next to her and she was the real center of attention at the party. So naturally, when Speedy, or Roy, or whatever made it clear that he didn't like the dress, she had to question her lasted boy toy, who's opinion on hair and clothing she had in the past few hours learned to trust more than anyone else's.
Meanwhile, Speedy was thoroughly enjoying his exploration of Summer's bedroom and house. He had come over instead of helping to decorate for Starfire, the girl whose pants he was never going to get into's, birthday. He needed to clear his head, he felt like kissing somebody, and since he wanted to know what the hell Summer had been talking about over the phone he rushed over and after some couch time with Summer he explored her huge house, no, it was not at all a house. It was a mansion. The biggest mansion he had ever seen, and well the only mansion he had ever seen without the help of his television.
He nearly fainted when he entered Summer's huge bedroom. It was entirely pink and had little rhinestones everywhere. It was like entering the home of Elle Woods in 'Legally Blonde.' Everything from her laptop to her carpet to her canopy over her bed to her telephone was pink with little rhinestones. So after raiding the mini fridge in the mini living room in her bedroom, he inspected her giant LCD TV and then checked out the humungous speaker that connected to her hot pink iPod with Summer engraved on the sides and written in rhinestones above the screen.
"How about this one, Roy?"
"Wear something pink, it looks good on you, and nothing that looks like you were trying to hard. Okay? I'm trying to watch the movie."
"Hey, this is my house, my room, my TV. Got it? Piss me off and you're out."
"But you think I'm a good kisser and don't forget that you need me for whatever your little plan is to pay back Star and Wonder Boy."
"Shut up," he had her there. She could only feel herself become slightly excited with the prospects of the party. Starfire would be left with no one while Summer would have Robin back, if she wanted him still. So she ignored his smug look and carried a smug look of her own and wore it with pride while holding up a pink sequined dress and saying, "Perfect. As usual."
"That was most enjoyable, Raven."
"If you think so Starfire," Raven replied in her normal monotone voice without even a hint of excitement or indifference to Starfire's last statement.
"Oh, please. Raven, you know you cannot say that you did not enjoy the mall of shopping even a little bit."
"Okay," Raven said with a small smile, "I have to admit I had a little fun, especially when we went into Hot Topic and found that t-shirt with our pictures on it."
"See? Shopping can be most enjoyable. We should do it more often. Do you not agree?"
"Well…" She was seriously about to say no, but after looking at Starfire's cute little puppy dog face that was just longing for her to nod in agreement she couldn't. "…Okay, maybe. But there has to be at least a month in between visits. Deal?"
"Very well." The two had had a blast while shopping in reality. Raven had even gotten over her moodiness and began to enjoy herself once they went into Spencer's and began to joke about the weird and, um, interesting things inside. She was indeed fully enjoying herself until she received a phone call from Robin. The boy seriously needed to relax. If Starfire didn't take him Raven thought she might have to kill herself. Or better yet, and more to the point, him. He was completely freaking out for no reason. So Cyborg and Beastboy wanted to take a break to get something to eat? So what he couldn't find the banter that said, "Happy Birthday Starfire!"? And did she really care that the guests being late was distracting him from his current task, which was to figure out in which color wrapping paper to wrap Starfire's gift?
"So where is it you want to go to eat, Raven?"
"Oh, um, it's a nice restaurant, down town. I read about it in the paper. It's real ritzy, so dress up."
"Very well, but I am still unsure why you wish to venture down the town for dinner instead of just eating with the boys."
"Well to tell the truth I want to make up for the fact that I forgot your birthday. Sorry."
"Oh… I am…" Raven braced herself for Starfire's explosion that she knew would occur. It would be either full of anger, which was a scary thought, or full of tears, which was the worst thing that could happen. Raven didn't know why she said that. She finally realized that her guilt hadn't disappeared quite like she had thought it did. So this was her conscience (damn nuisance) trying to compensate. She would have to remember to have a long talk with her sensitive side during her next meditation. But back to listening to Starfire.
