Author's Note: I've had a cold since last Friday, so in between sneezing, coughing, drinking water, taking pills, having my temperature taken, having my voice nearly give out on me, and my parents' insistence that I take it easy and rest, I haven't had as much time for this fic as I would have liked. But luckily, I'm doing a lot better today and I've finally cranked out the next chapter!
Chapter 22: To the Church
Shira hardly paid attention to the miso soup she was making, her mind plagued with the last exchange she had with Saber. Whatever relationship beyond Master and Servant she had wanted to believe was forming between them was certainly damaged beyond repair now. And it was all because she couldn't keep her hormones to herself.
Why did I go and kiss him in the first place? she thought as she tended to the soup. When Rin kissed Saber that night in the ruins, he must have been thrown into a flashback, reliving his rape—Shira of all people should have known better. After all, hadn't she spent their entire date being careful to avoid overly physical affection?
On the other hand, though, Saber had kissed her back, but how he'd reacted afterward wasn't exactly cause for rejoicing. Or rather, how he hadn't reacted. As he looked at her after the kiss, Shira had been reminded of the expression he'd worn during their first meeting: calm, cool, and all business. When Saber was summoned, she may have been utterly enchanted by him, but he'd only seen her as his Master.
And clearly, that was all she would be to him. What a fool she was to hope for anything more.
Dinner between Shira and Saber was very quiet. Neither of them made any attempt at conversation, or even made eye contact. They were sitting across from each other at the dining room table, but they might as well have been on opposite sides of the world. After dinner was eaten and the dishes were washed, the two went to their rooms without so much as a goodnight.
Early the next morning, Shira got dressed, groomed herself, and was out of the estate and on her way to Kotomine Church in less than thirty minutes. After two nights ago, there was no way Gilgamesh would not come after her and Saber again, and she didn't want to think about what would happen if they couldn't come up with a plan to defeat him. Hopefully, Kotomine would be able to help.
The sky was cloudy and downcast by the time Shira made it to the church, giving the building a gloomy, even foreboding look. Shivering slightly from the cold, she headed to the doors and opened them.
"Kotomine?" she called out, her voice echoing through the chapel. No one answered. Was the priest somewhere in the back? Shira walked to the back door he had used the last time she was here and went outside to the courtyard.
She looked around and took a few paces, trying to remember the route to Kotomine's sitting room, when she suddenly stopped dead in her tracks.
The courtyard looked just as beautiful as before, the surroundings just as peaceful. And yet, the hairs on the back of Shira's neck stood on end as though someone was about to jump at her at any second, and her stomach churned painfully with nausea.
Something...something was wrong here.
Go.
Her heart clenched tightly in her chest.
Go away.
Her face became clammy.
Just turn around and go away!
A burning sensation rose in her throat.
Go home.
She stumbled forward, pressing a hand to her aching temple.
There's no reason for you to be here!
She spied a small, dark indent in the corner of the church's walls.
Don't stop.
She walked to the indent, finding a staircase leading down.
Turn around NOW!
She headed down the stairs. Once she made it to flat ground, she felt stone beneath her feet. When her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she saw that the entire room was made of gray stone. Shira decided it must be an underground chapel, and a frequently used one at that, since there was no dust or mold covering the floor or walls. To her left was an entrance to another chamber, one that contained a horrible stench. She didn't bother to try to figure out what the smell could be as she peered inside.
She wished she had never looked.
Littered around the chamber were corpses—deformed, decomposing corpses. Every single one was gray-skinned, hairless, and wore no clothing. The bodies were so twisted that they couldn't remotely be called human. Various limbs had been hacked off and carelessly strewed about, leaving bloodstains on the floor. In the center of the chamber, coffins had been placed, coffins that were—draining mana?!
Shira's mouth opened in a silent scream. These corpses...they were still alive. They could not move, they could not speak, but somehow, they were still alive, helpless to prevent the coffins from leeching off of their very souls. And what was more was that...
They were all the size of children.
The redhead backed away, hoping to find a good place to vomit, when someone grabbed her arm from behind.
"Nice to see you again so soon, Shira Emiya," a deep baritone said cordially, the pleasant tone at odds with how tight the grip on her arm was.
Kotomine! "You! You did this?!" Shira cried out, whirling around to face the priest.
