Hey everyone! I know i haven't updated in a while. I think like more than a month right? Sorry about that. Well school started and I've had tons of hw. I've been busy with show choir rehearsals and then i lost my phone and then my sister broke her arm and it's gonna be my birthday next tuesday!

I want to thank all of your support and the reviewers just make me so happy. Keep it up guys, i love you all!

Ok i want to clear up that Adam and Drew are NOT related in this story. That's why I changed Adam's last name.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately I do not own Degrassi or the song Desperate by Fireflight. Or maybe i do but I don't want anyone to find out. Hmmmmmm.

ChapterNine

I know there's so much at steak

But I don't know if I can take

One more pat on the back saying "I'll be ok"

Can't you see my whole life is in disarray?

Clare's P.O.V.

Phew. That was a close one. What am I going to do? On one hand, I really like Eli and those kisses we shared were amazing. I can't get the idea of his perfectly crooked lips on mine out of my head. It's like our lips were made for each other because they fit together like a puzzle piece. But on the other hand, it's against the rules.

"Ugh why must this happen to me?!" I yelled out of frustration. I walked, more like stomped, angrily to my quarters. The sun was setting and supper would be ready soon. I did not want to wear this extremely tight dress for a few more hours so I decided to put on my night gown. I don't care if my mother thinks that it's inappropriate to wear sleepwear to dinner. I had an eventful day and I just want to be comfortable.

I sat in my chambers brushing my hair when I heard a knock on my door and a voice followed after.

"Clare, may I come in, dear?" I recognized the voice as no other than Nurse Marie's.

"You may." I responded. The tall door that reached the ceiling creaked open and in came the nurse with a distraught expression. I ran up to her, my lavender sleep gown flowing behind me. I gave her a concerned look and waited for her to speak.

"The suitors that Queen Helen arranged for you have….arrived early." I cannot believe what I heard.

They're….early?

I went and sat on my bed, a shocked demeanor invading my face. It's too soon to deal with this. My birthday isn't for another three days. I was expecting them a couple of days after my birthday. I cannot get married, especially with a complete stranger. What about Eli? My heart sunk to my feet. I will not get married to someone else when Eli is the one I love. Love? Do I really love him? I don't know but I know that I like him a lot.

"No no no no…." is all I manage to squeak out. I look up to Nurse Marie, the tears in my eyes threatening to escape.

"You must tell your mother that you don't want to go through with this. I'm sure she'll understand." She said with plead in her voice and eyes. I shook my head. My mother won't understand. I already told her how I felt about this whole situation, but it seems like she could care less because she decided to continue her plan anyway. She already has my whole life planned out for me. I simply sigh and stand up to get dressed.

"I'll just go downstairs. I'll think of something. I walk off to my dresser to get ready to meet the suitors.

After my corset was on, Nurse Marie helped me put on my dress. It was a sort of dark orange color, like the color of a sunset. Around the neckline, there was a golden scarf-like piece of fabric and that same fabric was sewn at the end of the sleeves, which flowed freely. There is also an elaborate design with a golden lace criss-crossing down the chest and stomach area.

After I was presentable, I went downstairs to meet the suitors. I will decline every single one of them. Unless one of them is Eli, which I doubt, I will not marry any one of those men. Before Nurse Marie and I enter the room, she turns me to face her. She fixes my tiara and smoothes out the nonexistent wrinkles in my dress. She looks more nervous than I do. Nurse Marie offers me a slight sorrowful smile and I return it.

I take a deep breath and I walk into the ballroom with confidence and pride. I will not let a single person in this room ruin my future.

"Clare, honey! I'm glad you showed up." My mother said with a huge grin plastered on her face. That's actually the first she's said anything to me in the past week. I'm surprised she still remembered my name. I scoff inwardly.

"Clare this is K.C. Guthrie, Adam Tompson, Wesley Betenkamp, Mike Dallas, Declan Coyne, and Connor Deslauriers." The queen introduced me to all of the suitors pointing to each one as she said their name. I curtseyed to all of them as they bowed.

Here we go again with the bowing.

"It's nice to meet you all." I said with an obviously fake smile.

"Ok so each one of you will spend some time with the princess so she gets to know you all better to make the best decision possible." She smiled brightly.

Don't waste your time. I won't be choosing any of you.

Up first was a weird chap with pale skin, curly black hair, and glasses.

"Princess Clare. What an honor." He bowed and I sighed. "My name is Wesley Betenkamp. I am from the humble land of Kohamas." Wesley seemed very nervous around me and for some odd reason, he kept glancing at my chest area.

"Uhh…nice speaking to you Wesley. I'll make sure to notify you of my decision." I tell him politely. If I wasn't raised the way that I was, I would have probably told him to get the hell out and to stop being such a pervert.

Then, I spoke to Connor. He seemed nice and all but it was almost the same situation I experienced with Wesley.

Next was Declan Coyne's turn. I found him kind of attractive. He actually had a lot of good qualities. He's going to make a great king some day. He was smart, kind, polite, and very educated. But he was also very sophisticated and somewhat arrogant. I couldn't help but compare him to Eli. Declan had blue eyes similar to mine, but Eli's eyes were a dark emerald color that I could stare at forever. Declan was classy and serious, and Eli was quite the opposite, which is what I love about him. And finally, Declan was taller than me by a few inches, while Eli is about the same size as me. It's like he was made for me.

A young man then approached me and something about him seemed peculiar.

"Hi Princess. Um I'm Adam Tompson. I'm actually not here to ask for your hand in marriage. I come with a mission." I simply raised my eyebrows. So far, I like him better than the other guys that spoke to me.