"I am most thankful and grateful! Thank you, Raven!" That hadn't happened at all like how she had seen it happen in her mind. Well, that was a relief.
The girls walked into the tower after Raven sent Robin a mental signal, letting him know that they were coming any second, so they should act natural or pretend they weren't there, knowing very well that he was probably going to die from too much stress.
Upon hearing this news, Robin went completely crazy, yelling to Beastboy and Cyborg, and of course the Titans East, and Summer, and members of the Justice League, and Galfore that they were coming inside so everyone should shut up and hide. It was a difficult task for Summer who was wearing a sequins pink dress that came only two inches below her butt, however, it was easy as breathing for Batman, who just stepped backwards once and disappeared completely into the darkness, leaving Cyborg with nothing to say but, "Damn, he's good."
Meanwhile, Starfire had been told by Raven that she had to go and get dressed quickly because they had reservations and were running late. As Starfire fumbled through her closet, trying to find something beautiful to wear (in case she saw Robin) before heading down to living room, where she was to meet Raven, Raven had entered the living room and was given the loudest "Surprise!" that she had ever heard. After everyone said, "Oh, it's just Raven," she found Robin. Well, actually, Robin practically attacked her after appearing out of the darkness.
"Robin!"
"Is everything set up? Is she ready? Is she alright? She doesn't know, does she? You think she'll like the new banter?"
"Whoa! Take a breath, okay?"
"Sorry, I just-"
"-Want everything to be perfect. I know. God, you must really like her, huh?"
He blushed.
"What's this? The boy wonder blushing?"
"Shut up."
"Only because Starfire is coming."
"What? Coming?"
"Yup, down in the elevator right now. Perhaps everyone should hide again?"
"Everybody! Hide! She's coming right now." And again Batman disappears into the darkness as if it were nothing; the only person to rival him in doing so was Robin, followed by Raven, who was suddenly being chatted up by Aqualad. This sight caused Beastboy to just stand in the middle of the living room in shock and anger, until Cyborg grabbed him and forced his little irate green body under the coffee table.
At this same moment Starfire was making her way out of the elevator and towards the living room where she would meet Raven, and was hoping to bump into Robin. She was still a little angry with the fact that Robin had told her off without even thinking about how she felt, but the fact was that after thinking about their last confrontation it was a great deal her fault as well. In all honesty, they both shared the blame for their now semi-hatred for one another. The truth was that she still loved him whole heartedly. The truth was that she was seriously thinking about dumping Roy (she was planning to ask Raven for her opinion on the situation at dinner before following through with the plan in any way, shape, or form). The truth was that she couldn't get him off her mind or hate him even if he tried. After everything that had happened she was still completely head over heels in love with Robin, the boy wonder. She wanted to be with him more than anything in the world, and the only thing that was currently holding her back was the fact that she didn't want to hurt Roy and could never hurt anyone in her life, that is unless they were a baddie and really asking for it by harming others, but even then she never hit anyone directly with a starbolt. She just wasn't that kind of girl. But at the same time she was so sick and tired of pretending that Robin being with Summer didn't upset her, that she really loved Roy, that she didn't love Robin. Because in reality, there was not one person on this earth or on her home planet that she wanted more than Robin. Because in reality, Robin was her ideal. Because in reality, he was the quintessence of perfection.
Everyone was growing impatient. But most importantly Robin, Cyborg, and Beastboy were growing impatient. Cyborg had tried to talk to Bumblebee earlier, and she basically, to put it gently, blew him off. He said, "Oh hey, B. I didn't even see you there," with a smile and in response she said, "Good," and walked off to introduce herself to the Flash.
Cyborg felt like trash. Completely unwanted. Completely disregarded. Completely…dumped. He felt like he could just cry, but instead it was time to hide and he noticed Beastboy and pushed his own feelings aside to help out his fallen comrade.
Beastboy was in the same situation as Cy; he was feeling like crap. He was going to try and act mature and apologize yet again and hope that Raven would notice and ask him to be her boyfriend again, but it seemed Raven had plans herself. She finished talking to Robin and instead of coming to insult him; she began a conversation with Mr. Pretty boy himself, Aqualad. What!? He thought that Aqualad was his friend! Sure, they had started out hating each other completely, but they had made up and become good friends! Or at least he had thought so. Man, that Aqualad was such a backstabbing little pretty boy! He had known all along that there was something up with that guy. No regular dude hangs around with Tram the fish man in their free time.
The fact was that he wasn't that angry with Aqualad, but he was pissed off with Raven. How could she!? They weren't even officially broken up yet! How could she just go off flirting with some other guy, who clearly wasn't nearly as attractive as he was? It made no sense. He, as Cyborg had felt moments before him, felt like crying. He had lost his chance now. She had moved on! Nooooooooo!
"Yo, BB, we better hide, Starfire is coming," Cyborg had said to him and at first he was going to curse him out and tell him to go drown himself in motor oil, but then he saw that Cy too was hurt, and then thought about Robin. Poor Robin. If he didn't hide, Star's party would go wrong and then Robin would lose his chance to win her back. And he didn't want that to happen for two reasons. One, he knew how it felt and wished that feeling upon no one. And two, he was afraid of Robin. Robin would hurt him if he screwed this up. And badly too. He had seen the punching bags after Robin was done with them. Scary thought. So he allowed Cy to push him under the coffee table.
And at that very moment everything suddenly became very quiet. There was no movement. For Robin, things were going in slow motion. His breathing had become deep and heavy. There was no sound except for a few hums in Starfire's voice resonating from the hallway. All he could do in this moment was hope. Hope for things to go well. Hope that she would enjoy her party and forgive him. Hope that they could finally be together.
The doors were opening now. They were slowly separating and the light emitting through them was almost as heavenly as the person coming through the doors. Starfire stepped through those double doors in her knee length peach colored, strapless dress and matching flats, her hair was out and had a matching clip, and Robin couldn't breathe. He tried as hard as he could to inhale or exhale, but his body wouldn't allow any such thing. He was suddenly becoming very aware of the silence. And at that very moment, when he felt like he was going to die if he didn't get some sort of oxygen into his lungs, the heavenly entity before him spoke.
"Hello?" she started in little more than a whisper, confusion clearly written all over her face. "Friends, are you here?" She was worried. It was obvious by the movement of her eyebrows, the small crease in her forehead. Her lips, more ruby tonight, probably thanks to lipstick Robin thought, were in a pout and emerald eyes glittered in the hall lights as she began to tear with worry for Raven. Worry for Beastboy and Cyborg. And worry, at least he hoped, for him too.
She finally reached for the switch and flipped it and at that split second everyone jumped up shouting loudly, happily, wholeheartedly, "Surprise!"
Starfire lowered her hands, which both were holding starbolts. She at first was frightened, but looked at all the people who were there. She caught sight of the banter hanging above the living room with bright pink and purple letters spelling out, "Happy Birthday, Starfire!" and she momentarily began to feel as if she could just cry. She was overwhelmed with joy.
"Friends, I thought that you had all forgotten my date of birth."
"Well, that was the idea," Raven said, actually smiling and wearing something other than a robe, but instead a blue dress.
"I do not know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything," Robin said, finally finding his voice which he had lost during the voluminous "Surprise!" He didn't know why at that moment he was moving towards her or why he was smiling so much or why he felt happy and embarrassed at the very same time. But he did know that she was happy and that made him happy.
"That's right little lady. All you got to do sit back and enjoy the party," Cyborg added, snapping Robin out of his trance.
"Dudes! Can we party already? I'm starving here!" And with Beastboy's hunger cry, everyone began to dance and enjoy their food.
Needless to say, Robin was pleased with himself thus far. Everyone seemed to be having a great time. That is minus Beastboy and Cyborg who were finding it increasingly annoying that Bumblebee was conversing with Flash more than anyone else, and Raven with Aqualad. But aside from those two, everyone was having a great time.
There was that moment when Starfire was trying to make Speedy smile after a small argument and he just sort of stormed off, gaining the attention of mas y menos and Galfore. And of course there was Summer. Sweet Summer. Who did indeed look fabulous in her sequins dress that was barely there. Why if she wasn't such an evil, hateful little tramp, Robin might have wanted to dance with her and get to know her better. Unfortunately, he knew her well enough. She strode over to him.
"Baby, hey. Do I look great or what?" her question was really a trick, unbeknownst to Robin. She was deciding, should I or shouldn't I go through with the plan? And after asking him this and seeing him ignore her to look over her head at Starfreak and her weird alien monster friend, she knew that the plan was definitely a go.
"Babe?"
"What? Oh, yeah, dress is nice."
"I know. So…can I meet Batman?"
"Uh, maybe later…" And with that he began to walk off and towards Starloser.
"But, baby, hey…" and she took this moment to storm off into the direction Speedy had went off into.
Would he really be interrupting if he just walked up and asked her a question? He just wanted to get her alone. Get to talk to her. Get her to be his again somehow. But how? Regardless, he pushed past everyone and made his way towards her. The girl, who although stronger and taller than him, he loved.
"Uh, hey Rae. Aqualad. What's up guys?" he had done it. He had initiated conversation. Well, sort of.
"Oh hey Beastboy, I didn't even see you," Aqualad said. What was that supposed to mean? Was he trying to be a smartass? So now he was pretty and smart? This was evident by the fact that Raven was smirking at his last sentence. Not that she hadn't been thoroughly enjoying what he had been saying before. She was laughing at every word that came out of his mouth, but not the way she laughed at Beastboy. No, she was not laughing at Aqualad, she was laughing with him. And it was infuriating.
"Yeah, hi. Um, I was wondering if I could speak to Raven for a minute."
"I don't mind. I'll go get some punch." And with that pretty boy was gone. It was now just Beastboy and Raven.
"What do you want?"
"Look Raven, I've been a complete idiot, and um, man this is hard, well, um, see the problem is, I uh, I kinda, sorta, in a way, uh, miss…you."
"…That's touching. Really. But I don't have time for this right now."
"Raven!" he said, grabbing at her arm, and was happy when she did not pull away.
"What?"
"I'm sorry. Okay? I don't know how else to say it. I can't have fun here without you. And I've been trying. I hate seeing you talk to…pretty boy over there. I…miss you." She didn't know how to respond to that. He had been so serious while saying it she had almost forgotten it was Beastboy. She did care for him. She was just scared of opening up again only to have him hate her.
"You hurt me." He nodded.
"I know."
"Don't do it again," she said while moving in to hug him, despite her inhibitions, finding herself truly trusting someone with her emotions for the first time in her life.
"Star…" Robin found himself saying in a whisper before he could stop himself. He was completely embarrassed to have said her name in such a husky voice, especially around her surrogate father, Galfore, who had now turned to look at him with a look that was a mix of anger and confusion.
But that moment of embarrassment went away as soon as Starfire brought her emerald eyes to look at him. He felt like he couldn't breathe again and he liked the feeling. She smiled when she saw him, his hair slicked back and tamed and wearing a suit.
"Galfore, if you will pardon me for a moment."
"Yes, of course little one." And with a final look of what looked like a knowing smirk at Robin, Galfore made his way towards one of his guards.
"Uh…hey." he wanted to slap himself for his sudden inability to speak the English language.
"Hello Robin. You look quite handsome tonight."
"You do too. I mean, pretty. Well pretty doesn't really describe how you look actually. You look, well what I mean to say is," he was stumbling over his words like a toddler. She was starting to look at him oddly. Probably wondering why he sounded like such an idiot. He took a deep breath and finally said, "You look beautiful, Star."
She smiled at him then. She practically glowed when she smiled like that. He had missed those smiles. Those bright ones that he used to tell himself only belonged to him.
"Thank you, Robin. Would you like to dance?" he couldn't stop himself from smiling now.
"Uh, yes. As a matter of fact I would love to." He took her hand and led her to the makeshift dance floor. He spun her once and pulled her close. Her head immediately went to rest on his shoulder and his hands immediately went to clutch at her waist. He found himself taking in every ounce of her. Her scent, her hair, her skin. Everything.
She pulled away for a moment to look at his face and smile. And here. Just here is where he decided that he loved her totally. There was nothing about her he did not love. And he would die if she ever left him.
"This is by far the best birthday I have ever had." She said smiling at him. She loved this. Being near him like this. Being able to just touch and hold him. She took full advantage of the situation and brought her right hand to rub up and down his left arm. He stiffened when she did this. It amazed her, the effect that she had on him, that her touch had upon him.
"It's not over yet," he said looking at her with a serious expression. Only she could read his expressions like that when he wore his mask. It was like she could see into his eyes anyway, as if she could see into his very soul.
She looked at him to, tempted to kiss him, but knew she could not do so here. Not in public. Not when she was still dating Speedy and he still dating Summer. So instead, to restrain herself she pulled him close again and rested her head against him as they continued to dance.
"I'm leaving her…tonight," he whispered into her ear. She was certain she heard wrong. She did not move her head from him. If she had been hearing things and he had instead said he was staying with Summer forever she wanted to enjoy her last moments with him. Moments like this in pure bliss.
"I do not believe I heard you correctly," she said. He pulled back to make her look at him and after looking around and seeing everyone oblivious to them and Beastboy and Raven happily dancing with each other, he spoke.
"I'm leaving Summer."
"Robin…"
"And I'm not asking you to leave Speedy."
"Roy."
"Whatever. The point is I don't care about him or her or anything anymore. I just want to be yours." She felt ready to cry at that.
"Star?" it was overwhelming. She kept looking at him, knowing in that instant without a doubt that she loved him. But as soon as she was elated to discover what she felt for him she began to wonder, how would she be able to leave Roy? She didn't know. But she knew she had to. Because Robin was willing to give up everything just to be with her. Because it was always Robin. It would always be Robin. It always had been. She wanted to kiss him and claim him, but knew that first she had to confess to Roy that she did not love him.
"Pardon me," she said while pushing past him to go in search of Roy. Robin stood there, looking after her as she walked, wondering if he had said something wrong, and wondering if she would ever even want him to be hers. But he knew, as she pushed through the smiling faces and attracted the attention of Raven, that it didn't matter. Because he was already hers, whether she wanted it or not.
Cyborg felt alone. Utterly alone. He was happy for his friends of course. Robin and Star were dancing and looking quite cozy. And Rae and BB were dancing with each other, gazing into one another's eyes. And here he was. In the corner of the room, looking miserable and feeling worst than he looked. Bumblebee hadn't even paid attention to him all evening. She was laughing with the Flash, asking him to tell her stories about the Justin League and the missions he had been on. As if he was such a great hero. So he could run fast. Big deal. Cy could run fast. Ish. But none of that mattered. Because he did care about her. And she didn't even slightly care about him.
While he was wallowing in self pity, wondering if he should just switch himself off forever, he was suddenly interrupted.
"Hello there. Looks like you're having a lot of fun, Sparky." He couldn't believe she was talking to him. And as he looked up, ready to smile, he saw that she had brought the track star with her.
"maybe a little too much fun," speed racer added in there.
"Ha…ha." He said in response.
"Tough tin," Flash said in a mumble, gaining a glare from Cy.
"Uh, Flash, maybe I could catch you later."