"This might be a church, Emiya," Kotomine informed her silkily, "but that doesn't mean you can go poking around in its dark corners."
She yanked her arm out of his grasp, taking a step backward. But before she could do anything else, a man dressed in blue—Lancer—appeared right in front of her, stabbing her in the chest with Gae Bolg.
Shira's body seized up, her breath coming out in pained gasps. Her vision blurred as she felt Lancer pull his spear from where he'd stabbed her, and she fell to the ground, blood quickly pooling around her.
When Saber woke up, Shira was nowhere to be found. He thought that perhaps she was making breakfast, but when he went into the kitchen, he saw that it was just as empty as her bedroom.
Most likely, she does not want to see me, the blond thought as he sat cross-legged on the porch, staring sightlessly at the cloudy sky. Of course she didn't; he had played his part to perfection last night. After his cold dismissal of their kiss, he had ignored her from the moment dinner was served to when they retired to their beds. Shira's avoidance of him should have been a relief, a sign that his plan was working, and yet...
The memory of Shira pressing her lips to Saber's replayed in his mind, and his face flushed with heat as he remembered wanting to deepen the kiss, wanting to taste more of her—but he quickly shook his head, ashamed for having such thoughts. He had pushed her away no more than twelve hours ago, and he still longed for her? How selfish could he be?
He told himself for what must have been the millionth time that getting Shira to hate him was the only way to spare her the pain of their inevitable separation. He was a Servant who vowed to protect his Master—no, more than that, he was a knight who wanted to protect his ladylove—and he would stay true to that promise no matter what the cost.
Even if it meant protecting her from himself.
"Saber, have you seen Shira?" Rin's voice ripped him from his brooding.
"Rin," Saber greeted as the black-haired girl walked up to him.
"I can't seem to find her anywhere," Rin continued. "I wanted to ask for her help since Ilya's fever is getting worse."
"Ilyasviel has not yet recovered?" Saber asked, getting up to follow Rin back into the estate.
"No; in fact, I think she's reaching her limit," Rin said somberly as they walked through the hall to the dining room. "As the Grail War goes on, Ilya's health will continue to weaken."
Saber frowned as he and Rin settled themselves around the dining room table. "What do you mean by limit?"
"Ilya's almost at maximum capacity. Once she reaches that point, she'll have to discard the functions she needs the least, like being human. She was designed in such a way that she'll continue to break down the longer the Grail War progresses."
The knight's lips parted slightly in shock, and Rin had the grace to look a little sheepish.
"No, it's okay," she hastened to add. "I'm actually making it sound far worse than it is." Rin then became serious again. "But there is something else we should discuss: Lancer's Master."
"You have determined who it is?" Saber questioned.
"I have," Rin confirmed. "I went to her hideout, but all I found were bloodstains and a left arm with the Command Seals ripped out of it. Obviously, someone killed Lancer's Master a long time ago."
"Does this mean that Lancer is dead as well?" Saber wondered out loud. "Perhaps another Servant killed him after he attacked Shira."
But Rin was shaking her head. "Can't be; the blood I found was older than that. My guess is that Lancer's Master was killed long before we met him, and if he's still around—"
"Whoever killed his Master must have stolen the Command Seals and formed a new contract with him," Saber finished. "But how can that be? The only ones who can transfer Command Seals are Masters and Servants. No matter how talented a magus is, he or she cannot become a Master by stealing Command Seals."
"Then let me ask you this," Rin said. "If the Holy Grail disappears, could someone remain a Master indefinitely as long as they still had both their Command Seals and their Servant?"
"I...suppose so," Saber admitted. "In that case, the magus who killed Lancer's original Master and formed a contract with him must be a Master from the last Grail War."
Rin nodded in agreement. "It's the only thing that makes sense, and it would explain a lot about Lancer's behavior. He casually attacked other Servants without even trying to conceal his true identity—no one does that. Lancer's only role was to collect information on enemies, which means his current Master must have a more combat type Servant at his disposal."
A moment of contemplative silence passed. This "more combat type Servant" could only be Gilgamesh. Saber felt a chill course through him as he remembered he hadn't seen Shira at all since last night. For all he knew, this Master had taken her captive—Shira might be in danger at this very second.
Saber struggled to keep his voice neutral as he spoke. "Rin, do you have any idea where Shira could be?"
"No; that's why I was asking you earlier. Wait a minute," Rin snapped her fingers in realization, "she probably went to see Kirei again."
Saber's eyes narrowed. "Kotomine Church." And with that, he quickly stood up and hurried out of the estate, ignoring a startled Rin asking him where he was going. His armor materialized in a burst of light, and he continued running in the direction of the church.
From the moment he had arrived at Kotomine Church the night Shira summoned him, he knew that place was far from holy ground. It was quite similar to Ryudou Temple—the air was stifling and full of death. The thought passed through Saber's mind before he could stop it: Shira, what were you thinking, going there alone?
It wasn't long before the church was in sight, and Saber felt a wave of nausea assault his senses. The nausea, however, was not coming from him—it was coming from Shira. Whatever was happening inside that building, it was clear that his Master was on the verge of death.
Shira is dying. Those three words hit Saber like a blow to the face. Shira is dying! And if he didn't get there in time, she would die remembering him as the one who had so callously rejected her, never knowing that he—
With a fresh burst of speed, Saber crashed through the church's doors. He raced through the chapel, through the courtyard, and down the stairs that led underground without giving his surroundings a second glance. He stopped once he made it inside a stone chamber, looking around. If the smell of death was potent before, it was almost completely overwhelming now.
Saber saw the entrance to another chamber almost at once, but he noticed neither the undead corpses nor the coffins. All his eyes took in was the sight of Shira lying face first on the ground in a pool of her own blood.
"Shira!" he exclaimed, moving to run towards her.
But before he could reach her, Lancer appeared in front of him, blocking his way.
"Greetings," Lancer said with a slight smirk.
Saber bit back a snarl as he raised Excalibur, swinging it at the spearman with a battle cry. Lancer used Gae Bolg to protect his face, blocking Saber's attack. The sword and spear clashed for a few seconds, but both Servants were soon knocked back from each other. Saber took advantage of the momentary pause to look over at Shira's much too still form, wondering how quickly he could get her out of here.
Lancer took note of what he was looking at and laughed harshly. "You know, that's the second time I've impaled that girl in the chest. This time, I made sure she won't be coming back."
The knight snapped his gaze back to his opponent, glaring. "You used Gae Bolg on Shira?!" he demanded.
"I missed her heart," Lancer concurred, twirling his spear in a circle, "but she's tasting the curse all the same." He now pointed Gae Bolg at Saber. "No wound inflicted by this spear will ever be healed."
Saber's only reply was to charge forward, swinging Excalibur. Lancer evaded the blow, then thrust Gae Bolg in Saber's direction. The blond parried the attack and leapt backward out of the spearman's range, and the two combatants proceeded to rush towards each other, the sound of their weapons clanging filling the air.
Meanwhile, Shira took no notice of the fight taking place only a few feet in front of her, did not even register the pain coming from her wound. All she could do was lie there, motionless and eyes devoid of their usual shine, as she lost herself in the most vivid flashback of the fire she had ever experienced. It seemed that all of her senses were in overdrive: she could feel the oppressive, scorching heat of the flames, taste the dark smoke that threatened to suffocate her, hear the screams of men, women...and children.
Shira now knew who those living corpses had to be—the other children who had been orphaned because of that fire. She hadn't been the only child taken to the hospital, but she had been the only one who had been adopted right away; the rest had been taken to Kotomine Church...and were now used by the priest himself as a supply of mana, never being allowed the mercy of death.
The petrified, pleading screams of children grew louder and louder in Shira's ears. All they wanted was to be saved, for their agony to end, but...
I can't do it, she thought, miserable and racked with guilt. I can't save you. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I can't do anything...
Somewhere in her PTSD-addled mind, she heard the sound of footsteps approaching. Was it Saber? No—whoever it was had grabbed her by the roots of her hair and was now dragging her along the ground like a wagon. It couldn't be Saber; surely he would have more respect for his Master than that, right?
"That's enough, Saber."
The knight in question abruptly stopped mid-charge, lowering his sword in surprise as Kotomine emerged from the second chamber. Saber saw that Kotomine was pulling Shira by the hair. Release her! Now! he was bursting to yell, but the priest chose that moment to continue.
"I suggest you sheathe that sword of yours." Kotomine carelessly threw Shira to the ground, and the redhead let out a small, pained yelp. "If all you want is to retrieve the girl, I will gladly turn her over to you. After all," he smirked, "my only duty in this War is to determine who truly has the right to possess the Holy Grail."
You expect me to believe that when I now know you are the one who killed Lancer's Master and will certainly do the same to mine? Saber thought furiously.
"In fact," Kotomine went on, "if that is what you desire, I can grant you the right to possess the Grail now."
Lancer turned to face the priest, his eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Oh, really? Because I thought it wouldn't appear until there's only one Master and Servant left."
"The vessel for the Holy Grail is a separate thing entirely," Kotomine said smoothly. "It's a tangible object that must be prepared. As the end of the War nears, power will flow into the vessel until the Grail fully materializes. Given that there are only two Servants left, I would imagine that the process is nearly complete. What the Holy Grail is waiting for now is to be filled with the blood of a human sacrifice, and if a worthy person presents themselves, I will gladly give the Grail to them.
"With that said, Shira Emiya," Kotomine stepped over to the prone girl, kneeling beside her, grabbing her by her hair again, and ignoring the grunts that escaped her mouth as she was forced to her knees, "why don't we start this little exchange off by hearing what you have to say regarding the events from ten years ago? Do you honestly feel no hatred for the people responsible for that?"
Saber watched as Shira's eyes, so terribly lifeless and empty, stared out into space. "Ten years ago..." she said faintly. "I couldn't save anyone...I heard their screams, but there was nothing I could do...Everyone wanted to be saved, but I was the only one who lived..."
"The Holy Grail can undo that night, Emiya," Kotomine told her in a voice that could almost be called compassionate. "All of those deaths—all of your guilt—can go away with only a single wish. Just tell me you want the Grail, and it will be yours."
The seconds crawled by in silence as Saber waited for Shira's answer with bated breath.
"No. I don't want anything to do with it."
Her voice was still small, but steady, and the knight let out a sharp exhale, not even having to pretend he was hanging off of her every word.
"The past should remain in the past. If I made it so that the fire didn't happen, what respect would that show to all the families who've spent years overcoming that tragedy? It would all be for nothing if it never happened. Dealing with the pain and moving forward to the future...isn't that the only way to honor the people you've lost? I've been reliving that fire for ten years, and as horrible as it was, it's still shaped both my life and everyone else who went through it."
Shira paused. "No matter how much it hurts, I still think this is the right path to choose."
Kotomine frowned as he set her back down. "I see; so that means—"
"I have no use for the Holy Grail," Shira interrupted. "I have to stay true to who I am, for myself and for all the people that I abandoned."
The priest remained silent as he pulled Shira to her feet and pushed her in Saber's direction. She staggered forward, her legs struggling to hold her weight, and collapsed into her Servant's arms.
"And what about you, Saber?" Kotomine asked, fixing his dark eyes on the blond. "I find it difficult to believe that your answer will be quite as arrogant as Emiya's."
Saber did not reply right away, opting to stare in wonder at the girl he held. He had thought she would agree to the offer to obtain the Holy Grail—that she should agree. When he informed her that they were a lot alike, he hadn't been exaggerating. Both were self-sacrificing, had little regard for their own welfare, harbored immense guilt for something that had happened in their pasts, and yet...
"Dealing with the pain and moving forward to the future...isn't that the only way to honor the people you've lost?"
His heart skipped a beat. Shira rejected the Grail as completely as her father did before her, whereas he sought to redo things. Perhaps they weren't as similar as he supposed; clearly, his Master had the inner strength to keep going even after watching her world burn before her eyes. And if she had the strength to do that, could she be strong enough to not break apart after his disappearance?
But that meant his grand plan to protect her from further heartache was—!
"Saber," Kotomine's voice tore him from his thoughts, "kill your Master. Do that, and your wish will come true."
Saber's head shot up to look at the priest. What...? he thought, stunned. Was it that simple? If Kotomine was to be believed, the Holy Grail was now within his grasp. If he obtained it right now, his wish would be fulfilled. A new king would be selected in his place. This king would not allow himself to lose his agency for even a second. Britain would become a peaceful kingdom.
And all it would take was one blow from Excalibur.
But still Saber hesitated.
"Are you that desperate for the Holy Grail?"
He had been seeking a way to change the past for so long. Even before Morgan raped him, he never thought he was worthy to take the throne. Nonetheless, he had shouldered the responsibility of ruling his country. He had sacrificed a great deal to fight for his people, and he didn't regret it. On the other hand, though, if he were truly proud of his accomplishments, why did he want to change things?
"I swear, you have the biggest guilt complex ever."
Yes; yes, he did. He blamed himself for the rape, he blamed himself for Guinevere's infidelity, and he blamed himself for Britain's civil war. As King, any disaster that occurred would be on his head, it didn't matter that he never chose those events to happen, it didn't matter that he never asked for it—
He never asked for it.
He never asked for it.
The realization hit him suddenly, like a blind man seeing the sun for the very first time. He didn't encourage Morgan to follow him to his chambers. He didn't tell Guinevere to have an affair with Lancelot. He certainly didn't order his knights to betray him. Hadn't they all made their own decisions, their own choices? And if that was true, that meant...
There was no reason for his wish.
Saber's expression hardened. "What a fool you are, Kotomine. You dare to presume that I would kill Shira just to lay my hands on the Grail?"
He felt more than heard the slight gasp from the redhead.
"What Shira can offer me," he continued, "is far more desirable than what the Grail can. I want no part of it if the Holy Grail is going to pollute me; I already have everything I ever wanted."
It was true. He had his oath as the King, his pride as a knight...he even had the dream he had once, the night before he drew Caliburn from its stone: a long forgotten vision of a beautiful green meadow bathed in warm sunlight and a joyously smiling girl with long, straight red hair and bright brown eyes standing before him.
"Saber..." Shira mumbled.
"Shira, take my hand." Saber placed his hand on Shira's, and his body began to glow with mana. The mana spread to Shira, and she felt the pain recede from her wound.
In seconds, Shira was strong enough to stand on her own, even though her injury was still not completely healed. She straightened up and took a step away from Saber, looking at him questioningly as life returned to her eyes.
"Nothing can affect you as you are now," he said, "not even Gae Bolg's curse."
Kotomine regarded the pair coolly. "You two are so incredibly tedious." He paused momentarily. "It seems I will have to keep the Holy Grail after all, which means both of you must die."
With a smirk, Kotomine snapped his fingers; as if on cue, footsteps were heard descending the stairs. Shira and Saber turned to see Gilgamesh entering the underground chapel.
"Allow me to introduce you," Kotomine went on. "This was the Epic Spirit who was my partner in the previous Grail War, but I believe you three may have already met before."
Shira exchanged glances with Saber; the latter seemed unsurprised, while the former was quite the opposite. Kotomine being a Master instead of the impartial supervisor he was supposed to be was one thing, but being the Master of Lancer and Gilgamesh? How was that possible?
Gilgamesh did not bother with going down all the way, but instead jumped off the staircase to land in the middle of the chamber. Saber immediately put a protective arm in front of Shira, but Gilgamesh did not so much as turn in their direction, addressing Kotomine instead.
"So, this is where we're going to finish things?" The arrogant king shot a disdainful look at Lancer, who had been glaring at him the minute he stepped in. "And with this pesky little nuisance underfoot as well?"
"Who is this guy?" Lancer demanded, snapping his furious gaze to Kotomine. "Have you been working with two Servants this whole time?!"
"I never told you?" the priest asked, sounding completely unconcerned. "When the last Holy Grail War ended, he and I entered into a partnership where I would give him the sustenance he required in order to remain here."
"Sustenance," Lancer repeated, spitting out the word as if it were a curse. "So that explains this disgusting place. And why am I only hearing about this now?"
Kotomine raised an eyebrow. "If I had told you this earlier, would you have honestly fought alongside him as an equal?"
Lancer scoffed. "I'd die before I cooperated with him."
Shira chose that moment to speak up as she and Saber slowly moved towards the stairs. "So when I told you about there being an eighth Servant, Kotomine, you were just lying when you said you didn't know who it was."
"He disobeyed my instructions to simply watch and observe and revealed himself to you," Kotomine said. "If you investigated him, the trail would have eventually led to me, so I had no choice but to come up with a new plan." He chuckled. "But Emiya, nothing I said was really an outright lie."
No, you just twisted the truth to suit your own purposes, Shira thought angrily. I knew there was something I didn't like about you.
Kotomine turned his gaze to Saber. "This is like a repeat of ten years ago, isn't it, Saber?"
The knight tensed, his eyes narrowing.
"But back then," Kotomine continued, "I was defeated by Kiritsugu, so I was unable to witness the final scene. Backed into a corner, I touched the Holy Grail just as it was beginning to appear. Not even I could have foreseen the consequences of that action."
Shira felt her stomach drop. "That's why—you're the one who caused—!"
"That fire was the result of your attempt to take the Grail?" Saber cut in icily.
"That was not my original intention," Kotomine said calmly. "I had simply wished for everyone in that particular area to disappear." He started to walk forward. "The Grail would have done the same thing whether I had touched it or not."
"That's ridiculous," Saber protested. "The Holy Grail is merely a tool designed to grant its owner their wish."
"Really?" Kotomine's mouth set into a grim line. "And how do you think it goes about granting wishes? What the Holy Grail really is is an incredibly powerful weapon matched by no other, and the wishes it grants are delivered with destruction."
By now, Shira and Saber were forced to step aside as Kotomine reached the stairs.
"Are you saying," Saber's voice shook with outrage, "that the Holy Grail I have been searching for—!"
"Is nothing but a cursed chalice," Kotomine finished, "that destroys everything but its owner." He stood at the top of the stairs, never looking back. "It's time for the trash to be disposed of. Lancer, take Saber. Gilgamesh, take Emiya."
And with that, the priest walked out of the underground chapel, leaving Shira and Saber alone with their two enemies.
Shira's gaze darted between Lancer and Gilgamesh; the spearman was readying Gae Bolg while the king had already activated the Gate of Babylon. Saber ought to be able to hold off Lancer, but could he hold off both Lancer and Gilgamesh at the same time if they decided to team up to kill him? And she'd be screwed (In more ways than one, she thought as a cold shiver went up her spine) if she tried to go up against Gilgamesh. No, the only option she and Saber had was to retreat.
Before Shira could voice any of this to Saber, he grasped her hand firmly in his own.
"Whatever happens, do not leave my side."
"Saber, we have to—"
Shira abruptly stopped speaking as a long, thin sword appeared in front of Gilgamesh and he threw it in her direction. Saber made to deflect the weapon—
But in that instant, Lancer had rushed in and blocked the projectile himself. Saber and Shira stared at him in shock; Gilgamesh, however, did not look at all surprised, only annoyed.
"What are you doing?" he snapped. "Your target is Saber. You do remember that the girl's mine, right?"
"There's been a change of plans," Lancer retorted. "I refuse to be a part of this."
"Lancer, what are you—?" Saber started to ask.
"Don't get the wrong idea," the spearman interrupted. "I have no intention of fighting for you guys. Believe it or not, the only thing I'm doing is," his voice rose as he lunged at Gilgamesh, Gae Bolg raised, "siding with my principles!"
Gilgamesh easily jumped out of the way of Lancer's attack, and he landed on his feet with a slight, amused grin. "Really? You're going to break your contract when you're this close to getting the Holy Grail?"
"You're missing the whole point!" Lancer charged forward, thrusting his spear again. "Real heroes don't give a damn about a second chance at life!"
Again, Gilgamesh avoided the blow. Less than a second later, another sword materialized in his hand, and he knocked Lancer away from him.
"Lancer, you are no match for him by yourself!" Saber exclaimed.
The spearman landed on his feet, not sparing the knight a glance. "Just take your woman and get the hell out of here. I'm not protecting you because I want your friendship."
Saber bit his lip, torn between helping Lancer fight Gilgamesh and escaping with Shira while they still had the chance. Finally, he gave a brief nod.
"Good luck to you, then."
Shira and Saber turned around and hurried up the stairs as quickly as they could. Gilgamesh and Lancer exchanged more words, but Shira hardly listened as she and Saber left the underground chapel and made their way out of the church.
It was only when Shira and Saber arrived at a cemetery that they were forced to stop, the former's injury throbbing again.
"Let me take a look at your wound," Saber said after Shira sat down in the grass. He knelt down beside her and pressed his hand to the spot where she'd been stabbed; if he was at all embarrassed about touching her chest, he refused to show it.
"My apologies, Shira, but this may hurt a little." So saying, he closed his eyes and his hand began to glow. Shira screwed her own eyes shut and gritted her teeth as Saber suddenly dug his fingers into her wound, doing her best to contain the pained noises that wanted to escape her mouth. As the seconds passed, though, the pain started to fade.
Shira opened her eyes as Saber withdrew his hand.
"I repaired the scabbard with my own mana," he explained. "Your injury will begin healing shortly."
"Scabbard?" Shira frowned in confusion. "Wait, are you talking about Excalibur's scabbard?"
Saber nodded. "Yes, Avalon, the scabbard that was stolen from me towards the end of my reign. Believe it or not, Shira, Avalon is inside your body. It was only when you projected it two nights ago that I realized how you have been able to heal so quickly. And it explains how an untrained magus like you would be able to summon me—Avalon was used as a catalyst."
"But why the heck would a scabbard be in my body?" Shira wanted to know.
"I can only assume that it was all Kiritsugu's doing," the knight replied.
The redhead blinked quizzically. "My dad?"
"In the previous Holy Grail War, Avalon was also used to summon me as Kiritsugu's Servant. Since that scabbard is a Noble Phantasm that heals the bearer's wounds, Kiritsugu thought it would be more advantageous to keep it rather than return it to me." Saber paused. "And after the War was over, amidst the charred ruins, he stumbled upon a dying young girl. Embedding Avalon in that girl's body was the only choice he had to save her life."
Shira absentmindedly put her hand to her chest, quietly absorbing Saber's words. After that fire, she had fully expected to die; what other fate was there for her? But her father came along and saved her life...by putting a magical, healing scabbard inside her body.
And to hear Saber tell it, it looked like her summoning him had been less of an accident than she thought.
"I'm sorry," Shira said out loud, smiling wryly, "for using your scabbard to patch myself up."
"Don't be." The smile on Saber's face was gentle. "When I realized Avalon was with you, I was very happy. I had never been able to save anything...except for your life, Shira."
Warmth that had nothing to do with the sunlight shining down on them blossomed in Shira's heart. She could detect no lie in Saber's voice, just like before in the underground chapel when he declared that he would rather have her than anything the Holy Grail could give him. He might not have actually said those three little words to her, and maybe he would never be comfortable enough to say them, but Shira finally knew the truth: he reciprocated her love for him.
She was seriously considering kissing him right there in the cemetery when Saber spoke again, staring into space.
"Kiritsugu was right. I have no need for the Holy Grail. He must have seen it before I did, that I cannot go back and change the past. He saw the truth of what I have been deceiving myself with this entire time."
He looked back at Shira with another, sadder smile. "Please forgive me, not merely for pursuing such a misguided wish, but for how I treated you last night."
"It's okay," she assured him. Being rejected after their kiss had hurt, but after today, she couldn't hold it against him if she tried.
"Shira," Saber began after a moment of silence, "I now know the path I must take."
He didn't elaborate, but she knew what he was saying. He had accepted his past as it was and no longer wanted to change it. Therefore, there was only one thing left to do.
"All right, then," Shira said, intertwining her fingers with Saber's. "Let's destroy the Holy Grail."
She knew exactly what would happen. Destroying the Holy Grail meant that Saber would disappear from this world. He would go back in time, go back to lying underneath that tree, and die of his battle wounds.
And no matter how badly she wanted him to stay, no matter how much she would miss him once he was gone, Shira knew this was no time for tears.
This was a time to be strong.
Saber gave Shira's hand a light squeeze. "I was confident that you would come to that same conclusion, Master."
Author's Note: This is the beginning of the end, guys. *sniffles*
In summary, Shira and Saber have two separate angst fests, it's discovered just how big of a creep Kotomine really is, Saber FINALLY realizes that his wish is all about him wallowing in false guilt (plus, the Holy Grail is a rip-off), Lancer gets awesome (and knows a ship when he sees one), and Saber and Shira have at last resolved their UST (kind of).