A/N: 1) Last date with Leslie we will have to endure until that fateful moment in OTL. 2) Personally I'm not especially pleased with the way the first part of this chapter came out. I felt I needed to establish a reason the doorman would allow Leslie into Lee's apartment. Anyway, constructive criticism is welcome. And having the doorman drop-kick Leslie when he meets her wouldn't work in this story. ;) 3) Had a major 80s flashback while writing this chapter...obviously.

Chapter 4-You're the Inspiration

Lee looked at Leslie as they finished their meal. He hoped he could ask what he wanted without sounding forward.

"Um, Leslie," Lee said.

Leslie smiled at him in answer and Lee thought, not for the first time, that she had a very beautiful smile. It made him fell almost like he did when..No, he reminded himself. He was not to think that way. He had to forget his ridiculous fantasies about Amanda. Taking a breath, he plunged ahead.

"I was wondering if you'd like to go back to my place for dessert?" As soon as Lee realized what he'd said he spat out quickly, " I mean, so you can see where I live and...uh."

Leslie reached across the table and took Lee's hand in hers.

"It's OK, Lee," she told him. "I trust you."

Lee looked into Leslie's eyes and for a moment expected to see a certain look but he stamped that thought down. Leslie was not Amanda. He had ruined that relationship before it had even started. With Leslie he had a clean slate. With Leslie it would be good.

Lee parked his car in front of his apartment then quickly walked around and opened the door for Leslie. As he shut it, he leaned down and kissed her gently. Walking into the lobby he saw Frank, the night doorman.

"Frank," Lee greeted the man.

"Good evening, Mr Stetson," Frank replied.

"Frank, I'd like you to meet Leslie O'Conner," Lee introduced them. "Leslie, this is Frank Munroe, the night doorman."

After the two had greeted each other, Frank walked over to the lift to press the call button. As they waited Leslie made pleasant small talk with Frank as Lee looked on and smiled.

Once in his apartment, Lee put some light jazz on the turntable before serving Leslie the dessert he'd bought, along with a nice burgundy. They sat on the sofa and enjoyed dessert and each others company as they talked about work and Leslie's upcoming return to New York. Lee thought he would probably miss Leslie but he didn't already feel it the way he had about Amanda when he'd been given his West German assignment last summer. It would probably take time, he realized. He was only just getting to know Leslie.

When Leslie finished her dessert, she set the plate next to her wine glass on the coffee table, then she held her hand out to Lee as she rose.

"Care to dance?" she smiled.

Lee accepted and they moved to the open space between the sofa and the door to the kitchen. As they swayed with the slow music Lee held Leslie and rested his cheek on the top of her head as she rested hers on his chest. He was only mildly surprised at how pleasant it was to not be rushing Leslie to the bedroom. He knew that eventually that part would happen, but they would be much farther along in their relationship when they did.

They danced that way for a while before Leslie pulled herself away, apologizing that she had to get back to the hotel and sleep before she worked the next day.

"Sure," Lee said, giving her a light kiss. "Let me get my keys."

Leslie shook her head.

"No, Lee, I should just call a cab," she smiled.

For a moment Lee thought he might have done something wrong, then Leslie pointed to the clock and said, "It would be way after midnight by the time you got home if I let you take me back to the hotel."

Lee was surprised when he saw how late it was. He hadn't noticed that two hours had passed since they had arrived at his apartment. Sighing and nodding his head he watched Leslie walk over and place the call. They took their coats and Lee went with Leslie down to the lobby to wait with her for the cab.

As they walked through the lobby, Leslie turned to Frank and said, "Good night."

He returned the greeting as he opened the lobby door for them and they walked outside to wait on the curb.

At 1am, Lee thought that he probably should have just taken Leslie back to the hotel. He'd been alternately staring at the ceiling and the clock since before midnight. Finally he crawled out of bed and went to take up his new nightly residence on the sofa. Picking up the remote, he turned on the TV and began to channel surf. He had to admit that cable certainly gave insomniacs something to do. In only the short time since it had become popular enough for the building manager to have it installed there had been a rapid increase in the number of channels. Only a few years ago there would have been nothing on this late except color lines and a long, monotonous beep. Now he had at least 50 channels to flip through. Flip being the key word. There was nothing on. He wondered briefly how much he was being charged for 50 channels of nothing interesting to watch.

He finally settled on the music video channel. If for no other reason than to occupy his mind trying to figure out how the video correlated with the song, if at all. There was a video playing by a group that called itself a-ha. The video was of a young woman reading a rather large comic book. He wasn't sure what it had to do with the lyrics of the song. Not that he entirely understood what the lyrics were in the first place. Next was a video by someone he actually understood, Billy Squier. But in pink? And the whole shirt ripping thing? Was the guy trying to commit professional suicide? Following that was a video of some guys all painted up and screaming into the camera in what Lee could only presume was supposed to be reminiscent of KISS. They were failing miserably.

Finally a softer song by Chicago came on. He wasn't entirely thrilled with the new sound Chicago had adopted but he supposed "change or die" applied to the music industry as well as any other. Hoping it might help him relax, he turned the volume down a little, leaned his head back on the sofa, and closed his eyes. He felt himself begin to relax as he listened to Peter Cetera croon.

You know our love was meant to be
The kind of love to last forever
And I want you here with me
From tonight until the end of time

You should know
Everywhere I go
You're always on my mind
In my heart, in my soul

Lee drifted off to sleep somewhere in the middle of the chorus.

Baby,
You're the meaning in my life
You're the inspiration
You bring meaning to my life
You're the inspiration
I wanna have you near me
I wanna have you hear me sayin'
No one needs you more than I need you

He saw Amanda's face hovering over his.

And I know, yes, I know that it's plain to see
We're so in love when we're together

"Care to dance?" she asked. And then they were.

Now I know that I need you here with me
From tonight until the end of time

As the chorus rang in his head, Lee took in Amanda appreciatively with his eyes. She was beautiful. Her black dress fitted to her body in all the right ways. He leaned his face toward hers. He wanted to feel her lips pressed to his.

But she pushed him gently away. He looked at her, his confusion evident.

She shook her head sadly.

"Lee," she said. "Don't you think I've suffered enough?"

"But I," he started to argue, but she just shook her head and slowly backed away from him as she continued to speak.

"No, Lee. I have two young, impressionable boys to think of. What kind of roll model could you be? They deserve better after everything they've been through. You of all people should understand that."

She turned and opened the door.

Looking back to him before she closed it behind her she said, "I deserve better, you know I do."

He tried to yell to her to stop her from leaving. No words would come from his throat. He struggled to get to the door, to stop her before she reached the elevator. He couldn't move. He wanted to scream in frustration. Finally he was able to kick one foot up, and a pain shot through his leg.

"Ow," he hollered, as he came awake. He looked down at his feet and realized he'd kicked the coffee table in his sleep. There was a slight gash in his shin.

Sighing, he leaned forward and put his head in his hands. When would these dreams end? He was doing everything he could to move forward, but his dreams always came back to Amanda, and his very selfish desire to be more than friends.

In the background he heard John Waite singing, "I ain't missing you at all."

Lee picked up the remote and shut off the TV.

"Damned music videos," he grumbled to the empty room.