"Sure thing B. Later lovely," he said, zipping away, making Cy want to throw up when he noticed he had done so in an actual Flash.
"douche bag."
"Hey now. Don't be angry with Flash for being a fun guy just because you messed things up with your girlfriend." He had nothing to say to that.
"I didn't realize you had kept the title."
"well…I thought about it and I don't really like the idea of someone else getting their hands on you."
"I thought you said that you wanted secrecy."
"I thought I did too. But if…that means losing you…then it's not worth it. I'm sorry." He looked at her again now.
"Forgive me?" he smiled and pulled her in for a hug.
"You had me at hello," he joked while quoting the first movie they saw together, Jerry McGuire.
"Hey, where's Star headed in such a hurry? She looks upset." And Cyborg could only watch where B had pointed.
Star had to find him. She had to now. Perhaps if she was just honest about her feelings he would understand? She didn't know. She did like him. But she loved Robin. Which only made her feel worst. She felt so guilty for having let things get this far with Roy. She felt like she was betraying his trust. How could she do this to him? She was disgusting.
"Starfire. Where are you going?" Raven had come up behind her and when she turned she saw Robin coming up to join them. She sped up slightly.
"I need to talk to Roy."
"Is everything alright?"
"No. but I need to…" She finally made it to the main door and as it opened she was surprised in the very least to see Roy making out with Summer. The two were wound around each other locked in an intense embrace.
"Roy!" he stopped kissing Summer then and did just as the two rehearsed and looked very surprised to see Star there.
"Oh! Hey there birthday girl!" Summer said while trying to look innocent and see if Robin was looking. She was somewhat disappointed to find Robin stuck behind Batman.
"…but, Roy…you-you said that you loved me." He rubbed the back of his head with his hand and began to speak.
"Star…I'm sorry. It's just not working out between you and me. I-I don't know how else to say it. But…I don't love you." She felt like she had been slapped in the face. How could he be so blunt? How could he suddenly no longer care and without an explanation? The room was silent. The music had stopped. Everyone was looking. Robin fuming. Starfire's birthday party was being ruined.
"You lied to me?"
"People do it everyday birthday girl. Welcome to earth." Starfire couldn't believe it! She had felt guilty, felt disgusted with herself. She had felt ashamed and as if she didn't deserve anyone's affections for preparing to break up with Roy and here he was, making out with Summer. He had lied to her. He didn't love her. He loved Summer. It seemed that Summer always got everything, just as she had claimed. She could feel the tears prickling at her eyes, but tried her best to be strong in front of everyone. She would not fall apart! But it was then that Roy grabbed Summer's hand and she could control herself no longer. She started to openly sob.
And the party doesn't stop with all the guests confused, and sorry while openly staring at Starfire and not knowing what to do; Cyborg and Bumblebee staring at the scene from a distance, shocked to see just how evil Summer truly is; Beastboy, angry and confused, standing next to a steaming Raven who was planning post-party to castrate Roy for being such a lying jerk and kill Summer for hurting Starfire again and ruining her party; Speedy not knowing if he should be happy that he wasn't with Star anymore or loathing himself for his treatment of her; Summer ready to explode with joy for finally humiliating Stardork like she wanted, smiling with satisfaction; and Robin torn between beating the freckles off of Speedy or Roy or whatever and running up to console Starfire. Poor Starfire, who was crying in front of all of her guests, feeling used and betrayed while Raven and Beastboy walked up to her.
"It's okay Star," Raven started, trying to calm her as she continued to cry.
"Star, maybe you should try to calm down?"
"Yes, Star, this isn't the place to do this." And to that, she spun around, tears streaming, eye make-up smudged, brows knitted together, and answered, "It's my party and I'll cry if I want to!"
Hello readers!
That was a rather long chapter, and I hope you enjoyed it. The next one is being written right now. Should be up in a week or so.
Thanks for the great reviews. This story is coming to a close and Summer will be gone! yay!
Lovin' It,
LILY.