"It's about Eli." He whispered softly so only I would hear. My eyes widened at the mention of Eli's name and I motioned for him to continue.

"I know how much he likes you. He talks about you all the time. He's my best friend and I don't want to see him hurt. So if you are just using him please don't. He has had a hard past involving his love life. I don't want him to break down for a girl again." Adam said with concern etched on his face. I began to shake my head violently.

"I would never do something like that to anyone, especially Eli. I lov… I mean like him a lot, too." I said, a slight blush appearing on my cheeks as I realize what I was about to admit out loud. Adam smiles from ear to ear. I guess he heard what I was about to confess.

"Just promise me that you won't break his heart." The boy pleaded. I nodded my head without hesitation. He gives me a soft smile. "So what are you going to do? I mean if you plan on being with Eli then what are you going to do about the situation with the suitors?" Adam asked worriedly. I frowned.

"I don't know yet. But what I do know is that I will not marry anyone of those people inside the ball room. I swear." He simply smiles and before he can respond, Johnny, my guard, appears from around the corner and announces that our time is up.

Adam turns back and says a soft 'goodbye' before turning to leave.

"Oh! And Adam?!" I yell back at him before he disappears forever. He turns to me.

"Feel free to stop by anytime to just hang out." I say with a smile. I do get lonely around the castle. I need a friend. Adam grins genuinely and nods before he turns on his heel once again.

I then spoke to Mike Dallas and I am not exaggerating when I say that it was the worst conversation I've ever had if it's even considered a conversation. I felt like a third wheel. Mike is so full of himself. All he could talk about was how rich he was and how incredibly handsome every girl in his kingdom thought he was. He didn't let me get a single word in, so when time was up, I felt so relieved.

Finally, I was down to the last suitor of the day. K.C. Guthrie. The first thing I noticed was how tall he was. He was even taller than Declan. He had long, light brown disheveled hair covering his forehead and part of his hazel eyes. He approached me with a smile apparent on his features. I curtsied politely like I did with the other suitors but he pulled me up halfway. K.C. held my hands in his and he got on his knees. I was beginning to get nervous and curious as to what he was going to do next. He took my right hand and kissed it gently.

No! What is he doing?! Only Eli is allowed to do that!

"Princess Clare, you are the most beautiful creature I have ever laid eyes on."

Creature? Oh! So I am an animal now?

Nevertheless, the gesture was sweet. What am I saying? If I show any emotion, K.C. will take advantage of that and somehow squirm his way in. I got to keep my walls up.

"I had my fair share of days traveling with those idiots. They are weird, dorky, arrogant, girly jerks that don't know how to treat a princess the way she should be treated. But I promise you that I am none of those things. I will make sure that you are taken care of the way you deserve. You are in good hands." He didn't say selfish. That's what he's being right now. Eli swept me off my feet with a poem about me, not about how good of a person he is.

But I guess, out of all of the suitors, not counting Adam, K.C. is the most decent.

"Thank you K.C. I will let you and everyone else know my decision by noon tomorrow. Good night." I say simply, trying my best to show no emotion. I walked off to my room. I have a lot of thinking to do.

After entering my bedroom and putting on my lavender night gown once again, I began to pace my room recklessly. What am I going to do?! Everyone expects to have an answer by tomorrow! I am expected to choose one of the suitors from downstairs, but I don't want to. I want to be with Eli not any of those selfish and arrogant princes.

As I was deep in thought I heard a rustling noise outside. But I dismissed it simply because I am just so stressed out that I just might be going insane. But then I heard it again this time a little louder. I walked out into my balcony and heard a low voice curse under their breath. Soon enough I saw, a tall, dark figure climb up my balcony. I gasped. Oh my gosh. What do I do? There's some strange man climbing up the balcony!

When the figure became visible in the light of the moon, I let out the breath I didn't notice I was holding in.

"Eli." I exhaled.

"That's me!" He answered

"Shhhh! Not so loud. They might hear you!" I whispered

"Who's gonna hear me?" He asked perplexed. I grabbed Eli by the arm and took him inside of my room. He smirked once we were face to face and immediately I knew his thoughts. They were normal for a teenage hormonal boy.

Eli must have noticed the distraught in my eyes because the mischief in his eyes was replaced with concern.

"Hey Blue Eyes what's the matter?" He asked, lifting my chin with his index finger so that I would look up to meet his emerald orbs.

Tears began to form in my eyes when I realized that I might never get to be with Eli ever again.

"Eli I….can't." I whispered softly.

"You can't what Clare?" Eli seemed to get more worried by the second.

"I can't. I just can't!" I said louder, my voice cracking as a tear slipped down my cheek. The green-eyed boy rubbed his thumb against my cheek, wiping away the tear rolling down.

As I was going to open my mouth to say something, I felt my throat closing. The walls around me were closing in and I was trapped. Eli sees everything that's going on but he can't save me.

"I can't breathe." I say in a monotone voice. I make out the panic in his eyes before he leads me out to the balcony. He looks at me expectantly.

"No, Eli. I can physically breathe, but I am being suffocated by everyone! My mother, the suitors, the entire kingdom! I need to get out of here. Out of this shameful place. I have been stuck in this castle for the last eleven years of my life! Not once leaving these brick walls. I need an escape. Take me to village with you." I said desperately

I need to get away.

Oooooo intense right? Well I'll try to update soon before my birthday so sometime before august 27th you will be reading the next chapter and it's gonna be very interesting. I can't wait for all of you to read it. I already know what it's gonna be about :D Anyway please review. Goodbye my lovies (: